Lots of info for this one. I'm not sure all of it is relevant to socionics, but I thought I'd include all my notes, just for completeness' sake.
The first thing my sister said when I asked what she thinks of him was "He's kind of mean."
People say he has mood swings. Not as bad as they once were. *shrug* It could be true. From what I've seen he does tend to oscillate a little, but I haven't noticed anything huge or especially dramatic, yet.
He can get snappish sometimes, and bossy toward those he's in charge of. He'll yell at them if they're not doing something right. Not necessarily a really angry shout; more like just raising the volume of his voice. He says he can be domineering sometimes, which I suppose is true. (We've joked that part of my job the next few months will be to keep people from hating him.) He likes things to be a specific way, the way that they should be.
For example, he lifeguards, and he is one of the most picky lifeguards I've ever encountered. "*blows whistle* Three on the ladder!" "*whistle* Please get off the rope!" "*whistle* Hey, you there. You! Please make sure she's out of the way before you jump in!" "*looking at my feet* What? Are those shoes on my deck?" "*WHISTLE!* Three on the ladder!!" All the while hunched there with a sort of scowl on his face. He usually doesn't yell without a decent reason, though.
Yelling or not, he can give pretty good directions and is fairly good at planning things practically and simply. He also seems good at accepting input on how to make things better. At least, when you approach him at the right time. I've yet to see how this really plays out, though, which will be important for doing my own job well.
When people ask him for things, his first response is usually, "No." His rationale for that is that it's better to say "no" first, then "yes" later, than get people's hopes up only to dash them later.
Likes manual labor. Loves it, actually. "Give me a shovel, axe, or some bark-dust to spread and I’ll be happy." He likes physical contact and wrestling with other guys. Like several other boys I know, he likes fire and claims to like blowing things up. Has an impressive knife collection.
Can easily discuss gross topics with people, including my ESFj friend.
Gets along well with the ESFj. She says they have a respect for each other, and she will often provoke him into playful banter. She says she can be rougher toward him than me.
Is shy. Calls himself a xenophobe (hence the name). He knows it's a weakness and tries to work on it.
Gets embarrassed easily. Is awkward and clumsy sometimes, and if someone notices and laughs he laughs, too, but turns red. So I often pretend not to notice and try not to laugh. I actually do that for a lot of people, but for some reason I find it harder not to smile in his case. I can't pinpoint why, but there's something about him that tends to tickle the giggle center of my brain. It's easier if it's just me that's present, because then I can go ahead and smile a little, but warmly, and non-verbally sort of let him know that it's ok and that I don't think any less of him. After all, I can be quite clumsy, too, etc. But if other people are there, they'll see that I'm smiling and then notice why and laugh at him, which I don't like and tend to feel guilty about.
Despite the above, he can be a bit silly sometimes. He'll do a funny dance, tell funny stories, sing songs when requested to. While some of it may be a reaction to nervousness, a lot of it is just because he can be a playful, almost childlike person.
Seems very insecure in many ways. He'll often sit hunched into himself, almost as if he's unconsciously making himself smaller, even though he's almost 6'.
Like me, he can be intimidated by our ESTp boss, though they get along fine.
So far, I've gotten along fine with him, too. He's never yelled at me and always speaks politely to me. I know if I need his direct attention I've got it. We can gently joke back and forth, and we seem to connect fairly well in terms of understanding each other, what we're saying and thinking; it doesn't take a whole lot of explaining to get our points across to each other. Simple statements work well. I find it relatively easy to read him.
He likes kids and tends to talk to them more as if they were on the same level as him. He's developed a special connection with the ESTp's youngest son, who in turn thinks him one of the greatest people ever. He tends to take on a fatherly role toward the boy, correcting and teaching him things.
He doesn't always spell very well, but he's fond of longer words. He's pretty smart (smarter, I think, than he often comes across) and likes to think and talk about some of the same things I do, like people and religion. He's got a degree in theology and is looking toward getting his master's. He wants to teach at a college someday. Half-jokingly, he'll use his education as leverage in discussions. "Who here is a certified theologian? Raise your hand! ...I thought so." Therefore, he's right and his opponent (usually a subordinate) is wrong. But, like I said, it's done jokingly and I think is used more to quell his impudent underlings than really make a point or win a debate. In a real discussion, he tends to rely on what he's learned, especially facts, without making strong statements.
In a few funny ways, he reminds me a bit of mcnew. Except, Phobie's a little more stable, more satisfied in his inner core, I guess you could say. But they have similar insecurities (no offense, mcnew).
Some people tend to focus on his grumpy behavior, but it's easy for me to see beyond that and not take it too seriously. The insecurity is much more obvious to me, and I like to encourage and support him when I can.
Hey, (after all this) I have another question - other than the "what type is he?" one, to which I would appreciate an answer, too: Do you think I put too much of a delta spin on my descriptions? Perhaps I put too much of an emphasis on what resonates the most with me? I feel I might not be objective, and as such am giving a skewed perspective of these people.