PS: I am also a 7 and it does not take long for me to lose interest when I don't get the attention I need. I don't want that to happen, but I can't help it, especially since I deal with frustration by throwing myself into some other experience.
PS: I am also a 7 and it does not take long for me to lose interest when I don't get the attention I need. I don't want that to happen, but I can't help it, especially since I deal with frustration by throwing myself into some other experience.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Yeah, I get that. I was like that until I became slightly jaded by dating...then started holding back a bit... and then things worked out. The irony....
Fwiw, I have asked my husband, and asked him again today, whether he would have liked for me to pursue him more, and he said he would probably have liked it more bc he didn't like having to take the risk and "do all the dating b.s." So who knows. I have my theory described above, but I recognize I could be wrong
"In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is." - Yogi Berra
Thanks for sharing your experience. Right now he would have to do the pursuing anyway since I am done writing the first text. So I guess I am jaded, too.Originally Posted by SongOfSapphire
Yeah, I get that. I was like that until I became slightly jaded...then stepped back...and then things worked out. The irony....
Fwiw, I have asked my husband, and asked him again today, whether he would have liked for me to pursue him more, and he said he would probably have liked it more bc he didn't like having to take the risk. So who knows. I have my pet theory described above, but I could well be wrong
We will see, but I do think it does not bode well when I am already frustrated after the first date. I will keep you posted.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Does not apply to this SLI. Body language can be helpful and telling, but verbal communication is imperative.
Maybe, but in general it will just give them hints about your physical (or mental) states and composure.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
BTW, I think romance is an overrated (and overutilized) illusion. It's irrational and destructive, and people often fail to see how it actually destroys relationships and deters people from truly loving each other.
Also,
People...
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Romance might be irrational, but it's only as destructive as people allow it to be. You have to nurture romance and be gentle with it and the person you are dealing with, just like with love. It's always a matter of respect, romance, love, or otherwise.
And this is why I make it very clear during/after the date how I feel about the person. But of course I am an extroverted feeler and don't find it that hard.Also,
People...
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
SLIs proceed defensively and the older they get, the more defensive they become. They really do want to trust but the more that they've been burnt, the higher the castle walls. A person has to be judged trustworthy, and only then will the SLI lower the drawbridge but still may have a sword in the hand.......
a.k.a I/O
What a great video.
She: LSI
He: EIE
Tagged to watch
-
Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
sounds right.
"A man with a definite belief always appears bizarre, because he does not change with the world; he has climbed into a fixed star, and the earth whizzes below him like a zoetrope."
........ G. ........... K. ............... C ........ H ........ E ...... S ........ T ...... E ........ R ........ T ........ O ........ N ........
"Having a clear faith, based on the creed of the Church, is often labeled today as fundamentalism... Whereas relativism, which is letting oneself be tossed and swept along
by every wind of teaching, looks like the only
attitude acceptable to today's standards." - Pope Benedict the XVI, "The Dictatorship of Relativism"
.
.
.
I must be Beta then.What a great video.
She: LSI
He: EIE
Seriously though, I think the video just attempts to portray how generic psychological vulnerabilities most people have can play out in a dating scenario.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
@Kim Here's something experimental to try if you have someone who'd be up for it.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
@Kim, I hear you. Don't know about you but I would much rather chase, direct, initiate etc ... I mean obviously I would like my partner to reciprocate but yeah, there are some things I prefer
This makes me feel better.@Kim, I hear you. Don't know about you but I would much rather chase, direct, initiate etc ... I mean obviously I would like my partner to reciprocate but yeah, there are some things I prefer
I don't think I have a need to chase or direct or initiate though. It's more that I don't mind doing it if it means things then progress at a pace that I like. I am terribly excitable, enthusiastic and impatient, so sitting around waiting for someone to make the next move when I already know what I want is torturous. I also don't see why I should - it seems like they should know me as I am and that is part of me.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Hmm... and you're female, right?@Kim, I hear you. Don't know about you but I would much rather chase, direct, initiate etc ... I mean obviously I would like my partner to reciprocate but yeah, there are some things I prefer
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Yeah.
Well, this guy apparently was no longer interested, which turns out to be great because I met another SLI (the most typical of all SLIs I have ever met) and fell head over heels and so did he. I am not sure what is happening, but it's pretty amazing...
The only problem is that I am not getting any work done up here on cloud 9...
Last edited by Kim; 10-05-2016 at 01:45 PM.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Maybe you should stop getting so excited over every new guy you meet, but meet as many of them as you can, and let time take care of the rest. You just need to socialize and put yourself in places where you'll meet new, and hang around with both old and new, acquaintances. This should be much easier for you to do, than for someone reserved, skeptical, cynical, and energy-conserving like myself.
Last edited by Park; 10-06-2016 at 01:21 AM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
And how many other females do you know who are forthcoming and unreserved in relationships like you are?
Also, what kind of places do you like to hang out at? Where do you meet people?
Last edited by Park; 10-06-2016 at 01:22 AM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Very few ladies are like me, some ESFPs and ENTJs. I'd be at work engagements, poetry clubs and idk that's how I usually meet people.
There is only one thing I should stop doing, and that is cater to self-absorbed douchebags who feel they are so special and so deep and that their needs trump all because whothefuckknowswhy. THAT has been my problem - giving people the time of the day who are nothing but entitled selfish babies or sociopaths or both.
And what would you know about my social life?
Last edited by Kim; 10-06-2016 at 03:08 PM.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Over it.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
That's a different issue.
Not much at all.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Exactly.
I met someone, I like him, he likes me back, he is a lovely, caring, and considerate person, it feels great, it has lots of potential, so there is no need to hold back or be cautious.
If it doesn't work out, I will pick up the pieces and move on like I always do.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
No, just the infinitesimal possibility of you misjudging a person and catering to a self-absorbed douche-bag or a sociopath you're going to whine about after the fact. But that's never happened before, so no worries.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Aren't you just a doll.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Duals are so cute.
Sure sign someone is an SLI? Owns every single "man toy" under the sun (truck, two Harleys, four-wheeler, snowmobile, one of those little car thingies I can't remember the name of, multiple trailers, every conceivable tool to build and repair things with), a decked out garage/man cave he built, a pool he built, not to mention fencing, flooring, decks, home remodel he did himself. Hardwood floors out of a tree he had to cut down. Attached a solar panel to a trailer so the battery does not run out. Built a treehouse for his friend's kids that I would live in. Installed water system in his cabin in the woods and added bathroom and shower.
My reaction:"what in the world do you want with me? I am practically useless..."
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Have sex?
I know IEE girls usually fuck on the first date so... a good match I would say.
This is something I find curious about socionics stereotypes, particularly of SLIs. My husband is (by his own admission) pretty lazy and probably wouldn't bother w most of the types of things like in @Kim's post. He can perform manual labor well but prefers not to. On the other hand I know an LSI who could even be the person Kim describes, who seems always to be at the very least tinkering w some project. I'm not trying to re-type Kim's guy or anything; I just want point out how some of the stereotypes around here can be misleading.
"In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is." - Yogi Berra
I love us IEE’s 🥺🥰. Are you still on this forum?? Did you end up marrying the last SLI you spoke about here?! I’ve referred to this thread a few times trying to figure out what’s happening with my last (new) SLI, I’m over it now since I’m came to the conclusion that he either had a relationship that hasn’t fully ended or he just has severe trust issues and he thinks I’m way too attractive for him lollll (I’m really humble he’s just told me he doesn’t believe that I actually liked him because of that) but enough about me! Did you marry him?! Or another lucky SLI maybe ? How did the beginning of the relationship progress? Where do u recon I find my next SLI? loll
Xxxx
I don't even remember who this was!The relationship must have ended like they all did at the time - they were excited at first and then just kind of dropped off/turned out to be jerks/turned out to be married, etc.
I did marry someone, but I still don't know his type.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
SLI is shy, reclusive, unsure about motives (sensory type) unsure about relationships (logical type)
Sorry IEE, the job is yours - he or she is not going to do much unless you jump on him/her
Doesn't seem to have worked for Kim... unless she actually chased (initiated and maintained contact with) the guy she ended up marrying, as well.
And while I'm not shy, I do have schizoid tendencies and feel overly skeptical (and sometimes even cynical) about relationships. Which is why I sometimes wish I was a female so I'd have an easier time connecting with people, especially for romantic/sexual/spousal purposes.
Last edited by Park; 07-20-2022 at 05:29 AM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
I talked to my SLI friend the other day who is married to an IEE. He made it seem like she was coming after him, he said they had real good banter, but the day he knew she liked him, he knew because she left her friends to invite him to her party. He said he could also tell because her friends started asking where he was gonna be at. And the IEE said she knew the SLI liked her because everytime she went into his store he played her favorite song.
Yeah, I'm not that clueless or "unsure" about relationships, either. Especially after I have observed and/or interacted with someone for a bit. But I'm relatively cynical and skeptical which lessens my motivation to be proactive about it, and it's extremely rare to bump into someone I like who also likes me back. It's usually very one-sided for me, for whatever reason.
Last edited by Park; 07-18-2022 at 07:27 AM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Just drop by with a bouquet of second-hand clothes and that cheapskate will love you forever
... for real now. Talk like a true IEE about the people you know, strange situations (IEE seem to be haunted by them and they love talking about it), do the voices of the people that appear in the anecdote, inject some theatricality. Don't forget the pout or project a strange voice/giggle here and there to remind them that you're a child-like weirdo. And then be on your merry way to meet with more people because you're asocial butterfly and that's what you do. She or he will be left alone in his dark dungeon.
Sicuramente cercherai il significato di questo.
Te types have limited threshold for theatricality - it's more charming for Ti types. Te types like the ethics to be primarily kind, soft, emotionally considerate, not explosive and theatrical. With that said, ILI/SLI do not prefer the quiet and kind ESI/EII but the louder, contacting and impulsive SEE/IEEJust drop by with a bouquet of second-hand clothes and that cheapskate will love you forever
... for real now. Talk like a true IEE about the people you know, strange situations (IEE seem to be haunted by them and they love talking about it), do the voices of the people that appear in the anecdote, inject some theatricality. Don't forget the pout or project a strange voice/giggle here and there to remind them that you're a child-like weirdo. And then be on your merry way to meet with more people because you're asocial butterfly and that's what you do. She or he will be left alone in his dark dungeon.
Let's put it this way: when the an IEE is enthusiastically talking about a specific situation or people, there is a perception of theatrics, even if you want to split hairs about the best use for the word. IEE are fantastic storytellers.
The theatricality you're referring to in in the merry quadras gives more the impression of wanting to stimulate Ti leads directly. That's different from what I was implying.
Sicuramente cercherai il significato di questo.
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