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Thread: Whines a lot - type?

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    Default Whines a lot - type?

    The subject line is not all there is to it haha.

    This person however does whine a lot. I notice frequently it is either a) something about their health or b) something about their mood (" i just feel iffy today" etc).

    And if it's neither of the above, then it turns out a new leak has materialized in their apartment. Or they commuted to visit someone and the bus was 'extremely late' to come.

    It bugs me because they answer exactly in the negative to my morning question 'how are you today". And while i am often interested in the other person's wellbeing, i notice this person uses the answer to this question as an excuse to dump w/e. It does impact me immune as i try to be.

    They have a relatively monotonous way of speaking. Except, when they don't. That is occasionally they use very (but very) exaggerated gestures combined with a an exaggerated tone of voice to imitate someone else (like when telling a story). I find this sort of exaggeration very gross.

    They like to say often how much they work. Even if by other people's accounts it doesn't all add up.

    Have a general "i try and work so hard" attitude.

    Any type suggestions?

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    EIE or LSE maybe

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    I think ESEs do this quite a bit.

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    1 fixed 6

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    -Fi and -Fe ppl. Also type 4 and 6, maybe 1 too

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    I think I complain a lot but not in the way of the person you're describing. For me it's like a tic to let off steam and ease anxiety. Some people are so enthusiastic and seem downright gleeful about it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Delilah View Post
    I notice frequently it is either a) something about their health or b) something about their mood (" i just feel iffy today" etc).
    Mostly F types.

    Generally, T types prefer to talk about emotions to a few close people only. Similar situation is about troubles - say to ones who may help, not just to whine and get emotions.
    The theme of health is more popular among Si valued types. About general mood - Fe valued.
    Extraverts are easier to talk about themselves to others.

    ESE would fit to your description the most.

    > Or they commuted to visit someone and the bus was 'extremely late' to come.

    mb Ni polr

    > That is occasionally they use very (but very) exaggerated gestures combined with a an exaggerated tone of voice to imitate someone else (like when telling a story).

    also F-E types are loudest in the universe

    > They like to say often how much they work.

    mb Te role

    > Have a general "i try and work so hard" attitude.

    F types accent the efforts they did to get more of acknowledgement

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    Ya, i'm leaning ESE too, sigh lol

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    Sometimes ILE and SLE whines alot. Theres always something wrong, somebody has a bad attitude or something is not as it should be. Fi PoLR

    But not always of course
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

    (Jung on Si)

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    Unhealthy people of any type are more likely to whine as described in the OP, I think.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Avebury View Post
    Unhealthy people of any type are more likely to whine as described in the OP, I think.
    Hmm. She is not unhealthy imo. She seems quite well-adjusted actually like in her daily life she manages fine, has a decent social circle, job, hobbies, interests etc. Honestly, how she whines bugs me but i don't think it is related to levels of health or unhealth.

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    Whining = Fe.

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    Definitely seems Fe
    7w6 9w1 2w3 sx/? RLUAI(rl|U|ai)

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    Nah it's Fi.

    "Wahhh a SLE said something that hurt my Fi-lings instead of letting it to I'm going to blow it out of proportion and try to get everybody else to hate him/her for me."

    "Wahhhhhh you said something really outlandish and out there, instead of taking it as a joke like it was intended I am going to take it too seriously and hate you forever about it. How dare you talk about that, talk about this instead."

    (sry just had to break up the Fi circle jerking a bit for balance reasons.)

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    They're called "feelers"

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    Quote Originally Posted by dead bnd View Post
    Wahhh a SLE said something that hurt my Fi-lings instead of letting it to I'm going to blow it out of proportion and try to get everybody else to hate him/her for me.
    Initially hurted can be anything, not only feelings. Like some F type carriers whined - "do not argue with me"! They hated to see the opposite opinion when were unable to protect own opinion logically. Or you may make physical pain (S) to someone - he'll whine too, and this will be not about emotions.

    > try to get everybody else to hate him

    "everybody" - means to show someone as having objectively negative trait - relates to Fe, the try to create negative general image. Fe types like such manipulations, where often use lie and exaggerations as do not respect the reality (Te).

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    yeah Fi types being butt hurt over SLE and trying to make them look bad is just a Fe interpretation of the issue. Fi doesn't look at merely "being made to look bad" as important, so unless they're psychologically savy and know only SLE cares about that, they're unlikely to take that route. most the time SLE makes themselves look bad, and Fi just brings that out as a byproduct of exposing the Fi "facts." Making SLE look bad to control them is what IEI does

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bertrand View Post
    yeah Fi types being butt hurt over SLE and trying to make them look bad is just a Fe interpretation of the issue
    Fi behave in Fe way lesser, - lesser spread gossips about bad traits in others. They more think "he's bad for me. but for other one mb good" as they tend to use relative/subjective ethics.
    They tend to say how someone have hurted them to close people only who may compassionate them. Instead of to anyone to make other people hate the "bad one" who hurted only them. Also Fi types when complain to close ones tend to do not show someone as "bad" in general, but more as a concrete case which made them upset.

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    yeah totes

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    Could be Fe but I'd like more information.

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    Always assume EIE

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    My ILE coworker whined a lot... about the weather, about his wife's salary (it's low but his is high...and they aren't going to have kids), about people and how "awful" they are, about how many hours he has to work (not many), about how, when he was trying to get up the elevator all of the elevators were going down so he had to wait

    He is E7 btw. When he gets moody he gets petty.

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    Quote Originally Posted by niffer View Post
    EIE or LSE maybe
    I'm curious what makes you think EIE? I am wondering about this person's type again. You could even be right - can you point me to dichotomies/something else you're using for this?

    This person is definitely not LSE btw, that's completely off.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallmo View Post
    Sometimes ILE and SLE whines alot. Theres always something wrong, somebody has a bad attitude or something is not as it should be. Fi PoLR

    But not always of course
    This is interesting, can you elaborate on how this behaviour is tied to Fi Polr?

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    Quote Originally Posted by thehotelambush View Post
    Could be Fe but I'd like more information.
    I work with this person and they are proving to be a huge gossip. I found out that a couple of things I had confided in them (general dissatisfaction with work and pay) they had duly 'reported' to my boss. It is appalling.

    Another thing i'm finding is they are an out and out ass-kisser towards said boss. Like every opportunity they get they say things like (to the boss) "oh i've learned so much from you", and 'You are so great at such and such". It is a bit strange - from my perspective, of course.

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    I wonder if this could be EII-Ne somehow. meh.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bertrand View Post
    yeah Fi types being butt hurt over SLE and trying to make them look bad is just a Fe interpretation of the issue. Fi doesn't look at merely "being made to look bad" as important, so unless they're psychologically savy and know only SLE cares about that, they're unlikely to take that route. most the time SLE makes themselves look bad, and Fi just brings that out as a byproduct of exposing the Fi "facts." Making SLE look bad to control them is what IEI does
    My dear Bertrand, one day an SLE dressed as Donald Trump will arrive on your doorstep. She will violate your dignity and your journey to the dark side will then be complete.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dead bnd View Post
    I think ESEs do this quite a bit.
    Oh god, you should hear my mother whine.

    "I knew it! You have not gone and sorted out things when you said that you would. Nobody ever does any work if it was not for me. No, no, you don't care about me at all! Oh how I suffer! All the things I do for you! Oh, what will become of us?!?"

    "I think it's time for your fourth cup of tea, mum."

    "Yes. Yes. Make me some tea. Thank you. But don't you dare forget to ring [insert names here] as you could really get so much out of it. And remember to do the dishes and take the bottles out, oh, I can't stand the sight of them! I am so worried about you drinking, it keeps me awake at night. You are so unkind."

    "I have a plan and know that when it needs to be executed, it shall be. So there is no need for you to be worried."

    "And when will that be? What 'plans'? Your 'plans' are just an excuse to do nothing!"

    "You will wait as long as is necessary." *leaves*
    Last edited by Spermatozoa; 05-17-2018 at 04:27 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallmo View Post
    Sometimes ILE and SLE whines alot. Theres always something wrong, somebody has a bad attitude or something is not as it should be. Fi PoLR

    But not always of course
    After considering various types for this person, I agree with you that she is a Fi Polr Type: always something wrong with another's attitude, someone isn't being positive enough etc. She also has zero awareness of boundaries and crosses them often, including saying horrible things about other people, things that border on cruel. I have typed her as ILE, a truly appalling person imo and a snake in the grass.

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    Sounds exactly like my aunt. I once walked past her and my uncle while they were engrossed in a conversation to ask my sister a question ("did you get the text about grandma's death?"), then left the room because they were still busy talking. According to my sister, she then spent the next 15 minutes pissing and moaning that I hadn't said hello and "how grown up of him," "I guess he won't be having...," etc etc. Constantly complains that people from other departments are incompetent and how lucky they are to have her around to set everything straight. Lots of "we," language, and not as a party or family or whatever, but "we Californians," "we progressives," (?) and so on. Once posted a facebook image of herself with some sort of AIDs awareness text superimposed (she doesn't have AIDs or know anyone with AIDs). Pathological liar, spread some rumor about my sister being into gangster rap, can't imagine why it would even matter. Worries she's losing her mind when basic mistakes happen like misplacing her keys, cries.

    I suspected some sort of Fe valuing but I don't really know, and it seems like a dangerous suggestion in the first place to associate this behavior with an IE. It strikes me as extreme neuroticism meets cubicle culture. I don't talk to her about it and try not to let on how irksome it is, mainly because the waves of second-hand embarrassment I feel when I hear this noise makes me want to avoid making it worse. I'd be pained to live that way.
    Last edited by Mudlark; 07-15-2018 at 05:41 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shackleton View Post
    ...

    I suspected some sort of Fe valuing but I don't really know, and it seems like a dangerous suggestion in the first place to associate this behavior with an IE. It strikes me as extreme neuroticism meets cubicle culture. I don't talk to her about it and try not to let on how irksome it is, mainly because the waves of second-hand embarrassment I feel when I hear this noise makes me want to avoid making it worse. I'd be pained to live that way.
    Imo it is possible to associate it with an IE, so long as you don't generalize that everyone from that type will be the same (allowing for individual differences and varied degrees of neuroticism/ maladaption. In my case i hesitated typing this person because of this reason exactly,m yet i've concluded that Ep-Ti is very clear and so long as i just am aware of their Fi polr that's enugh for me no need to nail it down to a specific type.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Delilah View Post
    Imo it is possible to associate it with an IE, so long as you don't generalize that everyone from that type will be the same (allowing for individual differences and varied degrees of neuroticism/ maladaption. In my case i hesitated typing this person because of this reason exactly,m yet i've concluded that Ep-Ti is very clear and so long as i just am aware of their Fi polr that's enugh for me no need to nail it down to a specific type.
    Fair enough, all I mean to say is that the IEs presumably evolved as adaptations to the environment so I'm hesitant to link strictly maladaptive behavior to any of them without also accounting for outside stressors and placement in model A wrt my own comment about Fe, not yours.

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    Not so much type related: anyone not taking responsibility for their own lives usually whines a lot, because that is what they do instead of taking action to resolve whatever is bothering them. As if whining will cause the listener to solve your problems.

    My GF is about to end a friendship with someone she knows (LSE) since high school, all this woman does is whine about work. The problem here is she hates her job (at the Dutch national bank), but it pays very handsomely and she has a daughter which is slightly handicapped and thus needs special care, so she is not willing to give up the job for something else that pays less but is more enjoyable. Meanwhile her private life is void of enjoyable activities. Thus all this negative energy has to go somewhere and the easiest is to whine to somebody who is willing to put up with the emotional abuse. This is the typical pattern with most whiners: they hate their situation, but are not willing to do something about it or accept the situation as is.

    Any type in such a situation can whine. Personally to me the most annoying types when whining are SLEs. There is no bigger loser than a whining SLE.

    I used to attract whiners like bees to a honey pot. Nowadays I rigorously shut them out of my life.
    Last edited by consentingadult; 07-15-2018 at 08:34 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    Not so much type related: anyone not taking responsibility for their own lives usually whines a lot, because that is what they do instead of taking action to resolve whatever is bothering them. As if whining will cause the listener to solve your problems.

    My GF is about to end a friendship with someone she knows (LSE) since high school, all this woman does is whine about work. The problem here is she hates her job (at the Dutch national bank), but it pays very handsomely and she has a daughter which is slightly handicapped and thus needs special care, so she is not willing to give up the job for something else that pays less but is more enjoyable. Meanwhile her private life is void of enjoyable activities. Thus all this negative energy has to go somewhere and the easiest is to whine to somebody who is willing to put up with the emotional abuse. This is the typical pattern with most whiners: they hate their situation, but are not willing to do something about it or accept the situation as is.

    Any type in such a situation can whine. Personally to me the most annoying types when whining are SLEs. There is no bigger loser than a whining SLE.

    I used to attract whiners like bees to a honey pot. Nowadays I rigorously shut them out of my life.
    Yeah but you could show a little more compassion given this woman's situation and all.

    You sound like she is to blame for having a handicapped daughter and basically sacrificing herself in the process of trying to put food on the table.

    I admit I find your attitude shocking.

    While I agree there is such a thing as people not taking responsibility, and in those cases "whining" becomes a way of avoiding said responsibility. But in this case it seems like she is taking responsibility, it's just that she can't change her situation because her hands are tied.

    Based on what you wrote it sounds like she is braver than you give her credit for.
    Last edited by WVBRY; 07-15-2018 at 11:21 AM.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Avebury View Post
    Yeah but you could show a little more compassion given this woman's situation and all.

    You sound like she is to blame for having a handicapped daughter and basically sacrificing herself in the process of trying to put food on the table.

    I admit I find your attitude shocking.

    While I agree there is such a thing as people not taking responsibility, and in those cases "whining" becomes a way of avoiding said responsibility. But in this case it seems like she is taking responsibility, it's just that she can't change her situation because her hands are tied.

    Based on what you wrote it sounds like she is braver than you give her credit for.
    Shut the fuck up, you do not know the situation as I do, so keep your opinion about this particular story to yourself, and especially your moral critique. Even better, realize that you should not have had one in the first place. One more person on ignore!
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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    Shut the fuck up, you do not know the situation as I do, so keep your opinion about this particular story to yourself, and especially your moral critique. Even better, realize that you should not have had one in the first place. One more person on ignore!
    How grown up.

    But tbh I expected a reaction like this, I just felt like getting my opinion out there anyways. What you wrote shocked me, it came of really dickheaded.

    Besides, I am aware I don't know the full situation, that's why I said "based on what you wrote...".

    And if you don't want people to comment on real life situations of yours don't post about on a forum and then play victim when someone does comment.

    Also, if you have half the forum on ignore, maybe it's not half the forum, it's you who is the problem.


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