Originally Posted by
xerxe
I'm very much guaranteed to seclude myself and start doing this obsessively once I have the money to quit my job. One of my pet interests is swam intelligence — I want to transform an ant colony into a living computer. Once I'm done with ants, I'd like to create a eusocial variant of either crows or octupuses before the government makes it illegal to tinker with yet another intelligent species. I feel as though my whole life has been building up to this point. I have no scientific ethics whatsoever and don't particularly care about social disapproval.
All that is well and good, but you're going to be disappointed when the ants steal your identity and the crows have you shot by the police.
Well, Mr. President, it’s the bees and spiders again! They stole my food stamps, and sold ’em to the rats. And I tried to get down to my car, for to honk the horn for help, but the snakes has gotten it for the cockroaches. I go back upstairs, but the spiders has jammed the police lock! I ain’t been inside for a week, and I know that my wife is sleepin’ with the bees!
Could you state that as a question, please?
Well sure, Mr. President! Where can I get a job?!
From I Think We’re All Bozos on This Bus, 1971.