Deltas and shopping

[Minde]

Do any of you similarly find it exhausting and a chore, particularly clothing shopping? I've never been one of those stereotypical women/girls who seem to consider it recreational. There ARE some circumstances where I get close to something that resembles enjoyment, but it's like the stars have to align right first.

My ENFp sister enjoys it more than I do, and as I trust her overall taste I've decided I'm going to try to bring her along on the next couple of trips. I figure if I simply play her mannequin I'll end up with good clothes and less stress.

(This is largely a lament based on recent trip prep, though if actual socionics discussion takes place all the better.)


Please discuss. Or console.

[Absurd]

I don't know, I just go in, look for something I already have had in my mind, and walk out after obtaining it.

[fairylights]

My LSE best friend loves shopping. She enjoys finding bargains and figuring out what will look good with what and stuff like that. I've always enjoyed shopping with her. She's resourceful and has a nice even level of energy. Neither hyperactive nor Eeyore.

[ashlesha]

i think an EII i know has a shopping addiction. but i'm not close enough to her to speculate about the roots or to relate it to functions in any way. she buys a lot of things for other people; there have been a couple times we've been out together and i've made a passing remark about liking something and later in the car she's handed it to me. she also hoards a lot - her garage can't be used to park cars in. she's the only person who genuinely doesn't seem to mind the fact that i can take hourrrrs picking out clothes.

i was with my SLI ex a few days ago doing school shopping for the kids and we were finished but everybody was kind of dawdling. and the store was really packed and when i'm in walmart that long and its bustling i start to feel claustrophic. so i was like: "ahem. HEY GO. go go. go. go. go," making hand motions at everybody toward the register. and he looked at me and laughed knowingly and i was like, "i just. can't." and he said, "i miss shopping with you."

[DirectorAbbie]

Shopping for school/office supplies has always been kinda fun because of the exciting options. Shopping for food can be enjoyable when I feel like I got a good deal or am able to look forward to a good meal.

Clothes shopping, though...ug. I hate it. Stores never have anything good. I hate jeans; I want slacks. And why are skinny people expected to wear such awful shirts? At least catalogs sometimes have something decent, but the prices are so high! If I had room for a sewing machine in my room, I'd be making my own clothes. Nothing fancy; just the basic sort of pattern I used to draw onto stick figures when I was a kid. If it covers me and stays on, it works. And I'd have more control over the color and texture.

[anndelise]

I cant stand clothes shopping, but i recognize it as a semi-necessary evil. When i do go, i look for a cut that fits comfortably, then i buy all the colors of it that I can tolerate. For example, my tshirts come in two different necklines, some of the colors overlap.

I dislike shopping for household items, too. Functional items leave me worried about durability and replacement costs. Decorative items...well, i dont decorate, lol. My moods and ideas change too quickly and often, and decorating just isnt important to me, and is risky of adding more clutter.

Food shopping is necessary, but i dont enjoy it. I just want to get in, get the items, and get out. Unfortunately, since i choose my meal at the time of wanting to eat, i dont usually have what i am in the mood for. I've never been successful with meal planning before the trip, either. So i just go in now, with a simple list of "proteins (eggs, buffalo, fish, chicken/turkey), fats (butter, cheese, olive oil, coconut oil), vegetables (seasonal, preferably local, else <$2/lb), possibly fruit".

Book shopping?? Yeah, i could spend hours at a book store browsing through the selections. priorities, ftw

[Park]

Do any of you similarly find it exhausting and a chore, particularly clothing shopping?

Sometimes, but it depends on who I'm shopping with. If by myself, I look around, ask for prices, try something on if I like it, and leave quickly. I try to remember what sells where and at what price, so if I find something I like sold cheaper somewhere else, I get it from there. Or if I want something specific, I look for prices online and go to the place that seems to have the best deal and is close to where I navigate. Music and tech stores are a completely different story.

[Iris]

Do any of you similarly find it exhausting and a chore, particularly clothing shopping? I've never been one of those stereotypical women/girls who seem to consider it recreational. There ARE some circumstances where I get close to something that resembles enjoyment, but it's like the stars have to align right first.

My ENFp sister enjoys it more than I do, and as I trust her overall taste I've decided I'm going to try to bring her along on the next couple of trips. I figure if I simply play her mannequin I'll end up with good clothes and less stress.

(This is largely a lament based on recent trip prep, though if actual socionics discussion takes place all the better.)


Please discuss. Or console.

I can think of 3 EII friends who share your attitude, and they are so similar to each other in their shopping habits. In their cases, shopping takes them a long time because there are so many options and considerations, and it is really important to them to make the right decision. I wonder if that is true of you as well. They care a lot about quality and timelessness in clothes. They never buy anything cheap or even remotely trendy or dramatic. Every potential garment is carefully inspected and considered and then weighed against outfit wearing scenarios. They also are very frugal when they don't even really have to be. They act slightly anxious over spending money on themselves. So finding the right mix of quality, timelessness, suitability and price takes a while. (I care about that stuff too, but I want to get out of the store in a reasonable amount of time and I am not as hung up on quality and trying to figure out exactly when and where I am going to wear something.)



To me that is when an LSE comes in handy, because they value the same things, but the ones I know aren't as uptight about money (they know how much they can spend and they don't second guess themselves in the store like the EIIs.) And they somehow cut through the complicated reasoning the EII is trying to use to make the correct decisions.



Are you shopping for your trip to Prague?

[InvisibleJim]

I'm quite discriminating when it comes to purchasing my deltas.

[Kim]

I just shopped!

[willekeurig]

I absolutely hate clothes shopping. Seeing clothes in racks doesn't give me the slightest idea of how they'd look like on me, so I never know which ones to try on and end up super frustrated. I'm terrible at matching anything, too, and sometimes picking the right size can be difficult.

I have two friends (male LSE and female IEI) whose taste I trust so I usually just drag one of them to the shop with me and try whatever they tell me will look good. They're both really good. Some of my favourite clothes have been ones they had to persuade me pretty hard to try.

[Minde]

I don't know, I just go in, look for something I already have had in my mind, and walk out after obtaining it.

I try that. Sometimes it helps. Except when my head gets full of other things besides what I originally thought of. It also doesn't work if I'm not entirely sure of what I'm trying to get. Or, sometimes I'll find something that's pretty close, but I'm not sure if it really is the right choice. It seems that too often I'll buy something, and then someone comes along and says, "Did you notice that hole?" or "Those seams aren't well done" or "You could have got that for cheaper at this other place" or "That color makes your skin look weird" or "That fits you funny." Or, about 2 months after the literal point of no returns, I'll notice some of these things.

My LSE best friend loves shopping. She enjoys finding bargains and figuring out what will look good with what and stuff like that. I've always enjoyed shopping with her. She's resourceful and has a nice even level of energy. Neither hyperactive nor Eeyore.

Can I borrow her?

i think an EII i know has a shopping addiction. but i'm not close enough to her to speculate about the roots or to relate it to functions in any way. she buys a lot of things for other people; there have been a couple times we've been out together and i've made a passing remark about liking something and later in the car she's handed it to me. she also hoards a lot - her garage can't be used to park cars in. she's the only person who genuinely doesn't seem to mind the fact that i can take hourrrrs picking out clothes.

I wonder if any of it's related to indecision (or too much optimism) over what's actually usable.

[Minde]

Book shopping?? Yeah, i could spend hours at a book store browsing through the selections. priorities, ftw

Book shopping or even window shopping is a little different, yes. Because the consequences for choosing wrong are negligible.

My stress levels decrease a little when I feel any mistakes I make won't cost me too much. But since I don't have a ton of disposable income, that doesn't happen too often.

I can think of 3 EII friends who share your attitude, and they are so similar to each other in their shopping habits. In their cases, shopping takes them a long time because there are so many options and considerations, and it is really important to them to make the right decision. I wonder if that is true of you as well. They care a lot about quality and timelessness in clothes. They never buy anything cheap or even remotely trendy or dramatic. Every potential garment is carefully inspected and considered and then weighed against outfit wearing scenarios. They also are very frugal when they don't even really have to be. They act slightly anxious over spending money on themselves. So finding the right mix of quality, timelessness, suitability and price takes a while. (I care about that stuff too, but I want to get out of the store in a reasonable amount of time and I am not as hung up on quality and trying to figure out exactly when and where I am going to wear something.)

Yes, the bolded fits me.

But there's also often an aspect of sensory overload. I get the perfectionist tendencies no matter what, and when purchasing things online I'll often research them to death (thus wearing myself out). But at least with online shopping I don't have an overwhelming plethora of sights, sounds, smells, sensations trying to grab my attention and make me do things.

To me that is when an LSE comes in handy, because they value the same things, but the ones I know aren't as uptight about money (they know how much they can spend and they don't second guess themselves in the store like the EIIs.) And they somehow cut through the complicated reasoning the EII is trying to use to make the correct decisions.

Lol, yeah...

Are you shopping for your trip to Prague?

I have been recently, yes. I tend to do my clothes shopping two or three times a year, bundling it together to get it over with. My trip also corresponds roughly with my autumn/winter shopping cycle.

Still remaining: shoes for walking a lot and a jacket.

[Minde]

I just shopped!

What'd you get?

I have two friends (male LSE and female IEI) whose taste I trust so I usually just drag one of them to the shop with me and try whatever they tell me will look good. They're both really good. Some of my favourite clothes have been ones they had to persuade me pretty hard to try.

Nice. ... Can I borrow them?

[Kim]

What'd you get?

Some gym shirts for me and the quintessential SLI t-shirt.

I like shopping (but I am good about it). I only dislike shopping under pressure, such as for a job interview outfits.

[Park]

and the quintessential SLI t-shirt.

[Kim]

Yeah, you should be afraid.

[Park]

Daaayuuuuuumm guuuurl! U blazin' fast.

'frayd I am.

[Kim]

Daaayuuuuuumm guuuurl! U blazin' fast.

What's your point?

[Suz]

I have to be in the mood for clothes shopping...but when i am, i find it sort of relaxing, like meditating almost... That's why I generally like to go alone, and if i do go with a friend, we end up splitting up to clothes hunt, and then reconvene to try stuff on. But yes, I do find it exhausting, which is why i need to be in the mood. I need to be well rested, and not in a hurry, and have a nice large chunk of time (like 2-3 hours). I find it very rewarding when i find cute, comfy, nice clothes really cheap, so i generally only shop at places like Ross, Nordstrom Rack, Target, Old Navy clearance rack, etc. It's almost like a sport!

Grocery shopping is different... especially at the korean store! I feel like i'm traveling, and it's a museum of new things i can buy and try! though it is getting a little old these days...

[Beautiful sky]

I can think of 3 EII friends who share your attitude, and they are so similar to each other in their shopping habits. In their cases, shopping takes them a long time because there are so many options and considerations, and it is really important to them to make the right decision. I wonder if that is true of you as well. They care a lot about quality and timelessness in clothes. They never buy anything cheap or even remotely trendy or dramatic. Every potential garment is carefully inspected and considered and then weighed against outfit wearing scenarios. They also are very frugal when they don't even really have to be. They act slightly anxious over spending money on themselves. So finding the right mix of quality, timelessness, suitability and price takes a while. (I care about that stuff too, but I want to get out of the store in a reasonable amount of time and I am not as hung up on quality and trying to figure out exactly when and where I am going to wear something.)



To me that is when an LSE comes in handy, because they value the same things, but the ones I know aren't as uptight about money (they know how much they can spend and they don't second guess themselves in the store like the EIIs.) And they somehow cut through the complicated reasoning the EII is trying to use to make the correct decisions.



Are you shopping for your trip to Prague?

I am like that; to the point where my father's often said to me "honey, how long have you had that....[my response is 10+ years, dad]....how long do you plan on having it [more than 10 years obviously]." To which my cousin applauds me and says, "I really like that you can take care of things for so long and make things last."

For example, I'm shopping for my kitchen things; at first I purchased a cheaper set of pots and pans and I specifically checked for what I cook and what I want to cook. I've made a list of those things that I feel would need to be replaced. I'm replacing them one by one with exceptional quality cookwear, like All Clad. I just purchased an All Clad 1 1/2 quart pot, which I use often and it's of a specific quality, I checked out all of it's features, it must have a tapered edge on the top for easy pouring (which other lines of the brand do not have). If something doesn't have all the features that I've researched and find that is desirable to have, I will never buy or spend the money on the expensive brand just for the name, I will write to the company asking for what I want (I recently wrote to Apple asking for a projection system on a newer model), and I will wait patiently and do with a cheaper item until the expensive and good quality one has all the specifics I'm looking for.

I've often given my own dual cousin advice about what to purchase. For example, when I purchased my knife set, I did do a lot of detailed research. What brand I wanted, steal, where I wanted to steal to be made and how. After talking to several people, I came to buy Wusthof and Mac. My father uses Shun and Henkel. I didn't go with those lines for other reasons. But, when my cousin started shopping for her knives she went out and purchased block set after a block set, returning them after some time of trying out. When I went shopping with her I advised her to get individual pieces she liked because knife block sets are not efficient. She didn't take my advise still leaning on the aesthetics of a block set (because they matched); after reading an article that I forwarded to her about the inefficiency of the pieces in a knife set, she decided to do things the way I suggested, which was to purchase an in drawer holder (that saves counter space and clutter) and purchase each knife at a time, that way she gets the best knife for each task. What is the best knife for each task? One should have a 10" bread knife, as an example and not an 8" that is normally included in most block sets and the steal that is used in Victorinox knives are of decent quality so if you can't afford a good knife like a Mac (Japanese blade or Wusthof - the one made in Germany and not China) than you should get the Vicotrinox.

I think most things come to be by chance. I wasn't looking for the All Clad pot when I went shopping even though I knew exactly the one I wanted, or oggled over because I knew at $120, I didn't want to buy it not that I couldn't afford it. I was just looking at the things I like. The manager walked up to me and I told her my budget and she made it happen. So I walked out very thrilled.

When my sister got married, I purchased for her an entire set of a very wonderful cookwear, which she pretty much destroyed in a year or two, maybe more, I want to say 5 years

To give you a picture, I've had my computer for a long time, it's a 2007 model and it's exceptionally clean, it has a cover which has never scratched the outside; the keypad has a plastic film called a "skin" and the keys under it are spotless. I try to wash the skin often too, because you have to just like you wash your hands.

Ok, I can be quite diligent

I do shop at thrift stores too, I'm always making lists of things I would like, to see what their affordability is like. I have a few items on my list that are pricy, but if and IF I should ever come by them at a thrift store, for instance, I know exactly what I've been looking for and wanted, so I will get it without hesitation.

I follow a lot of rules for fashion. I need a lot of guidelines. This color would match that, and I research a lot online about which type of shoes would match which type of dress; specifically which patterns match what other types of patterns and fabrics too. I also don't rush to get something. I won't buy something just because it makes me feel good, or just because so I'm not impulsive.

LSE help me in shopping by matching things up fast where it would require so many many looks for me to figure out just exactly what color, style, texture I'm dealing with. They can pick the right color, right feel so quickly it makes me feel sad. But I love that my cousin loves to take me. She says "I'll take you dress shopping next weekend, I have guests today." And I'm always so happy to get the feeling of being wanted to be around. When we go shopping and I pick out something odd, she never criticizes me, she may give me the "ugly" face or wave her arm in a "no" move-on and pass-that-up gesture, but if I pick something unorthodox, she'll never criticize me and say it looks bad on me. She'll find something else she likes on me which she will compliment on, like my hair...always trying to make me feel wanted and beautiful because I'm very very critical of my beauty, my will, my energy etc.....I just think I'm such a weird looking thing (although I do try to be flirty and seductive to arouse touches from people I love -not my cousin, obviously). Um. overall, she's just faster detailed visually.

Se PoLR just means unlike Se base who can apprehend the static qualities of an object fast, like it's color texture etc, the PoLR can't. not because they are distracted by other things but because the very object they are holding in their hands is not absorbed as an object by the brain. So the static qualities are lost, they are not absorbed, the color isn't seen; I can't see that it's this shade of red, it just looks red. I used to go to school sometimes with a blue and black socks before my sister (ESE and Se demo) laughed and threw out the blue pairs so I would never get them confused again.

This is the pot that I got:

[Beautiful sky]

Oh and Iris, if I write in bold and obvious big letter's it's not because I'm being emotional it's that I can't tell whether people notice what I say...Se PoLR issues sorry I don't have a good sense of how I come off/across to others or whether they are even reading and understanding the things I write in the sense that I want them to.

[OldPathWhiteClouds]

I like to look good but I don't like clothes shopping. The whole Trunk Club idea is perfect for me.

But if I do find a need to go into a store I NEED someone to go with me. I can never make clothing decisions on my own. Or I CAN, but it take forever making a decision and even after the decision Im not certain about what I just did.

Someone mentioned book shopping.. Yes! Thats the only shopping I was made to do.

[Beautiful sky]

I like to look good but I don't like clothes shopping. The whole Trunk Club idea is perfect for me.

But if I do find a need to go into a store I NEED someone to go with me. I can never make clothing decisions on my own. Or I CAN, but it take forever making a decision and even after the decision Im not certain about what I just did.

Someone mentioned book shopping.. Yes! Thats the only shopping I was made to do.

I really love your posts. And your Se Polr couldn't be more obvious

[Beautiful sky]

And they [LSE] somehow cut through the complicated reasoning the EII is trying to use to make the correct decisions.

Ok, brace yourself. Here's the complicated reasoning behind choosing this pot that I got.

First of all the base has to be a perfect size, 8", not too small. If the base is too small it would mean that the sides would be higher, which would also mean that mixing sauces would be cumbersome and a wider base allows food to heat more evenly and I wouldn't keep stirring the contents upwards to redistribute heat evenly. The tapered sides would allow me to pour out contents easily; the stainless steal would allow me to cook things at a higher heat then coated, which only allow lower and medium heats; the coating will not peal although I will need to have a coated one handy for my saucepan oatmeal and scrambled eggs; I've already thrown away two coated ones because the coating came off and my brother isn't forgiving with pots and pans, he's already scratched the other one's coating off. The bottom of the pan must be curved as to get food scraped evenly with a spoon and not let food get stuck at the corners (this isn't a problem for most posts and pans, it is a problem for cast iron fry pans). If I spent a reasonable amount of money, I can have a piece that lasts for a long time; I shouldn't get one with poor stainless steal quality as no matter how hot you can get the pan, the food will not release, so the quality of the stainless and it's polishing must be done well. It can't be destroyed; where it's made isn't as important with this item to me. Technical stuff was a no brainer as it's one of the best quality items of the market, next to copper which is vey very very expensive and not worth the money to me, besides, I wasn't able to find the kind of measurements I wanted in the copper anyway.

My LSE cousin would say "great" at the price I paid for it but had I spent $120 she would not have liked that and would suggest I keep buying the cheaper one and not let my brother use it. Considering that I can share it with my sister and she won't be able to destroy it makes this a good buy.

[Beautiful sky]

I like to look good but I don't like clothes shopping. The whole Trunk Club idea is perfect for me.

But if I do find a need to go into a store I NEED someone to go with me. I can never make clothing decisions on my own. Or I CAN, but it take forever making a decision and even after the decision Im not certain about what I just did.

Someone mentioned book shopping.. Yes! Thats the only shopping I was made to do.

why can't they make things like this for women? If I were a man, I would wear "Confident"

[Absurd]

I try that. Sometimes it helps. Except when my head gets full of other things besides what I originally thought of. It also doesn't work if I'm not entirely sure of what I'm trying to get. Or, sometimes I'll find something that's pretty close, but I'm not sure if it really is the right choice.

It helps checking what you want to get prior to getting it, that is, checking out two or three stores and listing the things that caught your attention, and after making a decision based on criteria that you're looking for. In other words, it's time to contrast the items you want to get.

[Minde]

I like to look good but I don't like clothes shopping. The whole Trunk Club idea is perfect for me.

Wow, that site is such a great idea. Do you know if there's a similar one for women?

But if I do find a need to go into a store I NEED someone to go with me. I can never make clothing decisions on my own. Or I CAN, but it take forever making a decision and even after the decision Im not certain about what I just did.

*nods* I relate.

It helps checking what you want to get prior to getting it, that is, checking out two or three stores and listing the things that caught your attention, and after making a decision based on criteria that you're looking for. In other words, it's time to contrast the items you want to get.

You make it sound so easy. Do you make the lists and have the pictures of the items just in your head?

By the time I get through two or three stores I'm usually so exhausted that I only want to go straight home, not go back to one of them, haha.

[Absurd]

You make it sound so easy. Do you make the lists and have the pictures of the items just in your head?

More liek a mental picture after seeing some of the attire I am after that comprises the whole out of parts combined. So it is pretty in and out style of shopping for clothes shopping for me.

[willekeurig]

Nice. ... Can I borrow them?

Feel free to

[willekeurig]

i think an EII i know has a shopping addiction. but i'm not close enough to her to speculate about the roots or to relate it to functions in any way. she buys a lot of things for other people; there have been a couple times we've been out together and i've made a passing remark about liking something and later in the car she's handed it to me. she also hoards a lot - her garage can't be used to park cars in. she's the only person who genuinely doesn't seem to mind the fact that i can take hourrrrs picking out clothes.

I wonder if any of it's related to indecision (or too much optimism) over what's actually usable.

Oh boy how I struggle with this. I have waaaaay too much stuff considering that ideally I'd want to be able to fit it all in a normal/small-ish car, but throwing anything away is really damn hard because "Well you never know if there comes a Medieval French Fashion theme party, this skirt would be just perfect for that!" and "It's actually a good idea to keep the (massive) CD collection, just in case they shut the Internet down and all the electronic devices I use to store/listen to music get broken." Someone with a sense of reality, please come and do this for me.

[OldPathWhiteClouds]

why can't they make things like this for women? If I were a man, I would wear "Confident"

Wow.. you just picked my style. "Aficionado" is a bit over the top, and "Clueless" is a bit too uncoordinated for me.

Wow, that site is such a great idea. Do you know if there's a similar one for women?

So there used to be one called "CakeStyle" for women, but it didn't last. I think there's just more of a need for this type of thing with guys. Women I think are more inclined to be into shopping. Most personality types at least..

[Beautiful sky]

Wow.. you just picked my style. "Aficionado" is a bit over the top, and "Clueless" is a bit too uncoordinated for me. [/COLOR]

I figured an EII would choose that style because it's not over the top. Because it's understated, not too perceptive and showy yet classic, laid back, and inviting.

[jessica129]

I really hate it unless I just have an obscene amount of money to spend...which I never do. Even when I'm not struggling for money though, my mind cannot accept paying $50 for a shirt. I need to go shopping so bad but the thought of getting a new wardrobe exhausts me. You need new shoes to go with the outfit, a new purse, coordinating socks, the right underwear, the right colour bra....eff it I just wear dresses all summer long with a basic sandal. Although I'm stupidly happy that fall is comin up and I get to dust off my boots. Boots <3

[Skepsis]

On average, I do not like shopping for clothes, as it can take me forever to decide what I want to buy. In the end I will just grab something off the rack and go to pay for and decide that I don't want to spend that much money on it and put it back on the rack; so I often leave the store with very little to nothing. Once I settle on something, like say a favorite pair of jeans or khakis, I will just keep buying the same brand and size until the store either no longer carries them or the company stops making them, in which the process of deciding begins all over again. For the most part, I have very few clothes and I tend to wear my clothes and sneakers until they are worn out, in which my wife will talk me into going shopping for replacements. I used to avoid the mall like the plague because all of the people made me a little nervous, but that has gone away for the most part as I've aged.

[Slacker]

I do like ann and if I find something clothing-wise I like, I buy it in like three or four colors. LOL. I'm boring.

I love grocery shopping. I could do it every day. I like grocery shopping in interesting places that have interesting local foods. I love farmer's markets. I buy most of my groceries from a food co-op. I have some beautiful heirloom cherry tomatoes I got the other day calling my name right now.

What other kinds of shopping do I do? Hmm I buy too many books. I have an e-reader and I have tons of books I've bought that I want to read, and then I'll hear of another book, and I'll look to see how much it costs and I'll look for it at the library. The e-book will have a wait of like 64 people and instead of putting my name on the reserve list and reading one of the fourty-five thousand other books I want to read in the mean time, I go out and buy it so I can have it right that second. I'm wasteful.

[Absurd]

Who wants to shop with me?

[Park]

SLACKER MOM IS BACK!

[DaftPunk]

Grocery Shopping: The chore i hate the least together with cooking
Clothes Shopping: I like it more when I am abroad. Usually I have a plan what I am going to buy and I will pick not so busy hours like 10 a.m.

I like to shop specific items like a new bike or new shoes. I got as a birthday present from my friends a voucher to buy a recurve bow can't wait to buy it

[Minde]

SLACKER MOM IS BACK!

Yay!