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Thread: Living with a Quasi-Identical: ESI-SEI

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    Default Living with a Quasi-Identical: ESI-SEI

    How to distinguish between a ESI(me) and a SEI(my sister)



    • Si base vs. Si Demonstrative
      • Compared to my younger sister, I would outwardly appear to be the one who cares about creating a soothing environment and engaging with soothing activities, but this is untrue, to an extent. I do like cooking, gardening, and I clean around the house more frequently than my sister, but I like the action of doing calming activities rather than enjoying the physical sensations. Enjoying the physical sensations is a characteristic that better suits my sister. I like to plant roses, while my sister prefers to stop and smell the roses, so to speak. I can be a pretty bland cook, especially if I’m cooking for myself, because it’s not making food tasty that excites me but rather the process of cooking. My sister is the picky eater, not me. I don’t care if the food is cold or needs a little salt, but cold and flavorless food completely ruins my sister’s day.



    • My sister has an aesthetic for everything! Her bedroom, her clothes, her phone, and even the people she’s attracted to. Things must be pretty for her. In the past, as the youngest, my sister used to receive lots of hand-me-down. Wearing unfashionable, slightly worn clothes depressed her. I wore worn-down clothes too, as I am the second youngest, but this never bothered me. I’m okay with used furniture, outdated technology, and secondhand clothes as long as they “work.”



    • In terms of fashion sense, we both dress fairly well. But to be specific, I have a more classic and conservative style with hints of punk. My style has been consistent since middle school and I don’t follow trends too much. My sister, on the other hand, does pay close attention to trends. She buys clothes more frequently than me and likes to experiment with her look.



    • Providing care for others and ourselves comes naturally to us. We both own pets and provide good care for them. We are queasy people though. She is a bit more than I am; she can’t stand the sight of blood.



    • For art, I am a little more creative than her. I have liked to write ever since I was young, while my sister hasn’t really indulged into anything creative. We enjoy music in low volumes, but I can jam out sometimes. I like to dance too.



    • Fe creative vs. Fe Ignoring
      • At first glance, we both appear restrained to a stranger, but a good joke would help you discern us. My sister is friendly and loves to laugh. I most likely would not laugh and at most, give a tight smile.



    • She is far more playful and lively than me, she loves to be in merry company. She likes to tease, flirt, light-heartedly gossip, and once again, laugh. Even her resting face, she has a slight smirk that seems like she is ready to laugh at any moment. She laughs out loud and grins widely. I don’t laugh much, at least not sincerely. I often have a scared look on my face. When I do sincerely smile, it’s small as if I’m fighting it. I giggle, not laugh. I don’t gossip and I am awkward in any flirty situations.



    • Emotions appear to be contagious to my sister. If everyone is laughing and teasing, she appears to be “high” on the emotions. If others are sad, this distresses her too and she may even cry for them.



    • Neither of us are comedians or the life of the party. My sister finds it straining and becomes irritable if this role is pushed onto her. She much prefers to enjoy the lively environment another makes rather than create it herself. I often find myself being unintentionally entertaining, but I don’t purposely change the mood even when it’s tense and awkward. My sister will leave if the environment is awkward.
    Last edited by Elmira; 01-20-2023 at 02:43 PM.

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    Ni Role-Ni Mobilizing


    • Time has never been my sister’s forte. She’ll wake up extra early to reassure herself that she has plenty of time and still not organize her time wisely, and end up wasting time. Time isn’t my forte either. Deadlines and appointment times make me nervous. If I have an appointment time that day, I will not do anything but that appointment because I don’t know how long grocery takes, how traffic usually is, and if I can ‘squeeze’ in that walk because I don’t have a sense of passing time.




    • My sister never really followed a schedule, other than one provided by work and school. I, on the other hand, schedule everything. From my daily walk, my time to socialize, my breaks, and etc. I like to live every single minute planned.




    • My sister has decent punctuality; she made us late everyday of primary school when we were younger but she has gotten better over the years. I’m always on time, not early or late, and get very upset by others' tardiness.




    • Don’t ever ask my sister her future plans, she’ll take it as you’re purposefully antagonizing her or steering the conversation in a boring topic. I enjoy speaking about my future and get excited hearing people’s thoughts about how certain subjects and events are going to play out. Our future layout is similar though; very simplistic and "safe."




    • In terms of having foresight, don’t ask either of “what you think will happen?” My sister will get tensed and annoyed, while I’ll become anxious and stressed.



    Te PoLR-Te Suggestive



    • Don’t ever evaluate or criticize my sister’s work. If someone comments “I think it would be better/quicker/easier…,” she’ll get extremely upset and storm off, ceasing contact with that person for a very long time. I, on the other hand, actively seek an evaluation. I might present a brief outline of a project and inwardly hope someone points out if what I plan to do is realistic or beneficial. Sometimes I’ll even hope that the person advise me on the execution of my project too. I will get really disheartened if I don’t receive this information, and even hypocritically think the other person is useless.




    • When we share work together, our work quickly becomes my work. My sister doesn’t like to work. She often tells me that she wishes that she could find someone that loves her so much and will “rescue” her from working. She will gladly leave her task, even if she half way completed it, if she discovers there is someone who is willing to carry her load. When she does do work, she takes lots of breaks, making a 3-hour job into a 10-hour job. To me, life without work sounds unimaginable, but work often is stressful to me. I often feel clumsy and incompetent with tasks; I never know how to evaluate my capabilities and how to correctly approach tasks. So I prefer to work in private because I don’t want to be embarrassed by my clumsy approach to tasks.




    • “Is this a deal,” “Is this product worth the price,” “Is this product of quality,” and many similar questions tend to pop up in my mind frequently. When I have to make a big purchase and sometimes even grocery shopping, it takes forever as I’m constantly asking these questions in my head. My sister doesn’t seem to have these thoughts and if I voice these questions to her, she will get annoyed and might even suck her teeth, thinking I’m purposely irritating her.
    Last edited by Elmira; 01-30-2023 at 08:43 PM.

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    I'm curious, I have one question. How do both of you relate to sweets (candy, cupcakes, pies, jellybeans, etc)? Also, fruits?
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    I'm curious, I have one question. How do both of you relate to sweets (candy, cupcakes, pies, jellybeans, etc)? Also, fruits?
    Do you want a serious answer to that question?

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    How about Se? And Fi?
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    Do you want a serious answer to that question?
    Yes (if possible).
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Beautiful sky View Post
    How about Se? And Fi?
    Haven't wrote it yet.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    Yes (if possible).
    My sister likes pastries, but isn't crazy over candies. She claims that candies are too artificial tasting. She like fruits, but is picky about how fruit is served or presented.

    I don't care for sweets, but if I'm hungry with no other option or in celebratory scenario, I will eat it without complaint. I like fruits, more so than anyone I've met so far.

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    Ne Suggestive-Ne PoLR

    • My sister’s face lights up when the topic of “what could be” occurs. She likes when people share the potential of her talents, of others’, and items. I, on the other hand, find these topics boring and respond curtly, if I even engage. I prefer to focus on “what is” or “what will be.”
    • She enjoys having multiple options in all parts of life, but has a difficult time seeing options herself. If one randomly ask, “have any ideas what we should do today,” she’ll react with a puzzled and panicked look. I have struggles with brainstorming too, but in an oppositional way. Too many options freak me out. I get frustrated by ‘excessive’ fantasizing, even if I end up short cutting myself by hastily deciding on a less fortunate choice.
    • My sister frequently daydreams, but her daydreams seem repetitive and ‘grounded.’ I don’t daydream much, but if I do, my daydreams are unusual.
    • Anything ambiguous and sudden changes brings me distress; I avoid this as much as possible. My sisters enjoys surprises. When someone randomly switches plans in outgoings, like choosing a different restaurant than one planned, this seems to please my sister very much.


    Ti Mobilizing-Ti Role

    • Rather than explain my thought process and understanding of a topic, I would prefer to just send the person the original source of the information, indirectly stating “learn it yourself.” But this is out of insecurity that I’m overestimating my knowledge on the topic. My sister seems to share a similar sentiment. She evades situations that involve presenting her comprehension of topics.
    • My sister is academically inclined; she seems to absorb other explanations of topics, so school is on the easier side for her. I’m decent at school. School is exhaustive and does not come naturally to me.
    • Outwardly I appear to be very interested in theories and academics, but this is out of ambition rather than sincere interest. My sister outwardly won’t appear to be interested; she doesn’t read at all and she doesn’t seek higher education, but if someone starts explaining a theory or a similar topic, she enthusiastically listens and asks questions.
    • I have a reputation for being a hypocrite. I’ll say a statement and another will take this as a “rule” for myself, so when I behave outside of this “rule,” I get called a hypocrite. If someone points out this inconsistency, I’m confused and feel as if they’re playing a “gotcha” game that I didn’t know or care to be a part of. My sister hates to be outed for any inaccuracy between her words and her actions. My sister tries her best to maintain logical consistency, so when she is faced that she has made a mistake, this pains her.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    My sister likes pastries, but isn't crazy over candies. She claims that candies are too artificial tasting. She like fruits, but is picky about how fruit is served or presented.

    I don't care for sweets, but if I'm hungry with no other option or in celebratory scenario, I will eat it without complaint. I like fruits, more so than anyone I've met so far.
    Is your sister SEI-Si or SEI-Fe (If imagining her as animal, she is a monkey; then she is SEI-Si, if a rabbit; she is SEI-Fe) ?
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    By contrast to your Ne I scan the news every morning for new ideas, new news, new information, new and interesting happenings, new health articles, new recipes, new science discoveries…and I speak about them to whomever I can share the information with, mostly hubs
    @Wavebury proof is in the pudding and not in your head
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    Is your sister SEI-Si or SEI-Fe (If imagining her as animal, she is a monkey; then she is SEI-Si, if a rabbit; she is SEI-Fe) ?
    My sister is a SEI-Fe.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    Is your sister SEI-Si or SEI-Fe (If imagining her as animal, she is a monkey; then she is SEI-Si, if a rabbit; she is SEI-Fe) ?
    …. What? LOL
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    Quote Originally Posted by End View Post
    get ready to get cucked
    Quote Originally Posted by roger557 View Post
    got this Socionics stuff caught by the balls

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    Too many options freak me out. I get frustrated by ‘excessive’ fantasizing, even if I end up short cutting myself by hastily deciding on a less fortunate choice.
    Why? Is it because too many options seems like a “scam”? Or feeling exhausted at the thought of having to evaluate all of them?
    how to enlarge your dragon, click here

    Quote Originally Posted by End View Post
    get ready to get cucked
    Quote Originally Posted by roger557 View Post
    got this Socionics stuff caught by the balls

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    I most likely would not laugh and at most, give a tight smile.


    • She is far more playful and lively than me, she loves to be in merry company. She likes to tease, flirt, light-heartedly gossip, and once again, laugh. Even her resting face, she has a slight smirk that seems like she is ready to laugh at any moment. She laughs out loud and grins widely. I don’t laugh much, at least not sincerely. I often have a scared look on my face. When I do sincerely smile, it’s small as if I’m fighting it. I giggle, not laugh. I don’t gossip and I am awkward in any flirty situations.
    You’re a female right? Do you have depression or autism or has something happened to you to make you have a more sombre vibe? Most of the female ESIs I know seem a bit more smiley than this sounds. The only female ESI I know like this was adopted, and had to undergo some hardship in her younger life.
    how to enlarge your dragon, click here

    Quote Originally Posted by End View Post
    get ready to get cucked
    Quote Originally Posted by roger557 View Post
    got this Socionics stuff caught by the balls

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    Quote Originally Posted by simpin is pimpin View Post
    Why? Is it because too many options seems like a “scam”? Or feeling exhausted at the thought of having to evaluate all of them?
    Yes, having to evaluate all of them is tiring. I also don't like the state of inaction it requires me to be in.

    You’re a female right? Do you have depression or autism or has something happened to you to make you have a more sombre vibe? Most of the female ESIs I know seem a bit more smiley than this sounds. The only female ESI I know like this was adopted, and had to undergo some hardship in her younger life.
    I do smile as it's polite and courteous to do so. My somber impression only comes out with closeness, as this is when I become more sincere with my emotional expression.

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    I guess it depends on the ESI-Se. I had a female ESI-Se in childhood that was quite animated, but I've met others (most notably Jodie Foster, who I once saw at an hotel in the Maldives where I stayed when I was a child) who don't seem as animated. I guess it depends on other factors.

    Elmira, do you know your enneagram type/trifix?
    Last edited by lavos; 02-01-2023 at 09:44 PM.
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    Ni Role-Ni Mobilizing


    • Time has never been my sister’s forte. She’ll wake up extra early to reassure herself that she has plenty of time and still not organize her time wisely, and end up wasting time. Time isn’t my forte either. Deadlines and appointment times make me nervous. If I have an appointment time that day, I will not do anything but that appointment because I don’t know how long grocery takes, how traffic usually is, and if I can ‘squeeze’ in that walk because I don’t have a sense of passing time.




    • My sister never really followed a schedule, other than one provided by work and school. I, on the other hand, schedule everything. From my daily walk, my time to socialize, my breaks, and etc. I like to live every single minute planned.




    • My sister has decent punctuality; she made us late everyday of primary school when we were younger but she has gotten better over the years. I’m always on time, not early or late, and get very upset by others' tardiness.




    • Don’t ever ask my sister her future plans, she’ll take it as you’re purposefully antagonizing her or steering the conversation in a boring topic. I enjoy speaking about my future and get excited hearing people’s thoughts about how certain subjects and events are going to play out. Our future layout is similar though; very simplistic and "safe."




    • In terms of having foresight, don’t ask either of “what you think will happen?” My sister will get tensed and annoyed, while I’ll become anxious and stressed.



    Te PoLR-Te Suggestive



    • Don’t ever evaluate or criticize my sister’s work. If someone comments “I think it would be better/quicker/easier…,” she’ll get extremely upset and storm off, ceasing contact with that person for a very long time. I, on the other hand, actively seek an evaluation. I might present a brief outline of a project and inwardly hope someone points out if what I plan to do is realistic or beneficial. Sometimes I’ll even hope that the person advise me on the execution of my project too. I will get really disheartened if I don’t receive this information, and even hypocritically think the other person is useless.




    • When we share work together, our work quickly becomes my work. My sister doesn’t like to work. She often tells me that she wishes that she could find someone that loves her so much and will “rescue” her from working. She will gladly leave her task, even if she half way completed it, if she discovers there is someone who is willing to carry her load. When she does do work, she takes lots of breaks, making a 3-hour job into a 10-hour job. To me, life without work sounds unimaginable, but work often is stressful to me. I often feel clumsy and incompetent with tasks; I never know how to evaluate my capabilities and how to correctly approach tasks. So I prefer to work in private because I don’t want to be embarrassed by my clumsy approach to tasks.




    • “Is this a deal,” “Is this product worth the price,” “Is this product of quality,” and many similar questions tend to pop up in my mind frequently. When I have to make a big purchase and sometimes even grocery shopping, it takes forever as I’m constantly asking these questions in my head. My sister doesn’t seem to have these thoughts and if I voice these questions to her, she will get annoyed and might even suck her teeth, thinking I’m purposely irritating her.
    What you wrote about Ni is pretty much based on a lot of stereotypes about what Ni means and just that Si base types role out Ni would mean that they show off their Ni because they have Si base. Ni would be the internal manipulation of patterns and possibilities or ideas. Like imagining or deforming a subject of an idea into many possibilities. The best way to explain Ni is also to say for instance Putin is going to blow us up with Nuclear weapons and the mind taking that even and creating a world of post nuclear apocalypse that vision that transpires out of an even so to say. It occurred in the mind. Would you please ask your sister “if I say Putin will use a nuclear weapon!” What do you envision and see out of that image?
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 02-01-2023 at 10:12 PM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    I’ll give you a real example from an ILI on how they see events.

    So Azerbaijan is now at war with Armenia and my ILI mom is Armenian. She says why does America support a nation that Russia is ally’s with? They are supporting a nation that is ally’s with Russia when Russia is at war in Ukraine.

    As in don’t support the friend of an enemy!

    She watches these events going on in the world and makes estimations of what is happening and speaks about these events often with a moral tinge like “it’s wrong what they are doing while people are the ones suffering”
    Because Ni is perception of the fluid world and events; it watches the state of the world change.

    I asked my mother to tell me what she sees

    “What do you see when I say Putin is going to drop a bomb on us?”
    Mom ILI: I don’t have any feelings. I just see a desolate world with no humans. After I have this vision then I form a feeling. Now I see that this is very bad. But my enemy will die so that makes me glad.

    I’m EII. If you ask me the same I will have intense and terrifying feelings and would imagine myself rushing to hold my love in my arms.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 02-01-2023 at 10:24 PM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    The reason why Ni stresses you out is because of your introverted feelings function is a subject that is subjectively influenced by the events that you imagine from within and from external events. If is a feeling subject that truly experiences feelings deeply so that experience stresses you out. I don’t know if your sister too gets stressed out as you and I would since we have Fi unless you ask her. Maybe their let live attitude and you can’t influence what happens let’s them not personally feel or associate feelings to the stressful events.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    My sister is a SEI-Fe.
    I can't wait for the Fi/Se
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    I guess it depends on the ESI-Se. I had a female ESI-Se in childhood that was quite animated, but I've met others (most notably Jodie Foster, who I once saw at an hotel in the Maldives where I stayed when I was a child) who don't seem as animated. I guess it depends on other factors.

    Elmira, do you know your enneagram type/trifix?
    684, sx/sp.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Beautiful sky View Post
    What you wrote about Ni is pretty much based on a lot of stereotypes about what Ni means and just that Si base types role out Ni would mean that they show off their Ni because they have Si base. Ni would be the internal manipulation of patterns and possibilities or ideas. Like imagining or deforming a subject of an idea into many possibilities. The best way to explain Ni is also to say for instance Putin is going to blow us up with Nuclear weapons and the mind taking that even and creating a world of post nuclear apocalypse that vision that transpires out of an even so to say. It occurred in the mind. Would you please ask your sister “if I say Putin will use a nuclear weapon!” What do you envision and see out of that image?
    The reason why Ni stresses you out is because of your introverted feelings function is a subject that is subjectively influenced by the events that you imagine from within and from external events. If is a feeling subject that truly experiences feelings deeply so that experience stresses you out. I don’t know if your sister too gets stressed out as you and I would since we have Fi unless you ask her. Maybe their let live attitude and you can’t influence what happens let’s them not personally feel or associate feelings to the stressful events.
    I'm confused. I got that what I was relating behaviorally to Ni, isn't Ni. So I don't get the further analysis on how my Fi affects my Ni...because isn't what I said, invalid now?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    684, sx/sp.
    6w5 or 6w7 (important distinction).
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    I'm confused. I got that what I was relating behaviorally to Ni, isn't Ni. So I don't get the further analysis on how my Fi affects my Ni...because isn't what I said, invalid now?
    It is Ni, but Ni is more things.
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    6w5 or 6w7 (important distinction).
    6w5.

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    Se Ignoring-Se Creative


    • On first impressions, people respond intensely to my presence. Even though I don’t behave anyway that calls for others’ focus, people still notice and remember me without me even interacting with them. My sister does not stick out like I do, but once people acquaint her, people develop a positive impression of her.



    • My sister rarely gets herself in a serious argument. I have only ever heard her once raise her voice. She avoids conflict and high-pressure environments. Any discipline as a child, even if it were a gentle scolding, would bring her to tears and sometimes make her faint. I am not conflict-seeking, but I am not conflict-avoidant either. I tend to think that most problems can be solved by direct confrontation and beating around the bush prolongs the issue. As a child, I was the most obedient, but I also had the worst temper. If my mind was set, even harsh disciplining did not change my behavior.



    • My sister hates a competitive environment. She does not like it when she is playing with friends/family and others start to focus on winning by making tactics, trash-talking, and shortcutting others. My sister becomes fatigued just being near this environment, even if she is not directly engaging with it. I tend to be relaxed in a cutthroat environment and might even be amused by it, but if I notice that too many people are getting discomforted, I will tell the competitive people to “cool off,” sacrificing my own comfort as I become tense in a very laidback environment.



    • I can work for prolonged periods of time, while my sister fatigues easily. I will pull all-nighters to finish a task, but my sister has never pulled an all-nighter or had a short night. If she fails to finish the work, so be it; she needs her “beauty sleep.”



    • I am very individualistic. I might outwardly support “all for one, one for all” but inwardly, I align more with “everyone for themselves.” My sister calls herself an “individualistic team player.” She will not seek out to work on her own and will be compliant with the team efforts, but she will focus on reaping the benefits from the joint team efforts for herself.



    • My sister does not adhere to other’s demands. If someone tries to tyrannize her, she ignores their pressure and behaves as if that individual does not exist. If the person persists, she will take revenge to get the person to back off.



    • I have a “tough love” mentality. If someone is bothering a friend or family member, I am more likely to recommend that they stand up for themselves rather than speaking for them, even if that individual wants me to stand up for them. I consider this too encroaching on others’ lives and too bothersome for myself. My sister would not stand up for many either. She will comfort that person, but at the end of the day, she considers that person’s issues “their problem” and will not make it her own.




    • I am a persistent person. A step back does not intimidate me. I will just recognize that the tactic didn't work and approach the goal in a different manner. Quitting is rarely an option for me. If my sister faces a failure, she decided that the goal she had in mine was not the path for her and seeks the one that is 'natural' to her.




    • If I am stunk in unfortunate circumstances, I don't adapt a "woe me" mindset, rather I tend to 'endure' my sufferings/pain. I would consider the unfavorable situation as a consequence for my lack of capability and foresight. I would save face and might never seek help or, in my eyes, "whine." My sister is the whiner and it usually works in her favor. She plays the "damsel in distress" very well and constantly has people that wants to protect her and rid of any source of stress for her. She think "if she can find an easy way out of misery, why endure?"




    Fi Demonstrative-Fi Base


    • My sister is a charming person; she is never short of admirers and befriends others easily. She is always socializing and likes to be around friends. Even if she is in a new place, it will not be long till she has made friends. She can be considered a social butterfly. If she is a social butterfly, I am a drifter. I have never had a friend group. Instead, I socialize with select individuals from different friend groups. I prefer to spend most of my time alone. I normally go multiple days without speaking.



    • Each relation I have is interesting and distinctive; my relationships’ dynamics with others do not resemble one another. I had others describe my relations with others as “movie-like” and like hearing me recount about them. My sister’s friendships are sweet. They exchange heartwarming gifts on birthdays, warmly celebrate each other’s wins, and there are lots of hugs, but her friends’ dynamics are terribly similar. I can never distinguish who she is talking about when she recounts her interactions with others as the person whose she speaks of can be easily exchanged with everyone she knows.



    • I tend to minimize regular interactions, like daily texting and ‘chilling’ with others, but maximize the longevity of friendships. My sister does the opposite; she maximizes regular interactions and minimizes the longevity of friendships. Her friendships come with expiration dates.



    • My sister “getting to know you” stage is very quick. As soon as she learns there is a shared interest or she just finds the other person amusing, that individual is quickly acquainted, and she interacts with that person like a close friend. I can speak with another for weeks on end and still behave very distantly with that individual. If friendships were like universities, my sister would have an 85% acceptance rate, I would have 3% acceptance rate with only less than 1% receiving acceptance on their first attempt.



    • My sister does not deal with rifts in friendships; she breaks off interactions with that individual and even might consider them as “difficult.” I hardly take others’ tempers, attitudes, or mood swings personally, so I tend to wait out any difficulties in a relationship, which gives others the impression of me being a ‘loyal’ person.



    • My sister has very shifting impressions on individuals. One day she will enthusiastically share “he’s so smart, funny, and he’s the Yang to my Yin,” then two days later, she sighs and angrily mutter “why are you asking me about him? He is lame and he is so annoying.” There is no one that escapes this shifting attitude, not friends or family. In some ways, others will negatively state that she is unreliable, but others will positively state that she is forgiving. My impression does not shift much. If I admire someone or find an individual impressive, my sentiments will not change much, even with distance and time. But on the other hand, if I have negative sentiments about an individual, this will not change with distance or time either. So those with positive impressions of me tend to consider me sincere, while those who do not will consider me to be someone that holds grudges.



    • Vividly, I recount the way people have treated me and their attitudes towards me. I do my best to repay back those who have done good to me and can relate to phrases like “paying back tenfold” or “returning a drop of water with a fountain.” For those who wronged me, I distance myself as much as possible from that person, and no matter how much time has passed, I do not dare try to forgive them. Even if that person genuinely changes, I will want nothing to do with them. My sister is accurately described with the phrase “people quickly forget what you’ve done for them.” Without thinking, she will forget those who have given her money when they did not much themselves, how others comforted her when she was down, and those who defended her in times when it would have been difficult to. She easily gets caught up by novelty in the face of new individuals. She is also easily swayed if her friends go through life’s adversities and leaves them behind quickly in search for “her peace of mind.” But she easily forgives. An individual that has betrayed or hurt is forgiven if they can promise a fun time.



    • People’s relations or impressions of others/objects are transparent to me. My sister often calls me “the old man in the mountains” for my wisdom and bird-eye view on others. People constantly use me as an advisor for their relationships. My sister seems to be aware of other’s sentiments as she easily evades others’ ‘touchy’ topics and in her jokes, she always draws back at the correct moment.



    • My sister becomes the people who she speaks to; it’s the way she bonds with others. She’s very influenced by those she speaks to. But she switches her group every few months, so her demeanor is constantly changing. I prefer friendships that encourage autonomy. I’m not too concerned about straining the relationship by pointing out our differences. In my eyes, if the friendship can’t survive unless we ‘herd’ mind ourselves, then let it die. This might give the impression that I am an avoidant person as it will appear to the other person as if I become close to them and suddenly went cold, but really, I decided to the friendship to “die,” so to speak.


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    This confirms that my dad was ESI not SEE. I thought initially he maybe SEE but I think him and mom (ILI) were activity relationship.

    Thank you for shedding some inner light into an ESI
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    @kuno what do you think does this seal it for you as an SEI?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    684, sx/sp.
    It makes sense that you’re sx 684. You have the same vibe as my father, who is another sx 6. Very intense and commanding presence. He’s an LSI, though.

    You’ve compiled a wonderful “log” of differences between ESI and SEI! Thank you for this; I’m sure you must enjoy socionics a good amount.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Beautiful sky View Post
    @kuno what do you think does this seal it for you as an SEI?
    Yeah, the sister sounds just like me LOL, although perhaps she’s more outgoing than me. She’s definitely SEI-Fe; I’ve always related more to SEI-Si, though the Sociotype.com test also scored me as SEI-Fe

    This is the one thing where I very much don’t relate to the SEI sister:
    I tend to minimize regular interactions, like daily texting and ‘chilling’ with others, but maximize the longevity of friendships. My sister does the opposite; she maximizes regular interactions and minimizes the longevity of friendships. Her friendships come with expiration dates.
    I also maximize regular interactions like the sister does, but I also generally try to maximize the longevity of friendships—though if a friendship can’t be carried on any longer, I don’t fuss over it. You can’t force friendship. But I prefer to keep all my close friendships alive.

    Also, this:
    I can work for prolonged periods of time, while my sister fatigues easily. I will pull all-nighters to finish a task, but my sister has never pulled an all-nighter or had a short night. If she fails to finish the work, so be it; she needs her “beauty sleep.”
    I can also work for prolonged periods of time and I’m well-known for doing this. However, it depends on what the task is, because having to sacrifice rest for a task is actually very stressful to me, more stressful than it is for any of my friends (I think most of my friends are intuitive). If I judge the task to be important enough, I’ll suck it up and bear it, but I’ll probably want to cry on the inside lol.

    The descriptions of Fe creative, Ti mobilizing, and Ni role also resonated with me a lot. I also related to the Si base description, though I personally don’t follow fashion trends; I just try to pick out my own aesthetic, my own style.

    Thanks for mentioning me here! You’ve been very helpful so far

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    @Elmira , To be honest, I have been trying for you to use your HA to check if you really are ESI, but the impression I get is that, despite having have great capability to simulate, compare, and describe daily happenings, you do not have +Ni/-Ne Ha. This was deduced from the way you quickly say things "are" something and how certain you assert so ("SEI-Fe", "6w5" etc). It is either: insecurity as feigned security, or you genuinely know these things with ease (which would make you not have +Ne/-Ni PoLR, and means you are not ESI--most likely LSI-Se).

    Btw, are you the one quoting me and later deleting posts?
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    @Elmira , To be honest, I have been trying for you to use your HA to check if you really are ESI, but the impression I get is that, despite having have great capability to simulate, compare, and describe daily happenings, you do not have +Ni/-Ne Ha. This was deduced from the way you quickly say things "are" something and how certain you assert so ("SEI-Fe", "6w5" etc). It is either: insecurity as feigned security, or you genuinely know these things with ease (which would make you not have +Ne/-Ni PoLR, and means you are not ESI--most likely LSI-Se).



    Btw, are you the one quoting me and later deleting posts?
    nah she values Fi
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    https://youtu.be/pB4si1DWJ5g


    My sister shared this video with me and said it's our dynamic.

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    I'm not buying that you're ESI.
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by lavos View Post
    I'm not buying that you're ESI.
    >50% can mistake in own types. In types of other people - the similar.
    So can be or not to be.

    If for @Elmira is important that for other people was more clear what type she has, then may make a typing theme with 10 min video (free tale about herself, good seen face, without glasses).
    I'd watched with an interest.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elmira View Post
    https://youtu.be/pB4si1DWJ5g


    My sister shared this video with me and said it's our dynamic.
    Me and my sis too

    Maybe except that she works very hard + I would shout at her " GO " in the end when she repeats that she's leaving so many times instead of just waving to her with my hand to say goodbye
    Souls know their way back home

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sol View Post
    >50% can mistake in own types. In types of other people - the similar.
    So can be or not to be.

    Regarding Gamma selftypings, that percentage is more like 90%(in this forum-- dunno how it is the russian community, whether this a global phenomenon)
    If for @Elmira is important that for other people was more clear what type she has, then may make a typing theme with 10 min video (free tale about herself, good seen face, without glasses).
    I'd watched with an interest.
    Then, the angel asked her what her name was. She said: "I have none"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sol View Post
    >50% can mistake in own types. In types of other people - the similar.
    So can be or not to be.

    If for @Elmira is important that for other people was more clear what type she has, then may make a typing theme with 10 min video (free tale about herself, good seen face, without glasses).
    I'd watched with an interest.
    She’s ESI
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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