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Thread: pathological dual-seeking

  1. #1
    reyn_til_runa's Avatar
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    Feb 2006
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    Default pathological dual-seeking

    What might cause a person to repeatedly end up attracting people who possess the dual-seeking function to a pathological degree?

    I am, for the moment, assuming I am INTp.

    I dated an ESFp with borderline personality disorder. Long before I started thinking of our relationship in terms of socionics, I knew that we would never have a problem with sex. In fact, we still get together for sex. In that department, his controlling nature works perfectly. But outside the bedroom, the Se was out of control. He is almost universally known as an asshole, yet to me has always been a tender asshole.

    We are still drawn to each other, and I have thought many times that if only he knew how to compartmentalize his manipulation and forcefulness, we'd be great together.

    It happened with my most recent boss (ESFx?) too. She is a controlling person who was fired for her inappropriate actions and lack of profressionalism. Yet, the disturbing part is that I, as assistant manager under her, seemed to attract the worst of her instability and control. I was feeding her cat for awhile. Once when I told her I would no longer be able to do so, she left me harrassing messages, saying things like "You love cats....I know you do....As a human being, please, you at least owe me an explanation. I cannot go on wondering why you are doing this to me....I am an emotional mess...." Blech. I can't stand people who are emotionally manipulative. She was that AND a micromanager. Deal-breaker.

    So, how does one avoid attracting the dual function^n?
    whenever the dog and i see each other we both stop where we are. we regard each other with a mixture of sadness and suspicion and then we feign indifference.

    Jerry, The Zoo Story by Edward Albee

  2. #2
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    Oct 2005
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    I've been thinking about this for a while. The answer is to invoke the heroic attitude, which I suspect has evolved for the specific purpose of neutralizing pathlogical elements.

    Listen, if pathological types aren't evil, then who is? Clearly evil people exist in the world. I might be inclined to say borderlines are less evil than sociopaths/pathological ISTPs... but I'm not a feeler and I understand that evil is very much a subjective affair. Certainly these people do not like for conscious awareness to be shared between their friends: they are obviously not aware of themselves.

    You're going to have to make this person feel like some kind of throwback from the dark-ages. (which they are) Psychopathology is a genetic legacy passed down from our ancestral past, when the world was savage and only the fittest survived, the age before morality evolved in our consciousness.

    The reason these people are pathological is because they are completely dominated by their subconscious. This tale actually reminds me of a scene from Valkyrie Profile, in which case a pathological type (portrayed as an undead witch) explained another woman's "feelings" on her behalf, saying she was wicked woman who used men to escape her own insecurities. Perhaps this is true from a vantagepoint... and perhaps it's just perversion pure and simple. These people seem to employ what's called the reverse transcendental function: the ability to shut off the subconscious' genetic mastery over their psyche on the subconscious' behalf. They masquerade as "normal people" and try to drown us in a Matrix-like psuedo-reality; they make us lose track of who we are and what we really believe. If we are divided then they can undo the progress consciousness has wrought for us, and return us and the rest of humanity to the unconscious realm of apparent oblivion from which we evolved. This is their ultimate goal, and for this very reason we must always be on guard against them.

    It's Us against Them. Just remember that we, the healthy people of the world, are on your side. Reach inside your heart, and find the strength to overcome. At moment, you'll know what to do.

    (on a side note, I would love to have an indepth discussion on what the existence of the reverse transcendental function means to our understanding of psychology.)

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