LSIs/ISTjs interpreting calm demeanor as refusal to acknowledge problem

[ataronchronon]

Thinking back... I now realize that my dad is an ISTj. I did the same thing to him too, except he was more angry than my roommate. Eventually it got to a point where I couldn't live with him anymore, so I moved in with my mom. hm.

[UDP]

You cannot just run away from these situations

[Creepy-bg]

You cannot just run away from these situations

sure you can. Running is much easier than staying to do battle and fighting it out just isn't worth it in alot of circumstances. If somebody wants to be an angry dick why not just let them and move on with your life?

[UDP]

You need to learn how to deal with these problems face to face at some point, otherwise you will be the victim and, by default, bail out in all such situations - whether or not really ought to.

Robesp'er feels itself defenseless in the situation of sudden volitional pressure. In this case it for itself frequently unexpectedly manifests the "unpardonable pliability", which it subsequently analyzes, trying to hence be farsighted and not to repeat similar errors.

Robesp'er fears tax occasion for the volitional action on itself; therefore sometimes it attempts to appear by man without the weaknesses ("iron Felix"). It does not love, when they play on its weaknesses. Suffer whimperers it cannot, it does not make it possible to pity itself (it does not love cheap ethical it is special effect). Never it makes possible for itself to manifest force with respect to the weak.

http://the16types.info/forums/viewtopic.php?t=8966


What do you suggest, that he run away forever?

PS: Or wait for his dual? You cannot run away all the time, and you cannot expect other people to help you or stand up for you.
What if his friends were on his roommate's side? What if he gets shipped to another part of the world and lives in another room mate situation, and runs into the same sort of problem there? You have to learn how to deal with it on your own.

[Creepy-bg]

that description sucks (as far as translations go)... I'm not saying that he run for the rest of his life. Learn the type of person that you get into those situations with and stay away from them. That doesn't mean you've got to avoid them alltogether but at the very least stop trying to live with them. Learn from you're mistakes to avoid making them over and over. There's nothing wrong with battling it out, if that's what you're into, but it sounds like he isn't... so I suggested a positive way to view "running away". It's all a matter of perspective, life is what you make of it... and all that nonsense.

[mr_maguoo]

Wow, reading this thread I must really be lucky then. Every LSI I know has been like Al Bundy, funny, laid back, reasonable, intelligent, ok perhaps not selfish or self serving, but normal people that can be reasoned with and are fun to hang out with. The ones described in this thread seem disturbed and to be honest I normally run away from the type of people that are described in this thread. They seem like they need fixing. Which is something I don't do (Unless I want to do it of course)

I agree, some of the interpretations on this thread are completely wrong. I certainly don't identify with the 'dictator'. While there are some unhealthy ISTjs it would be wrong to assume that ALL ISTjs are unhealthy. Some of the ISTjs typed here do appear to have problems, but some types just misunderstand ISTjs generally.

For example that 'pushing in the chair' scenario. Its not about CONTROL, as the INFj perceives it, but rather about DUTY. An ISTj would only tell you to do it simply because if they were in your place, they would do it (and wouldn't need reminding). An ISTj reminds you, not to criticise, but rather to help make you a better person, who doesn't fail in their duties. ISTjs don't fail in their duties, and pushing in a chair is a duty owed to your fellow housemates. It's important to be considerate to others living in the same house.

ENFjs understand this, their responsibility to others is always there, and ISTj's recognise and appreciate this quality. That's why their dual would 'push in the chair' without a second thought, and if the ENFj forgot to do this once or twice, the ISTj would do it because the ISTj knows that the ENFj doesn't fail in their duties, they probably forgot in this instance rather than simply decide not to do it, as an ENFp does constantly. Or the ENFj helps in other ways, such as being the financial provider, and the ISTj is the domestic provider, and therefore its the ISTj's duty to make sure the chair is tucked in. There's no other type more selfless than the ENFj, they are truely remarkable people who ask for little in return. And who should look after this selfless person? Why it's the ISTj of course, who will never fail to look after the deserving ENFj. He'll make sure that the ENFJ get's her fair share.

And ISTjs do criticise themselves, they just do it privately. If they think they are right all the time its because of their heightened ability to grasp details and sense 'what is', as they do this better than most types. If they tend to fall into the habit of thinking they're always right, its because they appreciate and sense objective facts better than most types, so they can get into the habit of thinking that because of their appreciation and understanding of the facts of a given situation, their view is the objective one and cannot be wrong. Although if new facts come into play, healthy ISTjs will and do apologise for their mistakes.