ENFPs and conflict

[Dioklecian]

Here is an example of how an ENFP somehow has antagonized the other contestants in her game (the ENFP is the Indian celebrity). How does that work? I think I have a little bit of that too:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/TV/0...eut/index.html

[mikemex]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZBfNdUHTMVQ
http://youtube.com/watch?v=DyvZWoQ39wM

The other girl seems a Se type, most likely ESTp. I can recognize that behaviour very well because I used to have arguments with such people when I was younger.

Se types are strategists and want to win over others at all costs. They know very well how to measure the strength and danger level of other people and their own. For that reason they are likely to avoid 1:1 fights with people like ENFp, because even if the ENFp seems friendly and harmless, it is a sharp psychologist who can intuitively guess profund weaknesses in the oppononent. The ENFp generally uses that information to help others, but under stress it can be used as a weapon. For example, uncovering the opponet by showing others how miserable they are really, despite their apparent gentleness.

The strategy of such persons is to weaken the opponent from distance, which is generally done by ridiculizing them with other people like it is shown in the video. By doing so they ensure that the opponent gradually loses support, with the aim of gaining it themselves. In the end, they want to build a pack of followers to ensure that in an open confrontation they will win. It's not unlike a pack of wolves isolating the victim from the group and attacking it from all sides later.

But why do ENFp and people like that get in trouble in the first place?

ENFp are natural leaders (Se role) and try to gain a privileged position within a group. I am inclined to say that this is even done subconciously. ESTp and ENFp leadership styles are very different, though.

ESTp tries to get submission and resorts to intimidation measures and such. To make it short, his power is at the expense of others.

ENFp, on the contrary, are charismatic leaders. They like to support and lift others whenever possible, with the purpose of gaining people's steem.

ESTp have natural followers, but I think ENFp will always get on top first. Since they are in power and are well liked, they trigger competition, because NF leaddership style is opposite to ST. ST style is somewhat selfish.

Power struggles will always be heated. That's the origin of all evil in the world.

[meatburger]

Mike you Certianlly like to blow the ENFp horn....

If an ESTp was abusing me directly to my face etc in front of others i would very likely loose to their Se unless i was in a strange mood. Their Se would sense that im weak at abusing people etc and pile drive me.

I agree if i dont like someone i will foster support of as many people as i can and slowly deminish their power. It does work extremely well but its more of a covert style.

As a leader i dunno. I do have some leadership qualities but i dont actually like to take the lead very often. Its like a covert thing again. ESTp's do often like to take charge and really they are loads better at it than me.

[.thursday]

she needs to eat some humble pie

[mikemex]

I recommend you watching the movie "The Mission". It shows very well how both interact (those are fictional characters, though, so it seems closer to INFj than ENFp to me).

For example:

(Being in prison after killing his own brother and feeling extremely guilty about it)

"Are you laughing at me!? Are you laughing...at... me!!!!????"
"Yes, I do. I do because what I see is funny. I see a coward who runs away from the world."

ESTp are good natured, but they find it very difficult to perform ethical judgements on their own actions and, as the movie shows it, they often realize it only after the harm has been done. This causes conflict between both because ENFp readly critizes rough behaviour.

[FDG]

Too bad one of my best friends is ENFp and I've never had an argument with her. Mikemex, I suggest more objectivity in your judgements.

In any case, in regard to the program, I'd probably have diverted my attention to try to charm the ENFp girl - she's damn hot! Why gangin up on her (unless...literally )

[anndelise]

Shilpa is Se with Fi, Fi subtype, quite likely a Ti polr
the video links given in this thread do show a possibility of enfp, however, upon spending two flippin days viewing numerous clips surrounding the drama between Shilpa and Jade, it becomes quite obvious Shilpa is Se with Fi, Fi subtype. At first I wasn't sure if isfj or esfp, but a couple of the clips do show a fairly clear Ti polr

[mikemex]

Why Se and not Ne? I know an ESFp very well and she doesn't act that way during conflicting situations. Either she starts to cry and play drama or, more likely, starts to charge back with insults and such..

@FDG: You said it yourself: she's your friend. However, for people who do not share bonds, ESTp and ENFp are not likely to stay in the same side for long. Super-Ego relationships are marked for constant protection of each other's weak points. Point of last resistance of each is the creativity zone of the other.

[anndelise]

Why Se and not Ne? I know an ESFp very well and she doesn't act that way during conflicting situations. Either she starts to cry and play drama or, more likely, starts to charge back with insults and such..

lol, Shilpa DID charge back with insults (about class), cry, and play drama after the fight...all day...and the next day...up until Jade was evicted. They both contributed to the drama. But this alone wouldn't make her Se over Ne.

Did you watch Shilpa's opening credit...her entrance into the house?
Did you watch the video clips of her talking with other house mates about the fight afterwards? about the drama that went on between Shilpa and Jade's mom prior to Jade's mom getting evicted? of her controling nature showing through? about how the whole thing got turned into a racist issue instead of an issue of differing classes? about how she used her tears to get attention and people asking how she was doing EVEN at the time that it was announced that Jade was evicted? usually the attention goes to the one who's being evicted....yet somehow, through the use of tears, Shilpa had the room divided...half of it paying attention to her and trying to ease her feelings. I don't think she did this all on purpose, mind, I think it just came natural to her.

I really can't give you a complete argument without going into a play by play of the entire 16 days. I've got better things to do.
At the very least, watch the celeb entrance video part 5...that is Shilpa's pre-entrance clip.

[meatburger]

Are you guys talking about some type of big brother stuff? I cant be bothered watching the videos.

I personally hate big brother but if thats the case shes probablly an ESFp. ESFp's are most likely to be picked for Big Brother out of any other type i would guess.

Party Animal, sex friendly, fun, confident, drama producing types. Big brother was created for ESFp's

[Dioklecian]

Too bad one of my best friends is ENFp and I've never had an argument with her. Mikemex, I suggest more objectivity in your judgements.

In any case, in regard to the program, I'd probably have diverted my attention to try to charm the ENFp girl - she's damn hot! Why gangin up on her (unless...literally )

ENFPs are unusually and incredibly capable of dealing very well with all the other types, including super ego and conflicting types.