I Had foud Dual ESFJ and married with her!!!
You don't know what sacrifices I made in order to know socionics as I know it now. It was 2003.
I then studied at the KPI in the first year of the institute and was an excellent student. I really wanted to find a mate. I didn't have much luck with girls. The situation was so critical that it seemed that there was not even the slightest prospect that I would have a girlfriend. This was what was in my anxious thoughts: What next?... How can I build a family if the task of finding myself even a girlfriend is not solved!?...
What happened? Let's say I try to get acquainted with a girl, and she just turns away from me: what's the matter? I look normal, I behave culturally. What's wrong?
Or another situation: let's say I met, and I make an appointment with her. Ta: tomorrow. I call tomorrow: again: tomorrow. Then again, and again and again ... And then I tell her: listen: maybe I don’t need to call you and offer meetings. She: Yes.
Thoughts: What a bitch! Why the hell did she “feed me breakfast” at all? Why doesn't she care about my time?!
Or another case: let's say I did get a personal meeting. We walked, talked, but she doesn’t let me kiss, but I want this, I not only want this, I also want sex. Otherwise, what's the point of meeting at all? ... I propose a new meeting, but she refuses, and says that I should not call her. Maybe the question is: money? Money was not a problem for me at that time: my parents were entrepreneurs then, and if, for example, I told them that I had a date with a girl, money was immediately allocated for this. It cost me nothing to take a girl to a cafe, or to some kind of entertainment event. Once I invited one, and that one: “I don’t have time.” I think: well, maybe if I call her later, will she have time to appear? - No. It didn't appear. I realized that once again I was being led by the nose: instead of sincerely saying their position, they are killing the time of my life in vain!
And what's the matter? I communicate culturally, I look normal, I don’t drink or smoke, I’m kind, caring, loving, inquisitive, loving, and I get such a good deal in return!
And there was also a story: I just came to visit one of my classmates from one of my streams (there are about 120 people), I felt a special attractive energy for her. Her name was Yulia Bogachenko (later, as I understood Yesenin by sociotype). We had such a nice conversation. But it turns out I was in the span: she had a boyfriend.
So what if I'm not attractive enough for her to leave her boyfriend for me?! But there was a plus in the fact that she responded positively for my virtues: the only one who praised me for my qualities!
There was also Snezhana (probably Hamlet): they also talked nicely, but in response to an offer of close relations, he was refused. she had a boyfriend.
And there was also some Tatyana Nikon (also from my stream. Probable socionic type: Hamlet): when we met, she said very emotionally that she loved me, but it was so unusual and shocking for me that I assumed that she was just mocking me, and just ignored her. And he was also afraid to react strongly emotionally. the experience with Olya Lanova was bad in this regard: I thought that if I get carried away by her emotions and start to get emotional in response, I will push her away. And then she got a boyfriend...
About Olya Lanova:
I had a similar story in grades 9-10 with a classmate Olya Lanova (Jack sociotype). I loved her, and I loved her very much. She me - no. And very much no. But in the process of my attempts to get close to her, she sometimes teased me just for the sake of moral sadistic pleasure: put me in a puddle, said that she loved me, but how to hug or kiss - I immediately get it on the head. She was headstrong and emotionally easy going, but every time I got emotional, she didn't like it. So I thought that if you get very emotional, it will scare away the girls.
It seems to me that if I had not ignored this signal from Tatyana, maybe I would have solved my problem. But I flew. But I realized that it was not a false signal of relationship, only after studying socionics, and making a distinction: that THIS IS HAMLET, and THIS IS JACK. And that the Hamlets are sincere in their emotions. And if Hamletessa tells me “I love you”, then she must be immediately taken to the registry office, otherwise she will run away. And as for the emotions of the Jacks - wait for the catch! But then for me it was a “single female psychology”, and without such distinctions as types, it is impossible to determine exactly when a woman sincerely loves you and wants you as a man, and when she simply manipulates and tries to fool something, well, or simply mocks. But in order to succeed in relationships of such experience, it is necessary that there be dozens of times more such experience. But do not dial it. in most other cases, acquaintances simply ended in nothing: while I was wandering around Univer, I tried to get acquainted with as many girls as possible, but everything just ended in nothing: only conversations: “Hi! What is your name? Where are you studying? What course? There is something about life, about the weather ... "And then that's it ... Dating is as if it had never happened ...
If you dig into my failures in love, they go back as far as 5th grade. I was looking for reciprocity, I was in an active search, but in fact I received rejection over and over again ...
In the 9th grade, I was in such an active search, sorting out the object of attention over and over again, that I even received an accusation that I was allegedly a ladies' man and, what is most terrible, from my school psychologist Grinenko Lyudmila Nikolaevna. It was very unfair: if I haven’t fucked anyone yet, then what kind of womanizer am I?! I am a guy in active search!
So the first year of the institute:
I was looking for a solution. Then I came across the Ideal site, filled out the test, and Robespierre turned out. The test typed 4 Young's dichotomies. Despite the fact that the test had low typing accuracy, the first version turned out to be correct. In the process of learning socionics (First, Jung's Basis, then Model A and the semantics of informational aspects, and then practice, practice, practice), I considered many alternatives, but Robespierre's version turned out to be the closest anyway. In general, the description completely coincided with me, with the option as if I were in the 10th grade (I think 90 percent).
My parents then had a company with 20 employees and gave me tasks to type people. And I typed and gained practice there. But the most effective practice was with those people with whom I entered into interpersonal relationships. In the middle of 2003, we had a course in sociology: as part of this course, I decided to conduct a survey among my classmates, and at the same time I checked the versions of typing by interpersonal relationships. Then I got my first experience: what coincided and what did not. Then the first Dostoevsky was calculated. The first Balzac, the first Yesenin. First Hamlet.
There was another case in the KPI. I was in my first year of college. We entered the computer class. And there sat a certain Tanya. She was 2 years older than me: she typed something on the computer. I told her: "What's your name?" - Tanya
She said it so emotionally, smiling at me. I was blown away by her: wavy long hair, blonde, blue eyes. I said shuddering: "I'm in love with you!" She: "If only you were ashamed!" Then she began to tell that they had recently confessed their love to her in a hostel. But at that moment I became timid and did not know what to do: it seems that she is not very happy with my confession, but is this the person for whom everything must be put and taken? ... I was overcome by doubts .... I looked at her smiling dumbfounded: I see her for the first time ...
In general, it was difficult for me to say a few words to her. After exchanging a couple of phrases, and not feeling strong sympathy, I soon left and went about my business ...
Later I met her by chance. At that moment, I already learned about socionics, and told her: "Let me type you." Either I gave her a test, or an interview, well, in short, after 15 minutes of conversation, I realized: she is Hamlet - and gave her a description of the type. She honored him: and received him.
I remember that she very carelessly crossed the road without looking around: I told her: STOP! Don't go down the road like that! Here are the cars! She: "If the driver knocks me down, he will go to jail, so I have nothing to be afraid of!". And somehow I asked her: "Hug me!" She: "Why hug you?" I: "by the neck" she takes and strangles me: "Unless like this!". It was comical and made me laugh a lot.
But there was no thought of going to Vabank and asking her to marry me right away: after all, socionics ordered me to look for a dual! And small misunderstandings due to which we misunderstand something, and in some places I feel that in my thoughts I just sit in a puddle and in general she has someone, I don’t compete with him - it freezes me in attempts to build something with her. She doesn’t even want to give me her mobile phone ... But now I understand that if I were more persistent and ready for more, more assertive and immediately offered to marry me - I’m sure she would have studied it better : perhaps something would have tried in the relationship between us. I also remember passing by. We met quite by chance in the city. I told her: “Tanya! Hamlet Hello! Do you remember me? She: “Do you forget such a thing?” And shook my hand firmly and energetically with a smile and went on ....
Yulia Bogachenko: I fell in love with her at the institute, I was deeply touched when she praised me: “Does not drink, does not smoke, study” - she did this especially emotionally and I had such feelings that warmth rises from within. I thought: This is Love! And when he came to talk to her in a hostel, he told her: “I fell in love with you,” and she: “Do you tell everyone that?” - it was unpleasant, because I'm a guy in an active search, but in fact I just talked with others, but I fell in love with her then. Communicating with her, I felt positive energy from her, and this added meaning to my life, but she had a different one, and I hoped that it might happen that she would break up with another for me, but at the same time I was afraid to declare how much I love her and want her, afraid that I will scare her away, so I just remained a friend with a claim. When I gave her a test, she turned out to be Hugo. I think: Aha! Here it is! Where is this warmth that I feel from her!
I tell her about who we are in socionics with each other, but she somehow reacted to this with indifference and turned the topic to suffering from how bad she was because of her poor academic performance in higher mathematics ...
But then again, having met with her several times, I notice that in places I am more talkative than she (we are both introverts), and in specifics she is not particularly (intuitive). But what was confirmed during our next meetings was her emotions. She is so cheerful ... And then I realized that I was experiencing suggestion with her creativity. Then I came after a few meetings that her socionic type is Yesenin.
Then I was lucky to meet a few more bright Hamlets, and I realized that I like the information that they tell me. I found several, those who, according to socionics, declared to themselves that they are Hugo. Subsequently, they were retyped into Stirlitz, but I remember that effect of white sensory on myself: it really activates me. Also, I experienced a similar effect when I met a number of other white sensors.
Socionics did not solve the problem then, but it gave me hope that it could be solved and clear recommendations under what circumstances. I realized that I get positive things from white-sensors, and from black-ethics, and if such properties are combined in a single person, it will be super.
How I feel good about the ethics of emotions is shown here:
About how I feel good from the White sensory is shown here:
Section: Activation Culmination
And then I decided to throw all my strength into researching socionics, correcting all the mistakes made by my predecessors, and coming up with a high-precision typing methodology, and finally finding the legendary dual Hugo.
For the sake of this, I applied everything that I knew of high quality in socionics, strove for the maximum accuracy of diagnostics, critically checked and double-checked typing versions. My methodology has known not only one-off typing fixes, but mass fixes, where entire groups of people in my database have been retyped in one fell swoop.
There were waves of mass retypings: 2005: Hugo-Hamlet: several Hugos were retyped into Hamlets, and I realized that I need to be more specific about the features of the work of intuition-sensorics. In the same year: Hugo-Stirli: The Hugoch series were retyped into Stirli, and: 2 at once, then there were more variants of retypes. Reason: mastery and deepening of knowledge in the Constructivism-Emotivism dichotomy: those who claimed to be Hugo showed clear signs of emotivism, which gave rise to the rejection of Hugo's versions
At the beginning of 2006, I declared that Hugo did not exist.
But I continued to believe that Hugo could exist.
In parallel with this, for other reasons, I admitted that Dumas does not exist: arguments: Olga Karpenko, who positions herself as Dumas, is actually Gabin. Plus to everything else: many other Dumas were retyped by me into Yesenins. Thus, I questioned the possibility of the existence of the Dumas type.
I studied everything that is in socionic literature, went to conferences, studied reports, searched for a grain of truth in everyone. Communicated with many socionics: in person and online. We did a consistency check.
He was one of the first who began to translate socionics into digital video format: various observations of types of people, video protocols of typing, and the effects of intertype relationships.
And now, at what cost was this work carried out: in 2003, I was an excellent student in my first year. In the second year I studied like this, and in the third year I dropped out altogether.
I am now 37 years old. Of these, I was unemployed until 30.
I sat on the neck of my parents, and devoted all my productive time to socionic research. My father began to blame on this (because my actions did not bring money), make scandals, assaults and assault, and I lived in my father's disfavor. Instead, I took revenge on my father for not understanding the danger of my personal situation and my methods of solving it: conflicts due to lack of income, along with assault, were in the last 7 years of his life. You could say I hastened his demise. But if he is a sheep, then it is not supposed to live like that. Burn in hell, because it's not good to spoil the great socionics!!!
At the beginning of the 2000s, my parents were rich: they had a company that gave a good income. But the socionic incompatibility of my parents, and as a result, conflicts leading to inefficient decisions gradually bankrupted the company. In 2011, I had such a situation that I even malnourished, trying to work for socionics. But I believed that since I am the best, it means that I must definitely succeed. And I worked. He worked, worked, but the return was - a penny ...
I was offered all sorts of different people to do different things to earn money, including my father, but I always rejected their offers. in this case, I will not have time for socionics, plus everything else, other work will take away my intellectual resources: I will need to reorganize and forget a lot from socionics, but I value socionics. Yes, and perestroika is stressful: if thoughts are about socionics, and for the sake of money I have to learn something that does not get along very well with this science, then I just want to throw this activity away. THIS IS NOT MY MIND!!!
This went on until my teacher Abakumova Valentina, with whom I continued to be friends from school, did not pay attention in 2014 to the fact that I know mathematics perfectly despite the fact that I graduated from school more than 10 years ago, and that I could earn extra money as a tutor mathematics. Mathematics turned out to be the only profession that did not interfere with socionics in my inner world. Programming has taken root a little more, but in programming I know Pascal at the level of an excellent student (now schoolchildren are studying Python, C++, so my knowledge is outdated), but if I need programs, I usually order them from programmers. Understanding the programming process allows me to correctly formulate technical specifications, and thanks to this, programmers agree to do them for me for little money.
So, from the age of 30, I started working as a private tutor in mathematics, and now this business has grown into a full-fledged profession. But I miss working in socionics, because in mathematics I can be replaced, but in socionics I am NOT. Because not a single socionic does what I do, and most likely will not do it in the next few decades!
My father brazenly pestered me with the question: “When will you earn money?” And I told him: “In half a year, how will you ask me about this for the last time,” but he ignored the scope of the communication distance, and still asking me over and over again without meeting the deadlines, and each time resetting the counter. So my father died at the end of 2015. Half a year later, I started earning substantial money in mathematics.
The forecast came true.
In parallel with this, in the middle of 2016, I did find the first Hugohu. Her name was Evgenia Kazakova, but at first I did not believe it and typed her into Hamlets. When I tried to make a video of the TOP-10 Hamletess,
I wanted to include it in the selection, because. I saw that she was all emotional, positive, but at the same time I discovered that she was somehow not like that: she was too touchy (too much specificity) and Declatim (communicates in affirmative intonations). Then I suspected that she was different. In these circumstances, I decided to increase the time of the interview with her to 10 hours, and she gladly agreed to conduct them with me, during which I rethought her socionic type.
It was my first victory. But we were never meant to be a family. I gave up. I was not sure that I could financially pull her 2 children born from previous marriages, plus everything else to make a child of myself, plus everything else she was already many years old, and I wanted more than one, and in her case even one was still problematic to do. I said: let's just be friends, but the relationship began to decline ...
In the middle of 2018, my virtual relationship with Evgenia completely ceased and I was irrevocably blacklisted.
2 months after this event, I discovered Valentina, who was typed by Timur Protsky in Hugo, and compared her interview with Evgenia in my imagination. After that, he wrote to her and said that he had experience of a dual relationship virtually, but did not work out due to the pressure of external circumstances, and invited her to typing.
After talking with her for a total of 10 hours, I came to the conclusion that her socionic type is Hugo. But it was difficult to calculate this and separate it in contrast because of Valentina's increased emphasis on CHI. Here, too, I really wanted to write it either in the Hamlets, or in Huxley.
The last word in this contradiction was just a synchronous video, where I synchronized Evgenia and Valentina by making a video for 7 minutes, in which there were 7 1-minute fragments of synchronous reactions
Attempts were also made to synchronize with other types, but there, at first glance, it was clear that it was not at all right: there was no point in even looking. Comparison of Evgenia's and Valentina's reactions was closest.
At that time, Valentina was in a relationship in a marriage, but she suffered a lot from marriage. She liked me so much then that she decided to file for divorce and arrange for me to travel from Kyiv to St. Petersburg. She rented an apartment for me and prepared it. We started dating in St. Petersburg, and after a month and a half she decided to marry me. In parallel with this, my activity in mathematics developed: I began to earn more and more. Valya also helped me with this: she pulled all her friends and relatives so that more clients would come to me. It was 2019, Valya got pregnant, and I got a good salary by St. Petersburg standards: 50 thousand a month. I did not expect this from myself. Duality has helped to overcome many difficulties. This is success. And now I want to pass on my success to the world in order to reduce many times to everyone, that long way in solving the problem of finding a soul mate that I went through.
So what rewards of fate did I receive: for creating a video about Hamletess
I computed the first reliably accurately typed Hugo.
For creating a video about the Zhukovs, I received an award from fate in the form of the second Hugo: synchronization skills were developed, which made it possible to calculate Hugo even in difficult cases.
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Congrats on your happy ending!
- 
(as per tcaudilllg)
Originally Posted by nifl
