How should I handle it? What do you recommend? I'm already seeing a therapist for cbt and a psychiatrist both of whom ROCK, but i heard i need dbt. cbt doesnt seem to do it well enough. im constantly hypervigilant of others and feel like the world is a dangerous place, and when others don't "rescue me" or "soothe me" I panic. I struggle with feelings of suicidal ideation, but I often hide it for fear of hospitalization. My religious faith in Islamic teachings is one thing that has kept me alive. I still have self harmed numerous times. I don't do it anymore, except maybe by scratching myself with a blunt knife. (kitchen). what's worse is that my brother, who is anal retentive and bitter about all the attention i was shown growing up with disabilities often lusting after women and girls due to stress despite religious taboo in what some would describe as a secretive sect in which many teachers mistreated me at sunday school due to misunderstandings and "turkishness" as i like to call it and my friend likes to call it (we're both turkish, but 2nd gen). he feels like i am a freak and a creep and a "pervert". and other names. he bullies me constantly. he always comes over every weekend just to enjoy my moms cooking, then leaves, saying he only came for the food, saying hes had enough of me, even though i didnt do anything. my mom is quick to satisfy his needs, because she feels guilty about the time he hit me and i called the cops and he got jailed despite me pardoning him and he got bailed out. i want to die. how should i heal?