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Thread: PoLR Moments

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    Handler of Choronzon Djinn's Avatar
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    Wink PoLR Moments

    Do you ever catch yourself in moments with your PoLR exposed, fly down and looking dumb?
    Did you notice somebody else’s PoLR stick out like a sore thumb?

    Well don’t be shy! Come tell us about it!

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    Usually in buildings with multiple restrooms I almost never go to the nearest one. Somehow I always manage to take the trek to the farthest one away from me. I didn’t even realize I did this until about a year ago.
    I’ve gotten in trouble at jobs for doing this. I don’t do it to waste time I swear!

    Actually, I don’t really know why I do it…

    Oh well, you don’t need a T or an e​ to spell “toilet”.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliMeat View Post
    Oh well, you don’t need a T or an e​ to spell “toilet”.
    errrr, wait a second…

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    Waiting for others to write cause I don't think I notice my Te polr
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Lovegood View Post
    Waiting for others to write cause I don't think I notice my Te polr
    What about other people you’ve noticed? Any stinky Si-less LIEs?

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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliMeat View Post
    Usually in buildings with multiple restrooms I almost never go to the nearest one. Somehow I always manage to take the trek to the farthest one away from me. I didn’t even realize I did this until about a year ago.
    I’ve gotten in trouble at jobs for doing this. I don’t do it to waste time I swear!

    Actually, I don’t really know why I do it…

    Oh well, you don’t need a T or an e​ to spell “toilet”.
    This is a very good trait to have if you’re living in a tribe on the African savanna and you get your drinking water from nearby sources.

    Probably, there were lots of people who were not inclined to walk great distances, but they all died of cholera and left no offspring.

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliMeat View Post
    What about other people you’ve noticed? Any stinky Si-less LIEs?
    My underdeveloped Si instead expresses itself in that I keep losing my gloves and cap whenever I forget placing them at their usual spot.
    Imagine me going to university on a frosty winter day, I take my gloves and cap from their dedicated place and cycle towards university. Once I have arrived I put them into my backpack and have them no longer on my mind.
    When my study day finishes I prepare to cycle back. If it is still cold, I recall that I brought my gloves and cap with me and put them on. But if the weather has warmed up through the course of the day, I don't of course.
    Once I have cycled back home I only remember to put my winter wear back where they belong, if I'm actively wearing them. Else, I have completely forgotten about their presence in my backpack and will be surprised the following day that they aren't at their usual spot. I then start panicking, and albeit my backpack is the first place where I check, it has happened more than once that in my panic I check my backpack, but not thoroughly and thus don't see them. I then end up looking frantically all over the place for my gloves and cap, until either I check my backpack a second time and do find them, or time has run out and I have no other choice but to cycle through the cold unprotected... Only for me to find them once I have arrived at university and take something from my backpack.

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Lightbulb The perfect bathroom break algorithm

    Quote Originally Posted by DeliMeat View Post
    Usually in buildings with multiple restrooms I almost never go to the nearest one. Somehow I always manage to take the trek to the farthest one away from me. I didn’t even realize I did this until about a year ago.
    I’ve gotten in trouble at jobs for doing this. I don’t do it to waste time I swear!

    Actually, I don’t really know why I do it…

    Oh well, you don’t need a T or an e​ to spell “toilet”.
    This has actually been researched by fellow psychologists. Their studies show that the middle bathroom stalls are the most used ones, so going for a stall on either end of the row is a better choice. However, the stall at the back is used more frequently than the one at the front, because women who desire a clean stall go more often to the last one. They predict that few others will expend the additional time walking to the far end, but because this is a generally held belief, the first stall is actually the one that's used the least often.
    Though the risk inherent to the first toilet is that if it is used, it is on average used by people who cannot hold it any longer. This means that it is less likely to be dirty, albeit if it is dirty it is generally dirtier than most other stalls except the middle ones.
    My recommendation is thus to go for the first bathroom stall, unless it is dirty, then you'd best go for the last one. I hope that this quirky little algorithm will bring you much joy in life, or at least cleaner toilets and shorter bathroom breaks.

    Here is a pop science review about the toilet studies: https://slate.com/technology/2021/12...-cleanest.html

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armitage View Post
    My underdeveloped Si instead expresses itself in that I keep losing my gloves and cap whenever I forget placing them at their usual spot.
    Imagine me going to university on a frosty winter day, I take my gloves and cap from their dedicated place and cycle towards university. Once I have arrived I put them into my backpack and have them no longer on my mind.
    When my study day finishes I prepare to cycle back. If it is still cold, I recall that I brought my gloves and cap with me and put them on. But if the weather has warmed up through the course of the day, I don't of course.
    Once I have cycled back home I only remember to put my winter wear back where they belong, if I'm actively wearing them. Else, I have completely forgotten about their presence in my backpack and will be surprised the following day that they aren't at their usual spot. I then start panicking, and albeit my backpack is the first place where I check, it has happened more than once that in my panic I check my backpack, but not thoroughly and thus don't see them. I then end up looking frantically all over the place for my gloves and cap, until either I check my backpack a second time and do find them, or time has run out and I have no other choice but to cycle through the cold unprotected... Only for me to find them once I have arrived at university and take something from my backpack.
    Lol, @Armitage.

    I do this exact same thing, every day, with everything I own, including credit cards, my phone, and my computer glasses.

    My mother used to tell me that it was a good thing my head was attached to my body, otherwise, I’d lose it somewhere.

    My SLI ex-wife was incredibly organized and always had everything she needed at hand. She’d look at me and sigh, but she was also kind. She once told me that people who are very organized are just too lazy to look for their stuff.

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    thistle's Avatar
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    I also feel a bit silly when I take the long route (like toilets example above) without realising that I can get away with a shortcut.

    Any procedure that requires an "order of operations" to run smoothly can not be contained in my long-term memory unless the procedure is identical every time. Slight variations will mean I need to write a list down on paper to keep referring back to.

    e. g. "Leave home at 7.15am, Walk to the railway station, Train 8.20am, Buy yoghurt from supermarket at railway station, Walk home. Wash and hang out bedding to dry, Wrap gifts, Pick up tablets gift voucher and cell phone charger, Clear fridge, Take out rubbish, 1.30 or 1.45pm train. "

    Other example: When I'm thinking about someone's Socionics type I will jot a Model A on paper to understand the interactions between different blocks. I can't juggle such things (equations) in my mind - I need to look at and manipulate physical things.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Armitage View Post
    My underdeveloped Si instead expresses itself in that I keep losing my gloves and cap whenever I forget placing them at their usual spot.
    Lol I know you guys aren’t stinky. I was just throwing something out there to try to get the ball rolling.
    I can definitely relate to forgetting where I put things too, but I make it a point that important things have a dedicated place to go. Even then, I have a fairly adequate sense of where I may have misplaced my belongings when that happens so I don’t typically screw myself over.

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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    Any procedure that requires an "order of operations" to run smoothly can not be contained in my long-term memory unless the procedure is identical every time. Slight variations will mean I need to write a list down on paper to keep referring back to.

    e. g. "Leave home at 7.15am, Walk to the railway station, Train 8.20am, Buy yoghurt from supermarket at railway station, Walk home. Wash and hang out bedding to dry, Wrap gifts, Pick up tablets gift voucher and cell phone charger, Clear fridge, Take out rubbish, 1.30 or 1.45pm train. "
    Shiiiiit, it’s so true though. I can’t do laundry very well for this reason. I know there is a procedure to the whole thing like, load the washer then start it and wait, come back and load the dryer, etc. and so on, but if I don’t prepare and dedicate myself to following through with that procedure every time (I usually don’t…), then I usually get stuck on one of the steps. I mean, it’s really simple but nah, usually clothes end up sitting inside the washer for a very long time. The washer is really my primary wardrobe because something about the procedure just doesn’t compute in my mind.

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    EIE Ni H dewusional entitwed snowfwake VewyScawwyNawcissist's Avatar
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    i couldnt cut myself while hiding it at that point (Maybe i could but i still dont know how)
    so i kept trying to photoshop a cut for multiple hours that ultimately failed
    i felt my tendons bc im underweight.




    for months that maybe turned to a year i had windows 7 problem with update that i kept failing fixing and osme of the fixes were bootleg that i found later ppl post online to waste ur time so u get frustrated and want to buy new hardware for windows 10. later i figured there was an update i had to delete and instal manually others in particular that i figured while making a clear installation of win 7 that the guy in a vid explained.
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
    I want to care
    if I was better I’d help you
    if I was better you’d be better
    HELLO??? COME BACK!!!!
    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    Ni PoLR moment of an LSE with me in a car:


    Me -
    *Driving down a road that the LSE and I drive on every day*

    LSE -
    *sits in the passenger seat LSE-ingly*

    Me -
    *Approaches the usual stop sign (which is an overglorified yield sign because you can see the entire road perfectly even before reaching the sign) and notices that there are no cars coming and there is no cop (because there has never been a cop here), so I decide to just drive past the sign without stopping*

    LSE -
    “HOLY SHIT what were you THINKING!? Are you TRYING to get us KILLED!?

    Me -
    “Whoa, it’s ok! I always check to make sure it’s safe. I drive past that stop sign a lot because it’s so easy to see if cars are coming or not before you reach the sign.”

    LSE -
    “Well that doesn’t matter. You have to stop at stop signs. It is the law and they are there for a reason.”

    Me -
    “But—“

    LSE -
    *scowls LSE-ingly*

    *moment of silence*

    LSE -
    “If I were still a cop, I would have pulled your ass over for sure. You’re lucky no cops were around.”

    Me - “There have never been cops there, and besides, I probably would have seen them too since there aren’t really any places to hide.”

    LSE - *disgruntled LSE noises*

    Me - *sighs internally*

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    @VewyScawwyNawcissist

    Oh shit, I did not expect this thread to get dark so quickly like that.

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    i struggle with coherency esp when having to externalzie and sometimes its easier but i lose my thought and dont understand what im saying when it makes sense to others and the other way around
    also have not yet srpead the book and info i figured.
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
    I want to care
    if I was better I’d help you
    if I was better you’d be better
    HELLO??? COME BACK!!!!
    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    The Morning Star EUDAEMONIUM's Avatar
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    Typical Si PoLR moments in my life are usually pointed out by an alpha SF. Not wearing a jacket or coat on a cold day. Wearing shorts in the snow. Not wearing appropriate clothing in general.

    My mom would always tell me I would eat the "wrong" foods for the "wrong" times. I like eating a cheeseburger for breakfast.

    Not being able to find where I left things like my keys and wallet.

    Wearing clothes that need to be thrown away like shoes with holes in them.

    I ignored an infected wisdom tooth for a year before I got around to removing it.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

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    thistle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliMeat View Post
    Shiiiiit, it’s so true though. I can’t do laundry very well for this reason. I know there is a procedure to the whole thing like, load the washer then start it and wait, come back and load the dryer, etc. and so on, but if I don’t prepare and dedicate myself to following through with that procedure every time (I usually don’t…), then I usually get stuck on one of the steps. I mean, it’s really simple but nah, usually clothes end up sitting inside the washer for a very long time. The washer is really my primary wardrobe because something about the procedure just doesn’t compute in my mind.
    Since you brought up laundry left in the machine I thought I would mention that I have devised "work-arounds" for such a scenario. If I did not, I would probably get distracted and miss the opportunity to hang my laundry out before having to be at work/elsewhere. I begin the wash and then find myself an errand or other chore to do that takes approximately the same amount of time as my wash cycle...maybe I'll prep a dinner and put it in the oven. Finishing the dinner prep signals me to go back and check/hang up my washing. If I think of "laundry & related" taking up a specific time block it's easier for me to know where to fit that block into my day. Back when I was flat sharing this was more complicated... I have things easy now that I live alone.

    I always thought of PoLR as the one you find workarounds for, to feel a little more competent. Haha. Merry Christmas by the way, it must be just about that time

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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    I always thought of PoLR as the one you find workarounds for, to feel a little more competent. Haha. Merry Christmas by the way, it must be just about that time
    Haha, you may be a bit higher-functioning than me in that regard because leaving the clothes in the washer is my workaround. I most often think of the PoLR as the function sacrificed in favor of the creative since they are usually incompatible. It’s not always conscious or anything but it does happen. I mean, it has to happen, right? If one has creative Fe, your mood becomes one of your greatest assets and needs to be taken care of since your mood will often be used to great affect. Us Fe creative types usually prefer to be in a good mood, I think, and Te-related activities are generally antithetical to a good mood. Or just whatever mood, I guess.

    And yeah, merry Christmas, Thistle! I hope you have a good one!

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    @Eudaimonia, yeah, not dressing up to the seasons is very recognizable. When winter starts I first need to have lasted through the cold to bring my winter clothes, whereas in spring I continue wearing my winter clothes until I start becoming too hot due to them, and in summer I generally first get sunburned before I realize that I should start using sunscreen again.
    On the other hand, I do watch out to always wear decent clothes, if anything is truly worn out I toss it in the clothing recycle bin. I want to make a good impression, after all.
    Regarding medical issues I have the opposite, since I cannot easily differentiate if something is a problem or not I visit the doctor and the dentist too often. I perceive my body like a car, if I maintain it semi-regularly I can depend on it, whereas if I ignore it it becomes an unreliable pain in the back and then I have to start fixing all its complaints before it starts to properly function again. I hate it when that happens, it's so time consuming and pointless.

    Anyway, merry Christmas everyone!
    Last edited by Armitage; 12-25-2021 at 11:33 AM.

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    May look like an LSI, but Te. Metaphor's Avatar
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    Maybe not.
    Not really.
    Arthur Schopenhauer (ILI-Ni):

    • “A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.”


    Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel (ILI-Te):


    • "The history of the world is none other than the progress of the consciousness of freedom."



  22. #22
    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Djinn View Post

    Ni PoLR moment of an LSE with me in a car:


    Me -
    *Driving down a road that the LSE and I drive on every day*

    LSE -
    *sits in the passenger seat LSE-ingly*

    Me -
    *Approaches the usual stop sign (which is an overglorified yield sign because you can see the entire road perfectly even before reaching the sign) and notices that there are no cars coming and there is no cop (because there has never been a cop here), so I decide to just drive past the sign without stopping*

    LSE -
    “HOLY SHIT what were you THINKING!? Are you TRYING to get us KILLED!?

    Me -
    “Whoa, it’s ok! I always check to make sure it’s safe. I drive past that stop sign a lot because it’s so easy to see if cars are coming or not before you reach the sign.”

    LSE -
    “Well that doesn’t matter. You have to stop at stop signs. It is the law and they are there for a reason.”

    Me -
    “But—“

    LSE -
    *scowls LSE-ingly*

    *moment of silence*

    LSE -
    “If I were still a cop, I would have pulled your ass over for sure. You’re lucky no cops were around.”

    Me - “There have never been cops there, and besides, I probably would have seen them too since there aren’t really any places to hide.”

    LSE - *disgruntled LSE noises*

    Me - *sighs internally*
    LSE's Ni-polr in cars seems to be a thing. Here's my story, it shows Ni-polr under pressure quite well.

    It was the day of my Grandpa's ( SLI-Te ) funeral. After a long and arduous negotiation with my mathematics uncle ( SLE-Ti ) my Father ( LSE-Si ) was able to draw a funeral plan that my uncle, my Aunt ( ESE-Si ), and my side of the family all agreed on. Nevertheless, my mathematics uncle and mathematics cousin ( ESE-Fe ) made some last-minute changes to the plan that they didn't discuss with us and that screwed everyone over, but suited them better.
    My Mother ( ESI-Fi ) was picking up my Grandma ( ESE-Si ) from Mother's side and would meet up there with my Sister ( ESI-Se ) and her boyfriend ( EII-Fi ) who would come from their home. They then would return to our home to all drive together to my Grandpa's house. My Father and I were waiting on Mom and the bunch. We had agreed to gather together with all the sides of the family at my Grandpa's house at half past in the morning.

    Preamble

    LSE-Si: "Get ready, we have to be there at half."
    LIE-Ni: 'I'm working on it, though don't rush me so much, we still have more than half an hour before we have to leave.'

    15 minutes pass

    LIE-Ni: 'I'm ready, when is Mom coming?'
    LSE-Si: "She should be here soon, but she's first picking up your Sister and her boyfriend."
    LIE-Ni: 'I thought she was going to pick up Grandma?'
    LSE-Si: "Yes, also."
    LIE-Ni: 'If she's going to make a detour all the way to my Sister's home it'll take ages. Why can't my Sister just drive herself towards there?'
    LSE-Si: "She is, but they gather at Grandma's house."
    LIE-Ni: 'Why there? That makes no sense. They could just as well have driven the extra mile to go straight to Grandpa's house.'
    LSE-Si: "It's not my plan, it's your Mother's idea."
    LIE-Ni: 'Yeah, it sounds like her, indeed. But why has no-one told me about it?'
    LSE-Si: "I'm telling you now."
    LIE-Ni: 'But why not earlier?'
    LSE-Si: "She thought of it yesterday evening."
    LIE-Ni: -_-

    10 minutes pass

    LIE-Ni: 'We should be going soon. Where's Mom?'
    LSE-Si: "Still picking up the family, I'll call her."
    ...
    LSE-Si: "She doesn't answer, she's probably driving. I'll message her instead."

    5 minutes pass


    LIE-Ni: 'Have you heard anything from Mom already? Where is she currently? We really should be going now, if we want to be on time. Mom is probably just driving straight to Grandpa's and otherwise she will soon follow suit. It's more important that you're there on time.'
    LSE-Si: "No, she isn't driving towards my Father's house, because we agreed to meet up here! She has yet to message me back and I don't know where she's at!"

    LIE-Ni: 'Let's go!'
    LSE-Si: "That isn't the plan!"
    LIE-Ni puts on his jacket.
    LIE-Ni: 'Mom won't make it in time, nor will we if we keep waiting for her.
    LSE-Si starts his Depart from home-protocol with all the intermediary steps. While the LSE-Si is doing that LIE-Ni sees an important paper still lying on the table, presumes the LSE-Si has forgotten about it. Since I don't see him, I instead take it with me so it won't be forgetten. I then head to the car.
    The LSE-Si arrives with a flower arrangement and a bucket full of flower petals.
    LIE-Ni: 'Why didn't you get that inside the car earlier?! We've got to go!'
    LSE-Si: "I had to wait until we would leave, because they would have gotten moisty in the car."

    LSE-Si heads back inside the home thereafter. I see him going all over the place. I join back in: 'What's wrong?'
    LSE-Si: "The paper, I had put it here, but I don't see it!"
    LIE-Ni: 'I brought it with me, because it looked important and it seemed like you had forgotten it.'
    LSE-Si: "You should have asked!"
    LIE-Ni: 'You were on the freaking toilet, something that you could have done all this time while we were waiting on Ma!'
    LIE-Ni takes the piece of paper from his pocket.
    LSE-Si grabs it: "You folded it!"
    LIE-Ni: 'It wouldn't have fit otherwise!'
    LSE-Si: "It's ruined!"
    LIE-Ni: 'It's better than nothing! Fold it back and let's head out.'

    We start driving towards my Grandpa's place. Throughout the drive my Father ( LSE-Si ) starts scolding me for holding him up by making the paper disappear.
    LIE-Ni: 'You hypocrite! I told you that we should leave 10 minutes ago already!'
    LSE-Si: "It's due to you and your Mom that I'm late!"
    My Father starts crying. It's only been a handful of times that I have actually seen my Dad cry. The rest of the ride we say nothing to each other.

    We arrive three minutes late. When we come at my Grandpa's house my Mom had just arrived before us with the rest of the Family in her car. Once my Dad and I have parked my Aunt drives onto the lane. She steps out and immediately says: "Apologies that we're late, there was a huge traffic jam." My Sister's boyfriend: 'The A12 probably? Yeah, we were stuck there too, it took us ages!'
    We walk inside the home. My Father has calmed down a bit, though he's still berrating Mom for not sticking to the plan.

    About half an hour later the funeral undertaker arrives: "Sorry for the delay, we had wanted to be here a quarter of an hour earlier, as was planned with LSE-Si, but there was a traffic jam. I leave you now for 10 more minutes to say your final goodbyes to your beloved before my colleagues and I will come back." I look in disbelief at my Father: 'Wait, all this time he was planned to come at quarter to, not half past? Why were you so frantic then?' LSE-Si: "We had to be present to receive the rest of the family."

    My uncle and his family only come over once the undertaker has already arrived, even though my uncle lives in the street next to my Grandpa's house and my civil engineering cousin in the same street as my Grandpa! There's no traffic jam that could possibly have delayed them from being on time, let alone this much!
    I complain about it to my Mother that I was unjustly lambasted by Dad that we were too late, even though it was just in order to receive the mathematics family who are themselves far too late. My Mom responds that my uncle had asked her to message him when the undertaker had arrived, because he didn't want to come any earlier.

    I would like to say that the rest of the day was uneventful, but I'd be lying if I did. Let's just say that both my side and my Aunt's side of the family were glad when the day was over. What a stress! It was nothing like the cremation of my other Grandpa ( ESI-Fi ), which happened in a mood of togetherness.
    Last edited by Armitage; 12-25-2021 at 11:51 AM.

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Djinn View Post
    Lol I know you guys aren’t stinky. I was just throwing something out there to try to get the ball rolling.
    Haha, it definitely worked.

    Quote Originally Posted by Djinn View Post
    I can definitely relate to forgetting where I put things too, but I make it a point that important things have a dedicated place to go. Even then, I have a fairly adequate sense of where I may have misplaced my belongings when that happens so I don’t typically screw myself over.
    Same and it thus doesn't happen too often, yet more often than I would like.

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    Awww, I feel sorry for your father. All of that must have been really hard on him to make him cry.

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Yeah, my uncle is really hard on him, on anyone really. His powerplays and games are quite off-putting. Many of the SLEs I have met do this, it makes me feel uncomfortable around them. I have met a few SLEs who are chill to be around with, however. Although one of these chill ones might actually be a SEE. In some cases I find it difficult to distinguish the two, namely.

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    ☽ the cutest type ☾ Aquamarine's Avatar
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    @thistle you changed your type to SEI? Or were you always SEI?
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    EIE Ni H dewusional entitwed snowfwake VewyScawwyNawcissist's Avatar
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    my dad said he wants things simple, strives for normalcy. he also said when he's in bad position/posture, he gets a kind of dread "as if i dont adjust my body i will die now". but he doesnt move it and it goes away. what geos away is actual brain function, and thats experienced as death, death is nothing, so nothing happens.
    he's been easily frustrated and tired his whole life which is directly related but he attributes it to just being old. he doesnt try hard. whatever bad happens ignores it and moves on. ofc he does try hard about other things like being punctual and getting things done. its a self destructive mindset. my parents and most ppl are defined by bad habits they never attempt to change.
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
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    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    ☽ the cutest type ☾ Aquamarine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by VewyScawwyNawcissist View Post
    my dad said he wants things simple, strives for normalcy. he also said when he's in bad position/posture, he gets a kind of dread "as if i dont adjust my body i will die now". but he doesnt move it and it goes away. what geos away is actual brain function, and thats experienced as death, death is nothing, so nothing happens.
    he's been easily frustrated and tired his whole life which is directly related but he attributes it to just being old. he doesnt try hard. whatever bad happens ignores it and moves on. ofc he does try hard about other things like being punctual and getting things done. its a self destructive mindset. my parents and most ppl are defined by bad habits they never attempt to change.
    what type is your dad?
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Lovegood View Post
    what type is your dad?
    i was hoping ppl would guess.
    he is
    LSE
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
    I want to care
    if I was better I’d help you
    if I was better you’d be better
    HELLO??? COME BACK!!!!
    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Lovegood View Post
    @thistle you changed your type to SEI? Or were you always SEI?
    I have always had that type (SEI) but it took some life events and feedback from others to make me believe in it.

    I'm an introvert who helps others by removing stressors in their environment, while trying to beautify or give their surroundings character. My tendency is to look out for the wellbeing of people who don't seem to look after themselves enough - usually they are burning the candle at both ends. I can help them best in a practical and silent sort of way, not so much by being consoling or compassionate with my words or insightful like a guidance counsellor figure. I don't have the gall to stand up and vocalise for the rights of these people. It's easier for me to work with materials/resources already available and to make every day a little lovelier or soothing on a one-to-one level: the feeling you get when you see fresh flowers placed in a concrete otherwise utilitarian office space...or noticing that the kitchen teatowels have been refreshed with good clean ones.

    I do not condemn people's actions. It takes a lot before someone crosses my line of outrage/intolerance, and I turn things over in my mind a lot before deciding on my stance. ESI is an unlikely type for me - the other type I considered in the past is IEI but as I grow older being an intuitive type seems more and more unlikely.

    Does any of this resonate with you?

    Djinn made a valid point about the PolR function being antithetical to good mood. Thinking about my example of sprucing up workplace desks with real flowers; they don't live for very long, so they need to be renewed on a regular basis. That makes flowers an un-economical option for improving the appearance of a functional office. Te will vet the usefulness of an action, and this will inevitably trim down aspects of "personal flair" and "character"

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    ☽ the cutest type ☾ Aquamarine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    I have always had that type (SEI) but it took some life events and feedback from others to make me believe in it.

    I'm an introvert who helps others by removing stressors in their environment, while trying to beautify or give their surroundings character. My tendency is to look out for the wellbeing of people who don't seem to look after themselves enough - usually they are burning the candle at both ends. I can help them best in a practical and silent sort of way, not so much by being consoling or compassionate with my words or insightful like a guidance counsellor figure. I don't have the gall to stand up and vocalise for the rights of these people. It's easier for me to work with materials/resources already available and to make every day a little lovelier or soothing on a one-to-one level: the feeling you get when you see fresh flowers placed in a concrete otherwise utilitarian office space...or noticing that the kitchen teatowels have been refreshed with good clean ones.

    I do not condemn people's actions. It takes a lot before someone crosses my line of outrage/intolerance, and I turn things over in my mind a lot before deciding on my stance. ESI is an unlikely type for me - the other type I considered in the past is IEI but as I grow older being an intuitive type seems more and more unlikely.

    Does any of this resonate with you?
    I bolded the parts that I'm sure I relate to. Especially the part about being consoling with my words, I've always felt like I was not good at that stuff. But I'm not sure if it's SEI specific. I feel like I do stuff for people a lot but don't really get the same from them so I think that's the practical part.
    As for the beautifying surroundings, I don't find myself doing that much if at all. Like it seems nice in theory, but I just never get around the actually doing it.

    I don't really find myself being confident in an ESI typing either. I guess I would need someone to explain to me why they think I'm another type for me to fully consider it. I said before i feel like a fraud with the ni, fi, typings lol so I'll just stick with SEI for now even if I regard the caregiver stuff with disdain

    I feel like other SEIs here don't seem to have an issue with the caregiver thing and I'm the only one that's bothered by it. I guess I have an issue with it seeming like I'm somebody's mother.

    I get really triggered by anything that implies that in any way. Even the whole thing with men listing their taste in women and they say shit like cooking it just pisses me off lol it's like is that all women are good for (I've said this before i think but it feels like everyone in society is expecting that type of stuff but it's probably just the people I encounter)

    Don't want to derail the thread so I'll just stop here
    Last edited by Aquamarine; 12-26-2021 at 02:59 AM.
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    @thistle Why don't you think you're an intuitive type, just out of curiosity?

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    May look like an LSI, but Te. Metaphor's Avatar
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    You seem positivist.
    Arthur Schopenhauer (ILI-Ni):

    • “A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.”


    Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel (ILI-Te):


    • "The history of the world is none other than the progress of the consciousness of freedom."



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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Yes, LSE or SLI makes sense for him. You probably know best if he's more of an extro- or introvert, @VewyScawwyNawcissist. One thing stands out to me, though:
    Quote Originally Posted by VewyScawwyNawcissist View Post
    he doesnt try hard. whatever bad happens ignores it and moves on. its a self destructive mindset. my parents and most ppl are defined by bad habits they never attempt to change.
    Normally LSEs and SLIs want to change the bad things in their lives, so they can live contently again without said problem. It strikes me as unusual for them to simply ignore it, unless they do not know how to solve it and that ignoring the issue is thus their only remaining coping strategy. If that happens a lot and especially during their youth, then they might internalize avoiding problems, instead of tackling them, even if this runs contrary to their type. Formally this is called learned helplessness. Would this describe your father possibly?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Armitage View Post
    Yes, LSE or SLI makes sense for him. You probably know best if he's more of an extro- or introvert, @VewyScawwyNawcissist. One thing stands out to me, though:

    Normally LSEs and SLIs want to change the bad things in their lives, so they can live contently again without said problem. It strikes me as unusual for them to simply ignore it, unless they do not know how to solve it and that ignoring the issue is thus their only remaining coping strategy. If that happens a lot and especially during their youth, then they might internalize avoiding problems, instead of tackling them, even if this runs contrary to their type. Formally this is called learned helplessness. Would this describe your father possibly?
    ignoring vs solving problesm is an incredibly vague thing. people ignore some for the sake of addressing others. what he's doing is completely in line with his type, not contrary at all. they push others to the same level of performance for the sake of sacrificing their health, growth, mental health and other various important things.
    he is achievement inclined as long as it is within the norm/conventinality/whatever's already established instead of going beyond it like a LIE would strive to. @Adam Strange said LSE's companies rely on an old product/trick. thats just what they do. "sit" on things. ignore. this problem i said about he doesnt even believe affects his cognition or it doesnt matter that it does anyways. He already has a good job and he is satisfied with what he can get out of his life, things beyond are too much effort (it feels like its too much effort bc his body is malfuncitoning bc he is ignoring it. so it is too much effort).
    In MBTI it's said ENTP cosntantly change their position and sit in weird positions. i have always hated this about sensors, Si just seems to splurge and be static while Se is also static but in motion if that makes sense. they force their movements. its ugly and makes me uncomfortable. it has also been a thing i absorb so i have always been reperssed from adjusting my body properly. that would be weird and autistic right. fcuk those guys

    eduaimonia said the emotion he fears most is complacency. complacency is Si. My SEI mother says her biases, she doesnt need to question or change, bc if her "natural" biases were wrong, they wouldnt be there. they are strong disgustin reactions, esp to gay, flamboyant, sexual, demonic etc aesthetics and related things. thats a stagnation mentality and it comes from tribal origins of the types, where Si egos where farmers. demons are archetypes of change. my father is content for the most part. he wont change until its too late. thats the difference between Ni and Si. Ni seeks to avoid things before they happen. he just ignores for as long as he can and then does something when its already too late.

    Ni is all those small things and decisions others ignore culminating into the difference between an unsolvable problem with exponential consequences and actual improvement and progress
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
    I want to care
    if I was better I’d help you
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    HELLO??? COME BACK!!!!
    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    Djinn made a valid point about the PolR function being antithetical to good mood. Thinking about my example of sprucing up workplace desks with real flowers; they don't live for very long, so they need to be renewed on a regular basis. That makes flowers an un-economical option for improving the appearance of a functional office. Te will vet the usefulness of an action, and this will inevitably trim down aspects of "personal flair" and "character"
    That depends on if they are cut bouquet flowers or lasting perennials. The next Te-manager who objects against your proposal for plants you can tell the following: "Plants produce fresh oxygen, which is necessary for a conducive work environment. Additionally, it has been researched that plants on the workfloor elevate people's mood and thereby their productivity by a greater margin than the cost of the plants themselves. In comparison, they cost at lot less than organizing the next drinks, while retaining their efficacy continuously. They thus easily pay themselves out, as long as you go for the low-maintenance perennials."
    You just need to learn to speak their lingo, but then you can get a lot done your way.
    Last edited by Armitage; 12-26-2021 at 07:24 PM.

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    Psychology BSc and statistics MSc Armitage's Avatar
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    Thanks for the explanation, it clarifies a lot.

    Quote Originally Posted by VewyScawwyNawcissist View Post
    He already has a good job and he is satisfied with what he can get out of his life, things beyond are too much effort (it feels like its too much effort bc his body is malfuncitoning bc he is ignoring it. so it is too much effort).
    A Si-user ignoring his body sounds definitely problematic. Can you not convince him to visit your family doctor, because his medical problems will deteriorate his work performance until he will lose his job? You might want to mobilize his Te to take action by provoking his Ni-polr a bit with the prospect of losing his comfortable Si position?

    Quote Originally Posted by VewyScawwyNawcissist View Post
    My SEI mother says her biases, she doesnt need to question or change, bc if her "natural" biases were wrong, they wouldnt be there.
    You're right, VewyScawwyNawcissist, the only reason that she has those biases is because she's raised that way and never questions them. And she never questions them, because she keeps curb stomping any conversation about them with that awful dead-end naturalistic fallacy of hers. It must be incredibly frustrating to talk to her about these things, due to her incredible stubbornness to discount any disagreeing opinions. Perhaps too strong an analogy, but if she had cancer would she then also tell her doctor that she doesn't want chemotherapy, because if her natural instincts were wrong, she wouldn't feel nauseous from the chemo? It's ignorant to presume that one is always right, because one feels that way.
    Last edited by Armitage; 12-26-2021 at 03:12 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Armitage View Post
    Thanks for the explanation, it clarifies a lot.


    A Si-user ignoring his body sounds definitely problematic. Can you not convince him to visit your family doctor, because his medical problems will deteriorate his work performance until he will lose his job? You might want to mobilize his Te to take action by provoking his Ni-polr a bit with the prospect of losing his comfortable Si position?
    AHAHHAHAAH he is the family doctor. he wont lose his job bc he is (was) very smart and studied hard for 10 or more years iirc. he is also a head doctor where he works.
    he also had a kid that died at 8 and a wife that cheated on him. he has prolly been depressed for decades. half the food he eats is junk food bc if it was really that bad then it wouldn't be allowed to be sold and on top of that his body will deteriorate from age anyway, its no use to protect it. that said he has tried to lose weight and eats very little in general. he has lessened it further multiple times but every time he doesnt lose enough and has too little energy.

    now about my stubborness.. this may be unrelated to what u mean but i wanted to rant.

    i would also refuse the chemo, and listen to my body, try to understand wahts happening instead of just listening and following stupid advice, that i did follow and things turned out bad for me that im still recovering from that.
    i couldnt eat some foods as a kid bc they made me choke. i literally couldnt swallow it on top of it feeling really nasty in my mouth. multiple times i'd tried some of them losing breath just wont cut it. other foods i refused due to nasty sensation. i was feeling really bad in general. it really doesnt make sense for the thing supposed to give u energy and perpetuate ur survival to make u feel like shit, and to have to go through majority of life that way.
    i force fed myself butter to gain weight despite it releasing too much bile that burnt my insides.
    i force fed myself bread and potatoes despite them ruining my teeth. and i did force myself to brush cosnistently despite it proving ineffective and the toxic compounds anyway, and that it makes no sense to have to do this at all.
    i have both refused and accepted processed meats later to only learn my innitial disgust with them was validated by salt and nitrate toxicity when cooked, maybe even nitrite as a reaction during digestion.
    and i later learned leafy greens are actually toxic.
    i forced myself through mad gulag by LIE teacher that destroyed my sense of self and reality as it got replaced by math and frustration. as if math is gonna solve all my problems and all the rest i care about doesnt matter, as if me experincesing this as "feeling" somehow undermines it.
    im anti vax and anti chemo anti medication. just because pills make u feel good doesnt mean u are good. doctors have been known to be rather stubborn, opionated and dismissive as well, resulting in worsening many people's problems, on top of the industry being fallacious, on top of how people approach "understanding" and "learning" in general is wrong. ppl's illness not being recognized bc its not a thing yet so they are delusional lazy attention seekers.
    ive cosnsitently been accused of being impossible to argue with throughout the years by various people. im saying this bc its common for ppl to just say u're stubborn when u dont awnt to "accept" their opinion, when i may have already considered it, and the common way ppl dissmiss what's "natural" and feelings. her instincts arent wrong about the chemo. it does hurt u, it jsut also hurts the cancer. now as far as i've learned, thats not worth or necessary, which was by innitial feeling/thought, about the implications of what u do to ur body about a disease thats not even "understood".
    feelings are physiological. it turns out bread is bad for u but it makes u feel good, due to factors, but at the same it also makes u feel bad later, ppl just dont figure it's the bread. and it is an "unnatural" food. feelings/instinct is something to investigate. my dad's problem that's deteriorating him is for the sake of his Te in the short term if u will. what im saying about his cognition and body declining due to him splurging would me my delusions and biased feelings, bc its not "proven". its just bc he is old and we know that happens to old people, and the variation of how bad it is is just genetic, right. it being genetic has become a cop out of investigating anything.
    Your face makes your brain and sociotype – how muscle use shapes personality
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    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.



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    Fi Polr: I am unlovable lion who, each day, walks past a beaming sentimental heart enclosed inside a bulletproof glass case.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Armitage View Post
    That depends on if they are cut bouquet flowers or lasting perennials. The next Te-manager who objects against your proposal for plants you can tell the following: "Plants produce fresh oxygen, which is necessary for a conducive work environment. Additionally, it has been researched that plants on the workfloor elevate people's mood and thereby their productivity by a greater margin than the cost of the plants themselves. In comparison, they cost at lot less than organizing the next drinks, while retaining their efficacy continuously. They thus easily pay themselves out, as long as you go for the low-maintenance perennials."
    You just need to learn to speak their lingo, but then you can get a lot done your way.
    I don't know whether it was your intention to bring humour but this made me smile knowingly. The first part about fresh oxygen and a mindset improved by bringing the outdoors/green indoors would be convincingly natural coming from me, but I would probably not feel confident stating the long-term cost benefits or claiming to know the expense of work drinks/catering. I do appreciate the pointers though it is a lot of data points to memorise. If the tactic here is to bowl someone over with Te, it all makes sense now. On the receiving end of this, I need time to walk away and digest the sales pitch

    Since writing my original post I had an even better idea of a room divider/office credenza with planter boxes along the top. With one of those you can combine filing/storage with a living breathing component and even wheel the room divider around to different locations to catch more light or create a different layout.

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