Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: Limerence

  1. #1
    Fuck this toxic snake pit Fluffy Princess Unicorn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2019
    Posts
    5,763
    Mentioned
    228 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Limerence

    I'm just creating a new thread on this topic out of respect for OP's wishes in this thread: https://www.the16types.info/vbulleti...-and-limerence


  2. #2
    Fuck this toxic snake pit Fluffy Princess Unicorn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2019
    Posts
    5,763
    Mentioned
    228 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by CptLandhawk View Post
    It means to rest and build strength back up. We have a similar saying in Spanish. If you translate everything 1 to 1 from certain languages without adjusting it to context in English, you get confusing moments like this, and I'd go a step further to say It's possibly distorted some of our understanding of socionics...but that's for another thread




    As for the topic at hand I share your opinion. I'm pretty sober when it comes to romance and relationships. Attraction I feel very strongly. Limerence on the other hand, sounds like what I've criticized in others for years, but now I finally have the word. In my opinion It's good to take sober and realistic note of what keeps the two individuals together...not to get wrapped up in fantasy.Once I have enough exposure to determin, not only that it's realistic to keep this thing going,but that we're both on the same page and headed in the same direction, then and only then can I develop love. Anything outside of that is just attraction
    That was helpful, thanks. I hadn't considered that possibility. I shouldn't have had that attitude toward it before inquiring more. That was a lesson learned for me, I'll try to keep a more open/receptive mind in the future.


    I have criticized similar things, but in my case, it's been about general willful self-delusion in relationships. I always think of this song when I think about this subject...



    I suspect that one reason some people would want limerence and lies is that they believe reality is unable to supply them with happiness. Some people are also just emotionally weak and won't face it, though. Sad, since that always produces worse outcomes in their lives. It's better to rip off the band-aid, get through it, and move on to better options.


  3. #3
    CptLandhawk's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2021
    TIM
    ESFp-Fi 7w8 Sp/Sx
    Posts
    70
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Some people also end up flipping their entire lives around to accommodate someone who is not ideal for them, or makes it one sided and end up in really bad situations due to limerence.

  4. #4
    The Morning Star EUDAEMONIUM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    gone
    TIM
    EIE
    Posts
    3,130
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Hmm, where one sees limerance, another sees love. I honestly don't like words like this, they have too much precision. I want it to be love, unhealthy and healthy, good and bad.

    I could use this diagram:



    Unfortunately, I don't stop thinking about the ones I love and I won't stop. Everything seems to be describing behaviors and thought patterns and not feelings.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

  5. #5
    Restricted user
    Join Date
    Dec 2018
    Location
    Deutschland
    TIM
    SLI-Si 6w5 613 sp/so
    Posts
    2,522
    Mentioned
    108 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eudaimonia View Post
    Hmm, where one sees limerance, another sees love. I honestly don't like words like this, they have too much precision. I want it to be love, unhealthy and healthy, good and bad.

    I could use this diagram:



    Unfortunately, I don't stop thinking about the ones I love and I won't stop. Everything seems to be describing behaviors and thought patterns and not feelings.
    According to this, I've never felt love, only limerence, minus the giving affection part. I always give more than I receive.

  6. #6
    The Morning Star EUDAEMONIUM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    gone
    TIM
    EIE
    Posts
    3,130
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by JetteroLo View Post
    According to this, I've never felt love, only limerence, minus the giving affection part. I always give more than I receive.
    I hope that changes for you.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

  7. #7
    ☽ the cutest type ☾ Aquamarine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2021
    TIM
    SEI 9w1
    Posts
    1,474
    Mentioned
    85 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I think this article explains linerence well enough.
    https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.min...cles/limerence
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




  8. #8
    ☽ the cutest type ☾ Aquamarine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2021
    TIM
    SEI 9w1
    Posts
    1,474
    Mentioned
    85 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eudaimonia View Post
    Hmm, where one sees limerance, another sees love. I honestly don't like words like this, they have too much precision. I want it to be love, unhealthy and healthy, good and bad.

    Unfortunately, I don't stop thinking about the ones I love and I won't stop. Everything seems to be describing behaviors and thought patterns and not feelings.
    I'm confused about the unhealthy part. As to why you'd what that?

    I don't think anyone actually stops thinking about people they love. In the case of limerence, it seems to be obsession to the point of over interpreting things that happen between them and other, not seeing the person for who they really are and ignoring red flags and things like that. It's like not giving the other person a chance to be accepted for who they are because you've built up and image of them that you want.
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




  9. #9
    The Morning Star EUDAEMONIUM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    gone
    TIM
    EIE
    Posts
    3,130
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Lovegood View Post
    I'm confused about the unhealthy part. As to why you'd what that?

    I don't think anyone actually stops thinking about people they love. In the case of limerence, it seems to be obsession to the point of over interpreting things that happen between them and other, not seeing the person for who they really are and ignoring red flags and things like that. It's like not giving the other person a chance to be accepted for who they are because you've built up and image of them that you want.

    I don't remember what point I was trying to make here.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •