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Thread: Types and Physical Confrontation

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    Default Types and Physical Confrontation

    How do you handle physical confrontation? What are some examples that have happened in your life?
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    I haven't had any instances of physical confrontation since I've been a child. I think it happen two or three times, I don't even know what was the reason for two of them. Back then it usually led to a fight.

    For the one that I do remember. We were basically having a disagreement about where to sit in class. We both wanted to sit at the same place and somehow a fight started. The teachers came and had us sit down and they said some shit, made us apologize to each other. Then we ended up becoming best friends for a while.
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    When I really care about something and I have my reasons to back it up I'll go forward and won't back down. I'm fairly weak though so I haven't gotten to physical confrontations and I also don't understand why things should escalate to that point. So if that happens I'll probably push it to the verbal argumentation route instead.



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    I typically avoid it but I find that if I have to confront, physical or otherwise its better to do it as quickly as possible.
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    don’t fight back and play possum , I’d rather not escalate the situation
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    I haven't really had the need for physical confrontation. There have been many times where someone would want to fight me and I would deescalate the situation. I actually don't know how I got away with it.

    I haven't really gotten mad enough to want to hit someone, my heart isn't really in it.
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    For me these kinds of things happened when I was kid. I don't think I was confronted for real. We played some games or did stuff and some of it was physical, but I wouldn't say those were physical confrontations.

    There were times that I almost got into it, but then nothing happened. For example, when I had an argument with a kid in our school bus, things got heated, then I said to him go out. Then he did, I looked at him, he seemed scared,everyone was watching us, so I kicked him not too hard, not too soft, waited for him to do something, he didn't then I get in the bus, so nothing happened. We were not enemies or something like that, I don't even remember what we argued about.

    In my adulthood, I also got in these heated arguments in a way that some thing could happen, but it didn't, I think gender is important, I am less likely to be attacked. Hence in those circumstances I would prefer to argue rather than guy doing it for me.

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    I'm a lot stronger than I or other people think. I have always won any physical confrontation. I'm a Warrior. I beat this dude arm wrestling once and he hated me for it. I was able to physically fight off three bullies before and I won the fight. Evil narcissistic LSE woman once tried to goad me into physically attacking her so she could charge me with a crime but I refused because I know it's wrong to hit women and how it looks to society even if they are unhealthy narcissists. ((but I battle her in fantasy because we both wanted to fight each other lol.)) If people were bullying me too badly cuz of my big heart I could use physicality to teach them boundaries. Before I learned to develop my own greater mental boundaries- which are ofc more important.

    I use Ni + Fe to avoid a lot of unnecessary physical confrontations and pick my battles wisely but will do it when necessary.

    I'm good with fighting cuz of 1D but valued Se that can be greatly improved when I focus on it- but the thing is life is not a physical battle. Life is about Te/Fi and how you can manipulate the outside world into thinking you're some caring moral self-confident person with a lot of money when in reality you're just a self-serving cunt.

    I really value Se dude. I *wish* we were allowed to fight more and law/justice was more Se than Te but it is what it is.

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    I didn't realize I was having a physical confrontantion. I was going up the stairs while 3 idiots spread to block my way. I thought they were retarded so I just tried to push one's arm out of my way (he was holding the stair thing). I don't remember well but I was only trying to push them out of my way. In the end they let me pass they were laughing about something. It took me multiple years later to realize they thought I had ballz or something. Another guy was stepping on my toes because I was wearing vibram finger shoes. He did that when he was passing me multiple times. I didn't feel anything and again thought he had some kind of mental disability. Later he said something along the lines that I'm too much of a pussy to fight him or say anything bad to him? He had been trying to provoke me. Even when he said that I couldn't comprehend what he's mad about or what I should be mad about for months. I've wanted to ruin their life since. Turns out they were nazi skinheads and european football fans.
    Last time 2 came as I was waiting on a bus stop. Aggressive rigid condescending posture, forceful demanding tone. Asking personal questions about me doing drugs, where I work or study. I had long hair, gay face, very cheap clothes and weigh 120 lbs. All indications I don't exert effort, am lazy, spend my time on drugs and video games, all related to being a parasytic member of society. I was just returning weak from working out at the street bars while nauseous after force feeding myself rancid butter for calories sleeping 14 hours a day consistently with brain damage I didn't know I had. "Sports is very important, you know." Remarking by worthlessness as a man. I didn't tell them I was exercising because it's none of their business on top of it being unbelievable. There was one of those cylinders that are like fenses so cars don't park on the sidewalk, that was removed from the ground, one grabbed it. I was in pain and high from the brain damage, soreness, tiredness, undersleeping and nausea, phasing in and out of blacking out, just to keep my body standing and get home. I don't know how adequate I was at speaking. What I do know is that I really didn't want to deescalate the situation but was too weak to move on top of probably being too weak to fight 2 at the same time. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming and it still feels unreal today. There was no one around it was dark. I hate my life so much. I didn't have what it takes to make them disabled. Society is made up of people like them, people enabling them, people responsible for my disability, people responsible for making it imposible to solve my disability while pushing it on others, people entitled to making me suffer, people punishing me for being punished.

    ESI was beaten up by people like them. Got jumped after his friend promised it's not dangerous to go there. Gay guy bruised swollen face. None of this gets on the news. Most people deny it's happening. Most people take being dinked in the head as no big deal. It's easy to live when you have no conscience nor sensitivity t o get in the way of becoming succecssful.

    A SLE told me to hit him full force in the abs. I hesitated the first few times. Even with full force it hurt me way more than it hurt him. His abs were thicker than my arm. My wrists are so thin LSI could snap them by twisting only using 2 of his fingers.
    i'm afraid it will hurt like hell, i am afraid of screaming and i am afraid of crying, i am afraid of forgetting but i'm not afraid of dying.

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    Once in high-school, a boy, to whom I hadn't spoken one word or even noticed, struck me hard from behind while I was washing my hands; I don't remember the actual fight but I hurt him so badly that ever since, I've gone out of my way to avoid conflict. Having martial arts experience, I got part-time jobs in security at university social events but never once got into physical altercations; I was always able to verbally diffuse the tense moments and later, I became relatively good at mediation in my professional career.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    I think it is in the posture and so on when it comes to aggressive confrontation. That's how even animals work most of the time. Blood is just a wasted resource. Prevention should be the key to actual success, IMO. Just appear bigger, stronger, whatever. Do I gather enough tension always? Probably not.
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    Tbh, I don’t understand physical confrontation. But I’m also like..5’3 and 110lbs, so it’s not like I’m that intimidating physically. I can be kinda snarky and sarcastic, but that’s about as far as I go aggression wise. I can also be blunt when I know I can get away with it but I don’t even get spiteful, just start ignoring people. Maybe it’s because I’m a 9
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    in 4th grade i ran away from this girl who wanted to beat me up at the end of every class. i don't remember why but i think it was that we had similar problems at home and there was this sense of that, and this was how she dealt with the angst. like she would say things that were true of my home life with an "well, at least i'm not in x situation" but i was like the only way you can know is if it's strikingly like your own home situation. anyway, i wasn't really upset at her and i liked that i had my one sports-like talent which was that i could sprint fast. she was taller too but it didn't matter.

    also in the 4th grade some kids wanted to beat me up and i gave a little speech about how none of this will matter 10 years from now and they probably won't even remember it, so why is whatever reason they want to beat me up so important, what do they think it will bring... i don't think they wanted to go all the way anyway, and they kind of blinked and left.

    but i mean i was scared in both of these situations, i was always scared. generally i don't want to get in a physical confrontation. so i will run, hide, seek protection, try to talk them out of it, etc. but most importantly avoid it from the start. i just had a horrible time in the 4th grade. my mom made me a horrifying bright flowery winter coat and i was teased a lot for being bad at PE (except running but that's not a team sport usually) and for my generally shitty clothes. it was a bad year.

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    Avoidance. Violent confrontations usually go awry for both parts, and nobody benefits from them. If it happens then I'd try to stop the confrontation by grappling the best I can so I can avoid legal problems for myself. Internally though I had some not nice confrontations in high school (nothing big of course) that left me with a strong internal fear of violent physical events I don't know why.

    You know what is far more effective in making you win a confrontation? Record the event, menace, or problem, and be the first to report it to an authority if that authority can deal with it, be it a school director, a labor union deputy, a police officer, or some shared contact with a say in the offender's sheenanigans.

    Some don't get properly punished and disciplined when they need to be in their childhood, and when they grow up think their whims and impulses are their rights or something. At the end is just a matter of education, someone who didn't have their childish huffs and tantrums controlled but have grown up to have an adult's body is not worth an injury, not even a minute of attention. There's nothing more pathethic than an adult starting a violent scene typical of a 6 years old because he didn't get his candy or toy.
    Last edited by RBRS; 09-28-2021 at 06:35 PM.

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    I prefer physical confrontation over verbal fighting or rulemongering, drawing in authorities or pathetic shit like that. I don't do well with words when I get angry, it's like the verbal center in the brain shuts down.
    I live in the most peaceful country in the world so there haven't really been any altercations worth mentioning for a long while, the only ones have been when the other party has backed down on threat of escalation to violence. Back in my old home country and as much younger there were some fights. Beating some people up is a valid tactic to make less people try to fuck with you, though honestly it's just exhilarating.

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    I definitely can't talk somebody out of wanting to beat me up, lol. How do you even do that? If somebody wants to fight me I'll immediately start thinking about how to defend myself. The thought of trying to peacefully sort it out doesn't even occur to me. Like I don't feel as if I can influence their actions.
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    Quote Originally Posted by fatgurl View Post
    I definitely can't talk somebody out of wanting to beat me up, lol. How do you even do that? If somebody wants to fight me I'll immediately start thinking about how to defend myself. The thought of trying to peacefully sort it out doesn't even occur to me. Like I don't feel as if I can influence their actions.
    This is from my experience.

    You can avoid a lot of fights by minding your manners and making sure you don't step on any toes. If a person wants to fight you, you never match their emotional intensity or go beyond it, but you should maintain a polite and calm tone.

    Never let them get too close, you can keep an arm between yourself and the person to stiff arm them away from you to maintain distance so you will be able to see a sucker punch easier.

    Don't appear afraid or angry (most importantly afraid), just stay calm and try to calm them down. This has worked for me in school and in Bars and such places where fights tend to happen. I also worked on a psych floor with violent patients that we had to restrain.

    However, this is all from experience being just by myself with some friends and no one to protect but myself. If someone slapped my girl's ass I'm going to have at least try to throw hands just to save face. So I should probably learn how to fight lol.
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    I can be temperamental and when i'm very angered at someone I'll need a physical outlet, but there is never a need to become violent at someone. The worst I've done was throwing dishes on the floor, slamming doors or throwing water at people's face. I like the thrill of confrontations and escalating, have been doing judo during uni, I've also liked to taunt people that were stronger than me and then I just run away bc I'm a coward lol. I think it has to do with being EP, DCNH creative subtype, cp648 tritype("triple reactive") and not sx-last probably. I've mellowed with time tho. Now when i'm angry I just go for a run so that's it.

    As to real fights, I had some when I was at elementary/middle school, but of course now I hate the idea of harming someone and trespassing on someone's bodily integrity. I got mugged while in Brazil some years ago and the 3 junkies just hit me because I refused to give my money(what was I thinking?). In the end they still got it lol. Just give dangerous people whatever they want right away lol

    From experience a fight is never worth it. People who act aggressive know that too, so best you can do is puff yourself up and not act threatening; most of the time they'll just go away.
    Last edited by lkdhf qkb; 09-28-2021 at 08:20 PM.

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    My ILI dad is really grouchy sometimes and gets in these pissy moods. He’s really mouthy, but then when confrontation starts, he backs off (lol husband has commented I am same way, swear the older I get, the more I turn into my dad) anyoway, I’ve never seen him physically fight with anyone, but he sure can get shitty. I’m suprised he doesn’t get punched more tbh.

    my mom is like a football player lol. She is ESE. I remember my mom and dad getting in a fight once and she pinned him against the wall lol she never hit me, but I could see her snapping under extreme circumstances.

    my husband (beta st) thinks the way to solve problems is to threaten to kick someone’s ass, kick someone’s ass, or kill them. Seems what he always says. I try to make sure it doesn’t get past the threaten stage
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    Quote Originally Posted by reverie View Post

    my husband (beta st) thinks the way to solve problems is to threaten to kick someone’s ass, kick someone’s ass, or kill them. Seems what he always says. I try to make sure it doesn’t get past the threaten stage
    Lool This reminded me of my dad. He was like this when I was younger. I remember some kid at school poked me in my eye once and I went home and told my parents. My dad told me that I should spit in their eye the next day looool
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    i forgot the worst one in 6th grade. my two friends who had flunked many years in a row, one who i liked and saw as a friend and the other who i was uncertain of and didn't trust, did something to me in the girl's restroom and i couldn't remember what it was. i was emotionally kind of in shock and then like devastated and i tried to remember exactly what had happened and started trying to piece it back together, but my imagination started filling it in. i couldn't admit i couldn't remember bc i was too ashamed for some reason that my memory failed. but i was quite terrible and attempted to report it... because i didn't know what to do and ugh i really regretted that too... but i think i got what i wanted out of it which was the girl i saw as more my friend, subtly was resolving it with me... it was that i couldn't communicate with her about it, i was too afraid, and i used the principal (the shame!)... but she was rather moved by my inability to remember what happened and confronted me about why i had lied, and i could see in her eyes when she realized from my pov i hadn't, and that i couldn't process what had happened... somehow this fixed everything and we never spoke of it again. anyway i just don't know what they did, it was probably something minor like shoving my head in the sink, i hope it wasn't the toilet... aaaaah. i feel like i had committed some offense and this was a lesson or something, but i never knew what i had done and well, then i couldn't even understand what had happened.

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    I got into fights because I always defended the kid getting bullied. Sometimes I could talk the bully out of it, sometimes the bully and I threw hands. And I never lost a fight. Pull my hair and end up with a broken finger. My IEI dad taught me kung fu and how to fight in general. Most kids don't really know how to fight and some fly into a blind rage....

    I don't like confrontation, but there's been times I couldn't get around it.

    As an adult I would most likely just block hits and attempt to restrain the person until they calmed down if I couldn't talk my way out of it.
    Last edited by chriscorey; 09-28-2021 at 09:23 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by fatgurl View Post
    Lool This reminded me of my dad. He was like this when I was younger. I remember some kid at school poked me in my eye once and I went home and told my parents. My dad told me that I should spit in their eye the next day looool
    lol

    once some guy was talking crap about my husband at school. they were on the football team together. as soon as practice started, he ran into the guy on the field, lifted him up and slammed him down, broke his collar bone and said, get up, bitch he ruined that guys high football chances, so I heard. He didn’t get in trouble for it, well, because it was football practice lol most people at school were afraid of him after that. It must have been bad. I didn’t see it.
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    What type do you think your dad is @fatgurl ?
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    Quote Originally Posted by reverie View Post
    What type do you think your dad is @fatgurl ?
    I've been thinking LSE
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    I do my best to avoid it. Se is really not a good function for me.

    That being said I remember @sbbds used to talk about seeing people's PoLR going into "super saiyan mode" when seriously pressured. At least for me that's true.

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    I’m too skinny and laidback to get into fights and it’s just not smart to beef with anyone in my area. I think self defense, being able to protect others and not being physically intimidated easily are valuable skills though
    Last edited by Averroes; 09-29-2021 at 03:40 PM.

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    ooh since i have to continue there was also the guy on the bus when i was 17 touching my hair... this one is um the best because i froze, i couldn't move, i couldn't speak, time slowed down to a crawl and i was paralyzed. finally the bus driver threw him off the bus. and i felt really really ashamed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by inumbra View Post
    ooh since i have to continue there was also the guy on the bus when i was 17 touching my hair... this one is um the best because i froze, i couldn't move, i couldn't speak, time slowed down to a crawl and i was paralyzed. finally the bus driver threw him off the bus. and i felt really really ashamed.
    I can relate. I've had instances where similar things happened to me and I reacted the same way.
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    ^@inumbra, in addition to your "forgetting", this sounds like some kind of PTSD experience.

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    Quote Originally Posted by inumbra View Post
    ooh since i have to continue there was also the guy on the bus when i was 17 touching my hair... this one is um the best because i froze, i couldn't move, i couldn't speak, time slowed down to a crawl and i was paralyzed. finally the bus driver threw him off the bus. and i felt really really ashamed.
    Quote Originally Posted by fatgurl View Post
    I can relate. I've had instances where similar things happened to me and I reacted the same way.

    This seriously makes me mad to read. I'm sorry this happened to you.
    With mind distracted, never thinking, "Death is coming,"
    To slave away on the pointless business of mundane life,
    And then to come out empty--it is a tragic error.
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    I shrink or freeze a lot of the time. I naturally back down and kinda make myself smaller and more submissive. Though l, that is with strangers and often because I feel really unsure if “I am in the right and can stand up”. It’s different if it involves my friends. What the hell no, im still nervous but fuck that shit is my friend.

    Siblings are a different story lol. A lot of is not type related for me, just a lot of feeling unsure. But when I am sure, it does not scare me and I will not back down….then I will go cry in the corner to relive the emotion later and ruminate lol. I really hate when people try and physically intimate me. I don’t want escalation and I don’t want to be walked over. Still learning to deal with that.



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    Freeze and try to appear calm and unbothered would be my strategy to deescalate until I could flee. I probably won't be fighting off any attackers with my frame, although it would be interesting to see what superhuman strength I could summon if necessary.

    I haven't had significant instances of violent confrontations, but in cases of unwanted sexual attention both in childhood and adulthood my automatic survival response was to freeze and wait it out since I was clearly weaker. As an adult, that turned into just being hypervigilant to avoid getting into those situations in the first place.

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    ooh since i have to continue there was also the guy on the bus when i was 17 touching my hair... this one is um the best because i froze, i couldn't move, i couldn't speak, time slowed down to a crawl and i was paralyzed. finally the bus driver threw him off the bus. and i felt really really ashamed.
    yeah Fight, Flee or Freeze. It's not just Fight or Flee- sometimes 'Freeze' comes in too. I sounded overly faux-positive and bad-ass in my last post but I have had my own freeze moments too. It doesn't make you weak or insecure- I think just sometimes this is the best over-all strategy. A lot of sexual sadists get more empowered when somebody fights back or runs away - when a person freezes, it actually can instill empathy back into them again and lowers their erection.

    I read VewyNarcissist's post lol- not trying to pick on the guy but it just sounded too edgy to be believable like it's too zap-noki 2012 troll-y. Like 'face it bnd a str8 male would ALWAYS win the fight against a gay male!' Haha no that just isn't true but society has instilled women/gay guys these mental victim complexes a lot. SJWness isn't the way to solve this but I understand.

    oh zap/n0ki whereever you are bud I hope you didn't die lol.

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    This is interesting. I see people on here who say they should back down, pretend it's not happening. This will not help you. I hear all the time that "Bullies are cowards" this is misguided. I have seen people get their ass kicked by standing up to bullies. They like to fight, they like to see you submit, either way, they will be happy.

    The best thing to do is to stand up for yourself and if you can't fight them off just keep them back so that you can run.

    I have seen small people win fights just by being more aggressive. This won't happen in all circumstances, but it gives you a much better chance than submission.

    I like it when people are submissive, it wouldn't turn me off at all. I know bullies would like it too.

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    Fight, flight, or freeze have been proven to be automatic survival responses that are often beyond the realm of conscious choice.

    The "freeze" option might not actually be helpful in a certain situation or with a certain person, but it's hardwired. What you do in the present could also be linked to past trauma and how you survived back in the day, even if it's not helpful now.

    People often blame themselves for how they react to being victimized ("why didn't I just run or fight back?") but the body usually just chooses a response for you until you train yourself to do something different.

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    I've never been in an actual serious fight. Schoolyard fights, boxing in the ring, sure, but not like a street fight. Too many things can go wrong in a street fight.

    An SEE I know once got punched in the face at a bar. He simply took it and said, "I'm not going to fight you." There was no fight. I feel this is a good response to anyone looking for a fight, unless there was serious intent on injuring you or taking your life, in which case I would run like hell.

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