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Thread: Emotional Kryptonite - The Emotion You're Most Afraid To Feel

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    Lightbulb Emotional Kryptonite - The Emotion You're Most Afraid To Feel

    https://nickwignall.com/emotional-kryptonite/
    TL;DR is that by avoiding certain feelings, you suffer more than if you just took on the feeling head on.

    I found this very interesting because I find that this could be a major theme in my life. I used to feel incredible pity for people with anxiety disorders because I remember it as "the worst feeling ever" when I was younger. This has become such a massive denial of emotion to the point where I'm failing school because I don't give enough of a damn to do anything. Some time ago, I was at least aware of this on some level and went on a "panic quest" - to experience something that would scare me enough to give me a panic attack. I think I on some level avoided things that would actually work because I was afraid of being afraid, if that makes sense. What do you guys think?

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    I don't consciously feel anxious myself, but I'm an LIE e8 I'm and built to calm the anxiety of ESIs. Have you ever hung out with an SLI Dual? They are pretty chill and I think that would calm you down a bit.

    SLIs prepare so well for any eventuality and they usually have enough hoard resources to power through any problems, so I think you could profit from being around one.

    They MIGHT even be good at bouncing ideas off of, although they aren't deep emotional thinkers.

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    it's kinda a tie between shame, guilt/remorse and envy. unfortunately i feel them all, all the time. i try to mitigate guilt as much as possible. i kinda just acknowledge envy and the Terrible Longing as part of the pain of the human existence. i feel like i deserve my shame.

    as a young child i was pretty ravaged by envy and that led me to do things that would make me feel guilty and the guilt would tear and tear at me. i pretty quickly learned how to stop doing the things creating this problem because i couldn't bear the emotional consequences in my mind.

    there have been times when fear/panic/anxiety are really active, but it seems to fluctuate and i think actually i might repress fear sometimes--i remember taking some official psychological evaluation years ago that showed my personality is kinda strongly ruled by anxiety/fear but at the time, i was experiencing acute anxiety/fear. in the past i realized i repressed love, but my problems have evolved since then... i'm curious about the light buried under the darkness. anger is also messed up, it's a problem of not knowing what to do with it.

    i would say my most dominant state is sadness/melancholy/depression.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    I don't consciously feel anxious myself, but I'm an LIE e8 I'm and built to calm the anxiety of ESIs. Have you ever hung out with an SLI Dual? They are pretty chill and I think that would calm you down a bit.

    SLIs prepare so well for any eventuality and they usually have enough hoard resources to power through any problems, so I think you could profit from being around one.

    They MIGHT even be good at bouncing ideas off of, although they aren't deep emotional thinkers.
    Nope I've never been close to a Dual I believe. I don't really know why I'm so unconsciously anxious. Perhaps it could be tied to my gender issues.

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    Second-hand helplessness. Watching people stay in abusive relationships, get exploited, brainwashed, preyed on etc.

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    The emotion I'm most afraid to feel is contentment.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

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    Quote Originally Posted by one View Post
    Really? Why?

    It feels like I'm dying, there's nothing to look forward to.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

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    Loneliness

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    Quote Originally Posted by Keymaster View Post
    I found this very interesting because I find that this could be a major theme in my life. I used to feel incredible pity for people with anxiety disorders because I remember it as "the worst feeling ever" when I was younger. This has become such a massive denial of emotion to the point where I'm failing school because I don't give enough of a damn to do anything. Some time ago, I was at least aware of this on some level and went on a "panic quest" - to experience something that would scare me enough to give me a panic attack. I think I on some level avoided things that would actually work because I was afraid of being afraid, if that makes sense. What do you guys think?
    As someone with anxiety, I still have problems with doing things. I become panicked easily and I end up paralized by fear, overthinking every detail. So I can tell you from the other side of the problem, that this approach won't probably bring you closer to your goals Maybe instead of trying to motivate yourself with a stick, you could find a carrot? Is there a way to make learning fun?

    The emotion I fear the most: abandonment and probably rejection

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    Quote Originally Posted by lkdhf qkb View Post
    As someone with anxiety, I still have problems with doing things. I become panicked easily and I end up paralized by fear, overthinking every detail. So I can tell you from the other side of the problem, that this approach won't probably bring you closer to your goals Maybe instead of trying to motivate yourself with a stick, you could find a carrot? Is there a way to make learning fun?

    The emotion I fear the most: abandonment and probably rejection
    Abandonment is my biggest fear, too.

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    I think I'm most afraid of feeling unwanted, rejected and excluded.
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    I feel like my greatest fear is everyone I know dying, living on the streets, rejected, homeless, and having to fend for myself. Helplessness?

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    abandonment

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eudaimonia View Post
    It feels like I'm dying, there's nothing to look forward to.
    You are a 7w6.

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    Quote Originally Posted by roger557 View Post
    You are a 7w6.

    I don't think so.
    The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.

    The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eudaimonia View Post
    I don't think so.
    Then you have it in the trifix most likely.

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    She said she was afraid feel contentment and 7 wants feel happy and content, right.. But 7 probably is in her tritype. 9w8 or 8w9 gut
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    The feeling of permanent loss of some aspect of myself.

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    Chemical depression. Literally nothing you can do about it without medication. When it's not a physical issue it can be worked through and isn't a big deal. Feelings come and go, big whoop. Chemical depression comes and never goes in the same way.


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