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Thread: Sugar daddy/ sugar baby relationships

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    Marx would say that this relationship, by turning intimacy into a commodity that can be exchanged for material rewards is a form of reification, i.e. both the sugar daddy and the sugar baby become mere 'objects', which produce 'intimacy services' or 'material support'; these services become the focus point of the relationship, it's a business transaction. This of course can only lead to alienation, as both people are not seen or see themselves for who they are, but only what they can give. Alienation is the opposite of love.

    In Marxist theory, objectification refers to the reversal of the relationship of people producing for one another in a division of labor into an objectified (reified) relationship of commodities to one another. Under capitalist production relations, the products of labor take on the form of commodities, money, and capital, and as such become independent of their actual producers. This process is also called alienation of the producer from the product and of the producers from each other.
    EDIT: the temptation to bring up Marx was too strong, couldn't help myself lol but I think in substance he is saying about the same thing as the people in this thread.
    Last edited by lkdhf qkb; 09-17-2021 at 10:38 AM.

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    I've watched interviews with former sex workers, but there isn't a consensus on whether or not it's a good thing. Some were completely traumatized by it, whereas others found it empowering. I really have no idea what to think about about it, especially as a man (whose understanding of women's real feelings is entirely theoretical).

    I'll say this, though: the glorification of sex work might be problematic. For a naive teenager, is eighteen really the best age to make life-altering decisions?

    Sex-negative feminists say that it opens the door to sexual abuse and trafficking. Marxist feminists sometimes add that it commodifies the woman's body, which is in itself a form of violence. But I suspect that the objection is deeper and more visceral. I seriously believe that most women recoil in horror at the idea of selling your body — to the point that sex producers and consumers (and maybe the sex workers as well) seem like subhuman mega-creeps to them — and that even liberal, sex positive feminists (the type that are currently in control of academia) secretly hate it, and only support it because it lines up with liberal dogma WRT. bodily autonomy.
    Last edited by xerx; 09-26-2021 at 08:56 AM. Reason: ...

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    According to this, young women, especially feminist women, are turning away from sex-positivity, mostly as a reaction to hookup culture and extreme porn: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/09/24/o...-feminism.html. Seems interesting if true.
    Last edited by xerx; 09-26-2021 at 09:04 AM.

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    I've watched interviews with former sex workers, but there isn't a consensus on whether or not it's a good thing. Some were completely traumatized by it, whereas others found it empowering.
    Yeah no shit - and everything in life is like that. A lot of non-sexual things people said would be good for me were nothing but traumatizing to me as well. They were just perhaps good for *them* but they didn't have the empathy to see outside of their own perspective. And I don't fully blame them- because that is actually not that easy to do.

    In the end I think it's good if people keep their nose out of other people's business [see the funny lady in my avatar] as long as they aren't doing anything illegal or non-consensual. I also don't think it's wise to mix 'sex positivity' with actual sex work or monetizing sexuality. One implies you are having great sex with people you consent with while the other you are doing it for money which is more likely to turn into something immoral or soulless to me. 'The love of money is the root of all evil' after all. I do agree that for a lot of people it has a tendency to not be a good thing but at the same time, being jealous that another person had an enjoyable orgasm with somebody they were attracted to and you didn't (and falsely claiming it's 'sexual abuse' just because you are jelly) is just being immature.

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    If I was attractive I'd def consider. When all the doors are open why prematurely shut?

    When none are open one clings.

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    I watched this short documentary about a Finnish sex worker. She doesn't seem like the typical prostitute. She is young, good looking and smart and not a drug addict. Seems nice and normal. She sells sex because it's easier than working in a bar. She's a student.

    No subtitles but here's a summary of what she says:

    - She is picky about her customers and only chooses men who treat her well.
    - The sex is often good, from average to really great.
    - If she has 1-2 men each day for a week she can take the rest of the month off.
    - She gets more respect from men in this work than from working in a bar.
    - She disagrees with the general view that prostitutes are being taken advantage of. She is the one who has power.
    - It's not that different from normal dating.
    - She wants to get to know the men a little before sex. They talk for awhile and then go over to her bed.
    - Kissing is ok, but no weird or kinky stuff

    I think it's all about being good looking and in the position that you can choose whom you sleep with.

    Not sure about her type, but EP seems right.
    Last edited by Tallmo; 09-26-2021 at 02:58 PM.
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

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    We all sell ourselves in some way or another, but it doesn't mean we should celebrate it.
    “You are the music while the music lasts.”
    ― T.S. Eliot




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    I'm sugar free.

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    I don't mind taking care of a woman financially, as long as she is only having sex with me. That just seems like a traditional marriage to me.

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    I know this one woman that gets paid 2000 a week to just talk to the guy...
    If they ever tryna neck, I'll put my foot up in your caca
    Call your mama and your papa
    Like I'm finna take your dadda
    Turn that bitch into a soccer ball and rocka, rocka, rocka (brrr)
    Get into it like a suit
    And fuck a stack up like a broker

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    I’ve been a sugar momma to my sister ESE to my friends SEI not type related. If you’re in the position to help someone why not???
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    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluto View Post
    I don't mind taking care of a woman financially, as long as she is only having sex with me. That just seems like a traditional marriage to me.
    Pretty much is, but you're leaving out the most important part. It ain't about the money or the sex in the ultimate end. It's about them fulfilling your deepest and most personal needs. Y'know, being intimate with you. A real, healthy marriage is all about the intimacy of which sex is merely a part. Of course you don't mind forking over the bill for the family's food, rent, and security because your wife is, on top of being loyal to you sexually is: cooking the food, raising the kids, keeping a whole network of other families whose hubbies you are close friends with up and running in a mutual support network all without you even having to prompt her to do so, etc.

    The big problem is so many sugar daddies nowadays only care about the access to punani over what said rock hard pussy used to pledge to provide to a worthy man in exchange to what a Tier-1 10/10 man implicitly pledged to the object of his affections that caused her to just utterly submit to him and his equally rock hard rod.

    I'm here all week folks .

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eudaimonia View Post
    We all sell ourselves in some way or another, but it doesn't mean we should celebrate it.
    You should if you sell/offer yourself well my dude. All relationships are ultimately transactional. My own with my God included. Is it a healthy/rational transaction though? That's the real question.

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    Quote Originally Posted by one View Post
    For me it's because if my "love" can be bought, having the same feelings and behavior towards the one I really love doesn't mean anything anymore. There are just some things you don't sell for the same reason.
    I don't think there's anything wrong with selling love; only for selling it for something as cheap as money.
    Views and clicks make these grow.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    I don't think there's anything wrong with selling love; only for selling it for something as cheap as money.
    Well instead of money what are you thinking of selling it for?
    Last edited by one; 10-02-2021 at 09:09 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by one View Post
    Well instead of money what are you thinking of selling it for?
    Fidelity, physical pleasure, and/or interesting conversation work.
    Views and clicks make these grow.

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    Quote Originally Posted by End View Post
    You should if you sell/offer yourself well my dude. All relationships are ultimately transactional. My own with my God included. Is it a healthy/rational transaction though? That's the real question.

    Transactional relationships are a lower form of love. When love is given freely in excess, without notice or care for its expenditure, it allows an individual to sacrifice themselves for love.

    A wasteful excess that allows for a person to love another to death.
    “You are the music while the music lasts.”
    ― T.S. Eliot




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    ah yes using someone elses love and affection to get yourself access to their resources the classic female tactics
    ~ ESTP ~ SLE ~ 7w8 ~ Sp/Sx ~ Fire ~ Aries ~ Beta ~ Gryffindor ~ Summer ~ SLUEN ~

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    Fidelity, physical pleasure, and/or interesting conversation work.
    @FreelancePoliceman, would you consider dating a blonde ESE who drives a red convertible and is happy, healthy, financially secure and a clinical psychologist who said she values fidelity and is looking for a loquacious and straightforward man?

    Would you date her if she’s ten or fifteen years older than you?

    Asking for a friend.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    @FreelancePoliceman, would you consider dating a blonde ESE who drives a red convertible and is happy, healthy, financially secure and a clinical psychologist who said she values fidelity and is looking for a loquacious and straightforward man?

    Would you date her if she’s ten or fifteen years older than you?

    Asking for a friend.
    As I’ve said, I’m not sure duality is optimal for marriage, but I’d probably be willing to date her at least. Loquacious, eh, I can try to be; I’m not sure if I’d qualify. Why; do you have one? Lol.
    Views and clicks make these grow.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    As I’ve said, I’m not sure duality is optimal for marriage, but I’d probably be willing to date her at least. Loquacious, eh, I can try to be; I’m not sure if I’d qualify. Why; do you have one? Lol.
    Yes. She contacted me on Match and said “I like your straightforward manner (in my profile) and here is my phone number.”
    I looked at her pictures, decided “ESE”, then called her.

    In a twenty minute conversation, we decided that we are each terrific people but not terrific for each other. She asked me to help her find a mate, and I met this LII at Kinko’s who looks OK, but he’s probably 10-15 years younger than her.
    Hence my question.

    I was just trying to find out if an LII would date older, and thanks for your answer, but she’s even further away from you than 15 years. She’s probably your mother’s age.

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    Ксеркс, царь царей xerx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xerx View Post
    According to this, young women, especially feminist women, are turning away from sex-positivity, mostly as a reaction to hookup culture and extreme porn: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/09/24/o...-feminism.html. Seems interesting if true.
    Just realized that there's a paywall. Here's an archived version: https://web.archive.org/web/20210924...-feminism.html

  23. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Yes. She contacted me on Match and said “I like your straightforward manner (in my profile) and here is my phone number.”
    I looked at her pictures, decided “ESE”, then called her.

    In a twenty minute conversation, we decided that we are each terrific people but not terrific for each other. She asked me to help her find a mate, and I met this LII at Kinko’s who looks OK, but he’s probably 10-15 years younger than her.
    Hence my question.

    I was just trying to find out if an LII would date older, and thanks for your answer, but she’s even further away from you than 15 years. She’s probably your mother’s age.
    Lol. Personally speaking I don't think I'd mind having a sort of informal relationship with an older woman, but for a committed relationship/marriage I'd prefer a woman who's in a similar or younger stage of life. 15 years is pushing it, but I'd be at least willing to give it a try.
    Views and clicks make these grow.

  24. #64
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    There are parallels to marriage and relationships but it's ultimately an agreement. Is it exploitative? Maybe to some, but I would say most actions are exploitative in one way or another.

    Anyways the dynamic somewhat appeals to me (as either the baby or momma).

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    The biggest issue within sugar daddy/baby relations is the pesky issue of who'll become a diabetic first

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