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Thread: Some Relation more Favorable than Others?

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    The Chosen Prophet. Braingel's Avatar
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    Default Some Relation more Favorable than Others?

    Even in nature, almost nothing if ever, is symmetrical. You see eyes that are enlarged on one side, narrower on the other.. Leaves are rarely sized same, as too are branches.

    I think enneagram type may have a role. Take an IEI enneagram 6, who may not as much want of an SLE's pressure.. They may want someone more who guides them, taking comfort of a more lenient supervisor or a beneficiary who appreciates of them.. An enneagram 4 as myself may respond to someone better who sees us for who we are and sees us as unique, thus heightening compatibility with a dual..

    But I think some relations may be more beneficial than that of others, in comparison to others who have the dynamic. Society values Te/Fi mostly.. If someone is constantly beat up by society over being PolR in such matter, an Fi or te base may seriously help such person who is deficit, in life functioning..

    I don't think it is universally equal in what each dynamic is, because equality seldom exists by nature.
    I am in my head; not society.

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    The Chosen Prophet. Braingel's Avatar
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    Another example with me, is for instance, my beneficiary, the LII. With my specific circumstance of childhood abuse and lacking parental figure, it has been very beneficial for me to me close to an older LII. It is indeed an unequal relation of him giving more to me, and also admiring me and I subconsciously, not consciously as he does, give him my Fe, but that should be case in a parent-child dynamic..

    Even though IEI typically is not supposed to gain anything, I do with my specific conditions in life. He is the best person, aside from maybe an older IEI, who can fill this role for me... Someone who will not be as harsh as a supervisor would be, but who is interested enough in the person and ok with less reciprocity.

    He fits the dynamic with me like a text book. But what does not is the typical IEI not gaining as much or caring about the relation, even if I am indifferent to him on some levels and he just drills into me more, and I look away (I am saying this does happen a bit).. It still is extremely beneficial for me with my age and my lacking of parent, to have someone like this. Though I suppose ITR generally does not factor in special circumstances, as with child abuse/lacking a parent.
    I am in my head; not society.

    Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am.​ Also, a brain angel. (But Zelda's incarnate too).


    My thoughts align with action to succeed what needs…


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    The Chosen Prophet. Braingel's Avatar
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    I gain more from the dynamic in the matter of having a parent, and he gains more from me at a subconscious level. Me giving him my Fe subconsciously without try, and him receiving it subconsciously, whereas he consciously gives me the parental/mentoring role, and I consciously take that, but also it does fill a subconscious void in me as well, with my having lacked parent and needing and seeking that out, an in me gaping hole and deficit.
    I am in my head; not society.

    Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am.​ Also, a brain angel. (But Zelda's incarnate too).


    My thoughts align with action to succeed what needs…


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    Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum


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    The Chosen Prophet. Braingel's Avatar
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    I think some relations may also be more favorable in specific roles, such as parent-child... Socionics mostly averts on friendship and romanticism. The benefit and the identical relations are probably the best for a parent-child, and possibly the dual and activity ones as well.

    A parent-child relation is meant to be one-sided; asymmetrical. As is one of a teacher, ora therapist/mentor role...
    I am in my head; not society.

    Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am.​ Also, a brain angel. (But Zelda's incarnate too).


    My thoughts align with action to succeed what needs…


    Dragons:

    Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum


    My favorite adult Museum Exhibits:

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    I think we transition through life from when we first become interested in relations of sexual nature to choosing a long term partner and even when we make relationship mistakes in trial and error ways. We transition. I know I have changed personally. I have make my own repetitive dating errors in dating three ISTP in a row and two ISTJ in a row and two ESTP in a row. I mean they were not serious and some were not sexual but they were those stepping stones to consciously realizing that all along the most easy and comfortable relationship were the duals who kept in touch with me. They were there all along when I was making my many dual dating escapades. Yeah. Interesting how life works and how much we realize when we are not searching or looking but just observing.
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    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Braingel View Post
    I gain more from the dynamic in the matter of having a parent, and he gains more from me at a subconscious level. Me giving him my Fe subconsciously without try, and him receiving it subconsciously, whereas he consciously gives me the parental/mentoring role, and I consciously take that, but also it does fill a subconscious void in me as well, with my having lacked parent and needing and seeking that out, an in me gaping hole and deficit.
    Any good relationship is about guidance and not “control.” Control is a disease of some kind. It’s not healthy. We are not owned by anyone but God and we just share our time here on earth.

    Quote Originally Posted by Braingel View Post
    I think some relations may also be more favorable in specific roles, such as parent-child... Socionics mostly averts on friendship and romanticism. The benefit and the identical relations are probably the best for a parent-child, and possibly the dual and activity ones as well.

    A parent-child relation is meant to be one-sided; asymmetrical. As is one of a teacher, ora therapist/mentor role...
    Socionics likes to say INFJ can be an “infantile” or take on a “child like” helpless quality and I have limitations as a mom who friggin works full time and has a toddler but ain’t no man on the planet who is my parent that I’m dating lol. No way! I have the attitude of “say what you want and give me time to think about it and if I work out the details to the satisfaction of the long term goal I will go with it!”

    Take this one for instance (I love to give examples). This is just an example
    Estj tells me “let’s move to the cabin in the mountains where the child will have a better life” with no details about how on God’s earth we will support ourselves. Mind you that’s just an IDEA that they are throwing out there. I spell out what will happen if we don’t end up finding an adequate job and means of living within a certain period of time and “pop” the idealistic vision and have things go back to a more manageable or rather realistic way for all of us. For the time being.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    What people see in others and have to cope with is mostly baggage; some have more of it than others and it's definitely asymmetrical. Type is often masked or completely obscured by baggage and it's much more difficult to match baggage handlers than types. People get together and some stay together for the damnedest reasons - a primary one being self-preservation and whatever that may entail.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Oh for sure. I don’t think every dual or positive Reaktion is meant to click. I think ILE 7‘s can be fun but long term compatibility is not there. Also if they are social first, I don’t seem to be able to click with social dominates for closeness and romantic compatibility. Also gotta take in background, values etc…. ILE-Ne can be fun and I like being around them but not for long-term compatibility. As a Fe-sub, I find it doesn’t mesh well and there is too much irrationality. Most duals will be helpful but I think there are a few out there that will really click and fit best.



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    Irrational dual pairs are harder to make a real relationship to work I think- also ime too many IEIs become infatuated by the SLE and overly sexualize each other instead of respecting each other as well. I have seen too many IEIs get involved with SLEs only to then become bitter and jaded by them later on. I mean no relationship will work if one person is codependent and has too low of self-esteem and the other person is a narcissist.

    Even though a real relationship with me and a SLE never fully materialized, they are still the type I fall in love with the most. For reasons that aren't about infatuation or sexual. A lot this pairing can have issues with lust ime... it's important to understand duality isn't really about lust. Although it's not not about it either probably.

    I don't think a LIE would be good for me personally- other people have said that before, but I don't see it happening- it would be annoying because the supervision would seem like they could be my aggressors but both of us are Victims and it's like a thing where I want them to slap me in the face but instead they talk to me about the stock market or something.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BandD View Post
    Irrational dual pairs are harder to make a real relationship to work I think- also ime too many IEIs become infatuated by the SLE and overly sexualize each other instead of respecting each other as well. I have seen too many IEIs get involved with SLEs only to then become bitter and jaded by them later on. I mean no relationship will work if one person is codependent and has too low of self-esteem and the other person is a narcissist.

    Even though a real relationship with me and a SLE never fully materialized, they are still the type I fall in love with the most. For reasons that aren't about infatuation or sexual. A lot this pairing can have issues with lust ime... it's important to understand duality isn't really about lust. Although it's not not about it either probably.

    I don't think a LIE would be good for me personally- other people have said that before, but I don't see it happening- it would be annoying because the supervision would seem like they could be my aggressors but both of us are Victims and it's like a thing where I want them to slap me in the face but instead they talk to me about the stock market or something.
    I’ve dated three IEI-Fe’s. I wanted to fuck the brains out of the first one and she didn’t want to have anything to do with me. At the time, she was hanging out with a teenage gay male SLE, and last I talked to her, she was dating a male IEI.
    I liked the second one as a friend, and because she is smart as hell and simply amazing with people, and she wanted marriage but I knew that was a bad idea.

    I met the third one on Match and we went out a few times and she kept telling me she was great in bed and I kept pointing her at SLEs and we both got frustrated by the other, so we stopped seeing each other.

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    The Chosen Prophet. Braingel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BandD View Post
    Irrational dual pairs are harder to make a real relationship to work I think- also ime too many IEIs become infatuated by the SLE and overly sexualize each other instead of respecting each other as well. I have seen too many IEIs get involved with SLEs only to then become bitter and jaded by them later on. I mean no relationship will work if one person is codependent and has too low of self-esteem and the other person is a narcissist.

    Even though a real relationship with me and a SLE never fully materialized, they are still the type I fall in love with the most. For reasons that aren't about infatuation or sexual. A lot this pairing can have issues with lust ime... it's important to understand duality isn't really about lust. Although it's not not about it either probably.

    I don't think a LIE would be good for me personally- other people have said that before, but I don't see it happening- it would be annoying because the supervision would seem like they could be my aggressors but both of us are Victims and it's like a thing where I want them to slap me in the face but instead they talk to me about the stock market or something.

    My mom is codependent and my father narcissistic.. they will be married upcoming 23 years. They married after 6 weeks... My mom caves into my father, though. And gets toxic her own self
    I am in my head; not society.

    Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am.​ Also, a brain angel. (But Zelda's incarnate too).


    My thoughts align with action to succeed what needs…


    Dragons:

    Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum


    My favorite adult Museum Exhibits:

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