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Thread: Are Alpha's Territorial People?

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    Question Are Alpha's Territorial People?

    Hello Alpha's!

    Okay, this is a question that I have been pondering! I can get very territorial over my space and things in my life at times. While I am often very happy to share in abundance and happily treat people, I get protective of items that I consider "mine". I don't like people coming into my room and I often don't like sharing very personal things (specific items, thoughts, opinion, ideas, artwork, etc) because I consider those things sacred and not to be messed with. Those are the few things in life that I don't have to be aware of how those 'sacred' things interact with the world and I have to react according. Aka there are few things in life that allow me to shut off my brain and enjoy without someone coming to spoil it. There are very few hills I will die on but this is one of them. Anything other that I deem "sacred', can be happily and freely shared.

    I have met a lot of different people and not many are as 'territorial' as I get with things like this. For example, I am always nervous going into people's home as I feel as I am violating someone's happy space or sacred space. I don't want to mess with it. I can't be the only alpha lol!

    So, are you guys territorial too?
    Last edited by MissDucki; 05-25-2021 at 11:57 AM.

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    Idk if it has anything to do with being an Alpha but I relate to a lot of what you said. I also don't share my thoughts with people sometimes because they're MINE, lol. I don't like people coming to my house, not even friends, I hate when people touch my stuff. I feel as if they're intruding in some way. Like you said, it has to be something sacred to me.
    Chronic "grass is always greener" syndrome




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    Reinin dichotomies seem to be a little controversial, but the yielding/obstinate dichotomy might have to do with what you're talking about. It's interesting that you use the word "sacred" as the article does. It also seems like your description would be more accurate of an obstinate type, but I don't think that dichotomy is really fleshed out well, so just take what it says with a grain of salt.

    Anyway, my experience is that ILEs and SEIs are generally more territorial than the other two, though most people of any type would be annoyed if someone took/broke/messed up their stuff!

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    Reinin dichotomies seem to be a little controversial, but the yielding/obstinate dichotomy might have to do with what you're talking about. It's interesting that you use the word "sacred" as the article does.
    I have read some of those dichotomies! I am curious to why they are controversial though?
    Aha! For me, it was either I use 'sacred' or 'my precious' I thought sacred would be much more appropriate even though I tend to refer to my sacred things as 'my precious'

    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post

    Anyway, my experience is that ILEs and SEIs are generally more territorial than the other two, though most people of any type would be annoyed if someone took/broke/messed up their stuff!
    I agree, I think there are a lot of different types that can be territorial or protective over their things. I think most people would be annoyed as well and its human nature. I am always curious to see where the threshold of people for what is considered 'normal' and abnormal'.
    For example, I was raised to be abundant and share things. Especially with friends and family and I do value that. However, I remember one specific time as a teenager that my mom got really upset with me for not sharing my onion rings with a friend. I was fantasizing about those onion rings all week and I just saved up enough money to thoroughly enjoy them. When my friend asked me for them, I said no. Usually I share my food but naw those were mine and I am indulging. I thought it was appropriate but my mom got upset with me about not sharing which surprised me. I didn't feel bad but I've had reactions that are surprising when I don't want to share or I don't want people coming into my space. I don't know if my reaction is more then average of being territorial of anything deemed 'sacred' or 'my precious"

    Personally, I would not think 'stereotypically' that alpha's are territorial. I would kinda assume that Se types would be more territorial. I don't know enough Alpha's though to see a pattern. Though it is interesting that you say that SEI and ILE are more territorial from your perspective.
    Last edited by MissDucki; 05-25-2021 at 12:12 PM.

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    I have some things that I will give or share at the drop of a hat, and some things that like you said, I need to know are protected and safe in order to retain my mental sanity.

    Alphas in general are thought of as the least territorial/protective of all the quadras (as a whole - there are types in other quadras that are as or less territorial), so I'd bet this is something most people have (other quadras are just way more serious and intense about it).

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    I am overly sharing about certain things and territorial about some other things. I don't like when someone is using my computer or phone and sometimes people have to, in those times, I look at the screen with them in order to see what they are seeing, so I can take it back if they are attempting to see something that I don't want them to see. It is not that I hide some certain things from certain people. However, I think web history, personal messages could reveal too much in terms of subconcious or may reveal things that I want to keep it to myself. It just feels like giving them a ticket to freely wonder in my mind.

    I try to make people comfortable when they come to my house. However, if someone is openning drawers etc, that also keeps me on alert. Again not because there is something in them, because I think that person have potential to enter or open places that I don't want them to open. If someone is openning a kitchen drawer to get something, that is totally fine though. When I go to other people's house, I am very careful about what I am doing, I was also like that as kid, however I don't always behave exactly the same way, my behaviors changes according to the people who live there. I also don't want a person who betrayed to me in my home. In the past, when I was sharing a flat, it happened and it felt like a violation and I made it a big deal. This could be sp thing, however, I also think home is a sacred place.

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    I don't really think I notice territorially stuff all that often. Aside from not stealing stuff or acting suspicious near my stuff, I'm fine with it. The whole "sacred space" thing also makes absolutely no sense to me, usually I'll find something that makes me happy(or really any other interesting feeling), and exhaust it until it becomes boring, then move on, typically sharing it instead of holding it to myself. Out of the things you listed, "specific items, thoughts, opinion, ideas, artwork", Items and artwork are reasonable, but a bit weird, but thoughts, opinions, and ideas being something sacred sounds almost morally disgusting to me. I share everything that I find interesting and expect other people to do it too.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Baqer View Post
    I don't really think I notice territorially stuff all that often. Aside from not stealing stuff or acting suspicious near my stuff, I'm fine with it. The whole "sacred space" thing also makes absolutely no sense to me, usually I'll find something that makes me happy(or really any other interesting feeling), and exhaust it until it becomes boring, then move on, typically sharing it instead of holding it to myself. Out of the things you listed, "specific items, thoughts, opinion, ideas, artwork", Items and artwork are reasonable, but a bit weird, but thoughts, opinions, and ideas being something sacred sounds almost morally disgusting to me. I share everything that I find interesting and expect other people to do it too.
    I am always curious about why people feel comfortable not having a 'sacred space' because I cant imagine my life without it. Bit of a foreign concept to me. I find it really interesting how you view thoughts, opinions, and ideas being sacred sounds almost morally disgusting to you. I have never considered that perspective.

    I'll clarify on my reasoning. Generally, I am happy to share thoughts, ideas, and opinions. Just sometimes I know I can't freely share everything around specific company because I don't know what they will do with that information. Information is always a good thing and I would never actively hide this information from others when it can be beneficial or improvement. In a perfect world I would comfortably share. However, I had people use that information against me and didn't credit it so I am wary at this point. I also have people emotionally react to innocent perspective or thoughts that I was just giving out on a pure information base that I was not expecting. I just get wary in general from the emotional response I will get from sharing my own opinion, thoughts, and perspective on things. I'm protective of my items, wary of my owns ideas etc and I consider both sacred because I don't know how the outside world is going to respond to them. More so, I don't know if they were under attack, I am scared I would not able to defend and win.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MissDucki View Post
    In a perfect world I would comfortably share. However, I had people use that information against me and didn't credit it so I am wary at this point. I also have people emotionally react to innocent perspective or thoughts that I was just giving out on a pure information base that I was not expecting. I just get wary in general from the emotional response I will get from sharing my own opinion, thoughts, and perspective on things. I'm protective of my items, wary of my owns ideas etc and I consider both sacred because I don't know how the outside world is going to respond to them. More so, I don't know if they were under attack, I am scared I would not able to defend and win.
    Ah, there's the SEI. The concerns you have seem reasonable, though I personally don't really remember information being used against me. Either way I'll still have to share it with someone, so typically I'll find someone to talk to it about in the end. And I have no problems with defending my ideas too, though I try not to favor me own too much.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Baqer View Post
    Ah, there's the SEI. The concerns you have seem reasonable, though I personally don't really remember information being used against me. Either way I'll still have to share it with someone, so typically I'll find someone to talk to it about in the end. And I have no problems with defending my ideas too, though I try not to favor me own too much.
    I like to be upfront about my weakness and anxieties in hoping that sharing that information it can be avoided or accounted for in situations. I would like to know the same to protect that in others. Most haven't used this information against me, but I've had close people that have and for there own gain.

    I've notice IXE users need a lot of verbal input or information to bounce off other people and are very comfortable moving within those frameworks. They just need someone or something to bounce ideas or information off of to process. There is an easy verbal flexibility and it can move quick. I am always amazed by dominate Ne users, I just can't move as quickly, absorb, understand, and be flexible with the external information or framework as quickly. It takes a lot of time for me to absorb and play with the information in my head for awhile. If I am not an expert in that topic or I haven't acquired enough information about a specific topic, I feel vulnerable in that area and it can be a struggle to debate or defend verbally. I value it and want to, just I know how weak it is for me. I am really aware of it when it comes to the topics of logistics. It takes me such a long time for me to type out my thoughts or reply's on here lol! That's where the magic of dualizing comes in!

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    Quote Originally Posted by MissDucki View Post
    I have read some of those dichotomies! I am curious to why they are controversial though?
    They aren't really fleshed out, and the number of types they cover and is so large and often so different it makes them difficult to describe.

    For example, I was raised to be abundant and share things. Especially with friends and family and I do value that. However, I remember one specific time as a teenager that my mom got really upset with me for not sharing my onion rings with a friend. I was fantasizing about those onion rings all week and I just saved up enough money to thoroughly enjoy them. When my friend asked me for them, I said no. Usually I share my food but naw those were mine and I am indulging. I thought it was appropriate but my mom got upset with me about not sharing which surprised me. I didn't feel bad but I've had reactions that are surprising when I don't want to share or I don't want people coming into my space. I don't know if my reaction is more then average of being territorial of anything deemed 'sacred' or 'my precious"
    What type is your mother? I'm curious.

    "I was fantasizing about those onion rings all week and I just saved up enough money to thoroughly enjoy them" is the most SEI quote I've seen in a while; thanks for the laugh

    Personally, I would not think 'stereotypically' that alpha's are territorial. I would kinda assume that Se types would be more territorial. I don't know enough Alpha's though to see a pattern. Though it is interesting that you say that SEI and ILE are more territorial from your perspective.
    Most ILEs I've known get really mad if anyone comes between them and their stuff. They seem to have a nesting mentality -- they have their space and the stuff inside it is theirs; they can really flare up to defend it. Though they don't seem to consciously think about their "stuff" so much as SEIs seem to, and generally display less care in treating it.

    I think everyone likes a space of their own; I meant that SEIs and ILEs seem to get more emotionally invested in it. ESEs stereotypically like to surround themselves with a pleasant environment and nice things, but they don't seem to really fear intrusion by the outside world. The outside world fears intrusion by ESEs. And I don't know enough LIIs to speak well for them, but as for me, I care that I have some space to retreat to and be alone for a while, but I don't particularly care that it's one I've made "mine." I also don't really tend to do much with it or feel much emotional investment with it -- my SEI ex got really bothered by how austere my living space was.

    I'll clarify on my reasoning. Generally, I am happy to share thoughts, ideas, and opinions. Just sometimes I know I can't freely share everything around specific company because I don't know what they will do with that information. Information is always a good thing and I would never actively hide this information from others when it can be beneficial or improvement. In a perfect world I would comfortably share. However, I had people use that information against me and didn't credit it so I am wary at this point. I also have people emotionally react to innocent perspective or thoughts that I was just giving out on a pure information base that I was not expecting. I just get wary in general from the emotional response I will get from sharing my own opinion, thoughts, and perspective on things. I'm protective of my items, wary of my owns ideas etc and I consider both sacred because I don't know how the outside world is going to respond to them. More so, I don't know if they were under attack, I am scared I would not able to defend and win.
    Out of curiosity, would you say that you feel attacked often?

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    They aren't really fleshed out, and the number of types they cover and is so large and often so different it makes them difficult to describe.
    Gotchya!



    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    What type is your mother? I'm curious.

    "I was fantasizing about those onion rings all week and I just saved up enough money to thoroughly enjoy them" is the most SEI quote I've seen in a while; thanks for the laugh
    I think she is a SLI. She has Te creative and Fe Polr for sure. She responds very similarly to most ST Delta's that I know. We have very different views in regards to people and psychological distance to say the least and this can cause some argument at times.

    Glad I could give you a laugh!

    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    Most ILEs I've known get really mad if anyone comes between them and their stuff. They seem to have a nesting mentality -- they have their space and the stuff inside it is theirs; they can really flare up to defend it. Though they don't seem to consciously think about their "stuff" so much as SEIs seem to, and generally display less care in treating it.
    This intrigues me! Albeit my ILE pool is 2, but I think they viewed me as strange for consciously looking for the lines of their nest.

    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    I think everyone likes a space of their own; I meant that SEIs and ILEs seem to get more emotionally investedin it. ESEs stereotypically like to surround themselves with a pleasant environment and nice things, but they don't seem to really fear intrusion by the outside world. The outside world fears intrusion by ESEs. And I don't know enough LIIs to speak well for them, but as for me, I care that I have some space to retreat to and be alone for a while, but I don't particularly care that it's one I've made "mine." I also don't really tend to do much with it or feel much emotional investment with it -- my SEI ex got really bothered by how austere my living space was.
    I think it really comes down to emotional investment. 100% that most people like a space of their own. I just tend to emotionally invest in any space they I get into. So I tend to be more sensitive to other people's space as I think I may intrude on their emotional space because that's how I feel. I know that not everyone is like that but I think everyone should feel safe and have a place they can feel okay investing emotionally in that people won't touch if they want that. I don't know many LII's but from what I have observed they are much more comfortable sharing things I would be more emotionally attached and protective of. Overall it seems that LII and ESE are less scared of intrusion then SEI and ILE. But that may be just a generalization and not the rule as there can be a lot of variety in the Alpha quadra. I would say it can vary more on subtype too.

    I will say though...the intrusion of an ESE is real fear though LOL. That gave me a good laugh. I have an ESE Aunt and had an ESE coworker. They are very sweet and I love them both. Just....I know I can't hide if they set their sights on me


    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    Out of curiosity, would you say that you feel attacked often?
    I feel very attacked.

    I would say I am more scared of being attacked while blindsided then actually being attacked. It's more the ambiguity that if I am not prepared I can loose my security and that means a lot to me. I think most people mean well and have good intentions. However, people are unpredictable at times and I am afraid I won't be able to mobile at times if this were to happen. I can mobilize when I need to but, on a daily basis I know I naturally can't move as quick and it is emotionally exhausting or painful. Like my onion rings. I share my food on a daily basis and I am happy to share. However, I did not expect my mom to fire back at me about not sharing my onion rings and lecturing me about it. I didn't expect it and now I have to plead my case about my freaking onion rings! I was not prepared, it took me by surprise and now I have to scramble, mobilize, and verbally defend. I feel the weakest when I am not prepared. Especially If I presume I don't have someone who will have my back and is able to defend me if I can't move fast enough.

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    Last edited by MissDucki; 05-30-2021 at 01:38 PM.

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    introverts are more sensitive to keep themselves distanced
    Se valued types are more controlling the space and property

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    SEI can be territorial. ESE less so. LII definitely not. ILE depends.

    I think there's different types of territorial-ity (that a word?). For SEI like you mentioned it's more like physical posessiveness. For ESE too but less prominent. For LII with their Se POLR they can't be territorial even if they want to, (with a few more rough LII being exceptions). And with ILE it's a mixed bag because of the Se role. Se role makes them technically bad at being territorial but good at pretending so they may display territorial behaviour similar to SLE.
    But you see there's a big difference between how SEI for instance and how SLE are territorial even if both are. For SLE it's more about physical control of the surroundings, manipulating physical potential of the objects around them (living beings and inanimate objects), meanwhile for SEI it's about one's personal space and one's personal belongings. For ILE then it's probably more similar to physical control rather than related to their personal space. I think my other ILE friends would agree.

    Anyways territoriality is probably more correlated with 1F in Psyche Yoga than any particular Socionics function/quadra. It's just that Socionics Sensing leads may be 1F more often than other types therefore giving the illusion that sensing leads are more territorial.

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    Ips tend to be the most territorial followed by Ejs. Now, Ijs like their private personal space and try to hide it from invaders but this need for isolation doesn't necessarily attach itself to specific territory. Eps seem to want access to everybody else's territory so I would think that they would be the least territorial because territory tends to require commitment which can tie one down.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Maybe it's about SP? Alphas with high SP.

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