The pain of being a SEI is as deep as the Mariana trench.
I don't enjoy cooking, I rarely bother to clean, I hate shopping for clothes, I don't like to draw, I don't like to garden, I can't paint, and I don't bother with makeup at all.
And yet I am a SEI.
I would give almost anything to not have to be a SEI, I would die a 1,000 times just to have a mere scrap more of intuition. Just to be able to paint text with a brush of vagueness, to be able to write such beautiful poetry with lots of symbolism and metaphors, to imbue it with a deeper meaning, to change one person's mind, I would give away my arms and legs, I would give away my sight for that.
I could stand here and chose a life of illusions and mirages and blind myself to reality, denying all who call me a sensor, and wearing a mask of chiffon. But I would achieve no higher position in life than that of a Jester. Or worse, to become a mime and shrink into the shadows, giving myself no higher purpose in life, wasting away my precious time with trivial matters and dying cold and alone with no higher purpose.
I must fight still against the bitter stinging wind that is life, fight against the barbed wire and roadblocks, fight all who oppose me with a fierce, unyielding steel soul. Use what little time I have on this Earth to give it something back, to make someone question and wonder, to give 110% out there.
Just a minute ago I wanted to die... I did not want to be this type... I wanted instead to drown myself in tears, choke, and drown, and sink to the bottom to sleep... But I realized the universal fact that life is bittersweet, it gives you sh*t and it gives you honey, and that eventually you will have one moment of pure joy one day, of pure bliss so sweet that you will laugh at the demon that insists you cannot achieve what you want from life, that you will stay stuck in your ways forever and never blossom. You will spit in its face and fly above the constraints that other people push on you.
You want to become the greatest poet of our day and age? Improve your logic? Do intellectual activities? Become intelligentsia? Start a mass rebellion? Block out every single one of the naysayers that says, "Oh but you aren't XXX type, you will never be the greatest at it", "you are SEI, you should only like sensory things", "You are a useless SEI", "I bet you only like baking cookies and sleeping like a cat ." Even though we SEIs do not like to argue we should! We should call them all out on their pigheadedness and destroy all these stereotypes about us! Then more people will start realizing they were SEIs all along, we will have a bigger online community, and can successfully dispel any myths that we are shallow and lazy and only care for sensory pleasures! We can band together and become a unstoppable force and start telling other SEIs that being a SEI doesn't disqualify you from success, that there is no need to despair because you were born a sensor, and that you do not have to live at the whims of an ILE.
We can be successful and independent, we can have hopes and dreams, and goals, and through hard work and perseverance we can achieve them, even if we have to suffer and strain towards them. Indeed, living life as a type that struggles to realize their dreams and is seen as lazy is like having weights on your legs and and walking up a steep hill with dense trees whilst bratty schoolboys shoot spit wads in your hair, hiding in the trees. But we must remember that the hill ends, at the end of the hill there is a saw, then the weights can be sawed off, the schoolboys will drop their straws when they see that you have reached the end of the hill, with hard work and steel will, macheting off every branch that hits you in the face, and succeeded in realizing your dreams when they could not themselves.
I give my love to all those who struggled with their typing and those who continue to struggle.
SEIs of this forum unite and stand strong against the roaring tide of sensor hate and discrimination!!!