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Thread: To all my lovely SEIs

  1. #41
    scattered moorings inumbra's Avatar
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    this is a socionics satire

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    Why? I am being 100% serious and definitely not joking or trolling, I am just a very weird SEI

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    Besides my lame reaction to me and my boyfriend breaking up is because we do it all the time...

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    I haven’t noticed much, if any, intuitive bias on this forum, and I haven’t seen anyone here talking about SEIs like you say you’ve seen in your OP. It looks to me like you’re comparing yourself to other people too much, instead of just being yourself. It’s easier said than done, but why not just try to focus on doing what you like, and try to ignore whatever you think strangers think about you?

    No one is perfect, and no one can do everything. If you don’t like to or can’t paint well, for instance, just focus on doing what you can do well. And if you don’t think you can do anything well, so what? The only person you have to prove anything to is yourself. There’s no need to do anything to justify your existence. If you’d just like to sit in the sun in all your free time, that’s just as valid a lifestyle as composing poetry or whatever. Just try to do whatever you’d like to do, and when you don’t feel like doing anything, don’t! There’s no need to feel guilty or inferior to anyone for living as you’d like to live.

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Oh boy never mind we broke up... I guess I refused physical things one too many times due to not being in the mood for it... Darn why do I always have to be dramatic and moody and spoil everything... Does anyone know if there are ILEs out there that can actually cook and clean for themselves sometimes and also not always changing their plans and not expect me to be affectionate 100% of the time? Or should I quit socionics and become a crazed maniac that lives by myself so that I don't feel the need to always question every single interaction between me and someone else in the terms of socionics? Because I don't feel like wasting time trying to find the perfect ILE out there... Better to just keep in mind what you want and let things happen naturally...
    That situation changed fast. Almost as fast as an EIE changes their opinions.

  6. #46
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    Ah no it wasn't on this forum but elsewhere and I wrote it in a particularly unhealthy state because I haven't been sleeping well and I have headaches and can't figure out why. I can end up saying dramatic things in such a state quite easily and it always sounds strange after I magically feel better. Such an inconvenience... And I am being myself in the way I write and everything and not trying to pretend, I am just being 100% with my feelings even if it sounds quite cringe and stupid to others because I feel like no one understands me very well, even my own self. And after some thought I realized that socionics doesn't help me in any way and makes things worse because now I feel the tendency to overanalyze every interaction and action I ever make. I have gained 0 useful insights on anything, and I realized that even if two people are of the same type they can have some major differences. For me it is important to justify my existence but I realized religion helps, otherwise it seems quite strange to exist and I always find myself going into the thought that nothing really matters and all of our actions are inconsequential. I do not feel guilty or inferior to anyone but myself because I simply do not care what most people say, except for those that are close to me. It has nothing to do with strangers as their actions and words do not affect me, I can only absorb some criticism but I don't think an internet forum is necessarily where I would get any real help. If I did nothing when I did not feel like doing anything I would become lazy and as a consequence end up getting nothing in life and then I know I would cry over it because I wish to make my dreams into reality and that takes hard work and perseverance. So I should only take advice as it pertains to me becoming a better person and growing into a healthy state of affairs. If my boyfriend and I get back together I have to convince him that socionics doesn't align with reality and that he should stop taking it so seriously.

  7. #47
    lkdhf qkb's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by inumbra View Post
    this is a socionics satire
    I lol'd at this thread too No offense midnight, ur funy and special and make me think of @Eli

    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Long distance relationship where we have never met in real life...
    ok

    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Oh boy never mind we broke up...
    ok, "broke up", sure

    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Otherwise he would let me do my writing and such stuff he just really really needs sensations. I think he's fed up with me talking about my goals and I am fed up with him over planning everything and changing his plans and that we simply must evolve out of talking about this and be more silly in our interactions and that I should be more caring...

    I guess I refused physical things one too many times due to not being in the mood for it... Darn why do I always have to be dramatic and moody and spoil everything... Does anyone know if there are ILEs out there that can actually cook and clean for themselves sometimes and also not always changing their plans and not expect me to be affectionate 100% of the time? Or should I quit socionics and become a crazed maniac that lives by myself so that I don't feel the need to always question every single interaction between me and someone else in the terms of socionics? Because I don't feel like wasting time trying to find the perfect ILE out there... Better to just keep in mind what you want and let things happen naturally...
    What you describe sounds more like EIE-LII semi-duality but yea, pls quit socionics, save yourself from self-mortification take care!
    I rarely feel alone. I rarely talk to anyone, yet in my head i have the most amazing, the most fantastic discussions with the people in my life. In real life, what most people talk about is several orders of magnitude lesser than their inner experiences. Most people never reveal the singularity of their subjective experience.
    Maybe I should learn to explore other people's consciousness. Maybe I should aim for a real space between me and others. Instead of cultivating monologues and fantasies. It's hard, but the alternative to this seems to be madness. ~ lkdhf qkb

    Life is soup. I'm fork


  8. #48
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    This sadly is how our relationship goes sometimes, fast changing... And now we are together... It must have something to do with stress and immaturity and not our types... I hate it so much and it is just socionics fault and mine for making it worse.

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    Nope my boyfriend is 100% ILE and I am a very weird SEI... Well maybe I will return to make posts that are actually supposed to be funny and maybe as I grow older I can sound more serious. No we really did break up because he called me in the middle of this... I am almost having a little too much fun with this but it's sadly serious come on...

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Nope my boyfriend is 100% ILE and I am a very weird SEI... Well maybe I will return to make posts that are actually supposed to be funny and maybe as I grow older I can sound more serious. No we really did break up because he called me in the middle of this... I am almost having a little too much fun with this but it's sadly serious come on...
    Looking forward to your return. You remind me of @Spider.

  11. #51
    I'm a jolly ESE man with a cake one's Avatar
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    Do ILEs even grow up
    R

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    ILEs do not care about such things as maturity as it doesn't help them in their goals at all. Seriousness is not something they need much of because to them life is about possibilities and enjoying it as it is away from harshness and brutality. To an ILE, at least the way I see it, they think gammas are too serious and self centered. Also they suck at Fi so they won't sound mature when they talk about their feelings or relationships at all and will misunderstand them often. They do not care about improving it though too much and they don't like all this talk of morals. Hierarchy, struggle, those things are not important either. Life is simply for enjoyment and pleasure. Life is too short to always be serious for them. And they have bad Si and need it greatly, so it can seem like they can't take care of themselves much, but for all they lack in Si they have a good mind for things that require Ne and Ti. Every type is different in their understanding of maturity, so mature for ILI is different from ILE is different from SEI. A 13 year old ILE is very different from 40 year old ILE in terms of their worldview.

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    Ксеркс, царь царей xerx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Hmm. Usually, the ILE needs a lot of mothering, which SEI Caregivers do naturally.

    SEI: "Oh, hi! It's nice to see you. What brilliant project are you working on now?"
    ILE: "Don't bother me, I just came in here to look for some string and a soldering iron."
    SEI: "The string is in the drawer, and I cleaned up your soldering things last night. They are in a drawer, under the cookie jar."
    ILE: "MMMMmmm Cookies." Takes a handful, grabs the soldering iron and string and leaves without saying goodbye.
    No breast milk with those cookies?

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    ILE wouldn't just take those cookies and leave true, he would also take the milk too... Also I have the feeling he wouldn't reject the opportunity to talk about his projects and then I imagine SEI giggles and then cut to the breast milk and cookies.

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    Quote Originally Posted by one View Post
    Do ILEs even grow up
    Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."

    -Carl Jung

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    Quote Originally Posted by chriscorey View Post
    As if any other Alpha is doing better in the mental maturity department.
    Sicuramente cercherai il significato di questo.

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    Looking into his gorgeous blue eyes... SlytherinPower's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    I just got tired of my boyfriend trying to push me to be a housewife and stereotyping me and so forth and I didn't want to pour all my feelings onto him because I know he would have just thought it was so stupid so it was better to put all my cringy feelings into the void.
    Have you tried telling him what you want your life to look like instead? Does he listen & respect that? Is he open minded? Is this his ideal in general?

    Side note cuz I relate. My IEE friend basically makes it sound like his dream of the future is him working hard at his manager job while his girl stays home with a couple kids, some pets, & cleans. I told him I'm not sure on wanting kids for various reasons & I'd definitely want to work cuz I get bored too easily being home. I also said I'm a good cook & fairly neat in general, but I don't really like or don't like to consistently cook & clean. He said if his girl wants to work or not is up to her & he wants to be able to provide for her either way. We had been friends for a year & knowing what I want for myself, he still asked me out.

    I'd say, just lay it out straight to him. Maybe compromise cuz if I ever lived with someone & they worked 60 hours but I worked 40, on my days off is when I'd probably surprise them & tidy things up or whatever it is that they'd appreciate & basically even out our work hours. Working days would be a different story though. Lol

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    Ok reading more of your replies, your bf seems to be killing your self esteem. I'd say try dating around some more. It's fine imo to have preferences, but he seems patronizing. & the fact that he knows socionics & brings it up in the ways he does to you, is different imo then people not into socionics where you might just have to clear up some misunderstandings with them. Typology seems like a tool he's using to make you into his little puppet almost. I say cut the strings. Lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Oh boy never mind we broke up... I guess I refused physical things one too many times due to not being in the mood for it... Darn why do I always have to be dramatic and moody and spoil everything... Does anyone know if there are ILEs out there that can actually cook and clean for themselves sometimes and also not always changing their plans and not expect me to be affectionate 100% of the time? Or should I quit socionics and become a crazed maniac that lives by myself so that I don't feel the need to always question every single interaction between me and someone else in the terms of socionics? Because I don't feel like wasting time trying to find the perfect ILE out there... Better to just keep in mind what you want and let things happen naturally...
    Date around without a certain type in mind. I don't really buy the dual idea. I'm also not settled on a type, so idk what my dual would even be.. lol Irregardless just look for people you find interesting or look for traits you want. Maybe look for a guy that loves to cook? Maybe seek a guy that dreams of being a chef? Or just talk to many different types of guys & see what sticks. Someone might surprise you. My grandparents are a supervision relationship & married 50+ yrs so.. not that I'd want their relationship, but I guess it works for them.

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    I'd say that socionics, unlike mbti, actually has a sensor bias. I think socionics people are easily impressed by Se egos.

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    Socionics points out flaws in the types unlike MBTI so there is more stereotyping and judging of others. Every type gets hate but I have noticed some get more than others. People don't usually talk about SEIs as the majority of people this forum aren't really alpha types. I think socionics people are impressed by SEI egos because there are a lot more Se valuers on this forum than Se devaluing types. So if there were more Deltas and Alphas on this forum that would look different.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SlytherinPower View Post
    Date around without a certain type in mind. I don't really buy the dual idea. I'm also not settled on a type, so idk what my dual would even be.. lol Irregardless just look for people you find interesting or look for traits you want. Maybe look for a guy that loves to cook? Maybe seek a guy that dreams of being a chef? Or just talk to many different types of guys & see what sticks. Someone might surprise you. My grandparents are a supervision relationship & married 50+ yrs so.. not that I'd want their relationship, but I guess it works for them.
    No I wouldn't want a guy that loves to cook or be a chef, I am a caretaker and not an infantile. Duality only works if all the other factors that have nothing to do with socionics align. Supervision doesn't sound very fun unless you are the supervisor, and even then you might end up hurting the person, but I guess the Benefactor/Benefit relations would be better, albeit not very great and quite possibly boring. I will stick with my boyfriend he isn't so bad after all, just might have to end up compromising a little.

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    Well that is inefficient, you must look at all functions and understand that there can't just be 14 neat little boxes to put people in, functions are on a spectrum. Not a limitation, but rather trying to assign expectations of people based on their type. Not every member of a certain type will fit the description and stereotypes 100%.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    No I wouldn't want a guy that loves to cook or be a chef, I am a caretaker and not an infantile. Duality only works if all the other factors that have nothing to do with socionics align. Supervision doesn't sound very fun unless you are the supervisor, and even then you might end up hurting the person, but I guess the Benefactor/Benefit relations would be better, albeit not very great and quite possibly boring. I will stick with my boyfriend he isn't so bad after all, just might have to end up compromising a little.
    It's also weird to me that everyone in this community seems to think food/cooking = Si. Someone try & tell me Guy Fieri for example is an SEI or SLI. Lol

    But anyway it was just an example.

    Socionics removed, what traits to you appreciate in other people?

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    No I wouldn't want a guy that loves to cook or be a chef, I am a caretaker and not an infantile. Duality only works if all the other factors that have nothing to do with socionics align. Supervision doesn't sound very fun unless you are the supervisor, and even then you might end up hurting the person, but I guess the Benefactor/Benefit relations would be better, albeit not very great and quite possibly boring. I will stick with my boyfriend he isn't so bad after all, just might have to end up compromising a little.
    imo he sounds like he bullies/puts you down. At least from what you wrote. & sounds like he gets angry when you don't fit his stereotype of the socionics type you are or he thinks that you are & just points out everything you're not doing for him. Personally, I'd tell him off but.. I can't tell someone to be in a relationship or not with someone. Maybe you're leaving out some good qualities about him? idk

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    Quote Originally Posted by SlytherinPower View Post
    It's also weird to me that everyone in this community seems to think food/cooking = Si. Someone try & tell me Guy Fieri for example is an SEI or SLI. Lol

    But anyway it was just an example.

    Socionics removed, what traits to you appreciate in other people?
    Being a Si user I usually use sensations to explain abstract concepts to myself to make it easier for me to understand. For example, take the abstract concept of spirituality. I have to conceptualize people as trees, and that our roots are our souls reaching for some kind of sense in this world, to let the tree stay firmly grounded, and if we have no sense or purpose we fall over and die. (Your sense or purpose can be to relax or to not care about sense or purpose btw.) For my roots, the Bible and God help me not to fall over and die. Sunlight is our ideals and our goals (my main goal is to get to heaven), we can't let obstacles block our light (obstacles in my case can be sins, other people, etc.), we must grow toward the light or stay small, spindly trees. A simpler example is when Forest Gump says, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are gonna get". I really don't know how else to explain how I use Si, maybe other users experience it differently, but I tend not to do traditional sensory activities besides going on runs and appreciating nature, listening to music. Well I admire people who are able to hold their own opinions, someone who can stay strong despite all the negativity and chaos of this world. I admire people with logic and sensibility because I am kind of incapable of complex logical thought due to being stronger with my emotions. I admire people with a sense of humor too because everyone knows laughter is the best medicine. I imagine hanging around artistically creative people as I am one myself, we can share our different interests in the arts, explore different creative worlds of the other person, but at the moment I have no one besides my boyfriend to speak to. I could write even more but I mainly summed it up. I like lots of different traits in people, depends on what place they have in my life, whether they are my teachers, my friends, my acquaintances, they should all have different qualities as the relationship fits.

    Edit: I forgot to mention that I don't like people who don't offer constructive criticism and just say "Well you suck", or people who are overly judgmental of the actions of others.
    Last edited by MidnightWilderness; 03-21-2021 at 10:10 PM.

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    C-ESI-Se sx/sp ashlesha's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlytherinPower View Post
    I'd say that socionics, unlike mbti, actually has a sensor bias. I think socionics people are easily impressed by Se egos.
    i'm not paying attention to this thread, but i wanna stress this. when i first arrived here, i self-typed EII and when i switched to ESI, it was a matter of whether or not i was strong enough to have Se. not a matter of whether or not i had too much Ne (unless it was like "look, you can't have Se, you're being so infantile right now" lol). being good enough to have Se was the perception barrier. was i GOOD enough to be ESI. you're right & you should say it

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    Quote Originally Posted by ashlesha View Post
    i'm not paying attention to this thread, but i wanna stress this. when i first arrived here, i self-typed EII and when i switched to ESI, it was a matter of whether or not i was strong enough to have Se. not a matter of whether or not i had too much Ne (unless it was like "look, you can't have Se, you're being so infantile right now" lol). being good enough to have Se was the perception barrier. was i GOOD enough to be ESI. you're right & you should say it
    100%

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    Yes because people can have different levels of abilities in their functions, it's mostly about preference of using them.

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    @SlytherinPower if you don't mind me asking, out of curiosity, what traits do you appreciate in other people?

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    @SlytherinPower if you don't mind me asking, out of curiosity, what traits do you appreciate in other people?
    Kindness, good with people, non-judgmental, not uptight, funny, sense of adventure, makes me feel like I don't have to worry what I say to them, & understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Being a Si user I usually use sensations to explain abstract concepts to myself to make it easier for me to understand. For example, take the abstract concept of spirituality. I have to conceptualize people as trees, and that our roots are our souls reaching for some kind of sense in this world, to let the tree stay firmly grounded, and if we have no sense or purpose we fall over and die. (Your sense or purpose can be to relax or to not care about sense or purpose btw.) For my roots, the Bible and God help me not to fall over and die. Sunlight is our ideals and our goals (my main goal is to get to heaven), we can't let obstacles block our light (obstacles in my case can be sins, other people, etc.), we must grow toward the light or stay small, spindly trees. A simpler example is when Forest Gump says, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are gonna get". I really don't know how else to explain how I use Si, maybe other users experience it differently, but I tend not to do traditional sensory activities besides going on runs and appreciating nature, listening to music. Well I admire people who are able to hold their own opinions, someone who can stay strong despite all the negativity and chaos of this world. I admire people with logic and sensibility because I am kind of incapable of complex logical thought due to being stronger with my emotions. I admire people with a sense of humor too because everyone knows laughter is the best medicine. I imagine hanging around artistically creative people as I am one myself, we can share our different interests in the arts, explore different creative worlds of the other person, but at the moment I have no one besides my boyfriend to speak to. I could write even more but I mainly summed it up. I like lots of different traits in people, depends on what place they have in my life, whether they are my teachers, my friends, my acquaintances, they should all have different qualities as the relationship fits.

    Edit: I forgot to mention that I don't like people who don't offer constructive criticism and just say "Well you suck", or people who are overly judgmental of the actions of others.
    Sense of purpose almost sounds like Ni. Just throwing it out there.

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    Well I do feel like I need a sense of purpose in life, otherwise I think about how it is meaningless to live and that no matter what you do, time will pass as usual and that we are all going to die and turn into other forms of matter. I get depressed when I feel my actions can't change anything and I feel useless. But I averted falling into such a pit and wallowing in self-pity by becoming a Christian and making goals for myself. My purpose is to get to heaven, help others on their way through the test of life as much as possible and entertain and heal through art. But sense of purpose is not grounds enough to say that I am a Ni user.

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    The best thing in life though is to make as many good memories as possible so you can look at old photos and cry bittersweet tears before succumbing to death.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Well I do feel like I need a sense of purpose in life, otherwise I think about how it is meaningless to live and that no matter what you do, time will pass as usual and that we are all going to die and turn into other forms of matter. I get depressed when I feel my actions can't change anything and I feel useless. But I averted falling into such a pit and wallowing in self-pity by becoming a Christian and making goals for myself. My purpose is to get to heaven, help others on their way through the test of life as much as possible and entertain and heal through art. But sense of purpose is not grounds enough to say that I am a Ni user.
    I often feel like I'm just knocking down days. It gets me depressed on & off. Especially when I feel that I'm in a rut.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    The best thing in life though is to make as many good memories as possible so you can look at old photos and cry bittersweet tears before succumbing to death.
    I'm not big on looking at old photos tbh but aww :')

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    Or just reflecting back on your life in general doesn't have to be old photos. I just imagine lying in my deathbed looking at photographs of my family and friends and crying, mulling over all my actions and feeling grateful for all the wonderful people in my life before I take one last gasp. But enough morbidity, I am still a teenager and I still hopefully have decades before I croak! If you feel stuck in a rut, try doing all the things that make you feel motivated, or rethink your goals, or maybe just do something different sometimes. But I don't know if that helps I'm not you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    Or just reflecting back on your life in general doesn't have to be old photos. I just imagine lying in my deathbed looking at photographs of my family and friends and crying, mulling over all my actions and feeling grateful for all the wonderful people in my life before I take one last gasp. But enough morbidity, I am still a teenager and I still hopefully have decades before I croak! If you feel stuck in a rut, try doing all the things that make you feel motivated, or rethink your goals, or maybe just do something different sometimes. But I don't know if that helps I'm not you.
    It does, thanks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MidnightWilderness View Post
    But also doesn't everyone find it mildly sad that they won't experience the world the same as another type out there and that those possibilities are forever closed off? I hope in heaven they give you the choice to change it just to see what it is like, or maybe we will reach a stage of all our cognitive functions being equal... And if it turns out that heaven doesn't exist then I guess there really isn't a meaning to life and that all of your actions are pointless and that in time we will all die anyways and that history will pass over us all and eventually our universe will stop expanding and collapse in on itself or maybe something else and that we are helpless to change the flow of time. If I could have a superpower to make time stop I would, so that I could experience most of everything before I die, so that I don't miss out on anything. It just bothers me to think that there are things I will never do and never know...
    SEI confirmed.



    For your mortality blues. (I still use it to self-flagellate from time to time):

    Sicuramente cercherai il significato di questo.

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    Oh I have already music for my mortality blues but I try not to focus on this too much as it will harm me. Best of all is just to be yourself, as I now just thought, no one can be like you. And try to make good use of your time and stop wallowing in self pity... If you do too much self-flagellation it will harm you and you will end up in a void of nothingness and emptiness. Just justify your actions in life with something already, develop a spirituality, and if you look back at all your mistakes you should say "Well it's bad that I made a mistake but at least I can learn from it and try not to do it again in the future". It's better to do self-reconstruction and see positives instead of negatives. At least I am not poor, at least I am not x, y, z. Better to stop thinking and start doing, then go back to thinking. If you can surround your self with positives and build a scaffold on which to live life, everything will be better.

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