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Thread: Obsession with love-making

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    Revelations's Avatar
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    Default Obsession with love-making

    Hi all, so you all barely know me and this is kind of a personal topic, but... let me get right to it. There's this girl that I'm absolutely obsessed with and no matter what I do, no matter which situation I imagine us to be in, in the end I imagine us having wild, hot, unimaginably crazy animal sex. In fact, we do it so often that I have no idea how we'd get any work done (we used to work together). Or anything else in life for that matter. I think she has the most attractive personality on earth; she basically can do no wrong. I would like to have children with her in the future, if possible.

    Problem is, she's married and with a beautiful baby boy. Other problem is, I'm FTM so I have no penis (sucks, I know. Imagine all the fun we could have!) I'm not upset about this and find the prospect of a relationship with her to satisfy my needs for now. But does anyone know if this is normal with duality? Might I have found my dual (or conflict, where I've heard the sex is just as good, if not better at times?) I would really like to know since going forward it would give me a great deal of insight surrounding our relationship. Thank you all for your time!

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    shotgunfingers's Avatar
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    There is no relationship, this isn't "normal". Move on.

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    @Revelations, you sound like you’re at a point similar to where I was about six years ago. I knew about duality and was bouncing around my life and ran into a stunningly beautiful and intelligent and strong and sensible ESI-Se e6 sp/sx female Dual who liked me. She was essentially perfect, except for one thing. She was eighteen and I was older than her father.
    Six years later, she’s still perfect but I’m still older than her father and she has decided that she prefers to sleep with women.
    Things in the real world don’t always work out the way they do in our imagination. Our imagination can help us to figure out what we might like and don’t like, but it has to be informed by reality.

    My recommendation is to figure out why you like this person and why sex plays such an important part in that attraction. This can help you work on becoming a more mature, healthy version of yourself and can help you make better informed decisions in the future.

    As for the woman married with children, there is a 0.044% chance that she might be interested in you in the very distant future. It is much more likely that you are going to find many more people who are not so perfect but are interested in you right now. So I’d say, move on, keep looking, and ask yourself some hard questions about who you want and why.

  4. #4

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    Obsession (attachment) in general is worth taking a look at regardless of its perceived normalcy if it makes you feel bad
    Last edited by Kalinoche buenanoche; 01-18-2021 at 06:47 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Revelations View Post
    Hi all, so you all barely know me and this is kind of a personal topic, but... let me get right to it. There's this girl that I'm absolutely obsessed with and no matter what I do, no matter which situation I imagine us to be in, in the end I imagine us having wild, hot, unimaginably crazy animal sex.
    Ahhhh....another sx/so struggling with our propensity for intensity. I been dere. I'm dere quite frequently, in fact.

    Okay, so what are you wanting? with da post? A lot of this is YOU. A lot of this is your developmental age (genes and body processes that increase your interest in getting it on and also genes that interest you in bonding with others), not just duality.



    Quote Originally Posted by Revelations View Post
    Or anything else in life for that matter. I think she has the most attractive personality on earth; she basically can do no wrong.
    FTR, as a gamma NT, I like when a gamma SF can see my challenges and where I could work on myself and develop and where my bullshit behavior is.

    Quote Originally Posted by Revelations View Post
    I would like to have children with her in the future, if possible.

    Problem is, she's married and with a beautiful baby boy.
    I'm happy for you you've found ONE OF THE MANY PEOPLE WITH WHOM you will experience such great chemistry that you're up for something big like a relationship or kids with them.

    This doesn't mean she's the only one you'll ever love and vice versa.

    Also, relationships generally have odds of working and not working. I don't wish her relationship to end, but your odds are not totally miniscule it will end, and that is sometimes healthy.


    Quote Originally Posted by Revelations View Post
    Other problem is, I'm FTM so I have no penis (sucks, I know. Imagine all the fun we could have!) I'm not upset about this and find the prospect of a relationship with her to satisfy my needs for now.
    Whatever sex equipment you have, I don't see it as disqualifying for sex or for kids. For the former, you have hands and other tools, and for the latter: You don't need to make the kid together to be parents together. There are over ten million kids ready to go.


    Quote Originally Posted by Revelations View Post
    But does anyone know if this is normal with duality? Might I have found my dual (or conflict, where I've heard the sex is just as good, if not better at times?) I would really like to know since going forward it would give me a great deal of insight surrounding our relationship. Thank you all for your time!

    I don't totally get it. Are you violating her marriage she's in by having a relationship now, or are you just dreaming about one and asking us about your chemistry?
    ENTj-Ni sx/so

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    Rebelondeck's Avatar
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    Committing to an already married woman is risky at best no matter how great the sex. If sex is all that you want from her then fine for you but one has to wonder what's in it for her. When the passion fades and it will, then it'll become apparent whether you are a dual or a conflict or some other partnership. The type of sexual attraction that you describe is animalistic and the animals have to go away for one to see clearly any long-term compatibility; one can be cognitively attracted to someone but it's usually far from wild crazy.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Um, did yall not see that they said they "IMAGINE" them having sex all the time.

    OP, are you just obsessed with this person with no reciprocation from them?

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