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Thread: Gulenko's typings of forum members AKA Big G SquaD

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    It would be great if I had energy/resources/time to do digital fakes out of myself by playing myself through different characters and sending them to mr godfather himself.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Consilience View Post
    That's the best way to look at it. Hypothetically, what will you do if you get something other than EII? Will you discard it if you disagree with it after some consideration?
    Do some research into whatever type/quadra he thinks I belong to, probably ask some close friends for their opinion (not using socionics speak, though), see if I misunderstood or missed something. I'm open to being wrong. Besides, whether I ultimately think he's right or not, I'm bound to learn a lot from the experience and his observations.

    Quote Originally Posted by Comatose Zaniac 007 View Post
    It would be great if I had energy/resources/time to do digital fakes out of myself by playing myself through different characters and sending them to mr godfather himself.
    lol get some groucho marx glasses for one of em.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kiana View Post
    She put down “EII by Gulenko” as a dumb joke. She’s never been typed by anyone. I’ve discussed this with several people who have been typed by G and Sb is EIE. It’s very common for people to self-type as their activator. She’s obsessed with her image and stirs up the emotional atmosphere to try to get people to fall on their sword. Fi is ignored as she trashes people who don’t serve/support her image, even friends. She values Se as she starts a lot of shit but shrinks back from any Se used on her as she can’t deal with direct confrontations. She uses the same tactics as EIE Cleopatra with image campaigns and getting other people to take out her “enemies.”
    Are you going to bark all day, little doggy?

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    Quote Originally Posted by megedy View Post
    This is a long thread I'm not caught up on yet (...there's so much squabbling in here lol), but finding out Gulenko does typing services is super fascinating. I've self-typed as EII for years now, I'm very curious to see what his opinion is & for the breakdown on his reasoning. Sent the email today.
    yay!

    it would be nice to see someone get something other than beta and gamma. *fingers crossed*
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    Gulenko's followers
    Anyone who has "followers" is basically a megalomaniac.

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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    yay!

    it would be nice to see someone get something other than beta and gamma. *fingers crossed*
    Haha I hope I break his streak too! Sent my first video and payment today. Anastasiia was really friendly, but she did warn me he's pretty busy so it might be a week or so until I get my batch of questions for my second video.

    Edit to mention, oof rewatching my own first video makes me cringe so damn hard lol. "ummm like uhh" & having difficulty finishing sentences at a decent point so just trailing off eggggh. i thought about writing prompts to add more structure because I knew it would be bad, but ultimately decided that it wouldn't be genuine and might skew my results. screw it i'd rather be cringey and get a more honest assessment lmao.
    Last edited by megedy; 01-01-2021 at 06:14 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    it would be nice to see someone get something other than beta and gamma. *fingers crossed*
    Some Gulenko's fans typed too many actors to EIE. And explained the difference of people of "same" type by... subtypes.
    There can be statistics anomaly in his typings, indeed.

    It's interesting that @Reyne, which started this thread, in not among local Big Gag SquaD.
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sol View Post
    Some Gulenko's fans typed too many actors to EIE. And explained the difference of people of "same" type by... subtypes.
    There can be statistics anomaly in his typings, indeed.

    It's interesting that @Reyne, which started this thread, in not among local Big Gag SquaD.
    yer a gag, Sol
    you have a lot of celeb typings for certain types too, and a few for some

    idk what happened to reyne. Seems he’s been quiet and not getting on as much. We crazy people must have scared him off.

    he’ll be back...they always come back
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    you have a lot of celeb typings for certain types too, and a few for some
    Types proportions in my list fit to borders which can be explained by actors region specifics.
    Except a single type - IEI. When I started to make actors list in ~2004 I had feelings to IEI girl and hence girls of this type were more interesting for me to be noticed. That girl was my main impression until 2017, public actors list I updated until 2015.

    While Gulenko's fans explained the situation from heretical theory view. Seem that EIE have very high predisposition to be actors to overdominate there, and may have much variety in the behavior IRL cause they play something there too. They explained by subtypes, by levels where a human has several types, etc heretical nonsense. Gulenko uses own theories besides Socionics what may lead to funny anomalies.

    Among examples. On socioforum exists Kuvaldos, a poor victim which read Gulenko's articles and that became too much for his mind. He types almost anyone to EIE in "what's my type section" there.

    > idk what happened to reyne. Seems he’s been quiet and not getting on as much. We crazy people must have scared him off.

    He saw darker corners of Socionics. I've noticed that @sbbds after talking here, ran away from the forum and still is hiding somewhere. This may be named as post-mistyping syndrome.

    > he’ll be back...they always come back

    but they never will be same
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sol View Post
    Except a single type - IEI. When I started to make actors list in ~2004 I had feelings to IEI girl and hence girls of this type were more interesting for me to be noticed. That girl was my main impression until 2017, public actors list I updated until 2015.
    I see that you type Agnetha Fltskog IEI. That feels very strange to me. I type her ESE.
    A true sense-perception certainly exists, but it always looks as though objects were not so much forcing their way into the subject in their own right as that the subject were seeing things quite differently, or saw quite other things than the rest of mankind. As a matter of fact, the subject perceives the same things as everybody else, only, he never stops at the purely objective effect, but concerns himself with the subjective perception released by the objective stimulus.
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    Also considering to get myself typed. Since I'm still not sure what my type is (I have been able to narrow it down to four possible variants, but that's it), I think it would be interesting experience, at least. I have been typed by few profilers who I believe are considered "recognized", so I'm very curious if there is a consistence in typing me on the field of Socionics. And I really hope there is some, because I definitelly didn't get that in MBTI system... (here is my typing video on Casual Cognition channel - starts at 01:45 minute - if anyone is interested in watching: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ofwu-xjUwM Discussion under the video is especially interesting because more than eight different types were suggested for me which seems like a huge diversity for one person...).
    Last edited by Sachmet; 01-02-2021 at 10:36 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sachmet View Post
    Also considering to get myself typed. Since I'm still not sure what my type is (I have been able to narrow it down to four possible variants, but that's it), I think it would be interesting experience, at least. I have been typed by few profilers who I believe are considered "recognized", so I'm very curious if there is a consistence in typing me on the field of Socionics. And I really hope there is some, because I definitelly didn't get that in MBTI system... (here is my typing video on Casual Cognition channel - starts at 01:45 minute - if anyone is interested in watching: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ofwu-xjUwM).
    I watched your video and think you are an INFx, leaning more towards IEI.

    edit: oh I just noticed that the whole video was about you, only watched your interview. yeah ISFP doesn't make sense.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dead account View Post
    I watched your video and think you are an INFx, leaning more towards IEI.
    Yes, this is still one of my strong candidates. Curious whether Gulenko will think the same...

    Quote Originally Posted by dead account View Post
    edit: oh I just noticed that the whole video was about you
    Hm, this makes me feel little bit narcissistic Anyway, thank you for watching and commenting!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sachmet View Post
    Yes, this is still one of my strong candidates. Curious whether Gulenko will think the same...

    Hm, this makes me feel little bit narcissistic Anyway, thank you for watching and commenting!
    np. I play with the idea of doing typing interviews myself in the future so I try to figure out what questions would work etc.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sachmet View Post
    Also considering to get myself typed. Since I'm still not sure what my type is (I have been able to narrow it down to four possible variants, but that's it), I think it would be interesting experience, at least. I have been typed by few profilers who I believe are considered "recognized", so I'm very curious if there is a consistence in typing me on the field of Socionics. And I really hope there is some, because I definitelly didn't get that in MBTI system... (here is my typing video on Casual Cognition channel - starts at 01:45 minute - if anyone is interested in watching: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ofwu-xjUwM Discussion under the video is especially interesting because more than eight different types were suggested for me which seems like a huge diversity for one person...).
    You seem it push Fe sidelines as less important while thinking that listening and advice is more important. Implying that a person needs to be heard and via that channel they can be helped to find a solution. This seems very judious and also Delta approach compared to gamma way of trusting their own feeling and pushing it through (coming from someone who has been recipient of forced altruism... that backfired in quite unfortunate ways although it was good because it came to a halt).
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reyne View Post
    The last bit of respect I had for Gulenko has just gone down the drain.
    I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that. --- Pippi Longstocking

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    something that some people have been saying has me wondering..that normalizing types don’t like reconsidering things they are used to?! Like if they grew up with model A, they wouldn’t take as well to model G... but I’m not like that about things

    I mean I see what people are talking about. Maybe I’m really harmonizing? Is it because I’m an ethical type? Am I rigid about things and don’t realize it?! Just a little confused by all this lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    something that some people have been saying has me wondering..that normalizing types don’t like reconsidering things they are used to?! Like if they grew up with model A, they wouldn’t take as well to model G... but I’m not like that about things

    I mean I see what people are talking about. Maybe I’m really harmonizing? Is it because I’m an ethical type? Am I rigid about things and don’t realize it?! Just a little confused by all this lol

    Ns are rigid in comparison with other subtypes. It doesnt mean that they necessarily identify as such. There is also variation as to how strong the subtype is. And DCNH is only covering a certain typical adaptation, not the whole personality.
    A true sense-perception certainly exists, but it always looks as though objects were not so much forcing their way into the subject in their own right as that the subject were seeing things quite differently, or saw quite other things than the rest of mankind. As a matter of fact, the subject perceives the same things as everybody else, only, he never stops at the purely objective effect, but concerns himself with the subjective perception released by the objective stimulus.
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    Harmonizing is very rigid when it comes to moving out of their own comfort zone. Creative is very rigid when it comes to settling, normalizing is very rigid when it comes to going their own way [translates as duty]. Dominant is very rigid to relax.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Comatose Zaniac 007 View Post
    Harmonizing is very rigid when it comes to moving out of their own comfort zone. Creative is very rigid when it comes to settling, normalizing is very rigid when it comes to going their own way [translates as duty]. Dominant is very rigid to relax.
    Ok, that makes a lot of sense when you say it like that

    thanks lol
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    Quote Originally Posted by Comatose Zaniac 007 View Post
    Harmonizing is very rigid when it comes to moving out of their own comfort zone. Creative is very rigid when it comes to settling, normalizing is very rigid when it comes to going their own way [translates as duty]. Dominant is very rigid to relax.
    Yes. Harmonizing dont like getting out of comfort zone due to Si, creative not wanting to settle due to Ne, normalizing is rigid due to Ti, and dominant steamrolls a lot due to Te.

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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    Ok, that makes a lot of sense when you say it like that

    thanks lol
    I’ve been wanting to ask you how you reconcile Ti and Fi in your type. You already have 4D Fi from demo and 2D Ti mob. Do you think that you’re really strong with interpersonal relations (even though you don’t value Fi)? And since you have Ti mob (valued), do you uphold boundaries more often and focus more on that function?

    Although I’m uncompromising, I’m not “my way or the highway” unlike how Ti blocked with Se egos are. My dad is LSI-N and he’s literally super hardcore rigid, “get out of my face or I’ll shoot you.” He never makes idle threats. I never make idle threats either, as I do mean what I say and follow through but I don’t threaten people and I find threats to be... distasteful and a buzzkill. It’s easy for me to spell out boundaries right away but I don’t care to dish out punishment. I’m willing to work with others to get compliance. My concern is for general rules to be upheld and applied equally given the same circumstances so equilibrium and functionality is maintained. I don’t need people to comply with my Ti rules, but my Fi principles are untouchable and cannot be broken. As a result, I want others to feel the same as my Fi if we are to hold common ground. If they use Fi wrong (and a lot of people do use it wrong), I’ll default to hating them and will treat them accordingly.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kiana View Post
    I’ve been wanting to ask you how you reconcile Ti and Fi in your type. You already have 4D Fi from demo and 2D Ti mob. Do you think that you’re really strong with interpersonal relations (even though you don’t value Fi)? And since you have Ti mob (valued), do you uphold boundaries more often and focus more on that function?

    Although I’m uncompromising, I’m not “my way or the highway” unlike how Ti blocked with Se egos are. My dad is LSI-N and he’s literally super hardcore rigid, “get out of my face or I’ll shoot you.” He never makes idle threats. I never make idle threats either, as I do mean what I say and follow through but I don’t threaten people and I find threats to be... distasteful and a buzzkill. It’s easy for me to spell out boundaries right away but I don’t care to dish out punishment. I’m willing to work with others to get compliance. My concern is for general rules to be upheld and applied equally given the same circumstances so equilibrium and functionality is maintained. I don’t need people to comply with my Ti rules, but my Fi principles are untouchable and cannot be broken. As a result, I want others to feel the same as my Fi if we are to hold common ground. If they use Fi wrong (and a lot of people do use it wrong), I’ll default to hating them and will treat them accordingly.
    Well I think normalizing is right. I am pretty ‘dutiful’ and loyal to those closest to me. Kind of traditional in my lifestyle. I get along with most people and am pretty reliable to those that I live with. But. I have to admit, if I don’t live with people I can be kind of flakey with everyone else. But I like being on time, like order- I really really try to be conscientious and responsible. It’s a life struggle. It’s my biggest struggle. Because I’m a disorganized slob who is very disturbed by it and very critical of myself. I don’t like people to know I’m messy. So it’s hard for me to admit this lol. I think Fi is pretty easy for me, my attitude towards things. Peoples attitude towards each other. As for right or wrong and good or bad, I can get a lot more philosophical. I value consistency in others and try to be consistent myself.


    As for boundaries...I know how much to talk to certain people to keep them close or at a distance to maintain where I want to be based on a lot of factors.
    If I feel like people are trying to get too close, or over stepping them, I’ll try to correct it by adjusting my interactions. But I don’t usually set up any boundaries or rules besides that, but I do get the feeling when I am letting people over step them too much and it’s going to cause a negative future implications. In those cases I try to explain why I think it’s a bad idea. But I do have a problem with blowing up if they push my button too many times (the right ones) and I just eventually flip out on them. I’m not so great at the consistency of maintain those boundaries always. Mood dependent.



    Anyway, I hope this is what you were asking. I’m admittedly not great at explaining these things...honestly think my Ti isn’t all that great

    Here is the IEI-Normalizing description.
    IEI-Normalizing Subtype



    Lyricist-Reconciler


    Prototype: A mediator between parties on the same team with conflicting interests


    Sensitive and attentive to people, she is able to maintain friendly relations. She can be relied upon. She exhibits a tolerant attitude to other people’s shortcomings and weaknesses. She finds it difficult to create or deal with conflict. In disputes, her focus is not on differences but rather on unifying points, aiming to reconcile. She hopes that her kindness and dedication will eventually be rewarded.


    She is fairly apprehensive and is prone to doubt and fluctuations when making important decisions; therefore, she’s in need of moral and physical support. She needs to be involved in matters with clear objectives in front of her. She completes assignments responsibly. She respects strong, influential people who confidently explain their position and give specific instructions. In work, she tends to lose a sense of reality, and is distracted by trifles she never has time to complete within a set period due to more important things.


    Owing to distractions, she sometimes forgets to fulfill promises, but is then eager to make amends. For the sake of maintaining relationships with family and fulfilling the requirement of her position, she tries to develop business skills and carry out family responsibilities. She is quite organized and thorough in everyday life.


    She will not impose her own feelings if they are not reciprocated; however, relationships that have run their course aren’t severed immediately, as she becomes accustomed to people. She is able to wait patiently, coaxing them to start all over again. She may endure severe hardships for the sake of her ideals or present feelings.



    • Psychological Types: Why Are People So Different?, Victor Gulenko, Ph.D.



    I think it’s pretty relatable...but I’m not all that organized or thorough even though I’d like to be lol. People can get that impression because I try to make myself seem that way. Like I have my crap together. That’s why I think I’m NH lol
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    Well I think normalizing is right. I am pretty dutiful and loyal to those closest to me. Kind of traditional in my lifestyle. I get along with most people and am pretty reliable to those that I live with. But. I have to admit, if I dont live with people I can be kind of flakey with everyone else. But I like being on time, like order- I really really try to be conscientious and responsible. Its a life struggle. Its my biggest struggle. Because Im a disorganized slob who is very disturbed by it and very critical of myself. I dont like people to know Im messy. So its hard for me to admit this lol. I think Fi is pretty easy for me, my attitude towards things. Peoples attitude towards each other. As for right or wrong and good or bad, I can get a lot more philosophical. I value consistency in others and try to be consistent myself.


    As for boundaries...I know how much to talk to certain people to keep them close or at a distance to maintain where I want to be based on a lot of factors.
    If I feel like people are trying to get too close, or over stepping them, Ill try to correct it by adjusting my interactions. But I dont usually set up any boundaries or rules besides that, but I do get the feeling when I am letting people over step them too much and its going to cause a negative future implications. In those cases I try to explain why I think its a bad idea. But I do have a problem with blowing up if they push my button too many times (the right ones) and I just eventually flip out on them. Im not so great at the consistency of maintain those boundaries always. Mood dependent.



    Anyway, I hope this is what you were asking. Im admittedly not great at explaining these things...honestly think my Ti isnt all that great

    Here is the IEI-Normalizing description.
    IEI-Normalizing Subtype



    Lyricist-Reconciler


    Prototype: A mediator between parties on the same team with conflicting interests


    Sensitive and attentive to people, she is able to maintain friendly relations. She can be relied upon. She exhibits a tolerant attitude to other peoples shortcomings and weaknesses. She finds it difficult to create or deal with conflict. In disputes, her focus is not on differences but rather on unifying points, aiming to reconcile. She hopes that her kindness and dedication will eventually be rewarded.


    She is fairly apprehensive and is prone to doubt and fluctuations when making important decisions; therefore, shes in need of moral and physical support. She needs to be involved in matters with clear objectives in front of her. She completes assignments responsibly. She respects strong, influential people who confidently explain their position and give specific instructions. In work, she tends to lose a sense of reality, and is distracted by trifles she never has time to complete within a set period due to more important things.


    Owing to distractions, she sometimes forgets to fulfill promises, but is then eager to make amends. For the sake of maintaining relationships with family and fulfilling the requirement of her position, she tries to develop business skills and carry out family responsibilities. She is quite organized and thorough in everyday life.


    She will not impose her own feelings if they are not reciprocated; however, relationships that have run their course arent severed immediately, as she becomes accustomed to people. She is able to wait patiently, coaxing them to start all over again. She may endure severe hardships for the sake of her ideals or present feelings.



    • Psychological Types: Why Are People So Different?, Victor Gulenko, Ph.D.



    I think its pretty relatable...but Im not all that organized or thorough even though Id like to be lol. People can get that impression because I try to make myself seem that way. Like I have my crap together. Thats why I think Im NH lol
    Yes, thank you! Youve responded as I thought you would for normalizing IEI! Youre also aristocratic, so I can see why you use Fi to be very specific with those you know to be clearly defined as being on your side which is a very Ti thing- clear boundaries to create order and well-defined structure. Higher levels of Fi would not immediately nor blatantly sever ties. Were both alike in that aspect due to the greater development of Fi over Ti. I like your description. Its really sturdy and sounds like you can hold your own. My description basically sounds like I should be an arms dealer Do you know what types your parents are?

    Thanks to my LSI-N dad for beating Ti in me so much that Ti PoLR is obscured and Ti dont bother me. Thinking about it, I realize why my dad drilled Ti in me, as he believed that in order to be strong, you uphold your boundaries, you cant trust others (hes super suspicious of everyone) and the best way is to avoid and not let people in to begin with (evidence of his preference for Ti over Fi). I believe Im a candyass and I admit that. My dad saw that early on and made sure to forge in me something that doesnt come naturally, and as a result I do deeply understand and have love for Ti since I actually equate Ti from an Fi standpoint that I was taught Ti out of love. Thanks to him, Ive learned early on to be aware enough to formulate an armor to protect Fi, so much so, it ends up looking like Ti.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kiana View Post
    Do you know what types your parents are?
    I’m not positive...Been thinking about it... I think my dad is SLI-N and my mom is IEE-D or C, although I might change my mind later. Mom seems like she could be EJ or EP.


    Some short info (but probably too long lol) about them & my childhood ->
     

    Dad is a business owner of a construction company. Doing what his father did. He did and still does most of the work himself, occasionally hiring people to help him (they usually get mad at him or fall out at some point lol).He isn’t very agreeable and most people have a hard time working with him long term, and they say he works them into the ground so he can make good money and they get screwed. But he is good at what he does, has the equipment, the business, the knowledge of it all, and people like to complain because he’s a bit of a Scrooge I guess lol. A tightwad. He’s a very reliable and dutiful hard worker. He’s worked himself into the ground and my mom spends all his money on frivolous things, he claims. I don’t want to get in the middle of it. Lol. And he lets her have control of his money. Or at least he used to. Mom suspects he’s been putting money back. I know nothing. lol. He wasn’t all that involved in my upbringing in the sense that he never disciplined me or felt he needed to. He was mainly a provider, a reliable constant, and played board games, and video games with me at night, in a friendly Fi bonding manner. Very quiet, mysterious guy. Pretty critical.


    Mom is a bit more complicated. She has some issues from growing up. She felt her mother didn’t buy her the things she needed/wanted, so she wanted us (her kids) to have the things she didn’t. So she spoiled my sister and I. She’s someone, if you ask if you can borrow 10$, she’ll give you 400$, and not expect you to pay her back, or probably won’t even let you pay her back (in contrast to my father who if you ask to borrow 10$, he will give you 10$. He won’t try to get you to pay him back, but will judge you eternally for not doing it lol). This is the environment I grew up in.


    Mom was the one mainly involved in my upbringing. We didn’t spend too much time at home. We spent a lot of time driving around, shopping, and eating at fine restaurants instead of meals at home. Mom didn’t like cooking. She also emphasized getting my sister and I involved. Whatever I was interested in, she’d get me lessons for it. Piano, ballet, dog showing, guitar. She was into aristocracy social stuff, too. Who is who, how ‘popular’ they are. Very aware of the fashion trends. Mom was all over the place, very adhd like...very positive, despite being hyper and neurotic. Major Pollyanna attitude. My mom definitely wears the pants in her marriage. She is much more agreeable than my dad, but she is built like a line backer and seems almost immune to my dads criticizing and can really hold her own against him.
    Also, dad always did the actual labor part of the business, but my mom handled all the bills/accounting (actually got a degree in accounting) for his business. She’s very clean and organized and even her housekeeper complains she too clean and doesn’t want to come as often (and mom was mad about it lol). She’s a bit of a germaphobe and has OCD issues about cleanliness, health, and safety. Which has in term also given me issues. I think it makes me neurotically focus on cleanliness and order, and I am ‘bad’ if I’m not and it makes me feel bad about myself. And since I’m naturally a slob, it’s definitely given me a complex. I’ve talked about it a lot with my therapist lol




    Anyway, that was the environment I grew up in. It didn’t prepare me much for the real world, tbh. And I’ve told my mom I wish she would have prepared me a bit better, because it was very unrealistic and when I got out on my own, it was a real wake up call, and I’ve had a hard time dealing. First world problems, and all that..lol and basically I get depressed if I’m broke, but I hate to admit it. But I’m also not good at working. Upbringing really emphasized materialism.
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    @aster, did you like being on your own?

    How did you spend your time?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    @aster, did you like being on your own?

    How did you spend your time?
    Well, I have one sister who is 10 years older than me. We lived in the middle of nowhere country in Indiana surrounded by cornfields. No one to play with. No internet back then. I had to entertain myself when I was home. So I played make believe by myself a lot, played with dolls, and barbies. Watched movies, played video games. I never really got bored. Like I said, mom really liked to run, and my sister was a singer, so we’d go to concerts for her a lot. Mom felt she ignored me for my older sister a lot, but I never felt that way or minded. I didn’t really care for attention while my sister has always liked it. I liked being by myself, but when my mom did work now and then (she would work for insurance since it was really expensive when you are self-employed) my great grandmother would watch me, who lived one house down. She’d watch my cousin, too, and he was more like a sibling to me than my sister. I liked having someone to play with, but we didn’t get along all that great. So yeah I didn’t mind being by myself, but it was nice to have people to play with. I think that being by myself a lot, in the country, didn’t help me develop as good social skills as someone that live in town surrounded by people their own age. I was much more focused on my internal world and occupying myself than social situations.

    When my EIE grandma retired from being a manager at GM, she’d run my cousin and I around everywhere. She didn’t like staying at home either, very much like my mom in that regard.
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    @aster, I should have asked you if you ever lived by yourself, without roommates or family, and how you felt about that.

    From what you just said, I'd imagine that living alone might seem nearly perfect to an introvert, and if that was the case, then why did you get married?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    @aster, I should have asked you if you ever lived by yourself, without roommates or family, and how you felt about that.

    From what you just said, I'd imagine that living alone might seem nearly perfect to an introvert, and if that was the case, then why did you get married?
    was wondering if thats what you meant lol actually, Adam, I think Id hate living on my own. Im an introvert and I dont think Im all that great at socializing, but I like being around people. I think Id get lonely. And I think itd make me nervous living by myself. I have very little faith in myself to survive on my own. It would be an interesting exercise, though. Like people that are scared of flying facing their fears by flying lol

    Id think Id lose my mind
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    As it is said Fi needs selective connection so I'd think that logical extroverts manage much better being without someone better than ethical introverts. Extrovert just won't settle easily without an introvert.
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    was wondering if thats what you meant lol actually, Adam, I think I’d hate living on my own. I’m an introvert and I don’t think I’m all that great at socializing, but I like being around people. I think I’d get lonely. And I think it’d make me nervous living by myself. I have very little faith in myself to survive on my own. It would be an interesting exercise, though. Like people that are scared of flying facing their fears by flying lol

    I’d think I’d lose my mind
    Thanks. Yes, that's the answer to my question.

    I asked because I was talking to an introverted woman on Match who said that she had never lived alone until her divorce, and she said it got lonely.

    I think my SLI ex married me because she was living alone and was lonely. I mean, basically, I think that was her reason, and she agreed to me because I was close in profile to her father. Also. at that time in my life, my life was basically a smoking crater and I was drunk most of the time and did crazy, impulsive things, so I probably looked like an IEE to her. I'm pretty sure she thought I needed someone to take care of me, because the first time she stood out from the crowd, it was by offering to give me a ride to the observatory, because I'd lost my driver's license and couldn't legally drive there myself.

    I've lived by myself for years and I don't mind it, as long as I can socialize at work. Having a live-in roommate would be really tough for me if that person weren't very compatible. I don't think I get lonely. I do think I get starved for human interaction. I don't think those two are the same thing. Instead of feeling lonely, I get bored.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 01-04-2021 at 03:19 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Thanks. Yes, that's the answer to my question.

    I asked because I was talking to an introverted woman on Match who said that she had never lived alone until her divorce, and she said it got lonely.

    I think my SLI ex married me because she was living alone and was lonely. I mean, basically, I think that was her reason, and she agreed to me because I was close in profile to her father. Also. at that time in my life, my life was basically a smoking crater and I was drunk most of the time, so I probably looked like an IEE to her.

    I've lived by myself for years and I don't mind it, as long as I can socialize at work. Having a live-in roommate would be really tough for me if that person weren't very compatible. I don't think I get lonely. I do think I get starved for human interaction. I don't think those two are the same thing.
    Yeah. I’ve never planned on living by myself or saw it was ideal. DH and I have been together since I was 16/ him 17. Things just happened and worked out that way, and when it became time to move on from our parents, we just assumed it would be together. So when we moved out, we moved in together. It makes me nervous thinking of kids growing up, moving out, DH dying and being by myself. I think I’d be truly depressed living on my own.
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    Yeah. I’ve never planned on living by myself or saw it was ideal. DH and I have been together since I was 16/ him 17. Things just happened and worked out that way, and when it became time to move on from our parents, we just assumed it would be together. So when we moved out, we moved in together. It makes me nervous thinking of kids growing up, moving out, DH dying and being by myself. I think I’d be truly depressed living on my own.
    Well, not to scare you, but my grandparents came to this country and met here. He was LIE and she was ESI, and I think they married at age 20 and 18, and he had a heart attack and died at age 54. She moved out of their big house because it was too much for her to keep up, into a much smaller place on a country subdivision street. She never remarried. She would sit in a chair that looked out the front window of her house, down the road, and she lived alone for another 32 years.
    The family tried to set her up with some random guy, but that was a complete failure. She rejected him without a thought.
    "Where will I find a man like my husband?", she said, kind of fatalistically.
    I don't think she was happy.


    I think my ESI grandmother was quite critical of most men. She didn't say much, but when she did let loose, she didn't hold back. I think that most men simply didn't impress her, and she even criticized my grandfather a lot, but he didn't seem to care. He just did what he wanted to do.
    My grandfather was an engineer at Westinghouse and had a lot of patents and, of course, he dressed in a suit to go to work. But he was also from a Czech farm family, so he had an acre of land behind his house that he planted with fruits, vegetables, and flowers. He even had a chicken coop. He'd come home from work, change clothes, and work in the garden until it got dark.
    The way I knew that my ESI grandmother was secretly critical of him was that she had two pictures of him side-by-side in her photo album. The first was him standing next to the house in a very sharply tailored suit, looking like a visionary business executive. The second was of him in a wife-beater T-shirt and dirty baggy pants, hair disheveled, watering the garden with a hose. They were simply labeled "Before" and "After". Lol.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 01-04-2021 at 03:47 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Well, not to scare you, but my grandparents came to this country and met here. He was LIE and she was ESI, and I think they married at age 20 and 18, and he had a heart attack and died at age 54. She moved out of their big house because it was too much for her to keep up, into a much smaller place on a country subdivision street. She never remarried. She would sit in a chair that looked out the front window of her house, down the road, and she lived alone for another 32 years.
    The family tried to set her up with some random guy, but that was a complete failure. She rejected him without a thought.
    "Where will I find a man like my husband?", she said, kind of fatalistically.
    I don't think she was happy.


    I think my ESI grandmother was quite critical of most men. She didn't say much, but when she did let loose, she didn't hold back. I think that most men simply didn't impress her, and she even criticized my grandfather a lot, but he didn't seem to care. He just did what he wanted to do.
    My grandfather was an engineer at Westinghouse and had a lot of patents and, of course, he dressed in a suit to go to work. But he was also from a Czech farm family, so he had an acre of land behind his house that he planted with fruits, vegetables, and flowers. He even had a chicken coop. He'd come home from work, change clothes, and work in the garden until it got dark.
    The way I knew that my ESI grandmother was secretly critical of him was that she had two pictures of him side-by-side in her photo album. The first was him standing next to the house in a very sharply tailored suit, looking like a visionary business executive. The second was of him in a wife-beater T-shirt and dirty baggy pants, hair disheveled, watering the garden with a hose. They were simply labeled "Before" and "After". Lol.
    lol yeah I’ve been thinking about it lately. DH is under the impression he isn’t going to live that long, probably to his 50’s because of family conditions. His father recently has a heart attack. I think he’s 58, too maybe. His father was the same age when he had a heart attack and died. His father got lucky by some miracle that he didn’t die. His heart had actually grown something to compensate for it. I forgot the details....


    But DH is hoping to make enough money to leave me with. I didn’t finish my degree and lately I’ve really been thinking I need to try online. Well I think about these things a lot but I never do them. lol See my mom would call them for me and take the steps to get me enrolled, otherwise I won’t do shit lol. I’ve seriously considered enlisting her help to get the ball rolling for me. DH is too busy and doesn’t understand why it’s so important to me. I really don’t want to get remarried. dating after 50 from what I’ve seen looks like hell since people seem to be carrying a lot of baggage and I don’t want to have to deal with it. Anyway. I’m sure it will be fine. I’m just here for the ride, riding the waves. I just try not to think about it too much, but enough to be prepared.
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    lol yeah I’ve been thinking about it lately. DH is under the impression he isn’t going to live that long, probably to his 50’s because of family conditions. His father recently has a heart attack. I think he’s 58, too maybe. His father was the same age when he had a heart attack and died. His father got lucky by some miracle that he didn’t die. His heart had actually grown something to compensate for it. I forgot the details....

    People are generally healthier now than they were thirty years ago, I think. The food my mother served the family was basically a heart attack on a plate.
    But surviving a heart attack is largely a matter of help reaching you within a few minutes. Longer than that, and other things start breaking, fast.


    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    But DH is hoping to make enough money to leave me with.

    Lol. That's my exact plan, too. My life insurance will only pay off the debts. The rest of the assets will have to be enough to yield a constant, living income.

    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    I didn’t finish my degree and lately I’ve really been thinking I need to try online. Well I think about these things a lot but I never do them. lol See my mom would call them for me and take the steps to get me enrolled, otherwise I won’t do shit lol. I’ve seriously considered enlisting her help to get the ball rolling for me. DH is too busy and doesn’t understand why it’s so important to me.

    I'd recommend getting help from anyone you can, ASAP. If you have to start when you don't have income, it's basically going to be impossible and you will have some very, very hard questions to deal with.


    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    I really don’t want to get remarried. dating after 50 from what I’ve seen looks like hell since people seem to be carrying a lot of baggage and I don’t want to have to deal with it. Anyway. I’m sure it will be fine. I’m just here for the ride, riding the waves. I just try not to think about it too much, but enough to be prepared.


    Yes, dating after 50 is hell. I can put myself in the mindset of someone who met their SO when they were 16 and when I do that, dating after 50 sounds like the equivalent of becoming a jet engine mechanic. It's hard to figure out and there aren't that many jet engines around, and if you make a mistake, the plane explodes.
    Not to say that it can't be done. Lol.

    But having a job you can do remotely, like business accounting services, might be a good idea.

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    it seems to me that normalising logical types, especially if they are men, are more obsessed about structural rules, and that you conform to them, so they have a heavier focus on Ti. this is especially visible for me in the company I work in, which is rather technical and full of normalising ST types. normalising ethical types, especially if they are women, seem to have a stronger accentuation on Fi, which leads to cautios, over-anxious behavior. they care more that you follow social rules.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post

    People are generally healthier now than they were thirty years ago, I think. The food my mother served the family was basically a heart attack on a plate.
    most people eat garbage all day. how many people do you see that mostly eat fruits and vegetables? and how many stuff their faces with processed meat and saturated fat? it's just that our living conditions improved.

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    I wouldn't want to work with technical projects as part of a team. Keep the margin right etc. The extra filling courses were like that in uni. You were supposed to practice information searching and it involved exacting questions. Bunch of BS I had to redo those tasks many times but I didn't have to do it ever in real courses.
    MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
    Winning is for losers

     

    Sincerely yours,
    idiosyncratic type
    Life is a joke but do you have a life?

  39. #639
    scientist donkey BrightDemonSheep96's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    I didn’t finish my degree and lately I’ve really been thinking I need to try online.
    Please tell me if you can fix your motivation because my sister is going to need that info.
    MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
    Winning is for losers

     

    Sincerely yours,
    idiosyncratic type
    Life is a joke but do you have a life?

  40. #640
    lkdhf qkb's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dead account View Post
    it seems to me that normalising logical types, especially if they are men, are more obsessed about structural rules, and that you conform to them, so they have a heavier focus on Ti. this is especially visible for me in the company I work in, which is rather technical and full of normalising ST types. normalising ethical types, especially if they are women, seem to have a stronger accentuation on Fi, which leads to cautios, over-anxious behavior. they care more that you follow social rules.
    I'm probably between creative and normalizing on the DCNH spectrum, but what always baffled me was how sensitive strong normalizers are to everything and everyone who steps out of the line. And then they get super angry about nothing and do this kind of weird passive-agressive shit:



    I'm thinking like, wtf? Who has time for petty finger-wagging like that? I get it, it's annoying when others don't respect the rules, but just be normal and learn to care less, because this person obviously doesn't give a f*** about what others think anyway
    I rarely feel alone. I rarely talk to anyone, yet in my head i have the most amazing, the most fantastic discussions with the people in my life. In real life, what most people talk about is several orders of magnitude lesser than their inner experiences. Most people never reveal the singularity of their subjective experience.
    Maybe I should learn to explore other people's consciousness. Maybe I should aim for a real space between me and others. Instead of cultivating monologues and fantasies. It's hard, but the alternative to this seems to be madness. ~ lkdhf qkb

    Life is soup. I'm fork


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