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Thread: Sad Duality Scenarios

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    Default Sad Duality Scenarios

    Hatsumomo was ENTJ in Geisha (Gong Li played her). I don't think Hannibal was ESI necessarily. But the actor Gaspard Ulliel is ESI-Se. I'm thinking this is a good example of unhealthy duality

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    There are no health/unhealthy "scenarios" of IR. There are other factors besides IR which influence on relations.
    There is many what can be against relations to be good. Concrete duals may have anything from that.

    In IR related specifics deserves to mention one thing.
    The attitude and behavior against friendship - when people see no interest for such relations or do not enough efforts for them - is the common obstacle for good IR factor be stronger. The main advantage of good IR is friendship abbility - to share one life in whole together - to be sincere, open and care about interests of each other, to join minds with other human and perceive what he thinks and feels as a part of you too. It's not common for today very individualistic culture to have friendship relations. People make pairs and bring there this individualistic attitude which does not allow them to be closer as persons and so good IR give them lesser. The problem can be tried to be reduced by consciousness and unconsciousness influencing methods - to remove interpersonal borders between people and to establish the attitude on unconditional acceptance. This would allow good IR to give the more. While the same with bad IR may lead to problems, as a personality accepted too alien components may increase inner conflict and neurotic symptoms. In case duality influence would balanced the type closer to equality of functions then bad IR people with their "alien" values may be accepted easier and this integration of people alike conflictors mb useful as all 8 functions are important in equal degree.

    Examples of badly went pairs with good IR may be in a quantity. You'll find there a lot of general mistakes and problems people have in different relations. When the weight of this appears higher than what good IR and other good gives then relations become not good. In marriages duality mb allows to reduce divorces twice from 50% common for today to 25%. There is good chance to help people to use advantages of duality effects so they'd were more satisfied there - to help them find such pairs and to help them to get "joined minds" state. Though, it's experimental and hypothetical still. Even duality/complementary functions effect is not objectively proved still, to have a basis to study people to use it.

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    jimi$dope one's Avatar
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    Sad duality scenario: they never met

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    f.k.a Oprah sbbds's Avatar
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    Idk about sad but I met and had an awkward date with a dual last night. I wouldn’t say he was a bad person but maybe a bit underdeveloped, or maybe he let himself drink too much and lost control over himself? Idk...

    Similar ish scenario with another dual I met last week. Both of these IEIs I ended up blocking so I wouldn’t have to deal with the relational fallout lolol. I suppose these situations were sad and unfortunate, although I don’t regret getting the experience. The “Block” button is an Fi Polr’s best friend.

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    Spiritual Advisor Hope's Avatar
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    @sbbds I know 2 male IEI (one's my friend the other one is the brother of an LII gf) who ended up with Se women (one xSI, the other one SLE). What these 2 guys had in common is that they have Se parents (SLE das for the one who was with the SLE woman and ESI for the one with the xSI). Unfortunately the SLE woman cheated on the brother of my friend and left him and their son, but my friend still with his gf and they have one kid. I think the IEIs who are more likely to dualize have had at least 1 Se parent. Mb trying with onr dating IEI with Se parents would give you more chance to click.

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    f.k.a Oprah sbbds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
    @sbbds I know 2 male IEI (one's my friend the other one is the brother of an LII gf) who ended up with Se women (one xSI, the other one SLE). What these 2 guys had in common is that they have Se parents (SLE das for the one who was with the SLE woman and ESI for the one with the xSI). Unfortunately the SLE woman cheated on the brother of my friend and left him and their son, but my friend still with his gf and they have one kid. I think the IEIs who are more likely to dualize have had at least 1 Se parent. Mb trying with onr dating IEI with Se parents would give you more chance to click.
    Thanks Tommy. I wish I could know the types of these IEI guys’ parents before talking with them. If I’ve gotten to know them enough to know the types of their parents too, then we probably do click anyway.... I think? I’ll keep an eye out for this though.

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    Spiritual Advisor Hope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sbbds View Post
    Thanks Tommy. I wish I could know the types of these IEI guys’ parents before talking with them. If I’ve gotten to know them enough to know the types of their parents too, then we probably do click anyway.... I think? I’ll keep an eye out for this though.
    Yeah, if the context permits it and if during the chat doesnt seems to awkward, mb you could ask about their relationships with their parents, how they perceived them or describe them, their childhood etc.
    Last edited by Hope; 10-26-2020 at 12:59 AM.

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