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Thread: Is this Se seeking or also Ne seeking?

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    Default Is this Se seeking or also Ne seeking?

    "Someone who encourages and motivates you to succeed and accomplish your goals and aspirations; someone who stimulates you to action." <== major problem of mine. I often lack the motivation or simply lack meaning in life, no idea what "road" to go down on or wtf to do. If I go outside to do stuff I get bored and demotivated. Kinda lost.

    "Someone who helps make you comfortable and can provide positive sensory stimuli for you such as good food or comfortable surroundings." <== I think I can effortlessly do this myself / has never been a problem. I'm messy and disorganized tho. Never in my life did I ever doubt my ability to produce delicious food, not even the first time I was tall enough to use the stove. Making food always relaxes me. creating a comfy environment isn't really a problem either.

    Examples:

    Chiken wings.. >) who needs a SEI, not me.



    Mushrooms with onion and cheese, potatoes, leavened cucumber (idk how to translate this)



    Mici (3 types of meat, seasoning an other stuff, kind of a Romanian secret recipe >) )


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    What you describing needing sounds like honestly.

    The quote in bold is talking about lacking drive and needing to be pushed in the direction of your goals. You respond by speaking of lacking motivation, then the sentence turns into "or rather..." the rest sounds more like not knowing what path to take which sounds more like lacking in .

    I'm not drawing conclusions about your type, just going by what you said, which is probably not conclusive of anything since the information does not a give a holistic view of your psyche (and I'm not saying you should, either).


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    I still think you are ILE. ILE have ignoring. You mentioned me but I don’t see the mention anymore. I’m just gonna paste what was said in shoutbox again, which is my opinion, realistically speaking based on life experience:

    [Today 01:20 AM] sbbds
    : “"Someone who encourages and motivates you to succeed and accomplish your goals and aspirations; someone who stimulates you to action." <= I think this is all duals technically. Not just Se seekers.

    [Today 01:20 AM] sbbds
    : “"Someone who helps make you comfortable and can provide positive sensory stimuli for you such as good food or comfortable surroundings." <== idk I think i can effortlessly do this myself.”. This is all adults

    I’ve dated an ILE for two years now and they are self-depreciating lazy fucks with no motivation most of the time, as are many other men of various other types at times.

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    Because your dual is supposed to have the same values and therefore the same goals as you, which should therefore motivate you to action towards accomplishing said goals together...... everybody needs that, not just Se people. DUH!

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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    "Someone who encourages and motivates you to succeed and accomplish your goals and aspirations; someone who stimulates you to action." <== major problem of mine. I often lack the motivation or simply lack meaning in life, no idea what "road" to go down on or wtf to do. If I go outside to do stuff I get bored and demotivated. Kinda lost.
    This sentence screams Se-seeking to me. Ne as I see it is more an idea generator, it does not care as much about taking actions.

    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    "Someone who helps make you comfortable and can provide positive sensory stimuli for you such as good food or comfortable surroundings." <== I think I can effortlessly do this myself / has never been a problem. I'm messy and disorganized tho. Never in my life did I ever doubt my ability to produce delicious food, not even the first time I was tall enough to use the stove. Making food always relaxes me. creating a comfy environment isn't really a problem either.
    I suppose you are considering SLI for yourself?

    I read the following about ILI, called the Critic on aimtoknow:
    "Critics are prudent in matters of comfort and health. These types will reject any emergency situations and pure enthusiasm without any factual accuracy. In everyday life Critics surround themselves with plenty of familiar things. Often these types are gourmet. Critics follow the rules of occupational health and try to keep everything clean."

    I have always been surprised about this description that would describe Si-lead better (or at least Si-valuing types), but maybe I shouldn't.
    Last edited by Xima; 07-23-2020 at 10:48 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Xima View Post
    This sentence screams Se-seeking to me. Ne as I see it is more an idea generator, it does not care as much about taking actions.



    I suppose you are considering SLI for yourself?

    I read the following about ILI, called the Critic on aimtoknow:
    "Critics are prudent in matters of comfort and health. These types will reject any emergency situations and pure enthusiasm without any factual accuracy. In everyday life Critics surround themselves with plenty of familiar things. Often these types are gourmet. Critics follow the rules of occupational health and try to keep everything clean."

    I have always been surprised about this description that would describe Si-lead better (or at least Si-valuing types), but maybe I shouldn't.
    Idk what my type is beyond 100% certain of being irrational base, just considering things to see what sticks.

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    It is ILI's role. Creative subs might ignore it in their own ways. I mean role should at least fulfill some meaning in life.
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    To understand your values is best to use IR effects. I had a similar problem to choose between LSE/LSI for my type and helped IR with people in the life.

    "Someone who encourages and motivates you to succeed and accomplish your goals and aspirations; someone who stimulates you to action." <== major problem of mine. I often lack the motivation or simply lack meaning in life, no idea what "road" to go down on or wtf to do. If I go outside to do stuff I get bored and demotivated. Kinda lost.

    This seems as general. Types specific is _what_ stimulates you, - your weak valued functions. When you feel a support in weak regions you become more assured and so more motivated to act. Also your consciousness gets better contact with the contents and energy of your unconsciousness - you are feeling better self-acceptance, more of energy, get more pleasure and interest in what you do.

    valued Se - an attraction to expensive things, money, property, power
    valued Si - an attraction to sensory pleasures and physical comfort

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    Quote Originally Posted by COVID 007 View Post
    It is ILI's role. Creative subs might ignore it in their own ways. I mean role should at least fulfill some meaning in life.
    Yup. It's a bear minimum to fulfill the role function.

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    Quote Originally Posted by inumbra View Post
    Yup. It's a bear minimum to fulfill the role function.
    idk.. all I know is that I'm good with interior design, aesthetics, making food and comfy surroundings... BUT I'm a disaster when it comes to remembering to drink water, sometimes I forget to eat or sleep, may wreck my back sitting in a weird uncomfy position because I found something interesting to do/dig into. I may stay up till the crack of dawn and only notice when the birds outside start chirping. I'm disorganized and chaotic both inside my mind and externally in the physical world as well. Very I'll see when I get there kind of improvisational problem solving for absolutely everything, planning rarely happens and when it does its very basic "set goal X". Its how I cook food as well. I don't really need recipes, I just cook lol, come up with something on the fly or modify existing recipe to "spice it up". *shrug* never felt uneasy doing this and I have thousands of hours experience, so ppl think I'm a good chef.

    Hmm.. duno, looks like I'm really ENTP under MBTI tho.

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    the function of Ne is similar to Se. Both are there to help other people do the right thing. Ne encourages Si types to leave their safe spaces by means of 'tasty carrots', whereas Se does the same thing to Ni types by means of a 'kick in the butt'.

    Vice versa it also works like that. Si types dampen the hyperactivity of Ne types (so that things actually get done and finished), whereas Ni types provide sense to the actions of Se types (so things are done for a purpose, other than for the sake of mere power).

    Perhaps take this article and try to translate was is said about IEEs to ILEs:

    https://mavericksocionics.blogspot.c...stive-and.html

    In a nutshell: the goal of a less effective functioning ILE is in their Mobilizing function, which is Fe. ILEs want to be part of groups of people in which they feel well. Without the help of an SEI, ILEs will try to make it happen by acting out their Mobilizing-Fe, which typically makes them clownish, but it is also a problem, because using Mobilizing Fe violates the principles related to Fi, which is their PoLR for exactly that reason. SEIs provide ILEs with Si, fulfilling the most essential ILE need, which changes the demands on their Fe-mobilizing to a level that the ILE is capable of handling better and more effective, not in the least because the SEI attributes the social environment in which an ILE can thrive. In return, the ILE will take the SEI to all sort of interesting art-house movies, movies that the SEI was not aware of exists, but are quite interesting nonetheless, evoking a level of intellectualism in the SEI that on their own never comes out.
    Last edited by consentingadult; 07-24-2020 at 09:07 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    "Someone who encourages and motivates you to succeed and accomplish your goals and aspirations; someone who stimulates you to action." <== major problem of mine. I often lack the motivation or simply lack meaning in life, no idea what "road" to go down on or wtf to do. If I go outside to do stuff I get bored and demotivated. Kinda lost.

    "Someone who helps make you comfortable and can provide positive sensory stimuli for you such as good food or comfortable surroundings." <== I think I can effortlessly do this myself / has never been a problem. I'm messy and disorganized tho. Never in my life did I ever doubt my ability to produce delicious food, not even the first time I was tall enough to use the stove. Making food always relaxes me. creating a comfy environment isn't really a problem either.

    Examples:

    Chiken wings.. >) who needs a SEI, not me.



    Mushrooms with onion and cheese, potatoes, leavened cucumber (idk how to translate this)



    Mici (3 types of meat, seasoning an other stuff, kind of a Romanian secret recipe >) )


    if u lack meaning and are lost and are feeling like its an issue/ would like help in that direction its probable that u are Se ego

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    Quote Originally Posted by Number 9 large View Post
    if u lack meaning and are lost and are feeling like its an issue/ would like help in that direction its probable that u are Se ego
    Thats why I'm trying to figure out my type, anything that would allow me to point myself in a direction to get an idea, so my efforts aren't wasted. I'm looking for meaning, a road to go down on, a far off goal, something I'm made for so to say.

    I'm not really interested in too many options, having too many options is annoying.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    Thats why I'm trying to figure out my type, anything that would allow me to point myself in a direction to get an idea, so my efforts aren't wasted. I'm looking for meaning, a road to go down on, a far off goal, something I'm made for so to say.
    yeah well u can probably start by looking at Se ego types

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    Lack of motivation, meaning or direction in life has nothing to do with type although type can perhaps be used to predict one's behaviour when one is lacking.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    I feel real se egos don't really give you much of a choice lol. For example (I told this story before but whatever) at Toys R Us once, I mean back before they shut down- there was this obvious SLE woman who kept following me around the store. I tried avoiding her like seven times because I'm shy and don't really like talking to people in public. But she insisted , she socially raped me (and in the end, I'm glad she did- you shouldn't be weak and give up on me just because I'm aloof but I mean, you don't have to perform for me either...) Anyway, she started talking to me about something I was buying (I forgot what it was now lol) and she was like 'yes that's a good one I got that for my own kids' or something and I just nodded shyly and said 'oh that's cool.'

    I compare that to idk Esther Hicks who tries to be inspirational and sell books but she has a much more 'take it or leave it' approach. Whereas a Se ego basically fists you with the 'inspiration' until you have no choice but to feel... something. I mean this doesn't mean I am going to like every SLE of course... I've had SLEs in my life who were way too pushy/abrasive and it doesn't work. Though pushiness/abrasiveness is usually a ESE/LSE/LIE thing to me.

    Ne inspiration can also be very pushy/direct like that (even borderline physical at times) but I also feel like it gives you more options. Because that is what Ne is essentially, at its core, options. 'What if'...like an ILE male playing make believe. Se is more like... I'm not saying Se is rape-y per se lol, but it's external STATICs of objects so there's just less RNG involved at its core. I think if you want to mentally sort out Ne from Se maybe that is the best way to go about it, generally?

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    I just feel like the fact that you put huge plates of chicken wings in your OP for this kind of topic too screams Si-Ne and Ne leading to me @shotgunfingers

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    Types without meaning:
    Ne ego's become Don Quixotes - fighting for their non existing ideal
    Ni egos surrender to an awful state
    Se egos rampantly go for new conquests
    Si egos just tune to their comfort experiences day after day
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    And when depressed, many turn to their dual seeking function and try to provide it themselves in a futile way. For example, Ne leads might lie in bed or bubble bath watching feel-good TV, eating chocolate, Ni leads drink themselves to a ditch recklessly, Se lead becomes uncharacteristically introspected and desperately tries to find meaning life that feels pointless and going nowhere, indulging in fantasy worlds and daydreaming.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Northstar View Post
    And when depressed, many turn to their dual seeking function and try to provide it themselves in a futile way. For example, Ne leads might lie in bed or bubble bath watching feel-good TV, eating chocolate, Ni leads drink themselves to a ditch recklessly, Se lead becomes uncharacteristically introspected and desperately tries to find meaning life that feels pointless and going nowhere, indulging in fantasy worlds and daydreaming.
    Literally whats happening. Kinda been stuck in a rut with no clear idea where to focus my efforts, but its clear to me I can't go on like this.. there is nothing else to do really but to work my way out of it, physical training, sleep, water, daylight, find a woman & learn a new skill-set that compliments what I already know. Idk if I'll ever figure out wtf I'm meant to do.. but its probably never going to happen in INTP mode. It should work for a short term goal. I'll probably have a clearer idea of things once I'm up and running again.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Northstar View Post
    And when depressed, many turn to their dual seeking function and try to provide it themselves in a futile way. For example, Ne leads might lie in bed or bubble bath watching feel-good TV, eating chocolate, Ni leads drink themselves to a ditch recklessly, Se lead becomes uncharacteristically introspected and desperately tries to find meaning life that feels pointless and going nowhere, indulging in fantasy worlds and daydreaming.
    And that rest makes me very lethargic. It is like I am at my best doing (semi)random less defined stuff. The rest is the thing I can do without visibly disturbing others while being internally twisted on the edge but I can still be very unmanageable with routine procedures. I can not safely do Si.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Northstar View Post
    And when depressed, many turn to their dual seeking function and try to provide it themselves in a futile way. For example, Ne leads might lie in bed or bubble bath watching feel-good TV, eating chocolate, Ni leads drink themselves to a ditch recklessly, Se lead becomes uncharacteristically introspected and desperately tries to find meaning life that feels pointless and going nowhere, indulging in fantasy worlds and daydreaming.
    EXCUSE ME?! My bubble bath was my best investment ever!
    “I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking

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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    Literally whats happening. Kinda been stuck in a rut with no clear idea where to focus my efforts, but its clear to me I can't go on like this.. there is nothing else to do really but to work my way out of it, physical training, sleep, water, daylight, find a woman & learn a new skill-set that compliments what I already know. Idk if I'll ever figure out wtf I'm meant to do.. but its probably never going to happen in INTP mode. It should work for a short term goal. I'll probably have a clearer idea of things once I'm up and running again.
    One of the most important words in Northstar's post is the word 'uncharacteristically'. If he hadn't put that word into it, it would have made me an Se lead too. Drop the word 'uncharacteristically', and you end up with a sub-sentence that easily also applies to Ne-leads.
    “I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking

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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    One of the most important words in Northstar's post is the word 'uncharacteristically'. If he hadn't put that word into it, it would have made me an Se lead too. Drop the word 'uncharacteristically', and you end up with a sub-sentence that easily also applies to Ne-leads.
    At this point not sure. What I know of myself: choleric-melancholic type 6w5 with counter-phobic leanings. Possibly NT, Oldham's vigilant type (paranoid tendencies).
    Working on the rest, this thread is part of the self discovery process.

    I doubt me being Ne lead type, because I don't like having many options, I always strive to limit my options to one optimal one, to achieve closure and accuracy. If I have Ne-Ti, I don't use it like ILEs, to create things and prototype, but to look at existing systems and discern the flaws to rip ideas apart, shoot them down one by one till I arrive at a workable one that shows promise. I'm irrational base for sure tho.

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    Just wanted to randomly say those chicken wings look fantastic.

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    The quote seems more like you know what you want to/should do, but you just can't make yourself do it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ouronis View Post
    The quote seems more like you know what you want to/should do, but you just can't make yourself do it.
    Already doing it tbh. The problem is having no real meaningful end goal. It may be just my cynical and nihilistic outlook. "Survive, but what for? Why am I doing what I'm doing?" Some days idk why I even get out of bed for..
    Last edited by SGF; 07-27-2020 at 04:24 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sbbds View Post
    I’ve dated an ILE for two years now and they are self-depreciating lazy fucks with no motivation most of the time, as are many other men of various other types at times.
    Sweet sweet confirmation. I considered to retype myself to some Ip temperament, because I am incredibly lazy and inactive.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Reyne View Post
    The first quote, no. I'm the living proof. I consider the kind of extrovert that tries to push you into action annoying. Plenty of other Si valuers may feel the same. Some people fare well with outside motivation, others have to find the motivation inside, and feeling that kind of pressure will only annoy them.
    This is probably more individual than about type values then. I actually feel annoyed by it to some extent too now that you mention it. My point more though was that the existence of a dual would motivate you to do things you value without using pressure necessarily.

    What sorts of things do you feel motivated to do?

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    Idk, I have noted my duals (SLI) at times have the greatest lack of ambition even if they're often greatly skilled and amazing people. My best friend could do a lot with that skill, but no she won't, instead she wastes time with toxic ass girlfriends who castrate her. Meanwhile, I, a Ne lead, learn fast all the skills I need for my goals and apply them and get shit done coz I set myself into motion without much help, I just find it easy to get some motivation, at times the ideas come from different places and they make me move. Anyway, I'd only motivate an Si lead to do shit if they want me to, lmao, but i often take it as they don't want that if they don't already do it themselves, I only like helping Si leads when it comes to ideas and different ways to achieve things or projects, motivation wise? If you don't want to do shit for yourself, that's not a "me" issue.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Reyne View Post
    By myself? I'm generally in some sort of survival mode. I give a lot of value to eating the right amount of food, sleeping enough, training and this kind of stuff. I'm kinda blind to the "colors" of this stuff. If I need X grams of protein, I'll get by that. Doesn't matter if I hate chicken. In fact since I'm by myself I'll just boil the chicken with no seasoning. Not even oil or salt. I dislike cooking and chores so much that I reached the point of having one meal a day. Tons of chicken and vegetables in that meal, everyday. Or for example with training, I tend to overlook injuries. I fucked up my knee and just continued running more than 10km everyday just because I decided to do it.
    I also feel motivated to read tons of stuff about the things I find interesting (it can be history, genealogy, languages, etc), or just think by myself about such things.

    When I'm slacking, I won't get into action. People trying to motivate, for example saying stuff like "come on, you could do this in 1 week!" piss me off. My goals and actions are nobody's business.
    The only thing that makes me feel like I NEED other people is laughter.
    I eventually always reach a point in which I feel the need to joke around other people. usually weeks or months pass. Plus, in relationships I gladly delegate chores regarding food etc.
    That sounds generally intuitive to me. More Si superego than superid IMO.

  32. #32

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    It seems like you were grappling with some tough questions about motivation and direction in life a few years back. It's totally understandable to go through periods of uncertainty, especially when it comes to figuring out your path and finding meaning.

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