I offended the last female ESI on a date so hard that she's done with me. I had no idea what I was doing. I'm an idiot when it comes to interpersonal relationships in general. Plus, I'm divorced from a 20-year marriage and I should know better by now but I don't seem to.
ESI's and LIE's need to find each other early, preferably before age 30, because the social gulf between them just grows with time and it makes meeting each other nearly impossible. Once you've met, things can go better, if the LIE isn't working on being a thoughtless asshole and the ESI isn't working on being an easily outraged moral crusader, but these roles are easy to fall into.
I walked into a coffee shop fresh from a business meeting and wearing my business clothes, and the very attractive and Bohemian female ESI behind the counter said in a quiet aside to her co-worker, "That's the enemy." So you have that to contend with, too.
Well I'll be going to see my friend shortly. Thanks for those who tried to understand me. And don't worry, I'll be keeping six feet * wink *
It's probably not worth anything but I'd like to say sorry that I was being bitchy with the mental health comment to you @thegreenfaerie. I didn't need to be immature and resort to an ad hominem argument. It wasn't nice and I was insensitive to those with actual mental health problems. I'm sure from this conversation I left a bad taste in ur mouth. I can't really change that and I don't expect u to feel any different about me. and that's not really the point of saying sorry. An apology is still deserved for that pettiness on my end. I think it's worth acknowledging that I should not make light of mental health issues regardless of the situation.
I didn't do much better in retaliating bringing up personality disorders and that went against my own values really. I've worked with people with severe mental illness for a long time and I have an immense amount of of care for them. I guess I don't like people who are very manipulative and only out for themselves though, which can sometimes be in line with personality disorders. It was honestly, defense for the most part and potentially just misjudgment. Thank you for apologizing. I don't have significant mental illness issues, but I am struggling right now with some stuff I think mostly pertaining to place in life, and I do struggle with anxiety issues. I'm in the midst of changing my life. It's good you recognize the insensitivity because what if I did have a significant mental illness, that could have been very painful. Thank you once again.
Honestly a lot of LIEs have narcissistic tendencies but I think it's just a front for most of us because we have a lot of pride. Even in the manner we speak it's very like "motivational speaker" esp for certain enneagram types. I feel like I relate a lot to this guy, we have similar demeanor, sense of humor and story telling. Like everything he said, how he said it, is me.
I think he explains how defensive we can get and how it isn't always arrogant. Granted idk if im a 3w4. But he talks about the superego and how we need to step back sometimes.
Anyway if you have the time check it out. He's chill. And it's really worth the watch.
This is prob one of the most important things I'll ever post here.
Since you said you are feeling lost with your place and changes in ur life, im gonna link you to a sort of song/speech that at least for me reminds me of what's important. I hope that it will have the same benefits for u as it has for many people
If you do listen to it, pay attention to the words and try to avoid distractions or chatting with anyone. It's only 5 minutes but totally worth the time. But don't listen to it if ur not going to really hear it. Or if you aren't in the mood to listen to something rn.
It's like an epiphany in a song
And if you think you know the song, doesn't matter! Listen to it again.
I did listen again when I considered sharing it here recently : )
It can be pretty difficult to read the tone of a new stranger online.
I didn't even remember how this thread devolved, I had to take a look. From what I could tell before I arrived, this thread turned into a debate on NightHawk's type, which interested me since it's a typology forum. So I tried voicing an opinion on what could be NH's type based on what others said of NightHawk's behavior off the forum, and I also tried forming an opinion based on NightHawk's forum posts.
I actually wasn't trying to get involved on whatever happened off forum, I understood whatever happened wasn't my business. I still don't know what happened offsite and it's all quite confusing to me. And I don't really care to know what happened so long as people aren't being treated unfairly. It's more the treatment that happened here on the forum that upset me. But at the same time, NH was trying to explain themselves and other offsite drama to me for whatever reason, which I didn't even feel like I should be hearing. I did even try to redirect the topic back to typing a couple times. In any case, it got out of hand.
It's a part of the reason that I don't want to revamp this. But I don't want to ignore your criticisms, or seem like I was passive-aggressively liking your post or anything along the lines of that.
Also, I'd like to apologize to @NightHawk while I still can. I did say a lot of dumb shit and wish I could take it all back. Not going to delete anything though since I think it should be held up there for accountability.
devourer of the sun // consumer of the moon⚹
& you know now,
that anything alone is
& any two things
together is a terror.
Love and Hate are two sides of the same coin.
It takes a mere second for treasure to turn to trash.
Too many cat emojis to be ENTJ. I commend you to the alpha SFs
~ ESTP ~ SLE ~ ESTp ~ Self-Pres 7w8 ~ Sp/Sx ~ Fire Element ~ Aries Sign ~ Beta Quadra ~ Gryffindor House ~ Summer Season ~ SLUEN ~
I think you definitely meet some LIE characteristics, but there are a couple that doesn't quite fit. I think it's normal for LIEs to come off as assertive, domineering, and sometimes impolite (depending on subtype). However, they generally wouldn't be so firm about their own values and identity due to inferior Fi. I think even ILEs can be more assertive about their values than LIEs, because their judgements are more subjective (Ti). There are definitely a lot of variations within a single type though. Since you may have had an ESI mother, she might have had a big influence their personality so you may not be one of those typical undualed LIEs I usually see.
I can't say I know your type from just a couple of comments, however, I think you can provide a photo or two, so we can have a better understanding of what kind of person you are. This can definitely settle some disputes, but only if you are comfortable with it.
I'm type 8 enneagram so that should be even more evidence to support that I'm LIE. I've taken several tests, always type 8. I think visual identification is a very innacurate way to stereotype and doesn't take into account other ethnicities. If you notice the websites only use white people as examples. As if there aren't other people in the world. However, I ironically fit the visual of an LIE. I have a square jaw.
Welcome to the forum then!!!