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Thread: How do I get off my lazy ass

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    Default How do I get off my lazy ass

    ...and actually do something.

    I'm a pretty damn smart and capable person, but I never do anything.
    Okay, so is it the Te PoLR at work here, or the Se suggestive, or both?
    How can I (an IEI, if you haven't guessed already) get myself to work more and procrastinate less? Trust me I've tried a lot.. of things.
    Does anyone have any tips or insights? Any other IEIs who have found some helpful solutions to the problem? Or if anyone just wants to yell at me and whip my lazy ass into shape, das fine too I guess. Thx guys.

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    EIEs seem to get more productive when they really like the people they work with/for, get an enhanced image of themselves when they've produced things that are admired by co-workers/management, have people that look to them for leadership and or have obsessions. For them, productivity seems more an inspiration than a necessity. Although they sometimes place themselves in boxes that they cannot see out of, the really don't like being placed in one by someone else. Procrastination seems to be their way of expressing "I refuse to wear shackles" or "I'm my own boss". Jobs where they're free to ad lib seem to suit them best......

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Go outside, get sunlight, and stay outside the house for as long as possible. Distance yourself from anybody providing you bailouts and free rides. Willpower and productiveness arises from needs, not desires. You need to create those needs.

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    To get energy you often have to ironically expend energy. The human body is amazing in that usually - when you wear something out and use a non living thing it gets worse, not better. Humans are the opposite for the most part. To get energy you have to first act like you already have the energy, ie try to work out at least 45 mins a day doing something that is at least moderately strenously. (a gentle stroll around the park doesn't really cut it) What I call 'faggit IP energy' often just wants to slouch and do nothing naturally. Sometimes u have to work against it and do it anyway and you will feel better all around.

    You have to make sure you really want it. IEIs (LIKE SEis) can be too ambivalent and wishy-washy. IEEs also seem to have this problem at times? But to want it you have to also have the drive to get it.

    Or I guess sexually you could get a sle to "throat fuck" you so to speak and to be so over the top dom you feel power that way, but I find it doesn't work quite like that, again paradoxically- SLEs only tend to throat fuck me in the way that I want if I first gave myself that energy. That just becomes a reflection of energy I already gave myself and besides most people don't really want to risk actually raping me for me to jump start myself lol.
    Last edited by BandD; 02-24-2020 at 07:30 PM.

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    There is a common philosophical conundrum of a person moving a boulder up the hill. What is the point to keep on moving the boulder up the hill as it will just fall down again and its useless and pointless and just drudgery and doesn't have any meaning...

    the purpose is obvious, its to make the person tougher. So when the sadistic boulders of life inevitably come and try to flatten you, they cannot stop you. (or it will take a really huge one to finally 'stop you') Sometimes in life being mediative or having a good heart doesn't get you anywhere, the key actually is to just be strong enough to withstand the storm. That's what 'pushing the boulder' up the hill allows you to do. But at the same time keep on doing it over and over again for it's own sake too much is rather idiotic but that's why duality was invented I suppose.

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    Laziness doesn't exist.

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    Stop blaming external factors. Time is ticking. You are gonna die soon. And you will die not living up to your potential. What a disappointment to yourself.

    You don't need to follow anyone elses rules. You don't need to do what everyone else wants you to. Your time is very short and limited on this earth. You had the opportunity of being born and experience it, every good and bad things, and that also includes laziness and lack of willpower.
    Everyone cares about themselves before caring about you. So you shouldn't rely on others for anything either. They are working on bettering themselves before giving you a helping hand, so you will always be behind everyone else unless you care about yourself and make an effort.

    It always comes down to caring about yourself. Because nobody else will to the extent of doing things for you, or helping you get here and there. Not to the same extent as they do to themselves

    You're on your own, always. You want to be lazy and not get anywhere? Up to you only. You want to be great and do things nobody else can? Also only up to you. Your choice. Stop sitting and waiting for something to happen or someone to appear and help you. That isn't coming, ever. Success isn't something you get from others, or God, from your Dominant or PoLR or whatever you would like to believe. All the merit goes to you, always and ever. Stay still, or conquer the world, it's all on you.
    What's it gonna be?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebelondeck View Post
    EIEs seem to get more productive when they really like the people they work with/for, get an enhanced image of themselves when they've produced things that are admired by co-workers/management, have people that look to them for leadership and or have obsessions. For them, productivity seems more an inspiration than a necessity. Although they sometimes place themselves in boxes that they cannot see out of, the really don't like being placed in one by someone else. Procrastination seems to be their way of expressing "I refuse to wear shackles" or "I'm my own boss". Jobs where they're free to ad lib seem to suit them best......
    You're totally right about that! This perfectly summarizes how it's like when my ESI mother tries to make me be productive. She's also a strong advocate of the "get everything done early in the morning" mindset. Unfortunately, it doesn't go over so well in our strongly Ni-dominated household

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    Quote Originally Posted by BandD View Post
    To get energy you often have to ironically expend energy. The human body is amazing in that usually - when you wear something out and use a non living thing it gets worse, not better. Humans are the opposite for the most part. To get energy you have to first act like you already have the energy, ie try to work out at least 45 mins a day doing something that is at least moderately strenously. (a gentle stroll around the park doesn't really cut it) What I call 'faggit IP energy' often just wants to slouch and do nothing naturally. Sometimes u have to work against it and do it anyway and you will feel better all around.

    You have to make sure you really want it. IEIs (LIKE SEis) can be too ambivalent and wishy-washy. IEEs also seem to have this problem at times? But to want it you have to also have the drive to get it.

    Or I guess sexually you could get a sle to "throat fuck" you so to speak and to be so over the top dom you feel power that way, but I find it doesn't work quite like that, again paradoxically- SLEs only tend to throat fuck me in the way that I want if I first gave myself that energy. That just becomes a reflection of energy I already gave myself and besides most people don't really want to risk actually raping me for me to jump start myself lol.
    at the first part: yes.. after sitting immobile in my chair, perusing socionics websites for hours, even making the slightest movement to get a tissue takes the greatest effort.. i like your term for it
    and unfortunately, there are not SLEs in my life right now, lol.
    @Aramas are you an alien?

    ALSO...... would someone mind explaining to me how to double quote reply in one post??

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    at the first part: yes.. after sitting immobile in my chair, perusing socionics websites for hours, even making the slightest movement to get a tissue takes the greatest effort.. i like your term for it
    and unfortunately, there are not SLEs in my life right now, lol.
    @Aramas are you an alien?

    ALSO...... would someone mind explaining to me how to double quote reply in one post??
    @citronnade, to double quote in a post:

    1. Go to the first post that you want to quote. Hit “Reply with quote”.
    2. When the Quick Reply window opens, copy the quoted text in entirety, including all the text inside the [] marks. Close the window.
    3. Go to the second post that you want to quote. Hit “Reply With Quote”.
    4. When the Quick Reply window opens, paste the copied text where you want it. You can place it anywhere, and you can add text anywhere. You just want to keep it legible.

    If your post doesn’t turn out the way you would like, you can always edit it. The only thing you can’t edit after closing are PM’s, so if you quote in a PM, be careful and check the [] brackets.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    at the first part: yes.. after sitting immobile in my chair, perusing socionics websites for hours, even making the slightest movement to get a tissue takes the greatest effort.. i like your term for it
    and unfortunately, there are not SLEs in my life right now, lol.
    @Aramas are you an alien?

    ALSO...... would someone mind explaining to me how to double quote reply in one post??
    An alien?

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    Isn't it said in socionics literature that Ni doms "appear" to be lazy and not they actually are?

    I personnaly know I can come off as lazy but I don't think I actually am. Not getting everything done before 10 am does not make you lazy.

    Te polr just makes you unmotivated to do things you are not truly interested in. This can be good if you find your passion as it allows you to focus on it.

    Also obviously low te and low se will make you insecure in that area. People's remarks on your productivity might hit more than they should. Learn to brush them off until you are confident enough to take them constructively.

    The question is not "how not to be lazy" but more specificly "what are you not doing that you should be doing?". Then find a way to fulfill what you consider to be your responsabilities in a manner that motivates you.

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    IEI might have very weak Te, but if they are fortunate enough to work with their passion, the hours they put into it will more than make up for it. And even 1D Te will find effective solutions given enough time and experience. Someone with 1D Te who has worked their whole life at the same workplace doing the same things over and over will have devleoped effective solutions for most tasks over time, but can have trouble developing efficient methods for a new task quickly.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    ...and actually do something.
    What is it that you mean by "something"? Is that "something" something you want to do, or is it something other people want you to do and therefore have planted a truckload full of social constructions about proper things to do in your head?

    Perhaps you need to be de-programmed first, get rid of of the constructs in your head about what it means "to do something", which in our western cultures is typically Te-oriented.

    Let me share an anecdote with you: recently I bought a new cassette tape from Australia from an artist called "Collector", the album is called "Prosthetic" (actually a very NiSe album, you might like it). Me, having about a thousand unused cassettes still unopened, could easily have made my own tape, but such a thing is not the real deal, I want a tape released by the artist themselves. So I paid like 17 Australian dollars to get this tape delivered to my door. When it finally arrived, I was hugely disappointed, first of all because there were no labels on the cassette itself! What were these guys thinking? Speaking of being lazy! Also, the tape was badly recorded. I had to re-record the cassette, and decided to make the labels myself. Took me a lot of time.

    Now from a POV of being productive, this was totally so not productive at all. What is it I have accomplished? Nothing at all, but I did enjoy myself in the meantime. And I have a nice cassette that I can mentally masturbate on:



    What have I accomplished by posting this? Nothing productive whatsoever, we might even say I have wasted a lot of my precious time. But I do feel a sense of meaning in having posted this, if only for the reason of hearing my own inner voice. And having it turned from something subjective in my head into something objective outside of me, something that I and other people can perceive.

    Your problem probably is that you are not doing anything that you really want to do, deep down inside. As a result, you are not going to be productive in the area of making something of your life. In a sense, you are passively-aggressively protesting against the demands your social environment puts on you. The solution to this dilemma, is to start doing those things you really want to do, so there will no longer be a reason to passively-aggressively protest against the demands of the world. You will finally enjoy that liberating feeling of having brushed your teeth and combed your hair in time!

    Perhaps the book "The Now Habit" by Neil Fiore is a good read to get you started. Neil, quite contrary to all those self-help books that try to teach you how to plan or NLP yourself out of procrastination, he turns things upside down. He does teach you how to plan, but in a very unorthodox way. E.g., if you make a plan for the upcoming week, he tells you to first plan the fun, leisurely things. This to get a message in your head that life is not first and foremost about "work first, play later", which is what you conclude from what your social environment wants from you. Also, his approach to getting things done is unorthodox: instead of teaching how to work towards finalizing a goal, he teaches you to just start working for 30 minutes and not think or worry about getting things done. Before you know it, getting things done will have taken care of itself.

    Now have some fun:



    ETA: this advice is specifically aimed at IEIs. It should not be applied unthinkingly by other types, especially not by IEEs.
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    Last edited by consentingadult; 03-05-2020 at 11:05 AM.
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    Many black Americans are SEE type.

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    @citronnade, if you want to get motivated, work at something where your work makes a difference.

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    Work more at what specifically?

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    @Aramas yes, an alien gifted with no-procrastination abilities

    @YXPR thanks for the perspective!!

    @consentingadult
    nice cassette! i listened to the music- it's very interesting. it reminds me of an album i found recently (but haven't fully listened to yet) called Vae Victis by Secession Studios & Greg Dombrowski. Maybe you'll enjoy it too. and thanks a lot for the insight. I never thought about things that way before. it's really helpful.


    Also, I didn't realize a big part at play is my Te PoLr-- i assumed it was my weak Se.

    @inaLim Although I'm a good student-- my schoolwork. and the part that really frustrates me is that for whatever reason, if I haven't finished my schoolwork yet, I can't seem to let myself start doing something more for myself either (or, it's hard), which makes me end up doing nothing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    @Aramas yes, an alien gifted with no-procrastination abilities

    @YXPR thanks for the perspective!!

    @consentingadult
    nice cassette! i listened to the music- it's very interesting. it reminds me of an album i found recently (but haven't fully listened to yet) called Vae Victis by Secession Studios & Greg Dombrowski. Maybe you'll enjoy it too. and thanks a lot for the insight. I never thought about things that way before. it's really helpful.


    Also, I didn't realize a big part at play is my Te PoLr-- i assumed it was my weak Se.

    @inaLim Although I'm a good student-- my schoolwork. and the part that really frustrates me is that for whatever reason, if I haven't finished my schoolwork yet, I can't seem to let myself start doing something more for myself either (or, it's hard), which makes me end up doing nothing.
    No. I mean laziness as a concept is not an accurate description of human nature.

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    Try setting short-term goals that you can achieve. In the range of 3-6 months is quite achievable even for an IEI, but if that doesn't help then set even shorter goals like for 2-3 weeks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
    Try setting short-term goals that you can achieve. In the range of 3-6 months is quite achievable even for an IEI, but if that doesn't help then set even shorter goals like for 2-3 weeks.
    Shorter.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    Shorter.
    30-seconds goals. Set a goal that you'll get out of bed in the next 30 seconds. Get out of bed and ta-da! you've already accomplished one goal lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
    30-seconds goals. Set a goal that you'll get out of bed in the next 30 seconds. Get out of bed and ta-da! you've already accomplished one goal lol
    Lol. Maybe a weekend goal. 3-6 month goal sounds anxiety inducing to me and I'm also 1D Te.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aramas View Post
    No. I mean laziness as a concept is not an accurate description of human nature.
    It’s a description of my nature. Does that make me inhuman?
    As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods. They kill us for their sport.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
    30-seconds goals. Set a goal that you'll get out of bed in the next 30 seconds. Get out of bed and ta-da! you've already accomplished one goal lol
    lmao. honestly, yeah

    i don't think i can handle anything over a month long. it's too far off. if there's no hard deadline (aka urgency) i'll never get to it!

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    I've tried to set goals by week before, but I end up getting so anxious/stressed about all I need to get done and it's always hovering over my mind. logical result: i don't get any of it done AND i'm more stressed than i would've been before.
    I think maybe, one or two days goals (v short-term) would be the best. I'll try it out. maybe i can give myself some longer term goals too but i'm not sure how it will work out...

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    Quote Originally Posted by FreelancePoliceman View Post
    It’s a description of my nature. Does that make me inhuman?
    Problem is with your first sentence. It's just a contradiction. Lol

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    Multitask? Unless you need to be in the zone and 100% focused there is no reason why you can't do other things while you are browsing the internet.

    Do something fun while you are being productive. Especially if you are going to spend more than an hour on something important.

    Upload things to your phone/email so you can do it anytime/anywhere. <<one reason why I hate my iPhone, it's incompatible with Windows software. I might actually get another phone soon.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    lmao. honestly, yeah

    i don't think i can handle anything over a month long. it's too far off. if there's no hard deadline (aka urgency) i'll never get to it!
    Story of my life. I feel like you saying my exact thoughts in your following posts.

    I think the best way to get off your ass though is to do something you actually care about. I have your same struggle but that's the fastest way for me to do it, besides having urgency.

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    Something I tried today is on a post-it (post-its are the best), I wrote down when I started doing something and then when I finished I wrote the finishing time, and I write what I did. So something like:
    11:45-12:35: essay
    12:45-1:10: math
    For every task I did. For some reason it worked quite well.. and I feel like it could feasibly keep working. Idk why it worked, but if any other IEIs want to try it out

    (Focusing isn't a problem for me, it's just getting started that is hard) I'll test it out for a bit more and then let you guys know if it works
    And I decided I'm going to set some week/two-week goals.

    @COOL AND MANLY , i'm not great at multitasking.. actually, i may be bad at starting to do a task, but when I do it, I do it and i'm very focused, yknow? otherwise it feels like i'm not actually working and just being distracted.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    ...and actually do something.

    I'm a pretty damn smart and capable person, but I never do anything.
    Okay, so is it the Te PoLR at work here, or the Se suggestive, or both?
    How can I (an IEI, if you haven't guessed already) get myself to work more and procrastinate less? Trust me I've tried a lot.. of things.
    Does anyone have any tips or insights? Any other IEIs who have found some helpful solutions to the problem? Or if anyone just wants to yell at me and whip my lazy ass into shape, das fine too I guess. Thx guys.
    Find goals that are actually worthy to chase. Are the little tasks in your everyday life leading up to something bigger? Does every piece of time and effort in your life line up to fulfill your deepest desires? If the answer is yes you will find no resistance in chasing your dreams. If you, however, are suppressing what you really want deep down and are just doing something society wants you to do, then no.

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    Something I tried today is on a post-it (post-its are the best), I wrote down when I started doing something and then when I finished I wrote the finishing time, and I write what I did. So something like:
    11:45-12:35: essay
    12:45-1:10: math
    For every task I did. For some reason it worked quite well.. and I feel like it could feasibly keep working. Idk why it worked, but if any other IEIs want to try it out


    (Focusing isn't a problem for me, it's just getting started that is hard) I'll test it out for a bit more and then let you guys know if it works
    And I decided I'm going to set some week/two-week goals.

    @COOL AND MANLY , i'm not great at multitasking.. actually, i may be bad at starting to do a task, but when I do it, I do it and i'm very focused, yknow? otherwise it feels like i'm not actually working and just being distracted.
    I have done this same exact thing, seriously it's like we're twins or something. I also love post it notes because if I write real big I can only fit 1 bite sized goal on there, so I don't overwhelm myself with a huge list. And seeing a pile of completed post it notes is a visual indicator of progress, which feels nice to look back at.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    I have done this same exact thing, seriously it's like we're twins or something. I also love post it notes because if I write real big I can only fit 1 bite sized goal on there, so I don't overwhelm myself with a huge list. And seeing a pile of completed post it notes is a visual indicator of progress, which feels nice to look back at.
    Wow, really? High five!
    I have so many post it notes on my desk, haha. I always trash them once I'm done, but after what you mentioned I'll start keeping them around

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    Quote Originally Posted by citronnade View Post
    ...and actually do something.

    I'm a pretty damn smart and capable person, but I never do anything.
    Okay, so is it the Te PoLR at work here, or the Se suggestive, or both?
    How can I (an IEI, if you haven't guessed already) get myself to work more and procrastinate less? Trust me I've tried a lot.. of things.
    Does anyone have any tips or insights? Any other IEIs who have found some helpful solutions to the problem? Or if anyone just wants to yell at me and whip my lazy ass into shape, das fine too I guess. Thx guys.
    1. Set Goals

    Write a list of things you want to accomplish and experience and WHY you want those things.

    Ex: I want to get a job so I can make more money which helps me live and feel good about myself.

    This will help you stay focused vs throwing a dart with no target.

    2. The Energetic/Vibrational method

    Write a list of:

    --5 things in the past you are thankful for
    --5 things in the present you are thankful for
    --5 things in the future (from exercise 1) you are thankful for..

    **Important**

    If you want a job for example, write it as if you already have it : "I'm thankful for the new job I have"

    This will focus your energy on what you WANT and not what you don't want.

    Now, shuffle all 15 of those (perhaps write them on a notecard)

    Everyday spend some time going through those cards.

    Read them aloud, if possible, and really vision yourself and how thankful you are.

    Why do we do this?

    --The ego blocks the subconscious from making changes.

    --Feeling good soothes the ego.

    --Gratitude/focusing on being thankful is a method of feeling good.

    --When the ego is soothed, the subconscious has an easier time transferring energy/vibrations into the world. It was also have an easier time making deep changes.

    Since you already have good vibrations on the things of the past and present----> this state transfer to spill over to your "future cards" and help you manifest these things. God will help "make things happen" for you; whether that's getting an email response, running into a person that helps give you opportunities, etc.

    3. The Hustle Method

    Set a schedule with a list of small baby steps to reach the goal. You can divide them in a couple ways:

    --High priority tasks (ex: Apply to 3 jobs/day)
    --Medium priority tasks (ex: study for the exam at least twice a week)
    --Low priority tasks (ex: email contacts, etc)

    Give yourself a star-sticker to help yourself with positive reinforcement every time you complete a task.

    4. Have an accountability partner

    --Often undervalued, but like having a friend push you to go to the gym, making a promise that you'll get someone done and having a friend checkup on you, will automatically give you the motivation to follow-through
    Last edited by onfireee; 04-05-2020 at 06:03 AM.
    He always finds a way

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