I'm having a lot of trouble understanding what exactly SEE's are expected to be drawn towards their dual, at least in my experience they're drawn more towards popular notions of what is "attractive" (by society), like charisma, even if their dual would not exemplify these traits. From my own point of view, it seems like SEE's embody an unusually large amount of "attractive traits" and ILI's (being their opposite) are more "unattractive". Even excerpts from Stratiyevskaya say that ILI's are more often overweight, naturally uncharismatic, and give little thought towards how they dress, and it makes little sense on how an SEE would ever subject themselves towards someone like this, though at the same time they said that the ILI would be the only partner the SEE could safely cheat on once or twice, which is slightly extreme to presume.
I've been trying to find the best way to search for a dual the past few months and I've found that "Se" dominant people are generally found in fitness classes (which may be obvious, just look at these articles about "crossfit guys / girls") but most Se dominant people in these classes who were already taken were not taken by what I would assume is a Ni partner, though EIE appeared to be #1 in my area.
The closest I can come to understand what role an ILI would fulfill for an SEE is that ILI's are simply a need that SEE's don't understand they have? That's pretty shitty. I'm hoping I can find something more tangible, and so I really welcome any ideas or experiences you have.