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Thread: When are you "ready" for your dual?

  1. #41
    Emily's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viktor View Post
    I can be your bodyguard, but I take payment in beer and kisses
    Seems easy enough.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post


    Paul Simon - EII
    Chevy Chase - ILE

    What is happening. In this video, in life in general...but especially at 1:45. He did NOT just whip out a piccolo.

  3. #43
    lkdhf qkb's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
    It depends on the age and preferences of each dual. I mean you are ready for someone if you are in the same wavelenght. Its not the same an IEE male 20 yo on collegue in the US to an christian IEE female on her 35 with a child in Tailand. Even when they are both the same type their lifestyle and needs are different.
    It takes some time to get to the same "wavelengths" so the question is still valid. For example, at my work only the older SLIs hang out with me. The ones my age (mid 20s) prefer hanging out with other thinking types.
    Last edited by lkdhf qkb; 02-02-2020 at 05:09 PM.
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  4. #44
    Aaron Something's Avatar
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    I don't know. I met my SLI not long ago when I was like, in really hard hard times, and it still works. I don't think there is a formula for that. But yeah. I left a lot of vices behind, thanks Cthulhu. I used to be kind of an addict before, so i'm glad I met her when I no longer was one, so that's cool.

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    I'm 53 and libido is what makes me want to be in a relationship with a woman first and foremost. If sex is not the main reason, I might just as well share my life with a man. That would probably be a lot easier ;-)

    On a more serious note: I do think libido often is driven by all kinds of frustrations and stress, and that duality, once happening, can actually lessen the neurotic nature of ones sex drive, decreasing the need for sex (as a way of letting off steam).
    I read this post and I can't stop thinking about it. @consentingadult, are you saying that the only reason to be in a relationship with a woman is sex?

    I mean, sex is very, very important to me in a relationship, but if it were the only thing I wanted, I'd just hire it out. It would be a lot cheaper.

  6. #46
    Socionics is a spook ashlesha's Avatar
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    I thought LIEs always hired out their duals (;

  7. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by ashlesha View Post
    I thought LIEs always hired out their duals (;
    Do you mean, LIE's hire out their duals like the operators of a temp agency which finds work for workers, or LIE's hire duals like a person paying for sex?

    I used to think that I would never, ever pay for sex. I only wanted sex with a woman who truly loves me (and that is actually still true). But I have since come to realize that there are many ways of paying for sex, and not all of them mean that the participants don't love each other.



    I was married for many years to an SLI woman whom I loved, and initially, we had a fair amount of sex, but the frequency quickly dropped to less than once a month and the last few years were entirely sex-free. (If you are on the Aggressor-Victim axis, don't try to cross the line to the Caregiver-Infantile axis. You will regret it, no matter what your dick thinks right now. Incidentally, sex only got better with both of my Aggressor LSI GF's.)
    Considering the amount of cash my ex-wife took from the divorce, those individual sex acts were each ungodly expensive.



    *EDIT*
    I've been thinking about this, and I've concluded that I would definitely pay an ESI that I know for sex once or twice, just to get her attention. After that, we can negotiate.

    I think LIE's are probably best among all types with the concept of paying people for services rendered. If we don't have the money ourselves, we will find someone who can pay in our stead for the services.
    It's all those Contracts, Money, and low Fi that we are made of.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 02-03-2020 at 05:11 PM.

  8. #48
    Socionics is a spook ashlesha's Avatar
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    Loling at the loving husband & pimp concept.

  9. #49
    Jesus is the cruel sausage consentingadult's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    I read this post and I can't stop thinking about it. @consentingadult, are you saying that the only reason to be in a relationship with a woman is sex?

    I mean, sex is very, very important to me in a relationship, but if it were the only thing I wanted, I'd just hire it out. It would be a lot cheaper.
    there was a smiley at the end of the last line, so that would have meant to take it with a grain of salt. But I did not say 'only', but 'first and foremost', so sex is not the only reason. That being said, sex is an important reason, and biologically probably the most important reason, to be in a relationship with a woman, because, like I said, if it is not, than you might as well hook up with anyone, even someone of your own sex. Or if you are homosexual, you might just as well hook up with someone from the opposite sex. All other aspects for which we engage into a relationship, we can realize with a person of whatever sex. I could share my life with another man, build a future together, get a home with a mortgage, a car, even children, to some extent I could realize an emotional connection with a man (like I do with male family members and friend), but I would not feel the need for having sex with a man.

    I think if we were to really scrutinize our motivations, stripping it of all social constructions modern western societies invented to attribute to the meaning of relationships, sex, in it's widest meaning of the term, is the first and foremost reason. I do not believe in this "women are from Venus and men are from Mars" kind of BS, which some people provide as the reason for man-women relationships, in which each sex has to learn to deal with the oddities of the other sex, exactly because Socionics as well as Jung's theories on animus/anima teach us that man and women are not all that different and that a lot of differences people believe in are just social, cultural constructs, not biological facts. Take a any couple with a female logical type and a male ethical type, for example: who's often wearing the pants?

    As for buying sex: sex is not just lust, it is also intimacy. (and, I dare say, as one gets older, intimacy in sex becomes a lot more important than lust). As far as I can tell, you can't really buy intimacy, intimacy being defined as the capacity to emotional connection, which reaches no greater peak than while making love. Even if someone wanted to sell it, it can't practically happen: intimacy needs time for growth, trust, a certain degree of commitment etc. (and in my case an absolute degree of commitment, because no matter what, I make it a point to be always emotionally available to my GF if she needs me to be available, and I also expect the same from her, so there can be no screwing around, literally and figuratively speaking).
    Last edited by consentingadult; 02-03-2020 at 06:03 PM.
    The future of Socionics:
    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    Many black Americans are SEE type.

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    @consentingadult, I like what you said about intimacy.

    Maybe I didn't mention it because, to me, that part is like water to a fish.

  11. #51
    Jesus is the cruel sausage consentingadult's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    @consentingadult, I like what you said about intimacy.

    Maybe I didn't mention it because, to me, that part is like water to a fish.
    It is like water to a fish. I won't speak for all young people, but I do think that for younger people in general, sex tends more towards lust than intimacy, so it might not be obvious to everyone.
    The future of Socionics:
    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    Many black Americans are SEE type.

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    Back to the topic of this thread: when are you ready for your dual. Well, Dream Theater provided the answer in their song "Metropolis Part I - The Miracle and The Sleeper":



    The smile of dawn arrived early May
    She carried a gift from her home
    The night shed a tear to tell her of fear
    And of sorrow and pain
    She'll never outgrow
    Death is the first dance, eternal

    There's no more freedom
    The both of you will be
    confined to this mind

    I was told there's a miracle for each day that I try
    I was told there's a new love
    that's born for each one that has died
    I was told there'd be no one to
    call on when I feel alone and afraid
    I was told if you dream of the next world
    You'll find yourself swimming in a lake of fire

    As a child, I thought I could
    live without pain without sorrow
    As a man I've found it's all caught up with me
    I'm asleep yet I'm so afraid

    Somewhere like a scene from a memory
    There's a picture worth a thousand words
    Eluding stares from faces before me
    It hides away and will never be heard of again
    Deceit is the second without end

    The city's cold blood teaches us to survive
    Just keep my heart in your eyes and we'll stay alive
    The third arrives

    Before the leaves have fallen
    Before we lock the doors
    There must be the third and last dance
    This one will last forever
    Metropolis watches and thoughtfully smiles
    She's taken you to your home
    It can only take place
    When the struggle between
    our children has ended
    Now the Miracle and the
    Sleeper know that the third is love
    Love is the dance of eternity
    The future of Socionics:
    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    Many black Americans are SEE type.

  13. #53
    a two horned unicorn renegade COVID 007's Avatar
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    I have tought that relationships are for conforming losers and real life is in dusty lab to be honest. Not much has changed, yet. As for libido I must ask: What is that? I never really wanted it because the act itself looks too much to be bothered in the end.
    Measuring you right now

    Winning is for losers

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    You are ready for an LIE when you are ready to get AIDS.

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    Aaron Something's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
    You are ready for an LIE when you are ready to get AIDS.
    I have the most savage duals, omfg i'm dying

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
    You are ready for an LIE when you are ready to get AIDS.
    This explains why my SLI ex-wife refuses to kiss me when I visit her and our son.

    Well, whatever the reason, I’ll take the results. Lol.

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    Aaron Something's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    This explains why my SLI ex-wife refuses to kiss me when I visit her and our son.

    Well, whatever the reason, I’ll take the results. Lol.
    You're the Kool-AIDs Man.

  18. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    This explains why my SLI ex-wife refuses to kiss me when I visit her and our son.

    Well, whatever the reason, I’ll take the results. Lol.
    To hire, cheaper and sex in the same sentence sound like a good formula to get aids.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aaron Something View Post
    I have the most savage duals
    ^-^

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
    To hire, cheaper and sex in the same sentence sound like a good formula to get aids.
    Aids, or something else.

    Yes, and this is the reason I insisted that my last GF and I get tested for STD's before we did anything. There are things out there that are not curable, and I want to stay away from them.

    Before I was married, I didn't really take any precautions at all, and was just very, very lucky to not get anything. Most of my partners then were educated and young and hadn't had many partners themselves. But you never know, and it pays to be careful. One of my best friends got an incurable STD from banging the city mayor's wife. She was quite a bit older than he was, though, and might have gotten around more.

  21. #61
    Jesus is the cruel sausage consentingadult's Avatar
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    I got crab once. The bad part was that I didn't even get if from sex. Had I gotten it through sex, then at least I would have had sex, but all I got was bad luck twice...
    The future of Socionics:
    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    Many black Americans are SEE type.

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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    I got crab once. The bad part was that I didn't even get if from sex. Had I gotten it through sex, then at least I would have had sex, but all I got was bad luck twice...
    How?

  23. #63
    Jesus is the cruel sausage consentingadult's Avatar
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    I'm not sure: at the time I was working as a turn down attendant in a hotel. One day shortly before that I wore a pair of uniform pants that had been worn by another colleague, because they ran out of clean pants. That might have been the cause. Another one is that during work I carried large piles of used towels out the rooms I was getting ready for the night, perhaps they came that way.

    The last time I had sex was two months before, according to my doctor I should have had problems much sooner if it was transmitted during that last sex session.
    The future of Socionics:
    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    Many black Americans are SEE type.

  24. #64
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    For me duality came with a high level of instant intimacy and I wasn't ready for it at the time. It was seamless communication that felt like telepathy. I panicked and got irrationally scared because of attachment and childhood issues so I pushed him away. He was persistent and this required me hurting him and probably confusing him and I still feel guilt and regret about the whole thing. I was young and a bit of a mess back then. I'm ready for my dual now but not sure where in the world he is. I imagine him maybe living his life somewhere in my city doing exciting things but with a tinge of emptiness without me.

    IME you're ready for your dual whenever you decide to be. Most likely the only thing standing in your way is you and your own mental blocks.

  25. #65
    ТРВЕ КВЛТ xXdedXx's Avatar
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    Never/always

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    Quote Originally Posted by Muddy View Post
    Me and my body are always ready ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
    It's official. I'm muddys dual. Take me.

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