Originally Posted by
Adam Strange
Last summer, I went on a date with an ESI who owns a lawn care company, and I liked her. I think she liked me, too, but I did something pretty stupid on that date. Because I had a previous GF who liked physically demonstrated affection (she liked to be patted on the ass), and because I'm a complete fucking idiot when it comes to relationships, when the ESI decided she finally had to go home, I smacked her on the ass as she went out the door.
She turned around and said, "Did you just smack my ass?"
I said yes.
She turned without a word and walked to her car, thinking furiously.
When I asked her out again, she refused. When I asked her out again, she refused. When I asked her out again, she told me that I was permanently on her shit list, and if I ever wanted to talk to her again, it would have to be in a professional context only.
OK, I get it. I'm an idiot, case closed. However, she actually is good at lawn care, so I've called her for yard service and she has sent some of her people over to take care of some small projects.
When a woman tells me she isn't interested, I take her at her word. If I had any romantic interest in her before, I stop. I just stop. I turn it off and treat her like any guy that I used to know. She becomes the grizzled old guy at the hardware store. It seems best that way. That way, I can at least salvage some benefits from knowing someone whom I once judged to be valuable.
So I called her last week and asked if she could move a rose bush for me. She texted back and said that she could make that happen this week, when it would be warmer. I thought, "Great! That rose bush can be moved into sunlight and will live."
But then a weird thing happened. As the days went by, she'd send me little texts that seemed job-related but inconsequential. Like, she didn't have to send me that text to do the job. And the timing was strange. She wouldn't respond right away, as I did, but instead she'd take a hour or so, as if she was thinking thinking thinking before responding.
Today, I got a text from her saying that she was outside and where is the rose bush? I realized that she had decided to do the job herself. I went out to show it to her, and she was pacing back and forth, all smiles until she saw me. As I led her to the back yard, she said "Something has changed."
Well, yeah, it did. That switch flipped. What was she expecting?