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Thread: Solution to feeling bad about yourself

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    xerxe xerxe's Avatar
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    Default Solution to feeling bad about yourself

    When you're feeling like shit and sorry for yourself, what do you normally do (if anything) to feel differently?


    I personally watch videos like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XG7nSiiHphk&t=312

    Discuss.
    Last edited by xerxe; 09-02-2019 at 05:14 AM.

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    I used to get tremendously drunk, but since I stopped drinking, I now take a short nap.

    When life hands you lemons, it erodes your strength and your ability to handle problems, but “sleep, that knits up the raveled sleave of care”, is an excellent remedy.

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    Bill Nye's Avatar
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    So many ways to cope - but at the end of the day, we gotta get up and keep goin
    Even gravity won't hold back your tears from science.

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    Autochauvinist Grendel's Avatar
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    Remember that virtually nothing I did was on my own real merit, even though I still manage to fall short. That forces me to see the situation as deserved. But I still remain burnt out and lost.

    Consolation doesn't pierce through to me at all, so I have to let the bad stuff run its course on me. Let time nurse me, and anxiety keep me warm.
    Quote Originally Posted by Singu View Post
    Shut the fuck up, dumbass.


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    an object in motion woofwoofl's Avatar
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    Rest! Complete the day. Clear out grunt work -- ruined day is already ruined, time to get ready for next one.
    p . . . a . . . n . . . d . . . o . . . r . . . a
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    I ask myself questions, what led to this, how this can be fixed, why do I feel this way, what do I actually want to do with this... When I can't figure out any answers, I just give up, focus elsewhere as I know they will come with time, and if they don't maybe they aren't that important.

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    f.k.a Oprah sbbds's Avatar
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    - Eat foods rich in Vitamin C
    - Take selfies - makeover
    - Nature videos
    - Masturbation

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    lemontrees's Avatar
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    I read someone way more angsty than me (like St. Augustine's Confessions or Soren Kierkegaard) and it triggers my feeling that angst is a bit funny?

    but usually i dig into it first rather than suppress it, but feeling sorry for and down on myself is sort of default due to e-type i think and it might be a more unhealthy place for someone else to be. noticing other ppl's insecurities or suffering does help, not when it's out of self-flagellation but more out of shared experience or something to trigger genuine gratitude. having compassion for "why i did x"

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    oh, cute animal pics. adventure time music videos.


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    ТРВЕ КВЛТ DarkAngelFireWolf69's Avatar
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    listen to sad/angry music, play guitar, in the worst of cases I get hammered but that only makes it worse really, in the best of cases I go running - it helps me get out of myself

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    The video you posted would make my condition even worse. Loud music helps, it prevents my brain from creating essays in my head about why i am a piece of shit. Also animal videos.

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    I think about what led to the situation, make choices about what is really important to me, focus on what is and work with myself until I adapt to it, or if it's not important I have to decide if I'm going to dismiss it or build some rules around it so that next time it happens I am better equipped to create a positive outcome.

    As far as how does my personality/routine change during that time I just listen to my mood and how it resonates with everyday choices and then act based on that. This is not necessarily the greatest thing in the world for keeping mental stability over the long run but it works in the now.

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    Do something that gets adrenaline pumping like riding a rollercoaster. Otherwise, all you can really do is just wait it out.

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    i self-inquire (KB method) or cry or both

    edit: this is a solution to feeling good about yourself as well
    Last edited by Kalinoche the Child; 09-03-2019 at 08:58 PM.
    honest labor needs no master

    Nothing good is a miracle, nothing lovely is a dream.

    Επί πάντων μέμνησο τα έσχατά σου, και ου μη αμαρτήσης

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    I have too many other mental issues to deal with for me to feel bad about myself tbh. Too much existential fear to care about my self worth.

    I'm not sure what it's like to feel bad about myself. I think I try to avoid it? Mildly narcissistic I know.

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    Quote Originally Posted by kalinoche View Post
    i self-inquire (KB method) or cry or both

    edit: this is a solution to feeling good about yourself as well
    This?
    "The KB test is the standard method of quantitating fetal–maternal hemorrhage (FMH)."

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    Kalinoche the Child's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ouronis View Post
    This?
    "The KB test is the standard method of quantitating fetal–maternal hemorrhage (FMH)."
    no kb stands for katie byron
    <-------------------------
    honest labor needs no master

    Nothing good is a miracle, nothing lovely is a dream.

    Επί πάντων μέμνησο τα έσχατά σου, και ου μη αμαρτήσης

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    Quote Originally Posted by kalinoche View Post
    no kb stands for katie byron
    <-------------------------
    Oh. Sounds along the same vein as what I do. Maybe
    Here's her four questions for the curious:
    Q1. Is it true?
    Q2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
    Q3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
    Q4. Who would you be without that thought?

    I'd say I do that plus I might just say well - I ought to just admit it and move on. I don't like it but I need it or whatever.

    Btw, when I google Katie Byron I only get results for Byron Katie.

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    Kalinoche the Child's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ouronis View Post
    Oh. Sounds along the same vein as what I do. Maybe
    Here's her four questions for the curious:
    Q1. Is it true?
    Q2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
    Q3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
    Q4. Who would you be without that thought?

    I'd say I do that plus I might just say well - I ought to just admit it and move on. I don't like it but I need it or whatever.

    Btw, when I google Katie Byron I only get results for Byron Katie.
    she uses both versions of the name. Yes these 4 questions are about 50% of the method. Basically you write down a belief following the instructions and then you do the questions and the turnaround(s) for each part of the belief. Here is an excerpt from an early book of hers which sums it up clearly enough IMO.

    Also, there are pdfs with detailed instructions on her website and there is an online community (mainly FB) whose members facilitate each other in inquiries.
    honest labor needs no master

    Nothing good is a miracle, nothing lovely is a dream.

    Επί πάντων μέμνησο τα έσχατά σου, και ου μη αμαρτήσης

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    Exercise maybe. Though 'doing' something different won't bring any better results if the underlying thinking patterns are self-defeating while doing it. So oftentimes it's more about changing subconscious negative thought patterns that no longer serve me. And I think it is important to realize that for a time, I developed them as a safety mechanism or a genetic pattern I inherited but regardless- they are no longer needed. Judging them too much as 'bad' also just might make me hate myself even more so I try not to go there. More like 'this sucks and it just isn't working.'

    By 'negative' I guess what I really mean to say is unnecessarily corrupting or decaying, in a way that isn't about the natural entropy of time but something more 'evil' and perverse. Like an apple instantly turning rotten when you touch it instead of dying naturally over the course of its time. Because reality itself is negative and sad/dreary, denying this fact is just being naive. Its more like, your internals aren't so self-destructive even tho the outside world is what it is, you develop a greater state of homeostasis. Because poor mental health will make you want to hang yourself or do something really stupid and self-destructive even when everything on the outside is healthy and fine. It's the same concept of why wealthy and/or popular people with a huge support network can still kill themselves or feel like utter dog shit deep inside. Or how sometimes you have some minor health issue but your mind makes you think it's cancer.

    Its also interesting to me that when you are neurotic and generally unhappy, you tend to dread anything bad happening (even though you already feel like shit internally), but when you are very happy- you don't care if something bad physically happens because you are at peace on the inside. 'If I die right now it will be all right' is often a feeling ppl feel under intense romance. Also you don't have to try as hard to convince everybody on the outside your life is good, or super ego bullshit like that. My dad always said something that calmed me and my mom. He said 'stop worrying. It won't ever be good anyway' and we all just laughed, cuz of how true it is.

    It also helps me to be nice to myself and realize I don't have to necessarily feel good about myself, I just have to feel not so shitty.

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    Haikus
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    fix it.

    teach yourself to learn how to accept yourself.

    movement.

    music.

    get over it.

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    Tearsofaclown's Avatar
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    Nobody even noticed when Icarus fell.

    "And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it, and shall desire to die, and death shall flee from them."

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    Quote Originally Posted by xerxe View Post
    When you're feeling like shit and sorry for yourself, what do you normally do (if anything) to feel differently?


    I personally watch videos like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XG7nSiiHphk&t=312

    Discuss.
    Ime such feelings are temporary. Usually it's enough to sleep for a bit until those feelings are gone and then take measures to solve whatever problems caused those feelings in the first place - if necessary.

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    the general idea. when you feel bad - you have problems in something and see it as hard to solve. switch to other regions and get positive results there

    parts of depressive states are
    1. selfesteem below correct one. when you do something successfully, even small and not hard, then objectivity fixes the mind
    2. the lack of pleasure. do anything what you like

    also
    do something new. even minor. the brain will work differently during that. positive results will be more pleasant
    Jung's functions. pay more of your attention and make more activity in superid and lesser in superego
    physical activity reduces hormones which support negative emotions
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    i dont do anything i just sit in it or write about it, cry about it, just get it out of my system

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    Dark Rainbow bouncingoffclouds's Avatar
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    sober train, yay : )

    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    I used to get tremendously drunk, but since I stopped drinking, I now take a short nap.

    When life hands you lemons, it erodes your strength and your ability to handle problems, but “sleep, that knits up the raveled sleave of care”, is an excellent remedy.
    "I am my own muse. I am the subject I know best, the subject I want to know better."
    4 core, sx/so slight sx bend, xNFp Melancholic, Negotiator, Explorer




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    Dark Rainbow bouncingoffclouds's Avatar
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    to be honest, i talked to a friend about this very thing recently, she seems very similar to myself in ways, and she said she has to get out and do things... i've realized, she's right. it seems like, although it's hard to push myself to do things, i usually always feel better after. it's when you're sitting at home with your thoughts for a while shit starts to head south. getting out, getting active, doing something, being engaged somehow in something, even if its connecting to nature or whatever, is helpful
    "I am my own muse. I am the subject I know best, the subject I want to know better."
    4 core, sx/so slight sx bend, xNFp Melancholic, Negotiator, Explorer




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