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Thread: LIE and courtesy

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    Socionics is a spook ashlesha's Avatar
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    Default LIE and courtesy

    I'm sure this isn't the case based on my experience with LIEs just online, but I'm making a thread cuz I have a lot of time on my hands.

    I know one irl LIE now pretty well, cuz i live in his house, and the one thing that stands out to me about him as a person is the freakish amount of courtesy he possesses. He had surgery the other day and I asked him how he was feeling and he said with a pity-filled voice, "I didn't go through 1% of what you did," even though he just had surgery..Si polr, I guess, but he's fucking entitled to bitch. He asked if it was rude to text at the table while I ate lunch even though I never make conversation lol. Every night he's watching tv in the room next to my bedroom and when I go to sleep he asks if he should mute it for me every damn time I go to bed even though I always say no. He's way more polite than the LSE I know so it couldn't just be Fe role. I'm sure it's just him as a person idiosyncratically but since I know a so- called dual now and this is what stands out I figured I'd ask. Maybe its cuz he has an ESI wife who was a grade school teacher and prompted him like he's a 2nd grader, idk.

    What's your experience?

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Nah, he's a wimp. LIE's are incredibly rude assholes.

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    Alonzo's Avatar
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    Generally speaking, the role function is the "break glass in case of emergencies" function that is inherently deprioritized and devalued in favor of the base function; because it's 2D, it's only passively "fed" by norms + experiences. It stands to reason that a LIE socialized within a Gamma (or even Delta) home/greater socio-cultural environment, for example, may receive less "feed back" on their Super Ego (Fe+Si) functions and therefore be disinclined to flex their role function much, if at all, and certainly not with any nuance and sophistication.

    But for a LIE socialized within an Alpha socio-cultural context (like I was), and especially within the confines of opposing, somewhat antagonistic Quadra values, there may be a greater inclination to step on the role function, and neurotically so. Personally speaking, I'm almost hyper vigilant about being discernibly polite and gracious to wait staff and folks providing a service. The caveat is I'm only capable of tapping into my meager role Fe reserve in such a way if I'm relatively healthy, in good spirits and possess lots of energy, otherwise the dry, monotone, snippy, authoritarian standard fare predominates.

    Just remembered that I've touched on this before >

    Moreover, I see the "super ego" block as one's social mask, in my case, ESE (Fe+Si), and for so many early years of my life, Swedish culture pressured me into working that block like a penny whore in Tijuana, all the while feeling (unbeknownst to me until much later) like a complete fraud; traveling the world and living in other countries (especially the LIE friendly NYC) was one of the most liberating and freeing things for my psyche--it allowed me to fully sit in my truth and shed the "neuroses" attached to the Super Ego functions that had become paranoid and unstable af. On the bright side, I probably have a better handle on Fe and Si than most LIEs, but, conversely, that shit did a lot of damage to my self image early on, in that it made me feel defective, which I'd usually react to by literally or figuratively kicking a MFer in the esophagus. Not ideal. Not ideal.

    ...

    Theoretically, the superego block is ill equipped to defend itself, because it's only suited to passively absorb all outside information/feedback/evaluations from society but without the ability to properly distinguish one set of useful data from another, applied contextually (e.g., at times, especially when receiving some sort of "customer service," I neurotically "thank," "excuse" myself, say "please" even when uncalled for, probably because I don't want to look like an uncivilized, ungrateful tool and can't fully hold onto/remember/retain when it's appropriate or not for certain Fe "niceties"); therefore, you're bound to stumble upon a situation where you do something "socially inept" and look like a fucking tool; what's worse is that we are conscious of our shortcomings on this block and know that we must react to save face/be accepted/look socially competent, but the reaction mobilizes the ego block and, as we've already covered, the responses from the ego block are not always acceptable (by society's standards) for the situation at hand, which then prompts further usage of the superego, furthering a cycle of frustration and fumbling inadequacy that most certainly GRATES, over time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alonzo View Post
    socio-cultural
    First person besides me I've seen use this word.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ashlesha View Post
    What's your experience?
    I'm overly polite/courteous with people I've just met or don't know well. As familiarity rises I drop the cordialities, which is my way of implying "we are cool, I am comfortable with you."

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ashlesha View Post
    Maybe its cuz he has an ESI wife who was a grade school teacher and prompted him like he's a 2nd grader, idk.
    That's probably it
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    good thread, it's the same with LSEs tbh, this forum and some sick members create the false stereotype that Te doms are plain rude assholes who don't give a damn about other's feelings because "hey I'm T dom aha you idiot" =bullshit. In the long or even short run they can show some uneasiness in understanding people and their emotional needs, but that's because of a real lack of understanding of the intricate human dynamics, not because of their willingness to put people down with their shit. so on the surface Te doms are among the most charming and polite (Fe role), but if you dig, you might discover it's hard to go beyond that shallow level of niceness

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    Quote Originally Posted by mfckrz View Post
    First person besides me I've seen use this word.

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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mfckrz View Post
    First person besides me I've seen use this word.
    Shirley you jest.
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    Haikus thehotelambush's Avatar
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    The suggestive function can vary a lot. The behavior @Adam Strange mentions is probably more typical but I have met Te leads who are like you said too.

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thehotelambush View Post
    The suggestive function can vary a lot. The behavior @Adam Strange mentions is probably more typical but I have met Te leads who are like you said too.
    I was being sarcastic.

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    mfckrz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    I was being sarcastic.
    Liar

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    I had an epiphany a few months ago and realized 2 people I know are LIEs instead of IEE and LII as I typed them before.

    Both are very good natured people, nicer than they appear.

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    a two horned unicorn renegade Heretic 007's Avatar
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    Usually LIE's mission is to serve as an orbiting object around the earth so it makes sense that they connect with ESE-like Fe while LSE's put on dramatic face of EIE or administration. Since deep down LIE's are subservient to their Se goddesses will they should also be more humble ass kissers while LSE's make sure you don't starve or wither down.

    The first post really reminded me why I see Te/Fi as an integral part of robotics (train dat machine) but continue, please.
    Measuring you right now

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    Uncle Ave's Avatar
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    I can be really courteous with people, like the guy described, I think he is a Harmonizing subtype, like me.

    I say that because I've met LIEs who have completely different behaviors in this regard, and I think DCNH subtype plays a role.

    Upbringing, maturity level, and mental state all play a role too, but that's not what you're asking.


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    stare into me flames's Avatar
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    I’m generally the opposite - get what I want even if it bothers you. But I think being courteous is just part of being a good fucking person, like when you catch yourself being an asshole a lot you do the opposite of what you normally would when you’re interacting with people.
    And I'm what you desire, like a siren in the night



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    FreelancePoliceman's Avatar
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    You know, I have known some very polite LIEs (and ILIs) like the one you mentioned, but I've known others who aren't that way at all -- dismissive, proud, and what-have-you. Assuming I haven't just mistyped one group or the other, I wonder what causes the difference. Subtype variation?

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    a two horned unicorn renegade Heretic 007's Avatar
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    Ni creatives probably give proud impression (especially EIE) as if they already exist somewhere else. Si PoLR.
    xIE's do differ.
    Measuring you right now

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