Does anyone know how to differentiate your Supervior from your Conflictor?
Does anyone know how to differentiate your Supervior from your Conflictor?
You're never good enough for your supervisor.
Your conflictor does the opposite of what you need, expects what you can't provide and you don't even know what that is.
They are not very alike, one have something you also have and the other is completely opposite.
Your supervisor tries to help or assist you in some way since s/he can see your weaknesses. According socionics IR, its an unidirectional conflict where the supervisor see something wrong about their supervisee but the supervisee sees nothing wrong with supervisor and perceives him as good/caring (unless the supervisor is really pushing).This relationship is hard to break and starts easily.
On the other hand, you can feel attracted towards your conflictor since its the quasi of your dual, just to figure out, time after that the relationship is really painful for both. In some way it would be harder to differentiate between conflictor or dual than supervisor and conflictor. This relationship has less chances to start and keep going, its often very obvious for both that the other person has areas where both simply don't match.
Last edited by Faith; 06-05-2019 at 01:33 AM.
For me, conflicting feels kinda more like mutual hatred. Or you both know 'hate is a negative emotion' so you try to be nice to each other but then there are these moments of hatred that leak out naturally. With a few exceptions, people don't like being 'the bad guy' so they usually try to be nice to people they don't get along with, on both sides- to be a better person like God intended, but doing that only goes so far. You're just being polite to each other 'cuz being mean is wrong©' but it ends up feeling hollow with no substance and you both kinda just want your dual to come in and fix things already.
Supervision, can be more frustrating in a sense- as the supervisee often feels like they are naturally inferior to the other person in this objective way that's hard to explain. Not so much an internal sense of unworthiness or lack of self confidence, but more like- this person is strong at what I'm weak at, without covering up the vulnerabilities that I want them too- and it's annoying. And because it does feel factual and objective, it makes it that much more annoying emotionally. This gives off the impression the supervisor is being very 'arrogant' but from their PoV they are only trying to help. The supervisee often gets like more one-sided overly sensitive, and leaves the supervisor bewildered. However, sometimes the supervisor will also get angry/upset at the supervisee- cuz the supervisor feels their advice is objective, purely logical and benevolent. Which it is. Except to other people's PoLRs.
And of course, sometimes your supervisor is just objectively being an asshole on top of them being your supervisor which is just, a double asshole whammy?
Conflictors make each other walk on eggshells almost instantly (how fast depends on age and life experience), in supervision relationships there is often a certain degree of mutual attraction, a lack of sense of danger, and after some time the feeling that it is never good enough.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
One is likely travelling different paths from these two types so the chances of seeing eye-to-eye over the long term would be rather remote, so does it really matter? One's supervisor will seem to have either a familiar approach or view whereas conflict types tend to appear as if they're totally from another world. However, conflict types seem to appear a little more exotic and thus a little more interesting. The relative potential for success between the two relationships would be like splitting hairs, but I put conflict partners ever so slightly ahead because the familiarity that one may see in supervisors will often breed contempt.
a.k.a. I/O
Gullenko classifies supervision medium comfort. Quite potentially true...I would not run away from ESI dominatrix pretty fast and they would not like my analytical mind.
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