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Thread: People raised by family in opposite quadra.

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blackberry View Post
    Did you hate something in particular about your parents that your ex also had/used to do too? Or nothing like that?
    @Blackberry, It was the usual problem and solution.

    I could never get my father’s respect or admiration. My SLI ex was identical to my SLI father, but was an improved version of him in the sense that she actually liked me.

    Similarly, her father was a disapproving LSE engineer who ran his own business, and I am an approving LIE who runs his own business. I am just like her father, but I am an improved version who actually likes her.

    Marrying a parent is a very common thing to do. It enables a person to resolve problems from childhood that could not be easily resolved any other way.


    My ex is also an SLI-Te, I think, while my father is an SLI-0, I believe, so my ex really is an improved version of my father in the sense that she is more like a Mirror than a Supervisor. I should add that divorce didn't mean that my ex and I stopped liking and respecting each other. (She just got me a subscription to the NY Times as a wedding anniversary present, I gave her a ride to the Farmer's Market so she could buy some Begonias.) Divorce did mean that we're never going to live together again, I learned that I no longer need my father's approval, and I discovered Duals.

    If she hadn't moved out, I'd still be married to her, living a life that was OK but not great. Her moving out started a cascade of events which broke irrevocably with the past. I don't think we need each other anymore. But that doesn't mean we can't be friends and be nice to each other. We're a lot healthier now, I think. At lease, I feel that I am. I can't speak for her.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 05-05-2019 at 11:43 AM.

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