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Thread: Cooperation in duality

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    I'm not hungry mommy bear BrainlessSquid's Avatar
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    Post Cooperation in duality

    What's your experience in cooperation with your dual? Can duals work on the same thing or do they have to distribute work?
    I had to do a work in pairs, and I chose a dual friend, thinking that it would be easier. But we spent almost all the time discussing about what should be done and not doing anything at all, so we were the last to finish the work, and it turn out to be poorer compared to the other pairs.
    Last edited by BrainlessSquid; 04-30-2019 at 01:18 AM.

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Megatrop View Post
    What's your experience in cooperation with your dual? Can duals work at the same thing or do they have to distribute work?
    I had to do a work in pairs, and I chose a dual friend, thinking that it would be easier. But we spent almost all the time discussing about what should be done and not doing anything at all, so we were the last to finish the work, and it turn out to be poorer compared to other people.
    This sounds more like Semi-duality or Mirage than Duality. I click with both Mirage and Semi-duals, and we can make plans, but we can't cooperate the way duals can.

    I was working on this art project with an Artist Dual, and we needed some styrofoam. She knew where we could find a sheet of it and led the way, I cleared junk off the top of the sheet, and we both wordlessly picked it up and headed back to the room and in that moment, I fell in love.
    Without a spoken word, we both picked up the other's intentions and seamlessly worked towards the same goal. This might seem like a lot to infer from moving a piece of styrofoam, but I know what I know.

    However, the work we do together has to be complementarily split. I commissioned the work and paid for all work and resources and I came up with innovative methods of execution, but she was the artistic director and actually did the physical work. We did several projects together, and when I tried to make artistic contributions, the end result was inferior to her vision alone. Similarly, when she did a work alone, it was beautiful and well-done but lacked innovation or surprise on new fronts.*

    So, I initiated the project, she produced the vision and the work, and I supported her vision with innovative techniques and monetary resources. This is an ESI-LIE duality, though, and your mileage will vary.

    *I am an e8 and she is a counter-phobic e6 and we both have trust issues. It took me a long time to trust her vision where ever it went, and I think it took her a long time to trust the fact that my innovations were going to work out. In the end, she liked them enough to look into patenting them.

    If you are an IEI and thus your dual is an SLE, then the two of you are also going to have issues trusting each other. The SLE needs to understand that they can initiate, but they have to listen to your vision and execute it. Maybe the way they execute it belongs to them, but the vision needs to be yours. The only way this will happen is if you work on projects together and they see how they turn out.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 04-28-2019 at 05:43 PM.

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    Hot Scalding Gayser's Avatar
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    Duality is oven romantically good, but business-wise not so much. There are many better pairs for that. Activity, mirror or identical would all be much better for what you are talking about.

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    f.k.a Oprah sbbds's Avatar
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    Maybe you guys didn’t think it was important? I’ve seen dual friends goofing off in classes... I mean if you don’t truly put your minds to it then yeah what do you expect. It’s not a magic pill that guarantees success with zero effort.

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    We distribute work on our base functions

    My husband does the day to day practical stuff like laundry, helping me to relax by taking over the care of baby, by helping me make decisions on what to do that saves me from having to go into states of confusion and scattered/distracted.

    I help my husband by listening to his plans/concerns about work and helping direct his energy towards those activities that matter the most/are of most importance. I provide moral support-which is just listening without criticism, but I subtly agree with him on certain aspects of his frustrations which calms him down.

    When we work at the same thing we get the job done efficiently. He has often said how easy it is to work with me and how good of a team we are.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    I'm not hungry mommy bear BrainlessSquid's Avatar
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    I have come to realize that actually, the person I thought was my dual happens to be an activator. I've read that activators cannot cooperate, unlike duality.

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    Not significant experience.
    Duals can cooperate good as anyone. More efficiency will be when they do related to their strong regions, what is evidently.
    Duals support and study you good in your weak regions.

    Cooperation, when duals are given the same task to do it together - should be a good way to understand the duality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Megatrop View Post
    I have come to realize that actually, the person I thought was my dual happens to be an activator. I've read that activators cannot cooperate, unlike duality.
    good IR is important for friendship, irrational sympathy but not for surface and limited cooperation
    people of any IR can cooperate good if have skills in what they do and follow general rules of communications. they can be irrationally not so pleasant, but to do the work ok anyway

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    Rebelondeck's Avatar
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    Duals are the least likely to poop in each others pasture while having and striving for common goals. They're more complementary than cooperative because when they're forced on exactly the same task, they'll likely have much different ways of seeing and doing things - hence, potential for getting the wires crossed. One partner seems to like aspects of life that the other partner doesn't so duals tend to be cooperative by not wanting to be involved with the same aspects - by default. However, all relationships among mature types are capable of cooperation. Note that a key factor in dual relationships is when under stress and one partner loses it, the other seems to inherently sense the turmoil and offer moral support........

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebelondeck View Post
    Duals are the least likely to poop in each others pasture while having and striving for common goals. They're more complementary than cooperative because when they're forced on exactly the same task, they'll likely have much different ways of seeing and doing things - hence, potential for getting the wires crossed. One partner seems to like aspects of life that the other partner doesn't so duals tend to be cooperative by not wanting to be involved with the same aspects - by default. However, all relationships among mature types are capable of cooperation. Note that a key factor in dual relationships is when under stress and one partner loses it, the other seems to inherently sense the turmoil and offer moral support........

    a.k.a. I/O
    @Rebelondeck, sometimes you just seem to nail it.

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    Moderator xerx's Avatar
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    Who said anything about work. We'd just end up playing video games or having sex.

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