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Thread: ESI/ISFj feeling sick or depressed

  1. #1
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Default ESI/ISFj feeling sick or depressed

    If you want to get to know EII read this, but what concerns me the most right now is this:


    You know my ESI aunt had a stroke and she's been isolating herself in her home all day. I purchased concert tickets for her and my mom and she went but there aren't enough concerts out there to get her to go out and be happy again.

    "ESI does not "tease" LIE with suicide, because he realizes that this is an illegal tactic which should be not be used even in extreme cases. Even when LIE's activities and business ventures lead to ESI's complete ruination - even in such cases he does not opt out to "leave life". Most that ESI allows himself is to "disconnect" or "fall out" of life for some period of time, cut all communication and spend time along in seclusion in order to restore his strengths and later regain all that he's lost."

    https://www.the16types.info/vbulleti...Stratiyevskaya
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    So my EII aunt came over to see me today and this is what she said to me

    "M I don't LOVE how the woman next door handles baby. My heart hurts every time I see her hold her in a rough way. I want to tell her something but I don't know if it's my place."

    I told her
    "you're my aunt; you have every right to tell people what you feel like telling them. You come first. If you need to tell her to be more gentle please do so. I have even asked mom to tell her as well."
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    So this is an Se tactical maneuver that my ESI aunt uses with my mother. I have been more perceptive since i've typed her.

    My mother went shopping and purchased a mustard color top/shirt. I told her I thought it was lovely. She downgrades it by saying "something to wear around the house." I tell her it's beautiful.

    My aunt says "that's what you do now huh? you go shopping when you can!" in this accusatory tone
    My mom says "no we just went for a walk and I saw this store so we went in" deflecting accusations
    My mom continues "you buy expensive shirts and I but it for cheap."
    My aunt says "expensive? I have tops that cost $20 $28; that's expensive?"

    This Gamma accusatory tone goes on between them like a tennis match all day. I just watch them speak usually and don't say anything.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  4. #4
    Alomoes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beautiful sky View Post
    If you want to get to know EII read this, but what concerns me the most right now is this:


    You know my ESI aunt had a stroke and she's been isolating herself in her home all day. I purchased concert tickets for her and my mom and she went but there aren't enough concerts out there to get her to go out and be happy again.

    "ESI does not "tease" LIE with suicide, because he realizes that this is an illegal tactic which should be not be used even in extreme cases. Even when LIE's activities and business ventures lead to ESI's complete ruination - even in such cases he does not opt out to "leave life". Most that ESI allows himself is to "disconnect" or "fall out" of life for some period of time, cut all communication and spend time along in seclusion in order to restore his strengths and later regain all that he's lost."

    https://www.the16types.info/vbulleti...Stratiyevskaya
    If someone had a stroke just be careful, remain calm, and read this.

    https://www.pritikin.com/had-a-stroke

    Then do it. Fun part is doing it when you're depressed because you had a stroke. Spoilers, it's generic health stuff. Excercise, not smoking, eating right, so on and so forth.

    Lastly, that's actually fine for what you're dealing with, sometimes you need to put the foot down and force people to do certain things or else the world ends.

    But yeah. If person needs time give time. Some people need to yell into the pillow for a while. Just make sure they do that meanwhile or after. Though you're right that you'd need to be tactful about it.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phrenology

    An optimist - does not get discouraged under any circumstances. Life upheavals and stressful events only toughen him and make more confident. He likes to laugh and entertain people. Enters contact with someone by involving him with a humorous remark. His humor is often sly and contain hints and double meanings. Easily enters into arguments and bets, especially if he is challenged. When arguing his points is often ironic, ridicules the views of his opponent. His irritability and hot temper may be unpleasant to others. However, he himself is not perceptive of this and believes that he is simply exchanging opinions.

    http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=LIE_Profile_by_Gulenko

  5. #5
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alomoes View Post
    If someone had a stroke just be careful, remain calm, and read this.

    https://www.pritikin.com/had-a-stroke

    Then do it. Fun part is doing it when you're depressed because you had a stroke. Spoilers, it's generic health stuff. Excercise, not smoking, eating right, so on and so forth.

    Lastly, that's actually fine for what you're dealing with, sometimes you need to put the foot down and force people to do certain things or else the world ends.

    But yeah. If person needs time give time. Some people need to yell into the pillow for a while. Just make sure they do that meanwhile or after. Though you're right that you'd need to be tactful about it.
    Thank you so much Alomoes for being so kind and helpful
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  6. #6
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Today is my ESi cousin’s 50 th birthday and we are doing a big surprise party for her. She’s married to an SEE. They have a guest couple at the party and they are an LIE and SEE couple. The LIE made a toast speech that was very Fi and very warm. If I can recall word for word he said “H, may you live long and always have love and kindness around you. Your family, may they always be by your side. Congratulations “

    Wow
    Beautiful
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  7. #7
    Alomoes's Avatar
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    Neat. Glad I'm helpful.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phrenology

    An optimist - does not get discouraged under any circumstances. Life upheavals and stressful events only toughen him and make more confident. He likes to laugh and entertain people. Enters contact with someone by involving him with a humorous remark. His humor is often sly and contain hints and double meanings. Easily enters into arguments and bets, especially if he is challenged. When arguing his points is often ironic, ridicules the views of his opponent. His irritability and hot temper may be unpleasant to others. However, he himself is not perceptive of this and believes that he is simply exchanging opinions.

    http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=LIE_Profile_by_Gulenko

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