Okay, one more thread then I'm done I pwomise. A lot has changed and I'm not depressed anymore.
What do you study or do for a living? How did you come to do that? What do you like or dislike about it?
I have worked in fast food for a long time. I dropped out of high school and got my GED as soon as I was legally able, did some college, never finished. Just quit my fast food jobs and would like to get my bartender’s license.
What are your values, and why?
Be a pleasant person, pretty please. Don’t harm others, otherwise, do what you wish.
What else do you do on a daily basis? What are your interests and hobbies? Why do you do them?
Chill, drink, write, hang out.
Describe your relations with family and friends. What do you like and dislike about them?
I have good relationships with all my immediate family. I used to have problems with my mom and stepdad, but no longer. They’re very in your face, kinda insensitive people and easily overpower me. I think they’re SEE and SLE.
My sister and I get along really well. She’s SEI. We share a lot of music and memes and have lots of fun together. But she’s kinda selfish. Her husband is IEI and he is a chore. Really self-absorbed. He’s like a prickly cat.
My dad and stepmom I believe are SLI and SEI. I respect them both a lot. My dad is very smart and respectable. Stepmom too. She’s a bit of a gossip but I like that. Also very thoughtful. My stepsister I think is ESE. She’s sweet but totally unreliable and a big ol phony.
I have actually managed to stay very good friends with several people from high school. Particularly an ESI and an EII. They’re both real weird but nice and I love them. Everything about them. The only problem I might have with them is they’re both a bit sensitive.
What do you look for in friends? In romantic relationships?
I like weird and receptive people.
What conflicts have you encountered recently with other people? Why did they happen? Which kinds seem to happen on a regular basis?
I was sharing a room with this dude who kept mooching off me and swearing he’d pay me back then he’d get mad any time I’d bring it up like I’m trying to guilt trip him. One time he refused to give me a cigarette even though I’ve given him a thousand and I got super pissed and tried to take it from him and it all gets a little fuzzy from there.
In the past I’ve argued a lot about semantics and politics and morality. Usually just for the hell of it.
How would your friends describe you?
Naive, weird, irresponsible yet dedicated, smarter than I look, witty, silly, fun loving, imaginative, generous, messy, lovable, distractible, argumentative, careless, in some ways principled, in my own world, unconcerned.
What do people generally see as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
I usually don’t dwell on negativity. I’m generous, not materialistic. I’ll talk about anything. Open minded. Adaptable/flexible. Chill.
What are your weaknesses? What criticism do you often face from others? What do you dislike about yourself?
Careless, thoughtless. I never remember events or plan ahead enough to bother with gifts, although I would love to be the sort of person who did. Lackadaisical in most areas of my life. Messy. Inattentive. Goofy at the wrong times. Airheaded. Horrible with money. Self absorbed. Can be kind of mean without intending to. I try my best not to but I can be critical. With close relations I can be very competitive and argumentative and a sore loser. If you didn’t know me well you’d probably never guess this as I cultivate a very chill image. And people I don’t know as well probably think I’m the nicest person in the world and a doormat, so keep that in mind as well. But I don’t think I’m really as nice as I seem even though I like to think of myself as super nice. But then I think about what old friends/close family would say about me and it’s hard to ignore the fact that I’ve not been the nicest person in the past. Something I feel horrible about and try to work on every day. I wasn’t evil or anything but I used to enjoy talking shit and I was kind of entitled and thoughtless and would take advantage of people who would allow it. And not always faithful in relationships.
In what areas of life can you manage well on your own? In what areas of your life would you like help?
I’ve always managed to keep a job and take care of myself if necessary.
But I’m not that independent. I was just single for over a year and quickly spiraled downward. I’m not a very practical person. My credit score went down like 300 points since being single.
What things do you find to be a chore? What things do you enjoy more than others?
I hate dealing with red-tape and bureaucracy. Still haven’t done my taxes. I have a million tiny things I’m putting off. I get overwhelmed by the number of things I should be doing so I don’t do any of them without being harrassed. I never answer unknown phone numbers or check my email.
I enjoy having fun and learning interesting stuff. I don’t mind cleaning if I can play my music really loud and sing when no one is around. Or just let my mind wander.
What goals, aspirations, or plans do you have for the future? How did you come to have them?
My goals constantly change. Right now I need to file for bankruptcy probably and get out of debt. I’d like to become a bartender. And someday write a novel.
What traits do you find endearing that others might dislike? What traits are considered positive/neutral by others but tend to annoy you?
I like most people. I don’t really like overly confident people though. I really like weird folks, especially if the weirdness is kinda hidden beneath the surface just waiting to be revealed by a nosy person such as myself.
What kinds of things do you do to manage and/or beautify your environment(your room, your house, etc.)? What do you think of daily chores?
I’m very unconcerned with decor. I wouldn’t even think to hang anything up on the wall. I hate stuff that is purely decorative.
I used to be a huge slob but I’m trying to work on this.
How do you behave around strangers?
I’m very shy around strangers. I hate unnecessary contact with people I have no reason to interact with. But I can be extremely outgoing once I get to know someone. And if I’m feeling confident I can be friendly. My confidence comes and goes.
How do you react to conflict? What do you do if somebody insults or attacks you?
I usually don’t back down from an argument. But I usually won’t engage people I don’t know well. I am mostly not too sensitive to insults, or at least I pretend not to be. If someone wants to legitimately be rude though I may be thrown off. I try my best to be nice to everyone and I’m usually not prepared for an attack. Depending on my confidence, I will either totally submit, totally overreact, or respond with levity.
What is one common misconception that people have? Explain why it is wrong.
I really can’t think of an example for this question so I will half-ass it by saying that fish cannot live happily in a bowl. I keep fish and it is horrifying to see the conditions people keep their fish in. Not just keeping them in bowls, though that is a big one. Even betta fish should have at least five gallons. Just because they can survive in a vase by themselves doesn’t mean they should have to. And by the way they don’t have to be kept alone. Even the males can usually do fine with other fish as long as they aren’t other male bettas or other fish with similar long, flowing fins. A betta in a 20-30g community aquarium with fast moving fish will be very happy and hopefully peaceful.
And I don’t want to go into aquarium setup and water cycling right now, but if you’re going to set up an aquarium, do some research first and be patient. There is a reason your fish keep dying.
What did you do last Friday?
What is your biggest accomplishment?
I paid off a credit card once. Three more to go.
What is something you regret?
Staying with my ex-fiancee for so long. I’m glad we were together but we should’ve broken up a long time ago. We’re both much happier now.
Who do you admire, and why?
My last boss was a really great boss. He somehow commanded respect without being really forceful. Everyone always felt like they could talk to him.
What's been on your mind? Has anything been worrying or concerning you? What problems have you encountered lately?
I’ve actually been feeling pretty darn good. No worries as long as I ignore my financial issues, which I’m pretty great at.
What are your religious or spiritual beliefs and why do you hold them?
I was raised mormon. I’ve been sure I’m going to (mormon) hell since I was about seven years old. I have a weird relationship with morality and religion, probably partly to do with my upbringing. If you don’t know much about Mormonism lets just say I was taught to harshly judge people who drank coffee and women who showed their shoulders in public. Or have multiple earrings.
Now I have no beliefs at all but every couple of years I have an existential crisis and attempt to become religious. Doesn’t last long. I’m not capable of tricking myself. I consider myself agnostic because I think atheism is just as stupid as religion. It’s pretty fucking ballsy to claim you know anything about the afterlife or how we came to be.
What are your political beliefs, and why? To what extent do you care about politics?
I’m just to the left of moderate politically. I used to be really into politics but I’m kind of disgusted by the way people talk about this stuff these days. Everyone thinks they’re an expert and I cringe at the extremists of both sides. I will literally go out of my way to not have to overhear people in their early twenties discuss politics. I once dropped out of an American Government class after the first day because I just could not handle all the discussion. I wished they would just listen to the professor instead of acting like they knew anything.
Would you ever be interested in starting a business? Why or why not? What role would you play in it? What kind of business would it be?
Naw. I don’t have the self discipline and I don’t care enough about money. Plus most businesses fail and it doesn’t seem worth it. If I did start a business it would probably be a restaurant or a bar, the worst investment of them all lol. Or maybe buy a Taco Bell.
What kind of work environment do you prefer? What do you look for in a job?
I have always wanted to be a bartender. I enjoy fun, fast paced environments and I’m good at multitasking. But at the same time I enjoy mindless jobs where you have a lot of alone time.
What is or was your favorite school subject and why?
Language and soft sciences I am great at. I’m also pretty good at chemistry and biology, but horrible at physics and math. And I find them very boring. I was also in band and always stayed in the top three chairs despite rarely practicing or showing up to sectionals. I’m pretty musically inclined. I’m horrible at any sort of visual art though, particularly 3d stuff like sculpture. I hated gym at the time because I was an awkward kid and I didn’t like being on display. It was weird. And I especially hated running and still hate running. But I do enjoy some sports now. Playing, not watching. Fuck that.
How do you approach responsibility? What do you tend to expect of others?
I always show up to work and try to do what I say I’m going to do. I expect the same of others. I’m not a very responsible person though, overall.
Where did you go on your most recent vacation? What did you do there? How did you like it and why?
My last vacation I did nothing and it was awful. I had planned on going to Colorado with my fiancee at the time but we broke up a couple of weeks before my vacation came up so I stayed home and was bored within about two days. I planned on getting a lot of chores done and maybe working on some of my hobbies but I mostly slept and watched TV. I didn’t see a single person the whole week and I very much regret even taking that vacation. I can’t even remember the last time I travelled. It was probably to London like three years ago. I hated London TBH. Maybe just because I was only there for a week and I was jet lagged the whole time. The only thing I enjoyed about London was the museums and the pubs, but those are things you can find anywhere. We did also go to Scotland (around Loch Ness) on a bus tour with a lot of old people. Scotland was great. I much prefer trips to scenic natural places than to big cities. All cities are pretty much the same to me. Pointless unless you want to go shopping.
What were you like as a kid? How have you changed since you were a child?
I got in trouble a lot without actually being disruptive. I was silently rebellious. I’d always be reading or working on my own little projects while I was supposed to be listening. I straight up refused to do homework or study, especially math. The only thing I always did was assigned reading. I actually enjoyed most assigned books. Animal Farm is the only one that suuuucked.
I was awkward and weird and had a few really close friends but wasn’t exactly universally liked. I could be a suck-up in some situations oddly since I was generally not thrilled with authority. I was always very polite to my teachers and it bothered me that they still didn’t seem to like me just because I refused to do any work lol.
I was mostly dreamy with my head in the clouds, but I also really enjoyed riding bikes and climbing trees.
I’m pretty much the same now really, but I haven’t ridden a bike in a while.
What was your high school experience like?
I didn’t last long but I enjoyed the social aspect of highschool before I got kicked out of my school of choice for bad grades. I was in the Center for International Studies program so I spent two hours a day in Japanese class and one hour in geopolitics. My CIS classes and Marching band were the only classes I participated in at all. I made lifelong friends in those classes. We were like family. (The CIS classes, not band. I was too weird even for the band kids)
I was much more outgoing in high school than in elementary and middle school, probably because I did have that close knit group of friends that I was comfortable around. I was actually quite obnoxious back then and probably a bit of an asshole. I was very popular in my own social circle, but we were not exactly a popular social circle lol.
Talk about a significant event from your life.
I really can’t think of anything. Closest I can come up with is experiences I’ve had while on hallucinogens. Actually my last and worst mushroom trip was probably my most significant experience. And I’d rather not talk about it. It was pretty traumatic.
Do you like kids? Why or why not?
I like well-behaved kids. I’ve always thought I wanted kids but lately I’m not so sure. Even my dog annoys me sometimes, I can’t even imagine what having children would be like. But I am pretty good with kids. I think I would be an awesome uncle. I would be horrible at discipline, but probably pretty fun on weekends.
If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
This is kind of a boring question and if I answered it it would be very long. But in short, I would not let them play dangerous sports like gymnastics or football and I’d not want them to be spoiled or entitled.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
I just got out of one. It was awful. I’d been stuck in the same job for like a decade. Kept quitting and crawling back. Got out of a LTR that was going nowhere. Never did anything or left the house. I was depressed, turns out.
How do you see other people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
Anyway. I think people are mostly good. But there are a lot of bad people out there as well and you should be aware of that. The people that are bad are mostly products of their environment/upbringing/genetics/brain chemistry.
There are a lot of social problems and I will hurt my head thinking about it right now.
What do you do if you're not getting what you want? What approach do you use?
I really don’t want that much so I am rarely disappointed. If I want something (usually a purchase) I will just get it without telling anyone because I know they will judge me and say there are better things to be spending my money on blah blah blah. If something is very difficult to get I usually just give up on wanting it.
Are you comfortable taking leadership roles? In what areas? Why or why not?
I am a pretty horrible leader. I care too much about being cool to be effective.
How often do you get angry? What kinds of things make you angry?
I repress my anger then explode inappropriately, usually after getting taken advantage of for a long time.
What is the best thing that happened to you during the past week?
Everything has been great this past week.
What is the worst thing that happened to you during the past week?
Well I realized my car is unrepairable I guess but oh well.
What is the purpose of life? What do you find personally meaningful in life?
My purpose in life is to find my purpose in life.
What is the most interesting place you have been, and why?
Scotland I think. Beautiful lakes and mountains.
How do you dress or manage your appearance?
I either dress really casually or really well depending on my mood.
Do you like surprises?
I love them.
Is there anything else important about you that we should know?
I kinda half-assed this questionnaire because I’m tired of filling them out and a lot of it I kept from the last one.