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At first I thought I was SO blind, but then I realized I actually pay a lot of attention to SO, even though sometimes I resent social stuff. I like to know ‘what’s going on in the world’, the latest trends, what other people are doing. Where I fit in, if I fit in, and I feel kind of blinded if I don’t know. I think a lot of it is the way I was raised. I think my mom shoved it down my throat. It’s very likely she’s SO first. She made me very insecure when I was younger focusing on popularity, and at the same time telling me it didn’t really matter. I like to tell myself I don’t care what other people think, but I think secretly I do, but sometimes I will do or say things a little too honest to kind of shock, or even secretly mock them, because I think it’s hilarious. So there is some push and pull there with my social instinct. I feel like mainly I’m an observer.
My main focus seems to be SP, as I mentioned earlier in the thread. I guess most would say I’m pretty grounded and practical minded.
As for sx, I was never much interested in having a relationship when I was younger. A lot of my friends had boyfriends (a lot), but I was not interested in having a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere. I had a hard time finding people I was attracted to, and am very picky. I’m also kind of a prude and not much of a sexual person. I am also not the type of person to get a divorce. I’m a bit old fashioned, you could say. My husband is my HS boyfriend and I took our relationship very seriously from the beginning. I have my family and they are like my tribe, and very important to me. Of course my husband is my favorite person and we know each other very well, and have been through a lot together. If I lost him I think it would kill me. He’s basically my rock & best friend. And he’s also very much like me in some ways. We have a very similar approach to relationships, values, and goals, where I think it really counts. But as far as intensity, passion. I’m not into those things. They actually make me feel kind of awkward. I’ve always felt really out of touch with my own sexuality, and don’t even like the term sexuality to be honesty. This whole subject is very awkward for me and and I don’t talk about it or like hearing others talk about. I feel very awkward about a lot of these things and probably seem pretty ‘repressed’. I’ve heard that one a lot.




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