Quote Originally Posted by Anonymous View Post
Yeah, well, it depends on the way "significance" is stated. I associate an overt desire to be "unique" and to be "significant" with type 3 influence. I just cannot see that in myself...

5 being a head type, with it brings an unconscious feeling of being irredeemably and horribly broken inside, but not necessarily a conscious urge to be "unique, significant and compete." I don't care about those things. It's just...again not something I am and not something I ever have been...


Being unique and noteworthy by playing on society's terms and "competing" and coming out the best again in the eyes of the status quo - that's 3.

4s don't care, imo. Of course, 4 with 3 influence can be like that.

Threes can very much care about being unique just in the way you described, but like I said, they want to be, but they don't necessarily already feel unique in the sense of being the "ugly duckling"! That's 4. Everything else...well I can see that as other types as well, including 3.

4s are already nothing like anyone else, why bother competing? I am not agreeing or disagreeing with that haha, just trying to provide I guess what they might be thinking.
Okay I won't respond to most of this because you said you didn't want to debate and I don't particularly either but this bit I think is us using different language for the same thing.

"Being unique and noteworthy by playing on society's terms" - you added this bit, I never mentioned playing on society's terms and that is indeed threeish. I said in the eye's of the partner. There's nothing that I said that suggests wanting prestige (though I think 4w3 could want that) but it's just not being normal. This could also be negative, like I mentioned above, in that it could be "I am the MOST ugly duckling", "I suffer more than other people", "I'm not like other people", all of which is the core of 4 and all of which are the four seeking to be noteworthy because that's a way of dealing with that pain. Calling yourself an ugly duckling is calling yourself significant in a negative way because it's still distinguishing yourself from the norm.

Also it's interesting you said what I said was just normal behaviour, because to me 'ugly duckling' syndrome is just normal behaviour and it's the envy, spite, self-absorption and range of emotions (including anger) that make four different. Mb we just have very different interpretations of the type