I guess I will elaborate on what I think of SX combined with 4...
I am honestly quite sick and tired of the stereotypes roaming around. Not aimed at anyone specific! You guys have provided good information for andreasdevig to reflect on, but I feel the urge to provide my own perspective since I see this somewhat differently.
I don't think all SX 4s are automatically entitled, narcissistic, and spiteful. Specially combined with an Fi base...it just doesn't make any sense. I consider EII, for instance, to tend towards modesty. Perhaps a 5 wing could contribute to being attracted to human, authentic, raw things, instead of something mostly based on image (which is central to 4 anyway, even with 5 wing, but the narcissistic aspect of it is probably highlighted with 3 wing, and possibly the other qualities that neither I not andreasdevig relates to).
Here are the things I don't relate to (and perhaps several other SX 4s don't either):
- entitlement
- narcissism
- spitefulness in the way it is described
- lack of empathy basically
- anger
- aggression (hostile or violent behavior or attitudes toward another; readiness to attack or confront).
(People might disagree on the last one for me but I have not been myself on this forum due to previous recent trauma with abuse and bullying. I wouldn't say I attack people at all most of the time, except the rare instances. Otherwise I mostly just want peace).
- malicious
- wanting to be superior
- being "consciously aware" of their anger
- "demanding what is rightfully theirs"
- "They want to be special and significant in the eyes of their partner"
(mostly issue with significant in the last one, that sounds very 3._
Actually, I should copy paste what 3 is, because a lot of what is attributed to 4, reminds me of type 3. Hence why I cannot relate to it because type 3 is heavily in my shadow, it has basically nothing to do with my personality.
- to want to be significant in their partner's eyesTHE ACHIEVER
Enneagram Type Three
The Success-Oriented, Pragmatic Type:
Adaptable, Excelling, Driven, and Image-Conscious
- wants to be superior, aka compete.Basic Fear: Of being worthless
- narcissism. though not limited to any specific type.
For 3 competition arises from...basically anything. To me that is the ocean they swim in. They have to 'excel' no matter what. I would think with SX added to that, they would indeed want to be 'the best' so to speak. That sounds very 3, and I am inclined to attribute it to 4w3s and 3s and in general.Basic Desire: To feel valuable and worthwhile
I am not a very competitive person. I rather give up before I even try.
This might be 8 and/or 8 influence:
entitlement
- narcissism
- spitefulness in the way it is described
- lack of empathy basically
- anger
- aggression (hostile or violent behavior or attitudes toward another; readiness to attack or confront).
- malicious
- being "consciously aware" of their anger
- "demanding what is rightfully theirs"
actually, almost all of it can be very 8. Which would explain why 9 fixed 4s don't relate to it.
As for your "core" type, I believe all types go down to your core, but to simplify it, whatever is at the heart of things that are bothering you consciously and unconsciously and affecting your behavior most so in the present and in the past, would be your "core" type in the enneagram.
I am very shy, modest, nice, peaceful albeit - intense at times, emotional, i can indeed "bite" so to speak when hurt, but that anger isn't there because im entitled, it's there because i think I feel that im ugly and repulsive to the core (im not actually but, that's how it feels at times). It's not hatred because of some entitlement, it's hatred because i hate myself and all i can see in the other person's eyes is the same thing. I could go deeper into it and but needless to say im not comfortable with the predominant image of a SX 4 being forced onto me or super-imposed onto me. I don't really want to argue or be attacked about this, unless you wanted to do it non-aggressively.
Type 4: "there's something horribly wrong with me, I am ugly inside" + SX: my meaning in everything, sense of self, self worth, and very life essence itself seems to be tied to the 'special other half': There's something horribly ugly at my core, but I must find someone who will love me regardless.
None of that, in my opinion, necessitates vengeance, lack of empathy, entitlement, spitefulness etc. etc.
But then I probably look at those things differently than others do.


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