Going off of a suggestion by @ouronis, I'm going to explain why I relate to all 9 types about equally. I've decided to put it in it's own thread, since it takes up so much space to go into all of them in detail. If anybody else relates, then please feel free to explain your own experiences! I think the Enneagram is something that captures a lot of the most basic, universal human motives that we all (or nearly all) share. I’m wondering if it might be pretty common for others to feel equally balanced between the types.
If anybody disagrees and thinks I'm most likely one type, I'd be curious to hear why as well. I'm going off the descriptions from here: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-descriptions
I am not organized and orderly. Mostly I am spontaneous, living on impulses. However, I've been criticized for being too perfectionistic, for not being able to see the the positive side. I tend towards being impatient. I do feel a drive to change the world for the better. I have a vision of the world being more beautiful, more free, more wealthy, more humane, more honest and trustworthy, etc--and I want to contribute to this ideal, even influencing others in that direction when appropriate. Most people probably have a similar desire. However, this desire is not one I'm regularly focused on. I think I'd feel overwhelmed and drained if it was. It's more like something I check on from time to time, to see if the way I'm living is in alignment with those higher ideals.They are teachers, crusaders, and advocates for change: always striving to improve things, but afraid of making a mistake. Well-organized, orderly, and fastidious, they try to maintain high standards, but can slip into being critical and perfectionistic. They typically have problems with resentment and impatience... ... Ones resist being affected by their instinctual drives, consciously not giving in to them or expressing them too freely. The result is a personality type that has problems with repression, resistance
Lastly about E1; this description reminds me a lot of how I experience Te (my POLR). I'm nervous about having my factual understanding proved wrong, and having my work efficiency criticized, so I try really hard not to make mistakes in this area (at least in front of other people).
E2:Want to be right, to strive higher and improve everything, to be consistent with their ideals, to justify themselves, to be beyond criticism so as not to be condemned by anyone.
I hardly ever have problems with neglecting my own needs in favor of helping others. I don't think I even enjoy feeling needed. I don't want to have children, because I dislike the idea of having to take care of someone who's 100% dependent on me for everything 24/7. I'm hesitant to get pets for this reason, (even though I enjoy animals). However...one of my major desires since I was very young was to have a healthy, happy romantic relationship. So I do want to love and be loved, for both of us to take care of each other. Also, I do want to be generally well-liked by friends and family. I do helpful things for people from time to time, and I frequently get complimented on being friendly, warm, and sincere.Twos are empathetic, sincere, and warm-hearted. They are friendly, generous, and self-sacrificing, but can also be sentimental, flattering, and people-pleasing. They are well-meaning and driven to be close to others, but can slip into doing things for others in order to be needed. They typically have problems with possessiveness and with acknowledging their own needs... ...Key Motivations: Want to be loved, to express their feelings for others, to be needed and appreciated
Though overall, this is probably the type I feel the least affinity with.
Threes are self-assured, attractive, and charming. Ambitious, competent, and energetic, they can also be status-conscious and highly driven for advancement. They are diplomatic and poised, but can also be overly concerned with their image and what others think of them. They typically have problems with workaholism and competitiveness...
- Basic Fear: Of being worthless
- Basic Desire: To feel valuable and worthwhile
...Want to be affirmed, to distinguish themselves from others, to have attention, to be admired, and to impress others.
Well let's see, I wish I was self-assured, attractive, charming, ambitious, competent, and energetic, but I doubt I am, and I hardly ever get complimented on those things xD The concept of being high-social-status does not sound very motivating, for it's own sake. I do not have problems with workaholism whatsoever. If anything, I think I'm too lazy. But then again, I do fear being worthless to a romantic partner, a lot. I like to make artistic projects and then put them out there for the world to see, so anybody who likes my art can enjoy it, too. In my mind, that makes my art provide more value, since there's more than one person enjoying it. And it's hopefully making the world more beautiful, which fits under my E1 ideals. I have issues with worrying about what others think of me in social interactions :/ And I can't deny that it makes me feel really, really good to be admired, to impress, or to receive attention from friends.
Fours are self-aware, sensitive, and reserved. They are emotionally honest, creative, and personal, but can also be moody and self-conscious. Withholding themselves from others due to feeling vulnerable and defective, they can also feel disdainful and exempt from ordinary ways of living. They typically have problems with melancholy, self-indulgence, and self-pity.
- Basic Fear: That they have no identity or personal significance
- Basic Desire: To find themselves and their significance (to create an
Key Motivations: Want to express themselves and their individuality, to create and surround themselves with beauty, to maintain certain moods and feelings, to withdraw to protect their self-image, to take care of emotional needs before attending to anything else, to attract a "rescuer."
I'm pretty sure this used to be my type, but I'm not sure if it is nowadays. Yes I really do want to create and surround myself with beauty, to maintain certain moods and feelings, and to express my individuality. These are main goals in my life. I still am sensitive, emotionally honest, creative, moody, and self-conscious. I've read that this type gets created when a child with an active personality (dominant, expressive, assertive) gets met with a somewhat distant parenting style, which causes the child to feel invalidated and insignificant. This was spot on, for me.
Then I was lucky enough to make friends who persistently validated my sense of identity, that I was 'unique' and 'special' in my own way, and I grew to feel confident about this. Now I have a solid sense of self, knowing that there's no one else quite like me, but I'm still more like other people than I am different from them (which does not bother me in the least). I don't often worry about losing my identity, anymore.
Fives are alert, insightful, and curious. They are able to concentrate and focus on developing complex ideas and skills. Independent, innovative, and inventive, they can also become preoccupied with their thoughts and imaginary constructs. They become detached, yet high-strung and intense. They typically have problems with eccentricity, nihilism, and isolation. At their Best: visionary pioneers, often ahead of their time, and able to see the world in an entirely new way.
- Basic Fear: Being useless, helpless, or incapable
- Basic Desire: To be capable and competent
Key Motivations: Want to possess knowledge, to understand the environment, to have everything figured out as a way of defending the self from threats from the environment.
The main parts I relate to here are the 'key motivations', and the part about being curious. Coming to understand something thoroughly is often satisfying. I do not want to be incapable, either (but who does, really?). I'm prone to isolating, too. However, I wouldn't describe myself as 'independent, innovative, and inventive'.
This could be me:
But I don't feel like learning is this necessary (it's more like a hobby):Behind Fives’ relentless pursuit of knowledge are deep insecurities about their ability to function successfully in the world. Fives feel that they do not have an ability to do things as well as others
Overall I relate to this type, generally, but I don't feel like the need to understand everything is such an enormous motivation in my life.Being a Five means always needing to learn, to take in information about the world. A day without learning is like a day without ‘sunshine.’
The committed, security-oriented type. Sixes are reliable, hard-working, responsible, and trustworthy. Excellent "troubleshooters," they foresee problems and foster cooperation, but can also become defensive, evasive, and anxious—running on stress while complaining about it. They can be cautious and indecisive, but also reactive, defiant and rebellious. They typically have problems with self-doubt and suspicion.
- Basic Fear: Of being without support and guidance
- Basic Desire: To have security and support
Key Motivations: Want to have security, to feel supported by others, to have certitude and reassurance, to test the attitudes of others toward them, to fight against anxiety and insecurity.
The problem with E6 is that they feel generally insecure and stressed out, I guess. I can relate to the concept of being regularly fearful and self-doubting (sadly). I still don't think I make a good troubleshooter. I keep my word (so in that way I'm reliable). I want to feel more secure in my own abilities, but I don't relate much to the idea of seeking security from the outside world. The books, movies, and real-life research topics that most interest me are suspense, horror, and 'taboo' or dark subjects that are impossible to thoroughly understand. I'm attracted to friends and potential dating interests who suprise me with spontaneous, quirky, or simply unpredictable behavior. Maybe this is still possible for 6s? I'm not sure.
Sevens are extroverted, optimistic, versatile, and spontaneous. Playful, high-spirited, and practical, they can also misapply their many talents, becoming over-extended, scattered, and undisciplined. They constantly seek new and exciting experiences, but can become distracted and exhausted by staying on the go. They typically have problems with impatience and impulsiveness.
- Basic Fear: Of being deprived and in pain
- Basic Desire: To be satisfied and content—to have their needs fulfilled
Key Motivations: Want to maintain their freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences, to keep themselves excited and occupied, to avoid and discharge pain.
This is one of my favorite types to spend time with. Who doesn't want new and exciting experiences? To be free and happy? To avoid pain? I know I do ! I'm also pretty scattered, and need to learn better self-discipline. But I'm not more of an extravert than an introvert. I'm not prone to being optimistic, high-spirited, or constantly on the go. Also, by myself I don't seek out novelty as much as I've seen real-life 7s do automatically. I'm pretty content to just lounge at home with my art supplies, making little projects.
Eights are self-confident, strong, and assertive. Protective, resourceful, straight-talking, and decisive, but can also be ego-centric and domineering. Eights feel they must control their environment, especially people, sometimes becoming confrontational and intimidating. Eights typically have problems with their tempers and with allowing themselves to be vulnerable.
- Basic Fear: Of being harmed or controlled by others
- Basic Desire: To protect themselves (to be in control of their own life
Key Motivations: Want to be self-reliant, to prove their strength and resist weakness, to be important in their world, to dominate the environment, and to stay in control of their situation.
Here's a type I think "now I know I can't be that one!" until I get to reading it, and then I go "huh, yeah I have problems with being domineering and ego-centric sometimes - Mm-hm I do not want to let anyone else control me for anything - yeah I can be assertive when I need to be" etc. In some ways, being free to decide my own destiny is the most important thing in life, imo. I dislike religions for this reason, because they all involve some form of submitting to a 'higher power'. I am straight-talking and men especially have commented on this, saying I'm easier to communicate with than most women because I'm just upfront. But, I guess the overall aggressive, competitive, 8-like behavior is far from the norm for me. Normally I try to be accepting and accomodating for others, because I like to live in a harmonious atmosphere. When people have seen me defend myself, they usually expressed a lot of suprise afterwards.
Nines are accepting, trusting, and stable. They are usually creative, optimistic, and supportive, but can also be too willing to go along with others to keep the peace. They want everything to go smoothly and be without conflict, but they can also tend to be complacent, simplifying problems and minimizing anything upsetting. They typically have problems with inertia and stubbornness.
- Basic Fear: Of loss and separation
- Basic Desire: To have inner stability "peace of mind"
Key Motivations: Want to create harmony in their environment, to avoid conflicts and tension, to preserve things as they are, to resist whatever would upset or disturb them.
I almost would label myself this type. It resonates a lot with the main difficulties I am facing lately with overcoming intertia, facing internal conflict, and driving against resistance to become productive. Lately I really fear feeling any sort of internal disharmony, but I'm trying to grow out of this. For instance, I often feel multiple conflicting motivations, and it's impossible to satisfy them all at once, so to cause the least amount of discomfort I will resort to doing nothing But 9s seem to be characterized as avoiding interpersonal conflict, and tending towards being submissive. Whereas I set boundaries without much difficulty. It's only within myself that I can't stand conflict.
what they generally do not have is a sense of really inhabiting themselves—a strong sense of their own identity.Ironically, therefore, the only type the Nine is not like is the Nine itself. Being a separate self, an individual who must assert herself against others, is terrifying to Nines. They would rather melt into someone else or quietly follow their idyllic daydreams.
I do have a sense of my identity, and asserting myself against others is not terrifying.
"I am aware of focusing on other people, wondering what they are like, how and where they live, etc. In a relationship with others, I often give up my own agenda in favor of the other person’s. I have to be on guard about giving in to other’s demands and discounting my own legitimate needs."
Doesn't sound like me at all...
Lastly it says "Nines must remember that the only way out is through..." This idea has been necessary for me, lately.
So to sum up, all of these types feel half relatable, half not. I have each of the motivations (at least a little bit), but none of them stand out as more important than the others (except maybe 9's). Thanks to anybody who has read this, I hope it wasn't too painful or long of a read (I assume only big enneagram enthusiasts would read this). If there's anyone else out there who's not sure about their enneagram type, you can see you're not alone.