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    Default how emotional do you feel you are compared to other people?

    i'm feeling like about a 2 on a scale of 1-10. it's probably a defense against having to feel the low level stew of despair, regret, self-loathing, anxiety, and general malaise that's always there to bubble up punctuated by brief respites of amusement or nostalgia.


    ugh. kinda a bummer way to start the thread but i'll go ahead and hit submit instead of deleting it.

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    While I like to think of myself as a fairly emotional person (because I know what goes on inside my head) I have a very cold and detached demeanor. Truth is whatever I'm feeling is eating me from the inside whether good or bad, and the more intense it is the more terrified I am of expressing it (rejection or ridicule being expected) so I come off as pretty robotic, and people treat me as such lmao, so I suppose I'm not that emotional...
    Even if I have strong feelings chances are they will paralyze me but I won't act on them, at least not constructively; they're not my priority when making decisions.
    Meh...I'd say a 4 on a scale from 1-10
    Last edited by NdFeB08; 12-03-2017 at 04:35 AM. Reason: Typo

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    Quote Originally Posted by NdFeB08 View Post
    While I like to think of myself as a fairly emotional person (because I know what goes on inside my head)
    And you seem emotional, in the degree of thinkless.
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    Really depends on context. is malleable For this forum I snatch a solid 11/10 though.


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    Quote Originally Posted by bgdjf View Post
    i'm feeling like about a 2 on a scale of 1-10. it's probably a defense against having to feel the low level stew of despair, regret, self-loathing, anxiety, and general malaise that's always there to bubble up punctuated by brief respites of amusement or nostalgia.


    ugh. kinda a bummer way to start the thread but i'll go ahead and hit submit instead of deleting it.
    Hello young man,

    I am reading your question - and I hope correctly, not in terms of 'Fe' and 'Fi', but in terms of how we feel?

    If I'm correct, then great. ..... I don't know how I 'feel' in terms of emotional expressiveness or relational distance as such (which is Fe and Fi), but how I feel mostly is a sense of happiness and peace. There's more to feeling than socionics covers. There's the humanness in us all.

    I don't think being an 'F' type affects how we feel, maybe I'm wrong, as any type can be angry, sad, or regret and such as you mention.

    I'd rate myself as feeling happier and more content than most.

    This comes in part from choosing my own priorities, and, as a really great friend of mine told me, we're largely responsible for how we feel, in that, we can chose how we feel, so I chose to feel happy, among some other things.

    It works I think.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Scarper View Post
    Hello young man,
    i'm 44

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    Quote Originally Posted by bgdjf View Post
    i'm 44
    We're all young compared to someone

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    Compared to others, i'm not less emotional - I can get to an 8 on a scale of 1-10. I bottle up during negative episodes by keeping everything to myself and being cynical lol, there is a little bit of emotional suppression day-to-day, but not much. Use to be able to work myself to a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10. Huge crying fits alone in the shower.

    As the years have past, I am able to identify less with my negative emotions, to see them as passing states like grey clouds on top of a normal clear mental state. I used to really feel the harshness of it.

    Memories are actually re-created in the present moment, helpful to remember that. When I do feel bad the brain will amplify negative thought patterns and painful memories. It's as if it's possessed by something that perpetuates itself in me feeling bad - so the brain digs up the most shame-worthy and painful thoughts in order to give life to those feelings.
    Last edited by Glare; 04-05-2018 at 10:36 AM.

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    and yeah, i didn't mean this with any socionics context although feel free to take it there if you want.

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    Someone has said that might sound bit ecstatic.

    That happens on occasion.

    Most of the time I'm just crunching my thoughts although they taste better when you add some spice.
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    i do wonder at the internal subjective experience comparisons, but at least outwardly as an illustrative anecdote i have stuck in my mind, a few years ago at a family holiday gtg while watching tv with my brothers one of my older brothers made a little aside joke by explaining to me while watching something on tv, "See, this is the part where people who experience emotions would be feeling something." to which i replied "fuck you, i feel things!"

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    ehhhh i was in a down mood last night when i started this thread, i might bump myself up to a 3 or 4. i notice though that i do automatically pull back or try to escape from most emotions when they come up.

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    Hmm. Can anybody answer this question?
    You can witness how much emotion other people express, but not how much emotion another person feel.

    You need to compare how much you feel to any other person. And when you don't know how much other people feel how can you tell if you feel more or less then other people?

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    Quote Originally Posted by WinnieW View Post
    Hmm. Can anybody answer this question?
    You can witness how much emotion other people express, but not how much emotion another person feel.

    You need to compare how much you feel to any other person. And when you don't know how much other people feel how can you tell if you feel more or less then other people?
    Empathy, which is not necessarily socionics related.

    Some of it is guess work, some of it is hunches. You can usually tell if someones being quiet you sense there might be something up, it's up to them if they share if you ask them how they're doing.

    So it depends on what you class as expressing, could you not tell if someone you knew appeared to be pre-occupied? So it's not a burst of crying or laughing, but it's something.

    Sometimes it's just missed by me, but on socionics, I've had an F type tell me they really can sense how someone is .. so maybe the sensing of the emotions is F related, but not so sure if caring has to be.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Scarper View Post
    Empathy, which is not necessarily socionics related.
    Yes, of course. But different people have different levels of empathy. To compare people you need a common reference level, at least if you want to compare people on a number scale basis.

    Or in other words: How do you ensure that "by walking in an other peoples shoes you are using the same shoes"?

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    Quote Originally Posted by WinnieW View Post
    Yes, of course. But different people have different levels of empathy. To compare people you need a common reference level, at least if you want to compare people on a number scale basis.

    Or in other words: How do you ensure that "by walking in an other peoples shoes you are using the same shoes"?
    You're right.

    There's psychologists tests to measure empathy, if you're curious of your own, that would give you an objective reference point, some are online too.

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    it can be a miserable combination being empathic along with emotionally repressed. especially with those I feel close with, i fall into this awkward feeling of wanting to express sympathy towards them while drowning in my own tendency to repress the emotions elicited by their emotional expression (even if drawn from subtle cues like Scarper brings up). or feeling like a jealous narcissistic piece of shit having to swallow the spark of bitterness elicited by their obvious (or assumed) joy in strong positive emotions like love or happiness with others who they're sharing the experience with (and not wanting to put a wet blanket over their enjoyment of it).

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    Quote Originally Posted by bgdjf View Post
    it can be a miserable combination being empathic along with emotionally repressed. especially with those I feel close with, i fall into this awkward feeling of wanting to express sympathy towards them while fighting my own tendency to repress the emotions elicited by their emotional expression (even if drawn from subtle cues like Scarper brings up). or feeling like an alien piece of shit jealous narcissist having to swallow the spark of bitterness elicited by their obvious (or assumed) joy in strong positive emotions like love or happiness with others who they're sharing the experience with (and not wanting to put a wet blanket over their enjoyment of it).
    I'm maybe out my depth then, I'm not sure I can have answers for this.

    I don't know if expressing sympathy is something i'll do at least at first, it's tiring thing to do and a level of emotional involvement is taxing on both sides. I will express my gratitude, even at simple things (but how many people do complex things each day),

    Like for instance, today I was at a German bratwurst stand at the Christmas fair, I ordered some fries, then while that was paid for and about served, I then ordered a burger. The woman serving me went to give me my burger, then asked me if I wanted it wrapped. I said yes please (it would be good for me to help me eat the fries, as the burger could fall), when she gave me my wrapped burger I said to her, 'thank you so much for being kind to me.', and I meant it. She seemed genuinely pleased.

    So I don't know if that's expressing sympathy, well it's not, but I was expressing gratitude at genuine kindness.

    For the needing of sympathy, support groups can be good for that - or a special one in a million friend - I'm not saying you need one, or please not to take offense, I'm just guessing from your OP to this one, there's stuff going on that you might need to work through, but what do I know, if I can help I can, or you just posting and doing stuff might be help enough.

    Sorry if any of this was clumsy to you, it wasn't my intent

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    Quote Originally Posted by Scarper View Post
    I'm maybe out my depth then, I'm not sure I can have answers for this.

    ~snip~

    For the needing of sympathy, support groups can be good for that - or a special one in a million friend - I'm not saying you need one, or please not to take offense, I'm just guessing from your OP to this one, there's stuff going on that you might need to work through, but what do I know, if I can help I can, or you just posting and doing stuff might be help enough.

    Sorry if any of this was clumsy to you, it wasn't my intent
    it's all good I made this thread as a way to express how i was feeling/thinking last night while taking a walk while also making a topic out of it so it wouldn't be all "HELP, I FEEL LOW-KEY LIKE SHIT!!! CONSOLE ME!". It's been a good side discussion so far. (and yeah, i'm kinda a mess. this is me talking it out )

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    Quote Originally Posted by bgdjf View Post
    it's all good I made this thread as a way to express how i was feeling/thinking last night while taking a walk while also making a topic out of it so it wouldn't be all "HELP, I FEEL LOW-KEY LIKE SHIT!!! CONSOLE ME!". It's been a good side discussion so far. (and yeah, i'm kinda a mess. this is me talking it out )
    I did well for only half a game,

    http://www.pacxon4u.com/space-invaders/

    I think the tune was putting me off

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    Quote Originally Posted by Scarper View Post
    I did well for only half a game,

    http://www.pacxon4u.com/space-invaders/

    I think the tune was putting me off
    i only had the patience for one life, 8,250.

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    I'm "emotional" in the sense of being significantly neurotic, but also in the sense of being somewhat sentimental. However, I have often been considered rather cold and distant as well as being overzealous in being consistent. I can often be passive or reactive rather than active (i.e. very much being "wait and see"). I think to a certain extent that I have been in a prolonged "off" mode where I am wary of letting myself show my emotions in any strong flavour.

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    7/10.

    I can be a somewhat loud and excessively energetic, a couple of times quick tempered. However, I can also be quite aloof when i'm not interested in the conversation.
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    Can't tell a specific number on a number scale.
    But I guess my empathy level was higher in the past. I met many emotional manipulative people or people that are exaggerating emotion expressions for effect.
    My empathy level really depends on the person. I'm more empathic towards people that I know better.

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    Quote Originally Posted by WinnieW View Post
    Can't tell a specific number on a number scale.
    But I guess my empathy level was higher in the past. I met many emotional manipulative people or people that are exaggerating emotion expressions for effect.
    My empathy level really depends on the person. I'm more empathic towards people that I know better.

    you say that you were more empathic in the past but grew a shell due to being emotionally manipulated and drawn in by exaggeration but it seems to me that that could alternately be seen as your empathic abilities becoming refined and better able to distinguish "genuine" emotions. just something to consider.

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    I think I have average emotions, esp. empathy, but I'm able to completely kill them to achieve whatever objective I need. Fortunately, morals don't just come from feelings of empathy / sympathy and I'm not a huge douchebag.

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    Quote Originally Posted by xerx View Post
    I think I have average emotions, esp. empathy, but I'm able to completely kill them to achieve whatever objective I need. Fortunately, morals don't just come from feelings of empathy / sympathy and I'm not a huge douchebag.
    Yeah it can be similar for me. I´m also not big on empathy in the workplace, especially if/when working with or for a bigger company. I´ve made enemies for this but it´s hard to stray from your natural behavior.
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    Quote Originally Posted by bgdjf View Post
    you say that you were more empathic in the past but grew a shell due to being emotionally manipulated and drawn in by exaggeration but it seems to me that that could alternately be seen as your empathic abilities becoming refined and better able to distinguish "genuine" emotions. just something to consider.
    I guess I'm hard to get to know and I need quite a long time to gain trust. I'm quite selective in matters of friendship irl.

    I worked in jobs that I liked because of the tasks, not because of the people around me. There were a lot of people who were hardly able to handle the stress.
    I had jobs where I had to surpress the expression of my emotions to avoid conflict.

    I guess I'm more empathic in one-to-one conversations as equals, without the need to respect social hierarchies,.

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    This is hard for me to answer. I'm told that I smile a lot for someone of my type, and I can seem "happy" when I'm socializing but when I was younger I really didn't experience a wide range of emotion. Now I've gotten more "in touch" with my emotions so to speak and go through a lot more internal states than I used to. But it still doesn't (and probably never will) feel natural or sincere for me to effusively express enthusiasm or gratitude, or compliment people or things directly. I'm much more comfortable expressing negative emotion and criticism.

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    I like this question but I'm not really sure. I feel unemotional when I compare myself to the people around me, but I just cried while watching stranger things today. But I usually feel like the volume on my own feelings is kinda turned down to a low hum.

    When I want to, I try to turn into the frequency...like when I went on a day trip with a friend recently I felt like I was inwardly trying to turn the knob to 'excitement' and at a funeral I was trying to turn the knob to 'sadness' and I was successful both times but like these feelings don't flow over me strong and uncontrolled like they seem to with other people. I want to feel them, so I make an effort. And that makes me feel weird and robotic. But I'm not robotic in the sense that I'm aware of the emotional realm and try to behave in a way that takes other peoples' feelings into account.

    And this isn't always true. There are certain things I get emotional about without trying. I think those particular things are laid along certain tracks related to old wounds.

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    I give up on this question... I can't even really wrap my mind around this lol. People have different emotional pallettes and tendencies and everyone feels something. I think I'm a 6 regardless of my some of my antagonistic emotions against other people's emotions, since being guarded against other people's emotions is itself an emotional thing. I think I've always been highly sensitive and reactive at least internally.

    Most of my emotions kinda get eaten by overthinking though.


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    8/10

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    If I'm in a movie theater watching something sad I feel I am more emotional than the average person. I'll be the one trying not to let it show while tears run down my face. I'm in general not good at stopping or hiding emotions that come up. If someone else is crying while talking to me, my eyes will probably start tearing up too. I don't know how to stop this, (but it doesn't get in the way of actually thinking about the problem in order to help them solve it.)

    However, when it comes to being easily hurt or finding something someone said offensive, I feel like I'm a lot less emotional than other people. I'm often confused why someone was even bothered by something. I'm not very touchy, and I am not that good at handling people who are.
    Last edited by squark; 12-04-2017 at 03:53 PM.

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    Depends in which context.

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    I'm fairly emotional internally, I have cried from reading fiction before. I rarely express emotion.

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    I don't express a lot of it but I am fairly emotional internally, maybe like a 4 of 10. Our society is designed to produce apathy so I think that lowers where the average is.

    I got the "not very emotional" result on that quiz. I think it fits well, from the glance I took at it.
    Last edited by ouronis; 12-04-2017 at 10:46 PM.

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    i got "extremely emotional" on the quiz @reverie posted. i didn't expect that. maybe this is all there is. :/

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    Quote Originally Posted by lump View Post
    i got "extremely emotional" on the quiz @reverie posted.
    I got following result:

    I'm asking myself if this is good or bad.... oh, value judgement detected inside me.

    You know how to express your emotions

    You recognise that you get anxious when you’ve got a problem and that you can get carried away when you’re happy. You are impatient when there’s something you want and you are capable of getting jealous, sad, happy, worried or falling in love. You can be angry or happy without your emotions taking over too much. You know how to express your feelings and you show your emotional responses while knowing how to hold back when necessary. Even fear can’t knock you off balance – quite the opposite – you know that one of the reasons we feel fear is to signal danger in certain situations. If you’re trembling, if your mouth is dry and your heart is beating fast, it shows that your body is doing its best to find its equilibrium. Apart from showing day-to-day emotions that are the source of enriching exchanges with others – happiness, pleasure, fear etc. – you also like to express the feelings that people bring out in you. The novelist Charles-Ferdinand Ramuz wrote that the art of living might be to take control of emotions that seem out of control. And scientists have already mapped the human genome, which might one day allow us to choose our emotions. If we were able to map the different stages of our emotions, it might confirm what the painter Gustave Moreau once said, that it is best to believe in no other reality than our own. He could be right.

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    i couldn't take the quiz, by two or three questions in it assumes a history of romantic relationships that i don't have.


    reminds me of my English 101 class where the very first day we were given an essay assignment of writing about our first date, which i hadn't (haven't really even now) had, to be read out loud in the next class. i dropped the class and bought a bag of speed with the refund.

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    Way less emotional nowadays than when I was a young person.

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