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Thread: Delta anecdotes

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    Let's go to fairyland Minde's Avatar
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    Default Delta anecdotes

    I remember there being a similar thread, but for the life of me I can't find it.

    So, post little stories, quotes, or anecdotes involving deltas, particularly if you think they typify the type or quadra. Yes, this can be a place to say, "That's not delta, because a, b, and/or c" or to delve into how a behavior or expression could be, say, a combination of factors.

    But I request resisting the urge to devolve into impractical, cyclical other-bashing. Thx, xo.




    ------------------------------------------------------------

    Here's a long anecdote from this weekend:

    I have a friend who volunteers for a nearby wilderness rescue group. He recently did some intensive emergency medicine training, so I asked him about it when I saw him.

    Now, mind you, I easily get queasy and sometimes faint around blood and violence and bodily fluids/functions, etc. So I specifically ask him to skip the gory details. But I was really interested in the general idea because sometimes I wonder how I'd do in emergency situations, and how people make decisions.

    Even with my request, though, a few minutes in I decided I needed to sit down because he hadn't quite figured out my particular queasy tolerance level. It was actually interesting stuff, I just wish I wasn't so queasy. He told me if I fainted to avoid the rolls, lol.

    We talked a bit about various particularly memorable learning moments, and he told me how the "final" for their course was a mock rescue, where three of the class members (I think there were 11-12 people total) became "injured" patients and the rest of them had to save them. The staging area was some woods behind where the classes were, a bit of a distance away.

    Before the exercise, the teacher asked them to decide who they wanted to be as a leader. Apparently much of the group thought my friend would do well, but he was initially hesitant. He definitely did not *want* to be the leader (I think he didn't feel competent enough). But then he thought through the options.

    There were 3-4 people in the group that he would be ok taking orders from (as in, he thought *they* were competent enough). 2-3 of those were probably going to be tapped by the teacher to be the "patients," which turned out to be an accurate guess (likely because they were good enough that the teacher didn't feel a need to test them further). And the other one really did not want to lead. So that meant either he take the role as leader or follow someone he didn't want to take orders from.

    (From my growing experience with him, apparently this type of very logical approach is normal for him - the thinking through the various options when in the midst of the situation. When in a situation, I'm usually more gut-level decision-making.)

    From how he described it, I get the feeling he did mostly ok at the role. I expect he was overwhelmed in terms of intuition. There was some time-critical stuff, plus the weight of "lives" resting in his hands. Lots of stuff happening all at once, lots of data in and data out to manage. One stressful point he mentioned, which made me internally knowingly smile, was that the teacher, who was playing the role of some point person at a base camp or the like, would keep radioing in asking for updates. It was an external time pressure, which threw him off.

    He also made some interesting calculated decisions in terms of controlling his own behavior. Like he purposefully did not put gloves on, which would force him to not personally help with the patients as much as he was tempted to at times (because the others were not fast or correct enough). This is because as someone who is playing point person in that type of situation, he could handle up to about 7 people, managing them, etc. As the situation gets more hectic, that number goes down. But as soon as a point person starts doing hands on stuff, their ability to manage others drops to like 1 or 2 people, or maybe none.

    I asked him if, after he learned from from that test scenario, if he would do anything different. One thing he said is he'd be more assertive at the start in assigning workers to patients, instead of letting them assign themselves. Because different people had different skills and he had a better idea of where to best utilize them.

    He went into a *lot* of detail, and I more or less encouraged it. It is interesting imagining what I'd do in emergency situations, and all the details helped. A couple times it did get a little too much, but I knew that was a risk so it didn't bother me.

    After telling me the main story, he went and got his cell phone to show me a video of a rescue that happened 8 years ago where a helicopter crashed. While he was getting it, another friend came up to get more food (my friend and I were sitting near the food) and started talking with me. My friend got back and showed him the video, too. But shortly after that my friend just sort of oddly disappeared. And didn't really talk to me much the rest of the evening.

    As he was leaving later, he made some passing comment about being sorry about boring me with our conversation, but I was semi-across the room and in the middle of another conversation, so I didn't have a chance to address that...


    Oh, also at one point, he used his feet to sort of drag my chair (with me in it) forward a little because the person behind me kept bumping the back of my chair with theirs. He didn't even really ask, just quietly did it. As for myself, it had barely even reached my consciousness that the bumping was even happening, ha.


    --------------------------


    Betcha can't guess what type I think he is...
    INFj / EII / FiNe
    ()



    "Have courage and be kind." - Cinderella's mom

    "Fear wist not to evade as Love wist to pursue." - Francis Thompson

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    Alomoes's Avatar
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    Hrrm. Let's see if I can fudge one up. Oh and by fudge one up, I mean I have no idea if this is delta worthy or not, or if it is an anecdote. Eh.

    So my dad, he works on cars a lot. Anyways, my car broke down. Of course, he's got me a pretty nice mini coup, of course it is a manual. I'm in NYC. I know what happened because it happened before and he told me. The fan belt blew. Now I know that might be from a low battery, which might be from a bad alternator, but hey, we replace the fan belt. Well, now, the mini is canned because there is a leak in the power steering fluid. Battery is also dead and low. How about that. The TV commercials don't lie, low battery does cause undue strain on your car.
    Figured it out. LIE. I'm extraverted, which is incredibly counter intuitive for a person who doesn't tend to go out much. Don't know how often I'll be on, but don't expect me to respond often. Only option I'm willing to debate is Si vs Ni right now. Mission accomplished.

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    Let's go to fairyland Minde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alomoes View Post
    Hrrm. Let's see if I can fudge one up. Oh and by fudge one up, I mean I have no idea if this is delta worthy or not, or if it is an anecdote. Eh.

    So my dad, he works on cars a lot. Anyways, my car broke down. Of course, he's got me a pretty nice mini coup, of course it is a manual. I'm in NYC. I know what happened because it happened before and he told me. The fan belt blew. Now I know that might be from a low battery, which might be from a bad alternator, but hey, we replace the fan belt. Well, now, the mini is canned because there is a leak in the power steering fluid. Battery is also dead and low. How about that. The TV commercials don't lie, low battery does cause undue strain on your car.
    Well, that counts as an anecdote, yes. And it's of the sort of mundane-to-others yet important-to-oneself situation, which I think can be representative of Delta.

    Do you think your dad is a Delta? If he's worked on cars a lot, why do you think he misdiagnosed the problem?



    ------------------------------------------

    An IEE stands by an open fire, built by a close friend of the LSE persuasion who is crouched and poking the flames. She rotates semi-sporadically, with a soft delighted look and some hand rubbing.

    IEE: If I decided to stay the night sometime, would you build me a fire so I could sleep next to it?
    LSE: *looks at her quizzically then shrugs and slightly smiles* Sure, if you wanted. Why would you want to do that?
    IEE: Sleeping next to a fire is the best feeling ever!


    It was amusing and cute to see their unquestioning and comfortable infantile / caregiver interaction. They obviously were familiar with each other's natures and found it easy to interact while being their natural selves.
    INFj / EII / FiNe
    ()



    "Have courage and be kind." - Cinderella's mom

    "Fear wist not to evade as Love wist to pursue." - Francis Thompson

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    My SLI father is one of the only people I know not to have a facebook. He used to have one right after he got divorced from my mom to help him meet women but he didn't have it for very long. I once asked him why he deleted his facebook and he told me it was because one day at work he had to borrow a hard hat and the only one they had was bright pink. Apparently his coworker/brother-in-law (who he absolutely loathes) had taken a picture of him wearing the pink hardhat and posted it on facebook without his permission. He deleted his facebook immediately and never went back. This story was very interesting to me. Imo, it would be much more embarrassing to admit that you are insecure enough to delete your facebook over such a silly thing than to have a picture of yourself looking "gay" as he said. I should add that he is very tolerant and open minded towards the entire LGBT community and very non judmental in general. But he is a very private person and I think it was half about his privacy and half about his embarrassment.

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    SLI Grandfather (who was in his 70s/80s when this happened)

    Back when google maps and google earth came out, he was soooo excited. He is a very stoic old dude. But thanks to the maps, he was like - I'm not kidding here - like a giggling child. He lives in a different country and could only visit once (health and weather reasons). So, on a weekly basis, he could bond with us on the phone (I'm guessing his motive here) if he could understand the physical context of what we were saying. That is, based on locations we visited as part of our lives. Eg: knowing where my school was, where my mother worked, where we went to buy groceries, where we shopped for clothes, the nearby lake I visited to feed the ducks, the freeways we took, where we went for occasional religious stuff, etc.

    If, as a part of a conversation topic, my mother said, "I have to go to X location for Y business purpose...," he would respond with, "yes, you have to take __ freeway and ___ road to go there. Which exit do you take?... Not exit __? ...(hears comment about commuting efficiency)... I'll look that exit up." Or he would say, "Where did you go for ____? ... I know where that (big location) is! It's right next to (another big location). It should take ___ minutes to go there." I'd insert a comment on how it takes longer because of XYZ factors (eg: it took time for my mother to find a parking spot in a busy mall). It was kind of difficult for him to accept that right away. He would respond, "That's not what it said on google maps." Lol.

    I'm sure any SLI who drives would find those little time-changing factors obvious (right?) but you have to remember that he was really old, hadn't driven in over a decade, was unfamiliar with the systems of my area and hadn't actually been to those places at all. So given all of that, I was amazed he knew anything. Also, just to be clear, he talked about more than just roads (like business news and family stuff) but most of those conversations were with my mother.

    I have no idea how this is delta related, but at the time, teen-me found his unexpected hobby strangely entertaining. So I thought it was worth the mention.

    _______

    LSE Boss

    An LSE woman was my boss on and off for a few months during a freelance job. I later found out that her family was very rich. She didn't need to work whatsoever (trust fund), but chose to work not only in the exhausting freelancing job we were in but also picked up other freelance jobs simultaneously to "keep busy." I think she worked 7 days a week. I was very impressed her capacity for work!

    That being said, she overworked herself so much that once she almost had me fired for a mistake she made. I don't think she saw the chain of events, probably because it was connected to critical but incorrect information she left for me in a voicemail when she was tired. Obviously, it's harder to remember what you did when you were tired. Screwing me over was not OK with me, of course. I quickly forwarded the voicemail message to the right person in the hierarchy and the situation died down soon after.

    But I wondered how things would go from there. Typically, people take out their own negative reactions/fears/concerns on others in subtle or overt ways, depending on how they're wired. So I prepared myself for that possibility. That didn't happen. Although she didn't apologize, the rest of her behavior was professional. That was adequate for me. At the end of the day (last day we worked together), she sent the team (including me) home with a ton of free products (much more than we were allowed to take) because we had overworked ourselves. She kept saying things like, "This bluetooth speaker is really good for X purpose. Did you take one already? Then take one more. Give this one to your family. They'll like it."

    So, in short, she had an admirable work ethic and was generous... when she wasn't trying to fire me for her error

    _______

    I've gone out with and had flirtationships with a few LSEs and SLIs. I was friends with an IEE. I'll post about those people some other time

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    Lots of hussle and bustle today at work, I remarked in passing, 'Why can't you all be like me?'

    To which my SEE friend replied by saying, 'I agree, why can't everyone be a laid back font of knowledge.'

    Hugs to functions.

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    Let's go to fairyland Minde's Avatar
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    I went bachata dancing last night. I don't really do the really close kind, as that seems too intimate for me for strangers or platonic friends. But most of the people there were in more of the open positions so it was mostly ok, except for of course my lack of experience and rhythm.

    I found my technique, or lack thereof, being critiqued by one of my friends, who I think is a ST, probably Delta - either that or a Gamma SF. She isn't an expert in dancing by any means, but she quite accurately observed my movements and told me to change some things. Actually, it was the sort of natural helpful bossiness that made me think, "Huh, LSE..."

    "No, you do this..." and moving me in the right spot. (She only actually physically moved me once, and gently at that. The rest was all verbal and some mild demonstrations.)

    "Try doing this instead."

    "Try to not move your shoulder so much."

    "Bending your knees a little helps, I think."

    We danced together once and she'd quietly announce ahead of time when we were going to spin. I commented that it would be helpful if some men did that, too, and she said, "Well, actually, they do. I thought they were just pushing me around for awhile, which I didn't like, then I realized that meant they were wanting me to turn." Of course I know this, but it amused me to hear her so matter of factly explain it to me.

    I expect lots of people wouldn't like her brand of helpfulness, but I found myself better off and more confident for it so I appreciated it.

    Interestingly, there was none of this "just feel the music and have fun!" stuff from her that I've gotten from others before.
    Last edited by Minde; 12-29-2017 at 02:12 AM.
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    "Have courage and be kind." - Cinderella's mom

    "Fear wist not to evade as Love wist to pursue." - Francis Thompson

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    When I first started university we had an IEE female lecturer introduce the students to the course. She was exuberant and very scattered. I remember finding myself irritated by how all over the place she was. IEE's always have a very light will o' wisp kind of energy. I kind want to ground them in reality.

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    IEE: *has really strong personal judgement about people but feels uncomfortable about expressing it or what it means about herself to have that opinion*
    Me: *it's NBD because you're justified in how you feel and because Reasons & Functionality it wouldn't work out anyway*
    IEE: Huh yeah, ty
    Me: yeah


    Especially so if they are 2w1s.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    It's funny how it works out, because IEEs have stronger Fe(andNe) than EII, yet still both value Fi < Fe.

    With EIIs they typically don't have this problem, at least the kind of intrinsic self questioning or conflict with stronger Fe.
    Rather for the EIIs it's more certainty about how they feel about things and what it means to them, but less inclination to extend from themselves to interfere with other people.

    IEEs have a kind of uncertainty about the reasoning why they should feel what they do actually feel (you can say SiTe if you want to)
    EIIs have an uneasiness extending out into other situatoins (Se), and when they do it's tends to be anchored in Ti, because that's the preferred wrapper of their Fi program, and - I realize now writing this - it's probably associated with Se for them given the blocking.

    I never really thought how, for myself, Se and Ti are together too, and that's why it's so easy for me to toggle Ti on/off given what the situation calls for. I feel like often times EIIs think The Situation Definitely Calls for Ti. (alas I'll write about the Bitch Role Function someday).

    I guess the equivalent of the above for EII would be

    EII: *I have this feeling about things... but I kind of wonder/ am unsure of the circumstances or some outside stuff*
    LSE: *Here's what I know, have observed, some facts and dynamics. This probably happened because of that. Why do you feel/see that?
    EII: *Ok. *analyze* - I feel that because *details/psycheprofile*
    LSE: Nods
    EII: Thanks for sharing that
    LSE: We should get food
    EII: Oh, yeah.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    IEEs know what they feel also, it's just sometimes the winds are blowing about for a while before it becomes obvious to them. I also think they are more likely to not quite understand some things until they see the dynamic play out in talking to others. EIIs feel a lot more inert in this sense. Conservative in their processes. But more likely to need or appreciate or "hope" that someone elses energy pulls them along or fully carries out their manifestation of their feelings.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Let's go to fairyland Minde's Avatar
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    Two LSEs who don't know each other well and are trying to be nice to each other: The topics of discussion are almost always of practical natures, making things efficient, the whys of the mechanics of it, and of course the mechanics.
    - Recipes for bug repelling for apple trees.
    - What they've planted in their gardens/yards and some details on the care routines as well as some history.
    - How and why to load a specific dishwasher a certain way as well as (sort of) generalized principles for how other dishwashers of differing configurations and capabilities might be loaded. And unloaded.
    - Education histories. Where you went, what you did, activities participated in, which classes. Quite a few explanations of why those choices were made. A cursory and yet voluntary excursion into the effects of some of the choices.
    - Asking each other for advice on solving practical problems. What do you do when ____ happens?
    - Telling amusing anecdotes about the people in their lives. Both are cautious not to offend, so the stories are mild and "cute." Smiles and chuckles as opposed to raucous laugher. (Since neither of them are particularly attached to the other's people, they don't always see the humor in the other's stories, but they smile politely.)
    - Stories about house maintenance, repair, and adjusting. They did this to their apartment/garage/attic/roof/etc., used this type of technique, and why.
    - Feelings aren't discussed unless it's as a sort of reason for why a decision was made or is being made. And even then it's a "I feel this is right" in a "right = most practical" as opposed to "right = moral" way, though allowances are made for emotional comfort, particularly of others. That said, morality as a value is a given and assumed by both parties, just not really talked about (yet).
    INFj / EII / FiNe
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    "Have courage and be kind." - Cinderella's mom

    "Fear wist not to evade as Love wist to pursue." - Francis Thompson

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    LSE co-worker.

    She is a manager of ticketing at the basketball stadium I work at. She trains and manages employees who scan customer tickets to get into the stadium. I work on her floor as a tech support, making sure all digital ticketing issues are dealt with.

    These are just a few memories that happened between me an her.

    Before I spoke to her I noticed she had told a family trying to get into the building to "Step to the side please!", assertive voice that sounded almost angry, but she did it without anger and that impressed me. She was physically attractive so i wanted to talk to her and choose to just tease her for being mean to those folks, surprisingly this attractive girl I thought would professionally blow me off smiled and said no she's not mean. She seemed immediately open to playfulness after that. I kept up the teasing for like 2 more comments and she denied it smiling each time, like she knew I was joking but also defending that she is a nice person. We both then said the exact same word at the same time and I played the "Jynx you owe me a soda." game. She quickly was able to keep up with my little witty games and seemed to appreciate them. I liked how she could keep up with my wittyness.

    The next couple times I worked with her I simply just fell into becoming friends with her and her 2 other co-workers. Now, I'm a guy, all of them were women, I struggle with a common issue of low self esteem with women as alot of EII men do, so here I am around this attractive LSE girl, her I think SLI friend and definetely ILE friend, and they all seemed to have an affinity for my natural personality (not bragging lol). I hadn't really been in situations where my natural personality attracted women in a short amount of time like that, I reasoned in my head "Meh, they probably just like me because I'm not trying to be a tough guy." Needless to say I felt appreciated even in all the little ways they picked on me, like purposefully mispronouning my name lol, I knew it came from a place of fondness.

    I had a co-worker that would take my position sometimes at work, and when I got my position back the LSE girl told me that her and her friend had missed me and that they like me better than the other guy. I felt once again very appreciated, especially since I'm E4, that's how you light E4s fire for sure. And I remember when I would leave my position because my manager told me I had to work elsewhere the LSE girl would say "Where you going?!" forcefully too, and playfully tell me I'm not leaving, she also playfully arrogantly said " You are here to entertain me." At this point I knew my company was valued, I started hoping this was a sign that this girl liked me, since I thought she was hot anyway lol. When I left my position she would tell me to come around later and say hi.

    After my position was given to a co-worker for good, on my break I decided to visit her. When I visited her the first time she said "Awwww." and I took that very condescendingly, because it felt like she was sort of saying it like "Oh wow, you actually came to say hi, I was just kidding dude." It hurt but I had no evidence for my assumption, it's just what I picked up from her tone. This made me adjust and not show clear signs of interest like that. (Which later worked out well.)

    Every time I got a break I would go and visit her and her co-worker, sort of making it seem like I came for my own entertainment and other reasons besides just seeing her. At the basketball game one game they had these bread stick balloons that you smack together and make sounds with. I said I only visited to get the toys, she playfully gasped like she was offended, but she seemed like she thought what I said was legitimately rude even thought she found it funny lol. That made me think that she cared whether or not I came to visit, or why would she think it's rude for me to say I ONLY came for the toys implying I'm not there to see her. She playfully called me mean and got all her employees to gang up on me saying "See guys he said you guys don't matter." lol, they all playfully ganged up on me and I loved it, I wacked her in the head with a breadstick balloon, she grabbed one and sword fought me for a while until she thought it was too much lol. Here is when I realized that her job seems pretty boring and then I bring all this fun with me and maybe that's why she appreciates my company, lol it's like a small party at work. I sword fought her co-workers too, she had to get them back in line, but I got a kick out of disturbing her order, and she never seemed mad about it lol almost like she couldn't resist smiling and laughing. I felt like a guilty pleasure of hers.

    I visited on and off, she would complain playfully about me not visiting and her not seeing me anymore. All these mentions of missing me and not seeing me, they always felt very....platonic, they never felt like some deep emotional reveal of feelings or like an attempt to get closer, it just sounded like she was being friendly. That screwed with me, this girl saying she misses me, likes me better than the other guy, complains about not seeing me, yet I don't feel anything from these flattering statements.

    One time I visited her, she was complaining about walking up a huge flight of stairs, I mocked her complaining by playfully impersonating her, and her reaction was sooooo lovely, there was a moment where she caught me mocking her, huge smile grew on her face, she said "Stoooop." and silently walked over to me and just lightly pushed me with a huge smile on her face, it was like a silent Fi moment, I felt it, she walked all the way up to me silently smiling and just pushed me with her body real close to me. This silent playful understanding between us was there. It felt like me mocking her playfully was a guilty pleasure, I loved it, she loved it, it was a silent love of that moment of teasing. The strange thing was, when she complained about the flight of stairs, I had a moment where I naturally wanted to mock her because the faces she was making while complaining was just funny and fun to imitate, but I also feared it might offend her, when I went with my natural gut feeling, I got rewarded with that wonderful reaction. My natural ways felt validated. The thing I WANTED to do but was afraid to do worked so well for her.

    Every time I visited her after that I would find ways to mock her, one time she said goodbye to leaving customers while chewing on something, I mocked her muffled goodbye, she loved it, she went on vacation to Jamaica, I mocked for smuggling weed into the country, she loved it lol, I loved poking her with jokes and mocks and getting a playful reaction out of it, and it was always spur of the moment and never constant to the point of boredom. While I was standing in my position at work on my phone when things were slow, she would walk by me and try to press the buttons on my phone to mess up my text message, she would mispronounce my name on purpose lol and make it rhyme with another word that sounded like the misprounciation lol. She was playful and fun to be around, but it seemed like a guilty pleasure for her to give into my playfulness. When she interacted with customers. She would calmly deal with them with a neutral voice always probing for what the problem was and trying to get someone on it. She would bounce from issue to issue with her walkie talkie handling things that I wasn't even aware was going on lol. In the rush of things sometime she would get real close to me and in a soft and flirtatious voice ask me to do something for her that related to work loooool like she was trying to use female seduction to get me to do a task for her lol. Sometimes when a customer wouldn't have their ticket because of purchasing issues but they would tell her they traveled from far to see the game (alot of people were foreigners) she would give them a pass in a sort of benevolent fashion like (Ok I see your issue and I grant you access.) she never said those words but she often seemed like some sort of queen giving the person mercy loooool. She was empathetic in ways different from me, I remember one time she gave a family a pass who had a child who was just old enough to not get in for free, I thought she let them pass because she felt bad for the child, she later told me she felt bad for the people because ticket prices are so high these days she can understand why they were trying to get him in for free. I was like, wow, a very mature sort of way to look at that, I would have never thought of that. I was impressed by that.

    One time at work she saw people having an issue with a digital ticket, which is my job to handle, I usually run to the rescue when a co-worker says "Hey they need you over there". She looked at me and say "Hey! They are having problems what are you doing!" And I was shocked at her forceful response to me, I took care of the problem, when I was done she told me "You have to be on top of that!" and I received that response slightly harshly but knew she was right, I was silent and looked at the ground when she said that, I don't think she's ever seen me like that, I just felt like her expectation for me to respond before I'm called felt unfair since I was never asked to do that before, I was always asked to respond on call re-actively instead of ahead of time proactively. So it just felt unfair for her to expect me to change so quickly, but I also felt like "Damn, maybe I should be more responsible."

    After having so much fun with this girl and these silent moments of smiles and teasing, that plus her being physically attractive, I started feeling like there was chemistry there, not the strong emotional bonds I'm used to having when I think of chemistry, but a healthy dynamic that we both enjoyed and could be ourselves, which is not common for me with women. This situation with this girl stood out to me because I have never been in a situation where I was with a girl that I thought was physically attractive to the point where I thought she was out of my league and able to fully be myself with much ease. With out trying to impress or project what I thought she wanted she seemed to enjoy my company, and I secretly started to think she liked me, this whole thing was exciting to me, especially since my luck with women let alone attractive women isn't all that great. I wanted to know if she was taken to see if I could ask her out to eat somewhere, so I joked about her trip to Jamaica being a romantic one, she confirmed that it was and her and her boyfriend had a good time. This sucked to here, but unlike previous crushes, this news did not crush me, and it was very surprising to me that it didn't, I clearly liked the girl, I thought we had chemistry that I haven't experienced before, but it doesn't hurt as much. I reasoned that it's because my emotional attachment to her wasn't as strong as my other crushes. It was a healthy amount of chemistry between us and not an obsessively emotionally involved one. I liked her, but I hadn't gone to the point of pining over her because she for the most part kept her tone of voice platonic with the exception of the guilty pleasure teasing moments. I was more disappointed that we couldn't date instead of deeply saddened and emotional hurt by it. I thought this was a good thing and felt like I could move on quickly.

    After all that I was pretty determined to go and find another LSE girl hoping the dynamic would be the same.

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    Actually I know two IEEs who think they are logical thinking types and both claim they evaluate everything thru cold logic. But at the same time they have real issues with logical thinking and it's cause of problems at work. They both aspire very high and keep falling down. And they falling down because they are just not serious at work but they think they are but can't explain why exactly.
    Having both of them, I think it's some kind of pattern in male IEE. Thinking about himself to be rational, serious person, but in the real-world being totally opposite.

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    yeah they need to be liberated, being irrational is the best

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    Quote Originally Posted by falsehope View Post

    Actually I know two IEEs who think they are logical thinking types and both claim they evaluate everything thru cold logic. But at the same time they have real issues with logical thinking and it's cause of problems at work. They both aspire very high and keep falling down. And they falling down because they are just not serious at work but they think they are but can't explain why exactly.
    Having both of them, I think it's some kind of pattern in male IEE. Thinking about himself to be rational, serious person, but in the real-world being totally opposite.
    ive seen this situation play out. There's an obvious IEE at work that's very overtly ambitious but nothing ever seems to completely work out for him. He's constantly enrolling all kinds of leadership seminars and what not. And he really tries his best to come across as assertive in meetings. yet he's always sort of gently swatted to the side by others with more natural gravitas. It can be quite awkward. Myself and a couple other peers have shot past him despite him having almost a half decade more experience in the field. I feel sort of bad.
    ​SLE - Ti

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    Quote Originally Posted by falsehope View Post


    Actually I know two IEEs who think they are logical thinking types and both claim they evaluate everything thru cold logic. But at the same time they have real issues with logical thinking and it's cause of problems at work. They both aspire very high and keep falling down. And they falling down because they are just not serious at work but they think they are but can't explain why exactly.
    Having both of them, I think it's some kind of pattern in male IEE. Thinking about himself to be rational, serious person, but in the real-world being totally opposite.
    There is a programmer at my job who is almost exactly like this. He struggles with the job alot also and it causes problems at work. To me as an EII he definetely appears to have more thinking ability than myself but yea I can see how he aimed high and struggled. he sort of walked into the job like "How hard could this be." and now he sweats at his desk scratching his head.

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    This is a personal story. About 7 years ago I used to go and read in this cafe and this guy who was the barista/waiter and very attractive used to bring me coffee and occasionally ask me what I was reading or what I was studying. At the time I was in a dysfunctional long distance relationship and confused about everything so to the waiter I was shy, a little reticent but friendly. Fast forward to 6 months ago. I was in a cafe in a different suburb with my 3 yr old son and I had just put my cup down when the waiter almost immediately came and started collecting, he started talking about how I could keep the paper sitting next to me which I wasn't even reading and making chit chat. Then he paused for a moment and as I started in my face to express recognition of him as the waiter from years ago he turned and left.
    He was in the back of my mind for a few moths after that. I thought him a bit jumpy but then I thought maybe I should give him the benefit of the doubt and that he might be nervous because he likes me. I realistically could see my life and the things I am struggling with (this is before I was into socionics) things like practical day to day doing eveything for me and my son and I decided to go the cafe and just say hi and be open to maybe getting to know him, he seemed undeterred by the fact that I had a son. I am shy so I had to work up the balls to do it.
    When I got there he came over with the coffee and flirtily reached around my shoulder to put it in front of me, so I turned to him and gave him my best smile and said hi. I had thought of a few possible scenarios and was prepared for most things except what he did. He froze for a few moments looking at me while I smiled encouragingly waiting for him to reply. Then he just walked away saying nothing. I was unsure what to think but I thought it could well be nerves as it's easy to just say a meaningless greeting if you don't care about someone. After I finished my coffee he came to collect it, looked at me, opened his mouth then shook his head and walked away.
    The situaition is still ongoing..
    I think he is sli and this is an example of fe polv. We have amazing chemistry which makes it hard to talk much yet, at least from my side. I didn't type him as my dual at first because I had this weird idea that sli's were not tall and well-built, which he is, but now that's what I think he is. We both have the sx first in our instinct which makes for a bit of nervousness I think because we both want that connection almost too much so that we undermine it.

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    I'm EII male, my dad is SLI. When he calls me he always asks if I need something. When I was a kid I always needed something, and in my early 20s I always needed something and it usually would frustrate him or wear him out. Now I don't need anything and I can hear disappointment in his voice when he asks me if I need anything and I say no.

    Is that like classic caretaker behavior?




    My LSE Pastor the other Sunday preached on the importance of being sensitive to other's struggles. He said alot instead of giving advice, just listen because you don't always know what other's are going through. I'm EII, so of course I'm like shocked to here my LSE pastor say things that seem so central for me. Part of me was surprised and part of me was like duh! lol

    And my LSE friend who saw the sermon said "I always thought you should do that but I didn't know." It was weird yet cool. Like both of them had an Fi moment.

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    all of those are incredibly generic scenarios that could be interpreted in a variety of ways

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bertrand View Post
    all of those are incredibly generic scenarios that could be interpreted in a variety of ways
    To you, but to me in this situation where I know these people and seeing them behave in unusual ways This is the only way I can make sense of their new behaviors.



    Here is an LSE woman complaining abut her slacker EII husband.

    This was a response to a thread called "Do EIIs make good husbands."

    "Its a nightmare and I hate everyday. Go ahead be a dreamer EII but then don't have a wife and kids. I'm no dependent either. In fact I do everything. He just mounts up debt and leads us to bankruptcy so I'm leaving. I think its the biggest piece of loser behaviour and I have no respect for him. I dnd't want children he did I have two beautiful children now but he takes no responsibility. He just goes out does what he wants stays up all night talking about theories and hist then sleeps all day whilst I do stuff. Seriously if you can't get your act together to sort out taxes you are basically a big child . Live that life if you like but don't fucking bring someone else down with you."

    It's like classic LSE/EII problems/fears.

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    Me EII male, LSE female co-worker.


    I grabbed some merchandise from my co worker's stack of merchandise at work, she says "Hey, you can't just come here grabbing things without asking." She sounds serious but she doesn't actually care, is more just yanking my chain. I said "I'm sorry." She misinterprets me and think's I'm saying "I'm sorry?" as if I did not hear what she said, so she says "You heard me! You can't grab things like that!" So I say back "No, I said I'm sorry, sorry for hurting your feelings." as a joke. She looks at me, has a smile on her face but her eyes look serious and mad, like she's trying to hide anger, and then she says in a serious voice "Boy, don't get punched." and takes one of the pieces of merchandise and wacks me with it Loooooool. I feel like I just poked her in her Fi and she got sort of defensive lol. I could be wrong but that's the story I told myself.

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    I often go to the local library with my son. I started to notice a guy who reads in the same back corner near the water machine every time I was in there. I was so curious about how someone could choose to go and sit in the same chair and read in the library everyday. I was feeling some kind of compassion for someone who would choose to do that (was he a recovering addict, had he give up on the world, etc) and I wanted to go right up to him and make conversation about his reading but at the same time I caught myself and held back because sometimes I can get into trouble this way and he had an edginess about him, baseball cap, tattoos, well-worn face, I dunno, I held back. I would walk around there sometimes to look at the talking books or look over at him from a far when getting water. I just got the feeling he was sli, can't explain why, anyway there was a certain awareness of each other. I was not attracted to him in the usual sense but attracted in a curious way.

    Anyway, one day he shifted positions, all of a sudden he was sitting right at the bottom of the ramp that I have to use to go up with the pram to the children's section. I don't no why he chose to move, now I had to pass him, I don't know if it was me or he felt like a change but I felt strangely invaded, angry even. I stopped my curious behavior, mostly, and for months I walked past him without looking at him at all, though I felt him look at me every now and then. Once when we were trying to open a door near where he sat I heard him speak, well he made a rattling throaty sound that I completely ignored. Once I saw him outside the library walking to the library with a suitcase on wheels, he probably has books in it I guessed.

    My son can be very rowdy and sometimes runs up and down the ramp in the library. One day my son ran off ahead of me and I didn't see what happened but when I got to the bottom of the ramp the guy in the baseball cap gave me a really dirty look. Sometimes my son runs and butts into people, even strangers, so I thought this likely. Whatever goodwill I had for this stranger dwindled still as I felt him criticize my son. I swore I would clip him in the pram after that.

    The next time I went the stranger had moved back to his old sitting place. I thought it was all finished.

    Now he is back near the ramp again.

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    what makes this a delta anecdote besides the fact you think you're IEE and you think this guy is SLI

    i feel like this thread is essentially here to stake territory claiming to be a delta, but actually relaying nothing about delta

    its like "anecdotes from people who claim to be delta" not anecdotes about delta or connecting to delta in any way related to the theory

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    My dad is SLI. I recently visited him and he spoke to me about something interesting. He knows I am artistic and love to create things on my computer, so he decided to urge me to come up with something fresh and new that could make money. Animojis are like a new thing on the IPhone, they are pretty much animated emojis, and he was stressing that I design my own and makes some money, stressing that something fresh and new will bring me some income. I understood his intentions, telling me to use my creativity to create income, but he was stressing me to get into things I simply do not care about. Perhaps he is stressing me to use Ne in ways that does not serve my Fi.

    This causes me to ask, is this a form of Ne dual seeking? It seems very Ne DS to me.

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    Well he just doesn't know the business very well, you can create emoji for free but if you want to make money start with web design instead, or print business. Typical SLI.

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    Quote Originally Posted by falsehope View Post
    Well he just doesn't know the business very well, you can create emoji for free but if you want to make money start with web design instead, or print business. Typical SLI.
    My dad was like this when I was younger, i wanted to get into game design art but he told me if i was a programmer instead I could work for NASA. Now he's flipping the script on me and telling me instead of doing something you hate (like he says he is did) to follow my dreams and come up with something new. And I look at him like....0.o? Where is this coming from?

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    My friendship group is overwhelmingly delta NF but we have a stray SLE who hangs out with us some times. The SLE recently was giving us all a speech about how he just realised that other people are people with their own complicated lives and wants / desires / fears as well as problems in their personal lives and some times you have to be understanding of that.

    We all (3x EIIs, 1 IEE & 1 SLI) listened to this moral revelation patiently and then one EII dryly says "SLE just realised that other people, are people." Cue laughter from all the deltas and great annoyance from our conflictor.

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    I saw a local politician running for some office the other day on TV. and his shpeal was about how we need "Fresh ideas, new ideas." To me that sounds so Ne Dual seeking it's not even funny. I immediately type the man as ISTp lol, who knows but it seemed sufficient. He also had this whole farmer, down to earth average person vibe like he was your average american running for office, it could be a image he was using to relate to the people more who knows, or come off as more trustworthy.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    I saw a local politician running for some office the other day on TV. and his shpeal was about how we need "Fresh ideas, new ideas." To me that sounds so Ne Dual seeking it's not even funny.
    Definitely Ne valuing at least.

    A friend of mine is IEE. It took me a long time to figure out whether he was ILE or IEE. He's one of the most positive people I know, which totally refutes the classical Reinin description. Very interested in comparing different people's perspectives and ideas and putting them into a historical context.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mrrrmaid View Post
    My friendship group is overwhelmingly delta NF but we have a stray SLE who hangs out with us some times. The SLE recently was giving us all a speech about how he just realised that other people are people with their own complicated lives and wants / desires / fears as well as problems in their personal lives and some times you have to be understanding of that.

    We all (3x EIIs, 1 IEE & 1 SLI) listened to this moral revelation patiently and then one EII dryly says "SLE just realised that other people, are people." Cue laughter from all the deltas and great annoyance from our conflictor.
    ugh that must have hurt the SLE

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    went to eat with my MBTI INFJ friend and laughing he tells me "I can't just think of myself, of my feelings, when I try I see the void..", me "what void? what do you see? lol like figures?", he "yes figures, like I just can't think of what human things are about..." "lol ok"

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    Quote Originally Posted by ooo View Post
    went to eat with my MBTI INFJ friend and laughing he tells me "I can't just think of myself, of my feelings, when I try I see the void.."
    with such problems he's doubtful to have base F type
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    In fact he's base Ni. we were having that conversation about his artistic process, he can't process his feelings yet his art is all about their force. and that sentence, "I don't know how I feel", was contradicting of what he was just saying, because he was showing to me right there what he was feeling, Fe, yet avoiding to give to this aspect the deep emphasis of a Fi.

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    Recent duality experience.

    LSE friend invited me over to his house to help with a project, we haven't seen each other in a while. I suspected he was LSE when I found out about typology. He had classic caretaker tendencies, I just briefly mentioned my phone was about to die and he immediately offers me a phone charger, always checking on my comfort level asking if I needed a pillow when sitting on the couch, if I want a drink, things that I never think to do when I have a guest over unless they ask because I'm oblivious, but all these caretaker gestures made me feel very welcome and comfortable overall.

    When we started working on the project, I started working on my side of things and he came over and started shooting suggestions at me for solutions to my issues, I would show some slight sigh of frustration he would jump up and say "What's wrong? Just do this, bro just do this real quick." When he suggested me solutions I had the urge to resist because I like being independant, I do not like the sensation of being controlled by no means, so I would stick to my way of doing things and he would insist "Bro just do this, trust me." And at first he wouldn't explain why I should do something he would just tell me to do it, so that made me resist, but he would than briefely explain 'If you do this then than it will fix that problem. Come on it just takes 2 seconds, ok I'll do it." And when I saw his reasoning I gave in because what he had said made sense, and it would be stupid not to do. When I finally slowly but surely let go of the wheel and followed his lead I realized he wasn't purposely trying to control me and he was actually trying to help me, and was helping me. And then I recognized I slowly started using him as a solution, everytime I ran into a problem I got into the habit of asking "Ok what do I do next?" Like I went form 0 to 50 trusting his advice since I seen it work, and when he was helping me he would asking me about things he forgot to jog his memory so I also felt like I was contributing and not completely relying on him. usually when I work with people we sort of get in each other's way because the one solution they may suggest doesn't seem to make sense to me or easy for me to do and vice versa for them, or the way they do things is not the way I do things so it seems like I have to deal with the person and the problem, but with this guy it felt like we both were sort of helping each other solve the problem, like one big brain attacking the problem, it seemed seamless. I later thought maybe this was an experience with the suggestive function, him giving me solutions and me finally giving into them once they made sense and then later even requesting his help. And my Si levels at his house were so satisfied I usually never sleep over peoples house until I've gone there a number of times, but I felt so comfortable and he apparently could tell how tired I was I eventually just knocked out and slept like a damn baby. The whole time I was at his house it just felt like I was just in this fog of comfort, and it also felt like I was a round peg in a round hole, like we hadn't spoke in years but it just seemed like my thoughts, words, actions all we things I did not have to consciously control and like I did not have to adjust myself or act according to the environment, but more like I was a fish, and my environment was water and all I had to do was breath.

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    "7. In order for Base-Suggestive information exchange to occur, there needs to be an incredible amount of trust between you. You won't be able to quickly verify the accuracy of the information coming from your dual. Meanwhile, he will be making such “somersaults”, such leaps and comprehensive assessments on his strong functions that it will frighten you, because you aren't used to this. "

    found this in some thread about an ILE/SEI dual relationship and yea thais is what I experienced when my friend game me that Te advice.

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    This has probably been said with more proper typology terminology, but one thing I know my Fi appreciates about Te is the way it puts limits on my emotions. When my Fi goes crazy feeling not good or like I will never understand something important that I need to or just feeling bad in general, Te can bring up a good point and put an end to the bad feeling quickly or even put a limit on my emotions by stating the clear facts and leaving nothing for me to ponder and worry or feel bad about. I remember I expressed disatisfaction to Adam Strange about ESTjs being masculine and EII being feminine, and he nipped that in the bud by simply saying "don't feel bad, how do you think I feel about being called a victim." refering to Ni ego romance styles. That point he made quickly reined in my bad feelings of self pity and made me realize the fact that the theory isn't pretty for everyone and there's no reason for self pity because I'm not treated worse than anyone, it's like an extinguisher to a fire in those moments.

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    I wanted to report a fresh experience with duality while I was drunk and still am.

    First off i want to say, be quiet @Bertrand this is a place for people to say anecdotes sorry it doesn't fit you descriprtion of what a delta anecdote is, and sorry you do not learn anything from it, either way, shhhh! Nobody cares if you don't like it.

    While drunk I learned from duality:

    - Te is pretty cool and it's ashamed Fi suppresses it in EII, but hey that's what duality is for.
    - The introvert getting drunk and becoming and extrovert stereotype can actually have some truth in it.
    - Just because people are in relationships doesn't mean they are compatible and doesn't mean a dual should leave them alone and let them be in that relationship.(If not already married)
    - Duality is real, and seems deeper than love.


    How I'm gonna attempt to write this is, I'm gonna write what happened, and what I learned from it. Try to excuse spelling errors.

    I'm EII and the girl is LSE, just in case you don't know me or what I'm talking about.

    Ok, so I met the same girl I previously posted I experienced duality with, the one with the boyfriend. She invited me to an event her boyfriend was throwing for his up and coming startup business. I wanted to go solely to see her but was nervous about showing up alone and looking like I didn't have friends (So/sx problems?), so I hesitated quite a bit to actually walk into the event, which I later did not regret one bit. My introverted self showed up at her event alone, without friends even though she encouraged me to invite friends. The event was a bar crawl event, hopping from bar to bar getting a voucher for free drinks. While I was heading to the bar she saw me through the window and pointed at me (as if to say, Hey I recognize that guy, he came!). I walked up to her to s scan my ticket and jokingly said " I don't have friends so I showed up alone."The girl said to me with a soft but relating smile " It's fine I don't have friends either." When she said that it felt like a moment from a movie where people say intimate secrets to each other. Anyway, her and her boyfriend referred to me as the guy that bought a ticket, and she said to me "You bought a ticket! Your so nice." in a way like she really appreciated it, not in a condescending way like I have experienced from her before. Once again I felt like in a movie where people say intimate things to each other in a Romcom. After that I was swirling in feelings of "I feel like she likes me." while talking about the workings of the event (which bars are the vouchers good for , the time it ends, the other people that showed up) Later in the event an ESFP guy that likes the LSE girl I like, showed up, and he sort of hogged conversation with her for awhile, she seemed to entertain him, but she would poke fun at me from time to time about me liking unusual songs the bar was playing. me and the ESFP left her group and used our vouchers to get free drinks from different bars (ESFP used his voucher to get soda only, which I guess would break Se leading stereotypes, i guess) I got alcohol and got a little drunk. I went back to sexy LSE girl and we started talking again while her boyfriend was busy posting his event on facebook trying to get people to attend. I realized when I am drunk I seek my suggestive function aggressively, asking her more bluntly about Te matters. I asked her about her knowledge in her major that could help me, how to get hired at her job, how to help my cousin switch jobs, and one thing I realized was I got her almost like 100% engaged in convo with me, perhaps because I was seeking so hard for Te and she gets so energized by Te. Pretty much I wanted answers to my problems and I asked more openly than when sober, and she got up out her seat and got really engaged is all I can say, like we were hashing it out. I realized, duality isn't just you two are attracted to each other, but you two sort of....idk think alike? Or are concerned with similar things, or it's like you are on the same page, related, family, it's more than love and relationships, when I was durnk I asked her IMPORTANT questions, and she was answering passionately. It was fumy later because these 2 extroverts SEE and LSE both recognized that I must be affected by liquor because I was more talkative, so lol that was funny to me. The LSE recognized the SEE became bored with our conversation about work, school, majors and state laws that we began to talk about. I started to feel like even in the middle of talking about her masters degree I could kiss her, touch her, something but her boyfriend was right there. It was a passionate discussion of life, and our experience with it. From little details to bigger goals. And I saw my demonstrative Ni trying to advise her to go a certain direction for her goals, she was sort of dodging my suggestions and saying maybe I was drunk lol but she didn't seem to be angry or annoyed. Idk she started to feel like a sister I cared about and wanted to talk about family business with, aggressively lol. I recognized her boyfriend might not be her dual and she seemed to be frustrated with not having the ability to make smart decisions for his startup. But me and the ESFP seemed to be a sort of fun distraction for her. From the intimate feelings I met from first seeing her there to the strong discussions we had later about general life, I felt like man, duality is real lol, not only is this girl hot but I feel like even though we haven't known each other long it seems like we can talk like we have. And she smiles at my mere presence, which is a great sign that she is attracted to this EII right here . And all these initmate feelings I felt eminating off her aswell, I don't have like a factual way to state that or proof, it's just a feeling, the soft smile, the getting close to me, the laughs and smiles at my presence, it all said to me "I kinda like you...". But I'm willing to accept that maybe I am projecting my own interest for her onto the way she might see me. Even though I don't think I am.

    Duality report done.

    PS. I used to think extroverts where kind of shallow and Te was kind of shallow, but idk when I was tapping into Te it just seemed like the ability to express the truth about what you think, it was pretty awesome. Fast expression too.
    Last edited by Lord Pixel; 08-04-2018 at 04:56 AM.

  39. #39

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    Don't know if this is a duality thing but, I realized I can enjoy talking to LSE about absolutely nothing. I guess that's the whole, "Duals can just relax in each other's presence" sort of thing.

  40. #40

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    So a couple weeks ago I saw a certain aspect of LSE, like that week was themed with that Aspect.

    I read in romance styles that Si egos, their Si gives them a dormant sleepines inside.

    from the sociotype site.
    "The individual's own dynamic and introverted Si perceptions lead to a sense of sleepy drifting in them, which makes him welcome Ne impulses from another person designed to shake him out of it from time to time."

    And then I watched a video from an LSE, Mel Robbins, about how the mind becomes more alert when presented with new information, and that the soul needs exploration.

    And then that Sunday my pastor spoke about not always clinging to the old way of doing things and that sometimes you need a change.

    The week seemed to have a theme of LSE's need for Ne somehow. And when I hear "The soul needs exploration." I thought of Ne, Fi. And when I heard my pastor say somtimes you need a change I thought about someone feeling stuck in Si seeking to be energized by Ne.

    Perhaps reading the romance style for Si egos made me more aware of information that lined up with it. But it was interesting to see how someone seeking Ne manifests. I could be way off but those were my initial thoughts.

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