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Last edited by Pastel; 11-05-2017 at 06:32 AM.
He sounds like a pretty stereotypical Delta ST so activity or duality. Also he sounds self-pres first in instincts, and you sound self-pres last. Could still be a good instincts match if he's sp/so and you're so/sx
Hi Economist!!
Thanks for your input!
But I actually wonder, like... what if my friend and I were actually of superego relations? Like what if I were actually an INFp, and not an INFj. Idk... A lot of such thoughts often plague me. Do you think that there is a way to tell for sure that a person is an INFj, and not an INFp?
Superego relations aren't characterized by omnipresent strife. I have multiple close LSI/superego friends. What distinguishes superego from other friendships is that you occasionally hit each other's polr. Tension occasionally arises in all close friendships. In a superego one, it comes from polr hits, accidentally making each other feel bad about your respective polr's, subconsciously thinking your creative IE must be important for everyone and trying to nudge the friend into using it more, which makes them feel self-conscious, unskilled, annoyed.
This doesn't sound like he's hitting Te polr, it sounds like you like his Te, which is INFj.
I haven't seen any evidence for IEI in your posts or typing threads, so I think the burden of proof is on you. It's common for EIIs to self-mistype as IEIs and have a lot of superficial traits in common.
Like Rebelondeck, I also wonder if you are biased in your descriptions. Your OP in this thread sounds like you're listing Delta ST stereotypes and saying what you don't like about them to try to look more IEI-like. But you're not saying the things that an IEI would dislike. The drink temperature and weather stuff could be Si-valuing, but could also be self-pres in instincts. I personally hate talking about that stuff despite being EII, because I'm self-pres last in instincts.
I think Stratiyevskaya's EII and IEI descriptions provide a very clear picture of the differences between the two in overall vibe. If you can be honest about yourself to yourself, they would make it easy to tell which you are.
> I often expect things from him, which he wouldn't be able to fulfill, thus disappointing me a lot.
bad relations
in good ones your wishes get the needed answer
until you are in "good" external conditions your relations may satisfy you, but if your life will become harder and you'll need more of support in a pair - your relations will annoy you both
The relations where you have a small support are bad.
"expect things from him, which he wouldn't be able to fulfill"
> I expected silly things like him replying me quickly, to prioritize me, etc. Kind of unrealistic expectations
That you perceive your relations as self-centered is bad trait too. It's more like you in the center where the other should to serve your needs. In good relations you lesser think by own needs, but more by the needs of both. If there is no quick reply, then it's not comfortable for him do so - you accept this with compassion. While to "prioritize" you should have closer and more sincere relations, while you seem to be pals, not friends which have serious soul's attraction.
Your IR may be different, but your relations as they are - not good.
I'm not able to tell from a superficial description; I'm certain that INFjs can peer much deeper. Also, I think that a mature INFj with no personal issues or bias can be "completely objective" but not being able to be so would cast doubt on any description that that person provided.
a.k.a. I/O
This isn't really a lot of information, but the main things that stand out are 1) weak Fi and Fe, lack of understanding of emotions and sensitivity 2) possibly ego Te due to the drink example, attentiveness to how to make the most of resources 3) being laidback and talking about the weather looks like attention to Si. So he does sound Delta ST. It is possible that you are IEI considering your relationship with him.
An EII could get annoyed because of excessive focus on Si, it's really hard to say.
What is more unusual is the greeting situation, this is more of an Fe criticism since it has to do with etiquette and less to do with the specific relationship involved.
But again I must stress that this is NOT sufficient information to type you by, so take it with a grain of salt.
I mean, he knew it was your mom and didn't say hi? Or he saw a random older lady and didn't say hi? The way I see it: 1) The drink in purse scenario is a non-issue unless you carry like a very pricey designer purse, in which case you could have let him know your purse is expensive & if his drink spills he will be paying for it. 2) Talking about the weather = small talk and it's pretty regular to bring up - but if it's taking up a large amount of your convo, that would be an issue. You could easily be IEI but the behaviors that irritate you are not the same as ones that irritate me. Bothersome behavior in men to me, is when guys expect certain things from me immediately instead of making things flow more naturally. However... like you I want guys to have etiquette, not be rude and yeah I'd be pissed if a guy knew it was my mom and didn't greet her. You say you wanted him to ask you qs about yourself; did you ask him a lot about himself?
Last edited by summerprincess; 09-15-2017 at 02:36 AM.
Your type is EII/INFJ, while her seems to be some P-F type.
You'd could to look at my IR test to get a chance for a proof. In short you'd could to compare generalized impression of psychic comfort of LSI/SLE vs LSE/SLI. I don't know how to explain you better that your type is not INFP. Ah.. you can also look at EII and IEI examples there and understand which type is more pleasant for your soul.
You are the only which I typed with assurance to my duals on this forum and you disagree with me. This makes me sad.
You may mistake in the degree this could not be at EII type. I'm also not a standard LSE in some senses and that's why I needed to use IR to understand own type in the past. Many people don't fit excellent to types descriptions, but they fit ok anyway - they understand this better later, when come to own real types.
Your talking style is not like P types speak. And your nonverbal gives me impression closer EII than anything else.
You may try to use my types examples to check am I right about your type. If to use men of few types (like was described above), this will not take long. Such also you may get more arguments for beta type, if it's such. Intuitive impressions from nonverbal of men - this is not hard for your N type.
P.S. you look very cute on your avatar. very Fi like
“My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.” —C.G. Jung
At 1st I was right - I have typing skills to be sure in types. Maritsa's type was ENFJ most probably and definitely not INFJ.
At 2nd it's exaggeration as my feelings are far from what base F have. Also I get more fun, than bad emotions from the situations on forums, including this one.
At 3rd I may understand what and how people may like or not. Even without own experience.
> You can't see LSE as a stag?
I don't use the needed drugs.
Also she seems to like SLI more, so they are more probable.
That is just rude then of him, no matter what type people are it's common manners to greet your date's mom. Also he doesn't sound like a great conversationalist; maybe try to just offer up the information about yourself. Like if you asked him "where did you eat lunch today?" He says "At chipotle" you just go right along and say "Cool, I ate lunch at _____." Even tho he did not ask you it works to help carry the convo
Thanks @summerprincess for the suggestion! Will try that out next time (:
Typing aside, I think any type would find it rude that he didn't even bother to greet your Mom. If I were in your shoes though, I'd be like "Dude, what's your problem? Why'd you ignore my Mom like that?"