Please help me figure this out for once...

**chwoey** · 04-22-2017, 02:42 PM

Hello, I am one of those sad people who can never pin down their type. I have spent a lot of time looking at MBTI/Socionics and I just can't figure how the functions directly relate to me and my behavior.

I don't think I want to post a video because people just always say I am a ESFp which I cannot believe. There is nothing about ESFps that I can see in myself, except for being playful at times, which I would not say is something only they do. You can look at my instragram however, there are a few photos of myself(and my SO) at the bottom : https://www.instagram.com/chwoey/

I have quite the complex about myself, I am pretty convinced that I such socially. I have a hard time making friends because I don't try to talk to people, I keep to myself a lot. I made a good friend in the past year and I constantly am confused as to why they talked to me, why they hang out with me, why do they make an effort.. I wonder if they have anterior motives.

I am an auditory thinker, not a visual thinker at all. If someone tries to explain something to me I need to see it visually, I can't imagine it in my head.

I am successful academically, I am a mechanical engineering student. I am very good at learning from a teacher, for example I just got a A grade in my calculus 2 class. I am pretty quick at understanding concepts and methods of solving things. I have a harder time with memorization, but I can still do okay with it. I am a good problem solver, generally.

I am a rather lazy person. I don't like to clean or do things.. I enjoy cooking at times, but only when I can distract myself with tv or youtube. I would rather sit around all day playing on the internet than doing anything real. I can easily live in a mess and not be bothered by it at all.

I'm the type of person who shows their emotions. If I am happy I smile, if I am annoyed you can tell. I do not have a poker face at all. I am very expressive. This can be a bad thing as I cannot hide if I dislike people. I can be very emotional at times, crying based on tv shows or movies(this is something I am ashamed about and hide).. But I am less emotional about real life. I don't cry a lot or get very emotional. I can get pretty hot headed when someone pushes my buttons, however.

I am a very hard worker when I comes to school and work. At every job I have become a very important worker due to the amount of effort I put into jobs. I have only worked in service jobs, but at all of them I have been greatly appreciated by my supervisors/managers. I have often been promoted rather quickly, becoming a manager at one job after a few months and a print lead at another after about a year.

I have a boyfriend that I have been with for about 4 years. We live together with my cat Olive. He says 3 words that describe me are: "Silly, Intelligent and bubbly". We are very playful together, we act silly and talk silly. I do get mad at him on occasion but he is very good at dealing with me. I don't know if we are duals, but we get along better than anyone I've ever known before. I think he is SLI.. I do find he is a bit of a know-it-all sometimes however.

I could probably write forever, but I will leave it at that.. Feel free to ask me questions.

**chwoey** · 04-22-2017, 02:55 PM

Oh yeah, and I am one of those people who thinks everything is amazing. Like, electricity. What the fuck is with that shit.

The earth? holy fuck so cool, volcanoes and dinosaurs and shit. damn..

Human bodies? DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED.

**squark** · 04-22-2017, 02:55 PM

Have you considered ILE? and ESE? Take a look at both of those.

**Bertrand** · 04-22-2017, 04:41 PM

that nose ring is alpha/delta for sure

**chwoey** · 04-22-2017, 05:14 PM

Originally Posted by squark

Have you considered ILE? and ESE? Take a look at both of those.

ILE was actually the type I thought I was for a long time when I first started looking at personality types. I did a MBTI test like 6 or 7 years ago and I got ENTP. I stuck with that one for a long time.

Reading the female ESE portrait by Beskova, a lot of it sounds like me. A lot does not. I agree that I can be loud and energetic, resourceful in flirtation.. But I am lacking when it comes to my appearance. I am not very neat, often my hair is greasy and I am barely put together. I mean, I CAN look good, but I usually don't. I'm not very stylish, really.

Actually, it all seems a little too involved. Oh, I don't know.. ESE seems too busy, where I am more happy relaxing and being a lazy bum.

Originally Posted by willowglass

What do you think about the quadras? Is there one you can relate to more than the others? Have you tried taking socionics tests? What did you get on those? It seems from some of the things you've said you have low dimensional or unvalued Si.

I don't know, its hard to say. Obviously, Alpha seems the most cool and the group I'd want to be in. But I think I might be deluding myself and actually be a gamma or something.

I've taken tons of tests. My results vary a lot, recently I've been getting SLI in the top position, but I think I may have been reflecting my partner instead of myself.

Originally Posted by Bertrand

that nose ring is alpha/delta for sure

Hahaha, whaaat? I don't have it anymore sadly, worked in the food industry and stopped putting it in.

If it helps my hair is usually purple, right now its a super faded grey colour cause I am too lazy to do it again.

Might switch to normal hair colour again soon though.

**Adam Strange** · 04-22-2017, 10:20 PM

So my first impression from your instagram pics was ENFp (IEE), basically from the pictures of food and the decorative fingernails and the cute cat pictures. Your statements about happily living in a mess (low Si) and about the mechanical engineering (Te) just added to that, and your BF looks kind of happy and like he can be goofy in private, which points toward SLI (and I only later read that you think he might be SLI).
What counts against EII is your statement that you are not that social.

The other type that came to mind was ESI, because you have artistic fingernails and a couple of your pics kind of VI as ESI (but not all), and because you said you work hard at work and school, you over-analyze people relations, and you can't hide how you feel about someone.

I think you have Fi eyes and maybe a delta face. Might be an ESI face, might be an IEE face. Hard to say.

These are just wild guesses, though. In reality, I suck at typing.

**chwoey** · 04-22-2017, 11:18 PM

Originally Posted by Adam Strange

So my first impression from your instagram pics was ENFp (IEE), basically from the pictures of food and the decorative fingernails and the cute cat pictures. Your statements about happily living in a mess (low Si) and about the mechanical engineering (Te) just added to that, and your BF looks kind of happy and like he can be goofy in private, which points toward SLI (and I only later read that you think he might be SLI).
What counts against EII is your statement that you are not that social.

The other type that came to mind was ESI, because you have artistic fingernails and a couple of your pics kind of VI as ESI (but not all), and because you said you work hard at work and school, you over-analyze people relations, and you can't hide how you feel about someone.

I think you have Fi eyes and maybe a delta face. Might be an ESI face, might be an IEE face. Hard to say.

These are just wild guesses, though. In reality, I suck at typing.

I will reply to this properly later. I'm about to run out the door. You definitely made some good points, It makes more sense to me that it would be IEE than ESI, as I don't think that Fi would be my dominant function. Though I'm not sure.. My instagram is a lot from when I was studying graphic design, I've since realized it wasn't my thing. I do enjoy painting my nails to look pretty though, a recent development (past year or so).

However; I would like to know exactly what Fi eyes look like. I am very curious. I hear people saying Fi eyes or Ni eyes or whatnot, and I just have no idea how the eyes relate to the functions.

**squark** · 04-23-2017, 12:23 AM

Originally Posted by chwoey

I don't know, its hard to say. Obviously, Alpha seems the most cool and the group I'd want to be in. But I think I might be deluding myself and actually be a gamma or something.

I don't think you're deluding yourself. Based on what you wrote alpha fits better than anything else imo.

**Singu** · 04-23-2017, 07:28 AM

I don't really want to type anymore but you look and sound SEI/ISFp...

**chwoey** · 04-23-2017, 02:52 PM

Originally Posted by Adam Strange

So my first impression from your instagram pics was ENFp (IEE), basically from the pictures of food and the decorative fingernails and the cute cat pictures. Your statements about happily living in a mess (low Si) and about the mechanical engineering (Te) just added to that, and your BF looks kind of happy and like he can be goofy in private, which points toward SLI (and I only later read that you think he might be SLI).
What counts against EII is your statement that you are not that social.

The other type that came to mind was ESI, because you have artistic fingernails and a couple of your pics kind of VI as ESI (but not all), and because you said you work hard at work and school, you over-analyze people relations, and you can't hide how you feel about someone.

I think you have Fi eyes and maybe a delta face. Might be an ESI face, might be an IEE face. Hard to say.

These are just wild guesses, though. In reality, I suck at typing.

So, in regards to my socialness. When I was younger I was very social, I was always a little shy with strangers but I was VERY outgoing as a child. When I have someone around who I am comfortable with I can be rather social as well. My main problem comes from my complexes. It's like I built up a hard shell to keep myself safe from the dislike of other people. I'm convinced I don't need em, so I keep myself safe. I've like crippled myself where I don't know exactly how to socialize with new people.. but I like being around people I feel safe with.

For example, when I have family dinner with my folks, my BF and my brother I am the most talkative person there. I dominate conversations with them and dinner would probably be pretty dull if I wasn't there.

I get ESI a lot, people usually VI me as ESFp or ISFj.. I don't know though, I know this is super stereotypical, but I'm not the type to want to like "artistically express" myself. When I used to "make" "art" it was to try and prove that I was good at manipulating the medium. I never tried to express myself, just show off.

I mean, this is going to sound SUPER cocky, but I tried studying graphic design before cause I thought it was cool, I thought people would think I was cool. I'm pretty good at doing almost everything, so I figured this would be a piece of cake too. I realized that, though I was VERY good at using the computer programs, trying to visually represent ideas was not my strong suit. I've recognized that my top skills are at math and solving problems and using computers.

In school, I get nearly perfect grades in math and technical courses and bomb the more... artistic ones.

Its hard for me to think of myself as a Fi dominant as for the first 14 years or so of my life I was pretty oblivious to my relationships with other people. I came across as domineering and bossy and many people didn't like me at all. Apparently my best friends would hold secret sleep overs and not invite me because they liked having time without me around.. I had NO IDEA. I'd think a Fi-dom would be more aware of things like that.. I could be wrong though.

Originally Posted by squark

I don't think you're deluding yourself. Based on what you wrote alpha fits better than anything else imo.

I just see the whole "Merry" thing, and I think, though I can be cherry and fun sometimes.. I can be a pretty serious person. When relaxed I would describe myself as merry, but as soon as I face any adversity I become pretty hard and serious.

Originally Posted by Singularity

I don't really want to type anymore but you look and sound SEI/ISFp...

Very different than what everyone else has said.. I wish I could take it more seriously but with no rationale at all it's hard for me to accept that. I mean, it could be the case. But I always imagined SEI being kindof meek and docile.. Which I am not.

**squark** · 04-23-2017, 03:54 PM

Originally Posted by chwoey

I just see the whole "Merry" thing, and I think, though I can be cherry and fun sometimes.. I can be a pretty serious person. When relaxed I would describe myself as merry, but as soon as I face any adversity I become pretty hard and serious.

Being in a merry quadra doesn't mean you're all woohoo all the time, and can't be a serious person. Also, ILEs are constructivists if reinin dichotomies interest you. The more you write, the more I think ILE makes the most sense overall. When reading your first post these were some of my thoughts (I usually don't share my thoughts on how I make type suggestions) "Some social insecurity could be weak ethics, unsure of where stand with other people. Weak evidence for logical type, but something to consider. A verbalizer, interesting, and good at problem-solving . . . this probably means she's strong at Ti, because to solve problems in that way, and yet not visualize them would require Ti. Easily affected by Fe (the movie stuff) but not otherwise emotional probably logical Fe-valuing type. Hard worker, amount of effort . . .hm, this is more likely to be how an SJ would see/describe themselves, don't entirely eliminate ESE/LSE yet. Silly, intelligent, bubbly, ha yeah eliminate LSE, but ILE even more likely, and ESE of course not eliminated by that." Other things you wrote point towards extroversion. Your follow-up posts cemented the idea further of ILE, though I'm wary of how a conclusion can influence perception when typing.