Aspects of sx/so

[Aylen]

Those descriptions are not useless I guess, but they're stereotypical and there is way more to the types than that. It's deeper. And the "loves suffering" is all 4s especially sx because sx is the masochism of wanting what you can't have, mixed with 4s obsession with what is missing plus melancholy fix.

It's very rare that someone reaches healthiness in the enneagram, the vast majority of people are average to unhealthy, just a sidenote.

4s are reactive so they have a temper, yes. I used to be extremely reactive when I was young. I grew up with my so/sx 6 sister thats also a reactive type and we fought ALOT and still do, her social first made me so fucking annoyed and insecure while I didn't have this affect on her because she doesn't have sx as her last, so it's kind of like her hitting my instinct PoLR haha. For example, when we were out in public and I would talk to some cashier or something, and she'd mentally face palm at everything I did, like if i asked what the cashier was saying because I didn't hear it she would be like "omg haha" and mock me because in her world that was bizarre and I shouldve apparently just nod and smile instead of ask what she was saying. She thought i was being rude and weird (i dont get her). sx/so and so/sx see social lasts as "dark and weird" because they lack the seriousness of sp themselves.. Social lasts are generally bad at small talk or don't care. She would mock me because I was different and bad at socializing with people which hit me really hard because I was already feeling different and like an outsider, and because of this, growing up I went through phases where I tried to act and look like everyone else for a while, because I wanted to fit in so bad and be with the "mainstream people" (synflow) but it just made me miserable and I failed in the end anyways and always went back to being different and looking how i wanted to. I don't know how many style and behaviour changes ive gone through the years.
What would really drive me off the walls growing up was my family teasing me when I was upset, or when I was depressed and wanted people to feel bad about me, but they wouldn't. I hid my sad feelings and replaced them with anger in front of my family because I didn't want them to be able to 'reach me'. I was a fan of throwing things when i was upset and i threw all kinds of things when people got on my nerves, alternatively hurting myself. I remember at times I had the urge to kill certain people because I was that reactive.

I can relate to some of this very much...

*Pretty sure I could not actually kill anyone intentionally. I was more scared of it happening unintentionally while seeing red. Throwing heavy things can lead to manslaughter charges. I am not really afraid of going to that dark place anymore. I like my stuff too much to throw it at people, now.

[Rohan89]

I find the discussion in the first few posts of this thread very interesting, regarding the types of sx/so.

Here are some of the things written:
Fireside sx/so - strong sx, weak soc and weaker sp. - pulls from sp/sx shadow to intensify sx. exhibitionism, wild abandon, most 'on fire' of all stacks or stack ranges.

Flirter sx/so - strong sx, moderate soc, weak sp. - highly sociable and extroverted per type, flirtatious interaction style, more coy than firesiders but more risque than coolsiders.

Coolside sx/so - strong sx, strong soc, weak sp. - pulls from so/sp secondary, political activist streak, 'cooled' by soc with some intellectual reserve, channels sx into social causes.
seducer - sx with no brakes
mystifier - sx with an emergency break
wanderer - sx with brakes


I would definately say I am the "Fireside", and I resonate with the "Seducer" as well- although I think anyone who's not seriously unwell has some sort of 'brake'. I can be the 'straight man' if absolutely required, for a short space or time, I just really don't like to do it.

I am a 4w5 485 (8 very strong) sx/so


To be honest I just thought every sx/so was a Fireside. Didn't know they're were lighter on versions.
I suppose Russell Brand would be a Mystifier/Flirter.

Maybe the type of sx/so had a lot to do with enneagram type.

[Adam Strange]

I find the discussion in the first few posts of this thread very interesting, regarding the types of sx/so.

Here are some of the things written:
Fireside sx/so - strong sx, weak soc and weaker sp. - pulls from sp/sx shadow to intensify sx. exhibitionism, wild abandon, most 'on fire' of all stacks or stack ranges.

Flirter sx/so - strong sx, moderate soc, weak sp. - highly sociable and extroverted per type, flirtatious interaction style, more coy than firesiders but more risque than coolsiders.

Coolside sx/so - strong sx, strong soc, weak sp. - pulls from so/sp secondary, political activist streak, 'cooled' by soc with some intellectual reserve, channels sx into social causes.
seducer - sx with no brakes
mystifier - sx with an emergency break
wanderer - sx with brakes


I would definately say I am the "Fireside", and I resonate with the "Seducer" as well- although I think anyone who's not seriously unwell has some sort of 'brake'. I can be the 'straight man' if absolutely required, for a short space or time, I just really don't like to do it.

I am a 4w5 485 (8 very strong) sx/so


To be honest I just thought every sx/so was a Fireside. Didn't know they're were lighter on versions.
I suppose Russell Brand would be a Mystifier/Flirter.

Maybe the type of sx/so had a lot to do with enneagram type.

I'm somewhere between a Flirter and a Coolside sx/so. Sx and So are about equal, with weak Sp.

[Rohan89]

I'm somewhere between a Flirter and a Coolside sx/so. Sx and So are about equal, with weak Sp.

Really interesting.
I feel like a wild horse that needs blinkers, and to be pointed in a certain direction. Otherwise I can fritter away my energy manically and in useless ways.