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Thread: I don't want to be EIE-ENFj

  1. #81

    Default Being an ENFJ

    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5

  2. #82

    Default Typing yourself in Enneagram

    [quote="Expat"]
    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I can't decide which enneagram I am. I might be either 3 or 6 or maybe something else. My main purpose in life is to have a purpose in life. I can't stay still in a "safe" situation if I'm not changing anything, or influencing anything... that's why I don't think I'm 6. (I thought I was for a while). I might be 3, but I don't think I pretend to be someone I'm not. I do the opposite - I try too hard to show the "real" me. I always correct myself if I think I mislead the other person. I might be 1, but I doubt it.

    I do not agree with his relationship pairings, but I stand by Keirsey's Please Understand Me II, book, and recommend getting it from the library or buying it. I absolutely disdain anything else on-line that calls itself a type test. Its all innacurate crap.

    Lefty ENFJ 4w5

  3. #83
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    I had to work with one ISTj. That was frustrating. Not what you'd expect from duality. There's this INFj who is probably the most fun person ever. She doesn't misunderstand me all the time. I know a couple of ESTps. I sometimes feel like shooting them just to accelerate to course of events - they keep doing really dangerous stuff so I feel like they are going to get themselves killed either way, so I'd rather not see them taking anyone with them. I'm dating an INTp and we have a weird sort of sync. We don't argue and we aren't really negative towards each other. (yay for supervision). I have an INFp sister. When we talk, she talks 3/4 of the time and we are very different. Relationship-wise I'm clearly ENTj.

    So yes, I know I'm not the perfect example of the type, but you have no right to tell me to stop whining. If I wanted pity, I wouldn't have posted that first thread. I was stuck. I needed advice, I needed direction. People did have the "awww" reaction, but mostly I think I was explaining the situation as well as I could. I had been thinking about it for a while and then I wrote it down. It sounded too dramatic.

    I don't think I'm enneagram 6. I might be biased about 6, but I don't think I'm that bad. I never do anything to achieve any 6 goals. Having a safe life is important, but I would risk safety if it gave me power in return. I am a careful and calculating person, but my main objective is to get more "profit" from everything that I plan. I never plan for the safest outcome. I plan for the highest possible achievable goal.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.

  5. #85
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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by Benny
    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.
    Are INFp that scornful?
    All Hail The Flying Spaghetti Monster

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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by oyburger
    Quote Originally Posted by Benny
    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.
    Are INFp that scornful?
    Only if they're in a bad mood.

  7. #87
    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    God. ANY type can be scornful. Geez.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  8. #88
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gilligan87
    God. ANY type can be scornful. Geez.
    awww... Gilly, don't worry, not all INFps are scornful all the time.


    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    We're the second rarest personality type.
    Can't be true. Where did you get that information? ENFjs are supposed to be among the more common types.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

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  9. #89
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    Supposedly, ENFj is the rarest of the extroverted types--estimates range from 2-5% of the population--I've seen these statistics places, (mostly on MBTI pages,) and frankly can't vouch for their validity... Could be total nonsense...

    Certainly, INFjs are more rare--INTJs as well. Perhaps even ENTjs... at least, based on my experience.

  10. #90
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    ...and lefty_liberated, behave more kindly. come on.

  11. #91
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by Benny
    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.
    I think she's just not a 4w5. Fought with her on the enneagram board and she reminded me an ENFj Fe subtype I know IRL. On PMS.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  12. #92
    Creepy-pokeball

    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by Benny
    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.
    I think she's just not a 4w5. Fought with her on the enneagram board and she reminded me an ENFj Fe subtype I know IRL. On PMS.
    I dont claim her

  13. #93
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Being an ENFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by Benny
    Quote Originally Posted by lefty_liberated
    Get over it.

    I'm an ENFJ, too.

    We're the second rarest personality type.

    Maybe not having much reflection in society is making you behave narcissistically. If I were you'd I'f find an inspector quick, because you're behaving inconsistantly and giving us a bad name. Of course some sucker will be drawn into the way you began the topic, but it'd be more interesting if you could learn to express yourself assertively instead of sucking people in by feeling sorry for yourself.

    Are you interested in Enneagram?

    Lefty

    ENFJ 4w5
    ENFJ and 4w5 don't go together. You are too scornful to be an ENFJ too. I reckon you're probably an INFp if you're 4w5.
    I think she's just not a 4w5. Fought with her on the enneagram board and she reminded me an ENFj Fe subtype I know IRL. On PMS.
    lmao. That must be one of the most extreme stereotypical crazy woman images...
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
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  14. #94
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    I had a thought and I wanted to say it but I didn't think it deserved a thread. So I'm writing it here.

    Sometimes people are described with a saying,"like an elephant in a china store" ("Elevant portselanipoes"). It refers to someone who is metaphorically big and clumsy, trampling all over stuff, while meaning no harm. That's me - mentally.

    I have a huge mood aura (whatever mood I'm in), but I don't really control it. When I am among people, I try to be very very careful, but it doesn't really work. I can only frown and I already send out a huge wave of disharmonious emotion. I try not to frown. I try to smile when I think I have frowned unintentionally. When I'm tired, I won't look at people directly and I'm somehow separated from others with an invisible wall. People react to my presence according to my mood. Yes, I know, that's normal and not type-related, but for me the difference is enormous. Like day and night.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
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  15. #95
    Creepy-pokeball

    Default

    I think you will learn to change that.

  16. #96
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    I wonder... do I post less and get less attention or do people give me less attention now that they know I'm just a feeler. I feel like people here stopped taking me seriously after I came out of the closet as an Fe type.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
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  17. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I wonder... do I post less and get less attention or do people give me less attention now that they know I'm just a feeler. I feel like people here stopped taking me seriously after I came out of the closet as an Fe type.
    I don't think that's true at all.

    People have taken your views on very seriously. I think it's more like, "good, she's finally found her type, let's talk about something else for a while". I think your views on and ENFjs are most appreciated and valued.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

  18. #98
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I wonder... do I post less and get less attention or do people give me less attention now that they know I'm just a feeler. I feel like people here stopped taking me seriously after I came out of the closet as an Fe type.
    I don't think that's true at all.

    People have taken your views on very seriously. I think it's more like, "good, she's finally found her type, let's talk about something else for a while". I think your views on and ENFjs are most appreciated and valued.
    yeah, you're probably right. thanks. you're sweet.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

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  19. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I wonder... do I post less and get less attention or do people give me less attention now that they know I'm just a feeler. I feel like people here stopped taking me seriously after I came out of the closet as an Fe type.
    Lol. I think the words "thinking" and "feeling" are the ones that are problematic. As well as "intuition" and "sensing". I think the words don't sound "equal". Use the below definitions instead. They are less biased.

    extraverted intuition = internal statics of objects
    extraverted sensing = external statics of objects
    extraverted logic = external dynamics of objects
    extraverted ethics = internal dynamics of objects
    introverted intuition = internal dynamics of fields
    introverted sensing = external dynamics of fields
    introverted logic = external statics of fields
    introverted ethics = internal statics of fields

    So if it bothers to call yourself "Extroverted Feeler with Introverted Intuition" you can call yourself someone who is expert in understanding "internal dynamics of objects" and supports that skill by accurately perceiving "internal dynamics of fields".

    Actually I like these definitions. I haven't quite decoded them yet though. I think I might find my own type if I really understood what they mean. They sound cool though. I think I will make a thread on that...

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    Default Re: I don't want to be ENFj

    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I need interaction, without it I feel like I'm going nuts. When I interact with someone, I speak too loud and too enthusiastically and I tend to draw attention of the entire group of people and then I feel like, "oh fuck, what do I do now?!". But I can't go back. If I started telling a story I gotta finish it. But I feel scared of the attention. And then later I remember that moment over and over again and I feel like I'm going nuts! I feel shitty when I spend time in solitude, I feel shitty when I try to hang out with others. lose-lose situation.
    I have seen ENFj's do this, it's usually not as bad as you think it is. Just be honest with/true to yourself, and you will be fine.
    "Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
    --Theodore Roosevelt

    "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
    -- Mark Twain

    "Man who stand on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in."
    -- Confucius

  21. #101

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    i officially request that you ask rmcnew to change your name to Jim Beam

  22. #102

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    Default im an enfj 2 !! :(

    i hate being enfj but u can't help who u are...its sooo funny u sound just like me...i feel ur pain...

  23. #103
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Default Re: im an enfj 2 !! :(

    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver
    i hate being enfj but u can't help who u are...its sooo funny u sound just like me...i feel ur pain...
    yeah. I still sometimes feel like I'd rather be almost any other type. I very very rarely feel any happiness about being ENFj and the feedback about ENFjs isn't helping much.

    Don't worry, people do sometimes say that there are also good things to ENFjs. Usually it sounds a bit like, "don't worry, it's not all bad", but there are good evaluations as well. When I think of the general opinion of ENFjs, I remember only bad, but there really seems to have been cases where people actually like some specific ENFj...
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

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  24. #104
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    ... I still sometimes feel like I'd rather be almost any other type. I very very rarely feel any happiness about being ENFj ...
    You know your original stance, this sentence

    I hate it. The thought of me being an ENFj is very depressing. It gives me the feeling of hopelessness. I'm somewhat overwhelmed with negative feelings and I KNOW now that I will feel like that for the rest of my life.

    is exactly the same way I felt when I thought I was ISFp, but when I switched back to INFp it all want away.

    If you really feel ENFj is wrong for you, perhaps it is.

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    Default Re: im an enfj 2 !! :(

    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    yeah. I still sometimes feel like I'd rather be almost any other type. I very very rarely feel any happiness about being ENFj and the feedback about ENFjs isn't helping much.
    If it's any help I felt like this about my type for a long time too. I mean who loves ISTJs, for gods sake. I don't really want to change who I am but I saw a lot of bad things about my type. I've never met any other ISTJs that I really enjoy being around (one that I look up to but she still tends to lecture me), and my dad is ISTJ and displays a lot of rigidity, literal mindedness, sleaziness, self centredness and anger. I don't feel bad about it now but am happy to have my strengths. I think over time I figured out there's enough room in the type that I can be ISTJ and not be my dad or not act like a pompous stuffed shirt.
    female ISTj, sensory subtype

  26. #106
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    Quote Originally Posted by snegledmaca
    If you really feel ENFj is wrong for you, perhaps it is.
    i agree completely. if you have to sit around and "come to terms" with it or force it to fit, it probably isn´t the right type heh.
    6w5 sx
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  27. #107
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    Quote Originally Posted by snegledmaca
    If you really feel ENFj is wrong for you, perhaps it is.
    i agree completely. if you have to sit around and "come to terms" with it or force it to fit, it probably isn´t the right type heh.
    I can totally see myself as ENFj. That's not difficult. The problem is that I don't like what I see. It was very simple for me to be INTj and then ENTj. I felt smart and somehow mentally powerful. When I finally settled with ENFj, reading descriptions was traumatizing. "They say I'm emotional! I'm not emotional, am I? Well, I am kinda opinionated and I do like to show people how I really feel about things, but I didn't know they would all see me as annoyingly emotional. Awww... I don't want them to see me like that! Maybe I have always been the annoyingly emotional kind of person! OMG! I'm so bad!"


    zillah, if I knew you in person, maybe we'd be the best friends and we'd be one of those elitist couples that have their own way of doing everything and who evaluate everyone else according to their own criteria... That would be nice. I lately do think about having more ISTjs nearby, so I think I do actually like ISTjs. :wink:
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

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  28. #108
    Kristiina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fever
    @Kristiina... i just don't understand how u can go from orginally thinking u were INTj to thinking u r now ENFj? i mean their natures r different to the extreme!


    and u guys... ENFjs r not a bad type to be!
    INTj is the default type. People of all types can type themselves INTj... And think about that - I'm MBTI ISTJ/ESTJ.

    INTj and ENFj aren't all that different when the ENFj has a quiet nature. The EJ temperament won't show, the emotions will be visible only to close friends, you can spot the judging moments, love for detail, intuitive and clumsy way of living their life... Someone once said that ENFj is the type with the biggest differences. ENFj can take any role and live it to the max.

    What is good about being ENFj?
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

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  29. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baby
    Quote Originally Posted by XoX
    Quote Originally Posted by Baby
    That post was supposed to be a satire, right?
    It was?
    If it wasn't, I'm a terrible person. It's just that this post was hilarious.

    LMFAO!!!!!!

  30. #110

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    I did not see an introductions forum...but I'll introduce myself with this:

    I love being an ENFJ!!!

  31. #111
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU
    I did not see an introductions forum...but I'll introduce myself with this:

    I love being an ENFJ!!!
    hi, welcome.

    Why is being ENFj good and are you sure you're socionics ENFj?
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

  32. #112

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU
    I love being an ENFJ!!!
    Why is being ENFj good and are you sure you're socionics ENFj?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    zillah, if I knew you in person, maybe we'd be the best friends and we'd be one of those elitist couples that have their own way of doing everything and who evaluate everyone else according to their own criteria... That would be nice. :Smile:
    Count me in.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina
    I lately do think about having more ISTjs nearby, so I think I do actually like ISTjs. :Wink:
    I'm a bit scarred about ENFjs due to my mum. So much so that I have a thing for their conflictors... ISTp. I'm trying to come to terms with it though. I do find the idea of duals really intriguing, but I haven't experienced it yet, in any positive way or as a peer thing. I find myself going to sleep at night puzzling over trying to imagine myself with an ENFJ guy...

    I had a very E_F_ best friend in primary school, I was wondering if she might be ENFj, but no, I think she's ESFp.
    female ISTj, sensory subtype

  33. #113

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    are you sure you're socionics ENFj?
    Yes, I tested with Socionics several years ago and got the same result. I tested recently also, but truth be told it is harder to be objective when taking any personality test after learning and studying my type. The only part which can be of question is the J/P. I have always come up only marginally in the J category, one of the reasons I am here to learn more.
    Why is being ENFj good
    I think it's perhaps that as I get older, the more secure I become. I don't need external validation as much any more that I am a good person. I have accepted the good and the bad, with not just my own temperament but others as well.

    I'm a bit scarred about ENFjs due to my mum.
    I have seen you around, and have read about your mum. I tried to get into another forum, but I was not able to It's a bit sad that you had such a bad experience, but I am glad you are coming to terms. I grew up with an ESTj mom and ISFj father, not the best experience either but I understand it better now than I did growing up.

    So much so that I have a thing for their conflictors... ISTp.
    I have a 'thing' for my 'conflictors' ISTp too...so much so that I married one! I am friends with another as well, I really like them to be honest.
    I also like ISTj's, my best friend and brother fit this.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU
    I have seen you around, and have read about your mum. I tried to get into another forum, but I was not able to It's a bit sad that you had such a bad experience, but I am glad you are coming to terms. I grew up with an ESTj mom and ISFj father, not the best experience either but I understand it better now than I did growing up.


    It's not in the past, either... she's doing the same things now that she's always done. I deal with it better now, but no way would I want a partner who acts like her!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU
    I have a 'thing' for my 'conflictors' ISTp too...so much so that I married one! I am friends with another as well, I really like them to be honest.
    Me too... but it's a doomed fatal attraction thing with me... implied emotion isn't enough for me after a while.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU
    I also like ISTj's, my best friend and brother fit this.
    female ISTj, sensory subtype

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