Inordinate ESE hate

[Bethanyclaire]

ESE can be mean assholes, it’s god damn true. It’s usually ‘in the moment’ though, and then they’re back to being nice. An example..I confided in an ESE friend/colleague that a guy was giving me romantic mixed signals at work. She was supportive. She was also his line manager btw. I confided to her later again that he was still doing it. She told me it didn’t mean anything, I should ignore it. A few of us arrange to meet up to go to an event. The night before I confront the horrible guy and he is ruthlessly cruel in his response to me. The ESE is cool with me, even though I am in pieces, her bf has to explain to her that I am hurting. It’s clear the ESE thinks I should have known better- that I should have realised the guy was an idiot sooner. Later I make a complaint about the guy and she admits ‘his behaviour sometimes made her feel uncomfortable too’.

another time I fell out with an ESE because she and I were arranging a holiday together. I have a brief fall out with our mutual friend who may join us on the holiday. Suddenly I find out they’ve booked the hol without me..

another example, travelling home after a night out and my sis’s friend/ex starts touching my leg. After i tell the ESE (my sister’s other friend) that he shouldn’t do that and she laughs and says well that’s just how men are. Same ESE on another night out is rude when I ask if she’s feeling ok- ‘are you ok?’ she snaps back. She doesn’t like that I made her feel insecure.

and my mum was typical ESE who if you had an argument with her she would completely turn on you and blow everything you did/said out of proportion, and exaggerate it, repeating things you said, taking them out of context, bringing up stuff from the past. It was often to get a reaction, she wanted you to feel bad. But she just seemed mean. I feel bad for the stress she was in, but I also feel bad for me that she never learnt how to deal with conflict..