Hi guys. I'll preface the below by stating I am a 22 -year-old male.
I've been a lurker here for a few months, and have noticed that the discussions are interesting and the advice is helpful. So I've decided to ask fellow INTJs for suggestions concerning the one sticking point in my life.
To make a long story short, I feel alone! I have (a few) people that I consider friends, but the relationships I have with them aren't particularly deep.
One of them is an ENTP, and I have no idea how I'd stay sane without him. I can talk about things with him that no one else I know is interested in. For example, we can talk about mathematics (we both mathematics majors in university), science, computers, games, poker, sports, and lots of other things. In other words, he's been my mental stimulation for a long time. And I love him for that. But as you can expect in Mirror relations, it's not particulary deep.
And likewise with the other people I consider friends, the relationships I have with them aren't deep in any meaningful way. In other words, if I'm having a bad day and just want to vent to someone, or want someone to listen to me talk, there is no one there.
I've been out of a romantic relationship for almost 8 months. It was with an ESFJ (Dual relations), so it was a very satisfying relationship while it lasted. During that time, I had someone to empathize with, to listen to me, to connect with mentally. Since that relationship ended, I have had no one to take the place balance she gave to my psyche. There's no one for me to connect with on a human level, and at times it can feel overwhelming. I don't necessarily mean in the context of a romantic relationship, but in any type of relationship.
Every so often, I go into one of those self-pitying stupors, and nearly come to tears about it. Why is it that everyone else I know can have a connection with someone but I can't? Why is it that in a world of over six billion people, I feel completely alone at the end of each day? All of this is causing me a lot of stress, and I am worried that this is unduly affecting my mental health.
I just don't feel like a normal person (given the fact that I know I'm INTJ), and I would give anything just to have one person to be mentally/emotionally intimate with. It certainly doesn't help that I'm not full of self-confidence ("I'm too introverted/different/strange to ever find another such person"). It just seems like such a trial for me to get to know anyone on more than a superficial basis.
And so finally, I am earnestly asking any of you for advice. Have any of you experienced, or are experiencing, anything similar? If so, did you manage to find an effective way of dealing with it? I am anxious to hear anything you guys have to say. Thanks in advance.