Benefit, supervisor, conflict, mirage; these intertypes bring real misunderstandings at the psyhcological level; ie.: your personalities just don't click right, irregardless of familly member relationships, life experiences, history, amount of love. From what I read, you recognize your problems with this person stem from tangible differences in your two personalities, and not some other contributing factors. That's tough mate, especiallly since probably both love each other.

This person you speak of sounds like an Fe-dom, maybe an ESFj.