I have a relation description, could you help me figure it out.
This person secretly resents me, well despises would be more appropriate. It's a family member. They would never say such a thing through, and I don't think they're even aware of it. They're the kind of person that conforms to societal norms. A person must act a certain way, certain social rules and gestures must be conformed to, gender roles and so on. I'm not really bothered by that aspect, I've come to live with it, through the hypocrisy between their words and actions does get to me sometimes.
Another thing this person does is very actively thrusts their lifestyle upon me. All that societal roles, gender roles and stuff. They will make stuff up and be convinced it's the truth, like everybody is doing it, nobody is doing it and so on. And they will tell me to act and think a certain way. And then when I ignore them will come back time and time again, with increasing resolve and vigor until a fight escalates. Which is then for that person completely out of the blue and unprovoked, a senseless attack by me on them. This then repeats over and over again.
They also actively disapprove and try to change my existing behavior. Every time they notice it they bash it. This is less problematic as it is easier to ignore. But it does escalate sometimes when I try to reason with them. As there really is no reasoning with them because they are a priori correct. The reject anything that challenges these a priori conclusions and justify it with an appeal to some authority like read it somewhere, saw all the people doing it, all the experts are saying it and so on.
They also have violent mood swings. Regular rage rampages when they say some truly horrible things. I though about writing some of that stuff down, just in case I want to truly hurt somebody in the future. Though they're not really mood swings, it happens if something or somebody clashes with how they view reality. That becomes the most evil thing in the world and they are the mega victim, their suffering unrivaled. I've gotten use to them, but still something inside me dies a little everytime I'm subjected to it.
Thinking about their life is also really painful. As they've thrown away their hopes, dreams and aspirations, basically their life, just to conform to societal roles. They could do so much and yet live like a slave. They have no ambition, aspirations, basically if something is not in front of their eyes it may as well not exist. They just think and see things that are here and now, leading to some truly horrible long term solutions. I can see it happening, I know what's going to happen, and it pains me to look at it.
We don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. My ways and methods are seen as unintended mistakes on my part and they try to steer me on to the right path. I see their entire life as a waste of possibility and potential and see them as incompetent to give out the advice and guidance they give out so I reject it. This is the kind of person that were they an acquaintance I would forget about them almost instantly and would have no contact with them. My interaction with this person can be summed up as slowly dieing inside, and it's gotten to the point where I'm actually developing medical conditions like ulcers because of their impact on my life. I use to be a high energy, constantly active person, doing ten things at once, and now I spend a lot of my time just trying to calm myself down.
So I'm wondering what relation is it and can it be improved?